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minority groups
I've been "going out" with this guy ever since this party where we had to kiss for truth or dare...
we liked each other and talked every day for several days.
when we were talking on the phone, I asked him about the things he didnt like, and he said his siblings and gays.
His mom had made this one kinda racist joke that i heard abot african americans, and his brother had called me a name (I'm Jewish)
Could it just be a coincidence about his family? (I'm not gay or anything, but I believe in rights of minorities, being one).
Should I break up with him, or what?
<13/f>(sorry for it being so long)help!
(his family is kind of the rich white christian type but he seemed sweet)
-HeLpMe-
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Talk to him!
and don't take what other people say seriously. You need to talk to him about things like this. If you really like the guy, stay with him, but if his family bothers you, you don't have to break up with him, but try to avoid the fam. You're dating him, not his mom or brother. I also think that you need to tell him that this is bothering you.
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Your question left me a little confused, but I'll do my best =)
If what this guy is saying bothers you, then speak up! The relationship isn't going to last if you don't. If you two are compatible, he should understand--he may have been saying those things without even realizing they hurt your feelings. Just talk to him! Good luck =)
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Hi Sweetie,
This relationship will defenetly be problematic. Although I'd like to point something before I continue answering your question that's a bit off-topic. I'm sure you have noticed every other question is stupid and straight out lame and mispelled. I wanted to say "thank you" for asking something a decent question worth answering. Back to the subject.
Did you know the guy BEFORE the party? The mistake of most relationships that fail and end up awkwardly is that they were spontanious and the coupple did not know each other. If you had known him he'd have more respect for you and tell his family to act more appropriate at least in yur prescence. If it is true that you haven't known him very long I'd suggest to take things slower and get to know each other as just friends longer. Meaning... don't go to each other's houses much and don't get too involved in each other's lifes (such as family stuff, like stop having anything to do with his family. Then your relaionship will become stronger.
If you laready knew him on the friends basis or don't like my idea much then it's OK. What you can do is talk to him about him. He doesn't have to choose between his family or you since there's no need to. What he DOES have to do is handle the situation. Whether is telling his family to act appropriate or keeping you and his family seperate he has to do something. Honestly for a long-term relationship the family will become an issue. By then if you find yourself you love him or something then talk to the family and him... maybe one day he may have to choose... maybe the family may have to change... That's all a "maybe-one-day".
However, if he's a racists, homophobic, people-hating, KKK-Nazi loving bastard too then maybe you should move on. If someone can't respect people than he has issues! ...For now (since you don't know if he shares the same morals of his family) just give him a chance.
Take care and have a good night. My best wishes! ~Blessed Be...
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dont break up with him, but if he makes fun of you then dump him. he should also stick up for you.
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If you're going out with the boy and HE starts to make fun of you becuase of your minority, then the best thing would probably to break up with him. If it's his family, then you shouldn't do it over them. This is a relationship between you and him, not his family. Also, you shouldn't feel uncomforable around him because of it. If he makes you feel uncomfortable, then I would probably break up with him also. But what's up with him not calling you in 4 days? That's something that should be looked into. Maybe you should call him. His family might make it hard for him to be with you, they might tease him a lot for it, because they're jerks. The best thing to do is talk with HIM about it, and let him know that you don't know what should be done and ask him to tell his brothers to shut their mouths. If the problem persists and it just keeps on making you feel even more uncomfortable, then you might consider breaking it off.
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those prejudice losers. next time, tell them what you think. don't be shy.
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You should probably consider breaking up with him if they continue to make fun of you because of religion or beliefs of race and such. Never should you feel uncomfortable or out of place in a relationship. If you feel this way it's best to get out of it. Just because you have different opinions on something does not mean you should brak up. Example: people that are gay. But if it gets to the point that he and his family pressures you into believing what they say or put your opinions down you should definitely think about moving on to some other guy. You've probably heard already that you should never change yourself to capture a guys attention. This goes for your beliefs too. Always listen to yourself, and respect the beliefs you have, never ever reconsider to do that for some guy. Try talking to him to get a better uderstanding of things. Ask him if having different views on things are okay with him and his family. They should respect your beliefs, but remember they don't have to agree with them. If it becomes a problem whereas they might pressure you into different ideas, then you should talk to them about it first. If nothing improves, it's time to find a new guy.
Love,
Mandee
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Dont break up with your boyfriend just because his family are racists. And you should respect the fact that he's not into the whole gay thing, people have their own opinions.
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