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Question Posted Thursday September 30 2004, 11:44 am

ok well its only the third week of school ive missed 7 days so far and we can only miss 9 in a semester or quarter something like that but im sick so i cant help it. anyways i have FS in ALL my classes! jus because im missin 2 things its crazy. im in highschool and its really hard for me. english class is the hardest becuz i can never think of anything to write on essays or anything. and math is hard because i dont understand divison everything else it ok. my mom said if i keep my grades up i get a cell ( im in 10th ). she knows how much i want a cell so she uses that to make me get good grades. lately ive been really stressed because my ex boyfriend is always emailing me saying i have no life and im a bitch. then my bestfriend keeps sayin that im going to fail because ive missed so many days and ect. and all she does it put her problems on me and make them my problems. everyones just making it worst for me and making me worry. what do i do? how do i keep my grades up? thanks.

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missing-identity-seeker answered Thursday September 30 2004, 7:38 pm:
TO: (blank)

first hard!! lolz thats the obvious one..another thing is to try and isolate yourself from anything that would sidetrack you... for me i try not to go on the comp unles i REALLIEEE need to because then i hab AIM runnin and i like itch in my pants to talk to ppl...also ask your teachers if there is ANY WAY that you can make up watebe you missed coz of course you werent there and how could you make that up rite? do a lotta extra credit and thats about all you can do...ya noe?

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vickidee123 answered Thursday September 30 2004, 5:13 pm:
first of all calm down. your ex-boyfriend forget about him, ignore him. your friends tell them that they are putting pressure on you and if they're good friends they'll understand. you could ask your teacher for extra help or get a tutor. in english write essays on what you know like, your role model, something thats happened in the past. in math if you dont understand division, make a couple math problems for you to practice with.

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ballerina04 answered Thursday September 30 2004, 3:48 pm:
first off, if you're so sick, go see a doctor. secondly, you have to find a way to do your work. high schools will have programs for kids who need some help with things. make an appointment with your guidance counselor and get information. good luck. send me something if you need more help or just want to talk. best wishes! x33 Kristen

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BlackAngel answered Thursday September 30 2004, 3:13 pm:
I've been out sick for about as long this year. Same thing, really worried about keeping my grades up, in 10th etc.
I've been actually emailing my teachers and they've been emailing me back with the handouts from class, and the assignments as attachments, and the stuff that they can't email, they ask me to have a parent come pick it up from the office at school. If you have a way of contacting your teachers, if you could call them or something, and get the assignments, that'll at least help to get you caught up. Also, if you have friends in your classes, or someone you can ask, ask them to copy the handouts and stuff and get it to you.
About your friend and ex, a) ignore your ex. He's being stupid and probably trying to make you feel bad. If he's worrying you, it's working. Ignore him, he's not worth the attention. As for your best friend well, doesn't seem that she's being a very good friend huh. Tell her what she's doing isn't helping, and that you need the help to get your grades back up.
Best of luck

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Roxybabii922 answered Thursday September 30 2004, 1:04 pm:
Just try and stay focused on what you need to accomplish, tell your friend that you arent trying to be mean but you have alot of stuff going on to and you have stuff that you need to take care of to get caught up in school so that you can keep your grades up. Try and ignore everything your ex says he's just being an ass for no reason, most guys are like that... it's probably just a childish way of saying that he still likes you but yeah...

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FernGully answered Thursday September 30 2004, 12:28 pm:
You need to find some ways to relax and the first step to that would be giving yourself some time to do whatever it is you love most to do. Take a hot bath, go for a walk, do something to clear your head. As for missing the maximum number of days of school, they can make exceptions. You have a serious issue with stress, and it needs to be taken care of. Talk to a guidance counsellor as well as your mom. If no one knows - no one can help you.
Your guidance counsellor can work on getting you help for just about everything - he/she can speak to your teachers about getting you extra help, for writing essays and possibly a volunteer tutor for math. He/she can speak to your schools administration about your attendance and make sure that you wont fail anything if something happens or you are sick again and miss more days.
Tell your friends that if they are going to talk to you about school, they had better make sure that they are trying to help you and not trying to stress you out more. Make sure they know that you aren't missing days just for the hell of it, they will work on trying to make you feel better if they know that your situation is serious.

As for your exboyfriend, block his email address from your email account. Send him an email back telling him that if he emails you again and harasses you, you will be taking legal action and will inform his internet service provider that he is harassing you.
(You can be bluffing, but most likely it will scare him away from sending you asshole emails).
And lastly, drink some green tea, have some vitamins, work on getting healthy. You cant concentrate on anything if you aren't healthy. If you don't feel better soon, tell your mom and get yourself to the doctors.

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alisonmarie answered Thursday September 30 2004, 12:02 pm:
Wow. It sounds like you are very stressed. Here's the first thing I would do: As soon as you feel better, make an appointment with a guidance counselor for both you and your mother to attend. Make sure to bring a doctor's note explaining that you were ill. If you were genuinely ill and manage to bring your grades back up, the school should not penalize you.

Explain your problems to the counselor - maybe you need to be in a different math class or get some extra tutoring. If you don't ask for help out of the situation, you're not going to get it.

I would then focus on small things. Finish one essay at a time instead of thinking of all the other homework you have. It's easy to get overwhelming - some people like making lists of everything they have to do and then crossing stuff off once it's done.

As far as English class goes, aren't you assigned essay topics? If not, the thing to do is write about what made you the most angry, curious, or excited. You're bound to get a good essay if you write about something that actually matters to you. Speaking to your teacher can also help. There is no shame in asking for help. It's mature to recognize your problems and try to overcome them.

As far as your ex goes, you have two main options: You can let him affect your life, or not. This means you could just delete every email he sends you without opening them, which would probably cause you the least aggravation. He can't make things worse unless you allow him to.

As far as your best friend - let her know when she's bothering you. Tell her you're working to NOT fail, and her support is needed. Support is not telling you how badly you are doing.

It's also not a bad idea to let her know that you can't deal with two sets of problems - you'll want to listen to her and help her, but sometimes it's just not reasonable. It's okay to say that you need to focus on yourself for a little while. A good friend should recognize this.

Above all, breathe. You will get through this. The fact that you're asking for advice here tells me you will suceed - because you WANT to.

Good luck, and I hope you feel better soon.

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