xlivexyourxlifex's advice column | Main Page

home view feedback ask questions add as friend advicenators

Gender:

Female

Location:

LT

Occupation:

High school student

Age:

15

Member Since:

July 4, 2006

Answers:

56

Last Update:

October 24, 2007

Visitors:

3954

Favorite Columnists

bLue_in_tHe_faCe

its_melissa_DuH

Main Categories:

about

okay. my name is ashley for those who are wondering and im 15 years young. im about to be a sophomore in highschool and basically like to give people advice. i have been told that the things i say are pretty good butif you dont like what i say then good for you, i tried. Ask me anything im always up for the challenge and when i answer your question i normally try and relate it to things similar going on in my life. Say anything rude and i will delete the comment. if you need help and dont want others to see it you can message me on myspace or you can IM me at xBESTmemory x3

advice

So, me and my friend just admitted to liking each other about a week ago and we've been talking about dating and being together.

Theres a huge problem, it's way bad timing. He will be leaving for the Marines soon after Thanksgiving. We are both happy to wait but the thing is that this JUST started. I mean, we aren't in love so I'm not sure if these feelings will just fade overtime on his part and I'll be waiting for someone who can't break up with me.

But I really think this guy is great and I'd be passing up the chance with someone wonderful, so I'm pretty stuck.

So I'm wondering if it's a bad idea to start something and ANYONE who has experience to please share their stories, I'm open to any answer:)

well him leaving for the marines is basically i test of how much you like eachother and if it is true love it will be meant to be. When he comes back if you still have the feelings for him you did before you'll know that you are supposed to be together.
hope this helped =]

so theres this guy and i like him a lot. but the problem is i dont talk to him that much. i went out with him last year and i liked him ever since. but hes a huge jerk and dumped me bcuz i didnt make out with him right away. i was over h
im but theres just something about him that is just adorable. what should i do about it.?

when you see someone that you went out with and you really cared about it is normal to see them and feel that you still like them...you dont its basically you just missing what the two of you had not him literally. But from what you have said he seems to be a hugee jerk. just dont go by him much, if he flirts with you ignore it.
hope this helped =]

i just made cheer captain for my high school jv squad. two other girls are both co-captains. im super excited, but im kind of worried..i dont want to let my coach down and make her think i dont deserve it, but i dont want to be too pushy to the other girls and make them hate me haha. anyways, please give me any advice you can think of about certain things to do, not to do, and all that other good stuff thanks!! :D

basically to be a good captain is to never say "Well i'm the captain so whatever i choose goes" yes that is normally how it goes but for most things you should have the whole squad choose. this way they know you aren't going to take up all this power which could make them not vote for you in the coming seasons. But one thing you are in charge of is making sure they dont get out of hand. cheerleading is a tough one because everyone loves to talk...especially after you just ran through your routine. keep that down and the catiness down and you'll be great =] hope this helped.

This guy was my classmate last semester and we didnt really talk as in never only when i changed my class i saw him in that class and i didnt have any choice bcoz there was only one vacant chair which was next to him so ya i sat and he was smiling i said hi then he said hi .. well i didn't like him that way because duh i didn't know him..then one day i was absent he sent me a message on myspace and said he ditched 6th period class he also said he was gonna asked me to go with him in the library walk around... he was gonna asked me out... but too bad i told him I was sick that day..he sent me a message again and he said can you be my girlfriend? and then i said no..we should just be friends...until now i see him he has a new girl but he still looking at me..last time i passed by him then he was with his friends he was looking ..lmao.. well i really want to say hi to him but i can't.. we still talk on myspace we always send messages..he still asking me to go somewhere with him but i keep on telling him no thank you.. and i can tell that he told his friends that he liked me.. bcoz i see them pushing him everytime i pass by them... I'm just confused... im sorry if my grammar is not really specific ...

well if you are still confused on if you like him or not try hanging out with him sometime instead of always saying no. and if you want to keep it as less awkward as possible hang out in a group so that if the conversation is dead you have someone else there to help you bring it up. And all those signs you have said up there deff. shows that he likes you.
hope this helped =]

Ok so i like this guy and i think he likes me but he just wont talk to me! Its almost ridiculous he stares at me always seems to be where i am talks to all my friends looks at me and kinda puts his head down. Is it just me or am i going insane here!? Im thinking about making the first move and saying hey but the truth is im amazingly shy. I just want to know does anyone think he does or doesnt. Thanks a lot. buh bye!

14- female

well. like most girls they are confused my the way the boy brains work. haha. but those are signs of him liking you and most likely he is a rare one and is really shy. Just start up the conversation because he maybe really shy and get nervous to talk to you. dont be scared to talk to him, just be yourself.
hope this helped =]

does anyone know a song about a girl who's in love with her best friend?

just friends by the jonas brothers (my favorite)
my bestfriends hot - by the dollyrots
could it be - christy carlson romano
hate that i love you - rhianna

those are the only ones i can think of off the top of me head.
hope this helped you =]

14/f/freshman

i really like this boy, let's call him E. he's a sophmore.. his older brother is best friends with my older brother, so i see him alot. but i'm kindof shy when it comes to boys, so i dont' talk to him. however, we talk all the time on AIM. i usually see him at school, but i never have the courage to talk to him..

now there's another boy, N. i used to like him, but i don't have those feelings for him anymore. he's three years older than me, a junior. but i've known him since i was 7, because he went to my church. he asked me to go to homecoming with him, and i said idk because i was thinking about askeing E. but he said he didn't want to wait forever, that he had other girls he was gonna ask. so i said yes.

however, i really really like E. what do i do? i know i should follow through with my promise to go with N, but i don't want to feel jealous if i see E with a different date.. i'm so confused, please help :/

well. N seems to be somewhat rude about it since he said he wasnt going to wait forever..which is understandable..but saying he has other girls to ask isnt very nice to say..in that terms at least. try mentioning homecoming to E and see what he says, and obviously as N said he already had other girls he could ask. YOu could also talk it over with N.
hope this helped =]

i want to be a cheerleader so bad! i've wanted to be one ever since 5th grade and now im in 9th. theres tryouts again in march, what can i do and what do i have to learn to be a cheerleader?
please give me full details. thankss so much! :]

Well to start off cheerleading is such an amazing sport...yes sport because it is one =]...and is also one of the most difficult ones to learn. It is not quickly learned, such as the jumps, motions, coordination, such on and such on. But it extremely fun once you get it all down. Start by every night doing streches such as stradles and butterflies. Join some tumbling classes to get tumbling because knowing cheerleading, tumbling means a lot these days. Most squads require at least a back handspring, and thats the fundamentals..once you get that down your pretty much set for tumbling and the rest of your tumbling will just fall into place. You are most likely going to need to stunt, and if you have never stunted before this could be a challenge, so you should start working out you need basically all muscle which is legs, abs, and arms. That is super important to do, especially so you can lift the girls..bc trustt mee. some of those girls are not light. haha. and if you didnt want to go to a gym then you could even just work out at home by doing simple push ups, sit up, and v-ups. (which is when you lay on your back and lift your legs and back up leaving your butt on the ground..this works your abs really good) also practice jumps and motions. You could look them up simply on google by typing in cheerleading motions & jumps. Or they have books out that teaching you simple cheers and motions to do so that you could be practicing. There are also video tapes that teach you dances and cheers that could also help you practice. do all this and im sure that you could become an amazing cheerleader ! best of luck.

15/f

so theres this guy and i really like him a lot but the thing is he knows i like him but doesnt know me or even what i look like ... and one of my best guy firends is best friends with him and my best guy friend is dating my best girl friend so me and my biff have been trying to set something up where all 4 of us could hangout together...we are probably hanging out tommorow ... so 1st do you think this will be awkward? 2 what should i wear?!? 3 i need conversation topics .. ive never even talked to him before at all! (hes uber shy)

ahhh im so worried i really need some help i really want and need this to work i havent had a boyfriend in over a year and i havent hooked up in 6 months so i really want this to work out and i reallyyyyy like him

please and thanks

so i am basically in the same situation. but what you to do is just be yourself that way you know he would be liking you for you and not who you would be pretending to be. but one thing is make sure that you arent pretending to be stupid, from what ive heard from guys they hate it when girls do it. for the awkward part...no it shouldnt be awkward since you'll have 2 of your bestfriends there. talking should normally just come when your like all talking. and as to what to wear, whatever you want. i always go with whats most comfratable to me =]
hope this helped

does anyone no any quotes about being replaced in a friendship by someone elseeee , thanks id love you foreverrrrrrr

well i know one specifically but it says that shes replaced by a guy, its....

you were my best friend
in the entire world; sleepovers,
pillow fights, late night talks,
inside jokes that no one else would
know. then you met him & now...
i don’t even know who you are anymore.

otherwise if you go to xanga.com they normally have a lot of them

hope this helped =]

when im talking with my boyfriend sometimes he says hes so ugly. and i think hes adorable so i tell him hes not hes really good looking. then he will say something like "you are the only one who thinks that" and occaisonally he will say "it doesnt matter what anyone but you thinks anyway but im still ugly" is he implying something? i get worried. or is he just really self conscious? i try to tell him hes not but he wont agree.

like most guys they need to be reassured of things, such as how they look, how good they are at sports and such. so he is most likely just wanting to be reminded. nothing to worry about =]

ok, normally i am good at love dilemmas, but this one stumps me.

I have been with a guy that I really do love for 7 months. Before him, I dated a guy a state away from me. Now, my ex bf was very caring, nice, etc...or so it seemed. We talked through webcam and instant messages. Well, he wanted to see me on webcam one day and I guess he didnt like what he saw, so the next day he txted me and said it was over. I didnt love him, but i was infatuated with him and that just broke my heart. I got over him and months later i found my current bf. Well, just now while I was on the phone with my bf, I got an instant message from my ex. And it kind of feels like those feelings could still be there. My question is, is it something I should be worried about? I think they could be just friendship feelings, but im not sure. Any help is appreciated!

ive gone through this before also. but what i always just think is okay its not that i like him its just whenever you talk to him you think about times you had and i guess you could say miss them. dont be worried about it, its just normal for this to happen especially if you havent talked to him in a while
hoped this helped =]

Ok. Me and this guy talk alot on the computer and we laugh and hes says Im the only one who ever laughs to his joke and none of his friends do and he will talk like 30 or 1hr extra with me when hes not suppose too. But When Im around him we never talk!! And Im too shy to ask him stuff and I dont know if he like me or not! Does that mean he likes me. Because along ime ago he said I was pretty and asked me if I consider hm as a friend...becuase we were playing to questuon game. So Does he like me?

Help.

my guess would be that yes he does like you. some boys get tounge tied when talking in person but online they can be themselves. other guys hate to talk online and rather talk in person. just be yourself as much as you can ((i know it can be hard, im really shy in person to)) but just try hanging out alot more and you can get more comfratable. and to find out for sure if he likes you ask him online by saying something like soo who do you like? and see who he says.
hope this helped =]

hi, i was wondering if anybody knew any products that help with really oily skin? also with acne.
mine isn't too bad, but i'd like it to clear up :]

any suggestions are very much appreciated :]

neutrogena oil free achne wash. i use that everyday twice a day and then i put ondove face mosturizer...lotion.
hope this helped =]

what's a good shampoo/conditioner hair product?

I've heard these work good-

Herbal essences
dove
sunsilk
fructis
suave

My friend said that pantene actually makes your hair worse and fall out!!!

if you can, please rate how well each hair product i've mentioned is. thanks

well i dont know what your friend is talking about but pantene doesnt make your hair fall out. i use pantene pro-v every single day and my hair is perfectly fine. Alot of people are always telling me how soft my hair feels.
hope this helped =]

i want to do something really memorable with my girl friends this summer. i have a lot of guy friends too and despite that they're my friends the guys just normally cause stress so i want something to do with my girls. there's about 5 of us and i want like a girls night out sort of thing, or something to do during the day, doesn't matter. i want it to be something that we dont normally do. we're 15 some 16 and we normally go to the movies or the mall or to somebody's house. so any ideas? thanks a bunch

me and my friends are always looking for fun things to do that most people dont think of doing. Try starting the night off mini golfing or going to dave and busters for some food and games. then have a campout if someone has a tent and pitch it up and sleep out there for a change. if someone has a pool to go for a fun night swim.
hope this gave you some ideas =]

WARNING: This will sound ridicolous, BUT that doesn't make it any less important.

So you know these surveys people send out on myspace, facebook, hotmail etc (The ones with questions about them like "what do you think of my hair" that their friends are supposed to answer!) Well, I desperately want my crush to send it out cause I have some GREAT answers in mind for some of them, but he's not the survey-sending type. We havn't talked for about 5 months ((sadly, we lost touch) and I thought I flirty email like that would be a great way to get him back into my life, but I don't want to be the first one to send it out, and I don't want to TELL him to send it out either (so pathetic!) is there anything I can do? (besides hack him, send it out to myself and some others, answer it, and give him back the password!!)

Thanks!

Well as many of us too have been in this position. What i would do is just fill it up yourself and send it to him. and if you feel completely ridicuoulous just put something as the headline like "heyy, i was boredd =]" then at the bottom you could "send it back sometime if your bored too"
hope this helped =]

K,
so after my period last month, my boyfriend and i had sex twice. Both times we had used condoms, and they didn't break because he checks after every time. I'm 2 and a half weeks late for my period, yet I've been under a lot of stress... such as my boyfriend moving a state away, starting a new job, my parents not talking, plus this whole situation. I haven't had any of the symptoms of pregnancy, except hot flashes in the midde of the night; only because my bed covers my A/C vent and I don't have a fan in my room. What are the chances of me being pregnant?

my guess is that you arent pregnant. but to be sure just get a pregnancy test.
hope this helped =]

My ex from like 5th grade, well, he's been popping in my head everyday for like the past week, and I even had a dream about him last night. I miss him so much. I haven't even seen him in 3 years, but I just want to talk to him, so, so, badly. And see how he's doing (he moved a few years ago).

-His email changes now and then, and the one I have right now is no longer in use, so I don't know it.

-I don't know the address to the house he moved to.

-I don't know his screen name or whatever his email is now.

-I don't know his phone number or his cell (or if he even has one)

I want to talk to him so badly. All I know is the area he lives in. I want to talk to him! Please don't tell me it's not going to happen. There has GOT to be a way I can get his email!! There HAS to be. Does anyone know?!

since you know the area that he lives him you could go onto yellowpages.com and type it in and his last name and that should get you a number that you could call to find out all his other info. orr if you have alot of timeon your hands to a myspace search to see if he has a myspace.
hope this helped you =]

13/f
im a pretty friendly person i guess... i like talking to people and i always try to be really nice to everyone. so i talk to a lot of different people on myspace, AIM and texting. but when i start talking to guys and get to know them, sometimes they end up thinking that i like them. and then they start liking me. its not like im being flirty or anything, i just talk about normal stuff. so im not leading them on or anything. but i feel really guilty, cuz i just like them as friends (and btw i do have a bf). sometimes i think, maybe i shouldnt talk to guys at all, cuz it will only make them think i like them. is it possible to talk with guys and just be friends? or do they always end up wanting it to be more?

you should keep talking to them. most people just have that way about them that seems flirty to them but not to you, its just who you are. i have a friend who doesnt even realize she is flirting. you aren't leading them on especially if you have a boyfriend and eventually the guys will realize that.
hope this helped =]

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>