about

im sammay, im seventeen♥.
i have a wonderful boyfriend♥
his name is ray allshouse♥
i love scuba diving♥,
and other outdoor activities♥.
i am a free driver also♥.
im also a rape advocate♥.
i have been raped♥,
in the past. so mostly♥,
i deal with rape situations♥.
im in college, i got my ged when♥,
i was well sixteen and been in college♥.
ever since i been sixteen♥.
getting good grades♥.
becoming a physcologist♥,
criminal and victim♥.
i think if i get both sides♥,
it would help alot more, with ♥
victims, since i could have more answers♥.
im going to be a rape/molested
phycologist, in my spare time♥.
appose of being a rape advocate♥.
i decided to choose this route♥,
because im always involved with ♥
situations that friends, family ♥
and people i dont know, get out ♥
of serious issues or problems♥.
i seem to do a better job♥,
then my school counselors♥.
nobody really went to them♥,
they usually just came to me♥,
or dropped a note in my locker♥.
told me where to leave the note back ♥
and left. I helped people ♥
who didnt want to be seen or noticed♥.
so if you need anyone, or advice♥.
i give my best! and havent had ♥
any complaints yet. i have been thanked ♥
and thanked time, time again♥.
i take special care of those in need♥,
and time and effort♥.
need anything, im here for you♥.

-Sammay ♥


advice

omg im so scared of college! im not scared of making friends, im scared of writing long papers and reading alot and tests. what should i do??

yea its usually scary, i was scared too. its not that HARD trust me, they make it seem more difficult then it is, just take a deep breath! just make sure you have more time for college, then other things. school should always be number one on your priority list and dont get BEHIND! or you will be all screwed over and then you will have to worry about those long PAPERS and lots OF READING. its not that bad :)

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I know this guy. I think i have a crush on him.
but i dont know if he likes me or even wants to be my friend at all.

He's a consultant and talks extremely well when i ask him for advise on work.

However, he gets shy/uncomfortable, when i ask him simple personal questions for eg: Do you go for swimming. I think he has a problem of talking about himself to new people or just not that friendly.

So one day, i gave him some sweets via his secretary (i didnt really know him that well at that time in office) and he was quite startled and stared at me and waited for me to say something when i bumped at him at the doorway.
He had those puppy eyes..but didnt say word!.
I pretended not to appear interested in him becos i was too shy.!

He could have just thank me for the sweets but he didnt.

Later, i sent him email and was able to chat with him about work..and he responded quite well.

How do i get him to open up to me as a normal friend?

What can i say/should not say to him when i call him? Can i call him to say goodnight to him? I dont want to appear too invasive ...

Would appreciate your advice.


first of all the next time, you talk to him online. i would ask him, i would be straight up and say "why wont you talk to me as a normal friend?" and see what he has to say, i bet he has a reason, and if he says theres no reason what so ever or if there is, just tell him you want to be friends, and if its okay with him, and who knows he might open up a little more and respect that you asked him straight up what was bothering you and wanted to know. if he says it wont work being friends ask him why. i would just ask a bunch of question, not too many. but enough to get you what you needed out of him, to understand. but dont just like BLURT it out at the beginning ask him something you need help with and talk for about 5-10 minutes before you start talking about being friends type things. if he is shy or whatever, tell him he has no reason to be shy, because your a good person and you want to spend time with him, not just in the office but to go take lunch breaks with him and go get coffee. hopefully he will be excited and be like yea, deffinately lets do that. if not, then hes a big fat jerk if he just going to blow you off, which i really doubt he will do since you said he was a "shy" and "uncomfortable" type of guy. when you see him in person say hi, and see if he will respond. making conversations is a good thing, people respect people when they talk and have conversations, you can talk about the weather talk about a sport you play or you going to the gym, or the funniest thing that happend in work that day. also, make sure he is SINGLE too. Some men that are married go to work without a wedding ring. its a thing they have. but yea, just becareful. when he says its cool to be friends ask him questions about himself and then ask him to ask you questions and if he says he doesnt know any answer the questions you asked him. i hope everything works out, if you need me write me another note. thanks.

-sammay

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I'm still in love with my exboyfriend. I haven't talked to him much since we broke up in August but he's always been on my mind. Well I asked him to be on my team for an academic game and he agreed so we were going to meet somewhere ( me him and my other partner ) and I was thinking about telling him I still loved him but I fear rejection A LOT. Its almost impossible for me to ask someone out...no matter how much I love them. What should I do? PLEASE HELP

first of all an ex boyfriend is an ex boyfriend for a reason IT DIDNT WORK OUT! and if it didnt work out the first time it aint going to work out now. so if i were you get over him dont talk to him for atleast 3-5months and ull be cured. But if you decide not to take that advice, then just be like hey do you still have feelings for me? and if he says yes!! your in there. if he says no, like i said above. GET RID OF HIM!

-sammay

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I love this guy but I don't think he likes me because of the music I listen to now (( emo, rock, etc. )) He is my exboyfriend but when I dated him last year, I was really preppy and loved rap...what should I do?

first of all ex boyfriends are ex boyfriends for a reason, it didnt work out. it probably wont work out now. i wouldnt waste my breathe seriously. but if you want too, i think hed understand if not. get rid of him.

-sammay

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ok so im 15 and never had a boyfriend and thats not what bugs me what bugs me is that im practically incapable of flirting. i just dont get it. i dont know how to tell if a guy is flirting with me or how to flirt back i can comfortably talk to my friends that are guys but if im around someone who i like im just not myself and it bugs me b/c i become kind of uptight and i just want to get this whole flirting thing like everyone else. please help!

if i were you, i would imagine yourself as if they were your guy friends, if you treat a guy like a flirtacious freak, there going to be like wow this girl only wants to date me, not have a serious conversation or play some basketball after school. communication is important around that age. 14 and below it was like were dating, and never talked to your boyfriend it just said you were dating, and now your starting to mature, you have to start treating guys you want to date as if they are you bestfriends. I do! and i get so many guys it aint funny, i steal girls boyfriends. which is bad!!! but guys love it.

trust me! its a 100% gaurantee.

-sammay

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my friends and i are on a basketball team but it seems like they dont care if we win or lose. how do i tell them to step up their game with out sounding like a bitchy dictator?

well if i were you, id tell them they need to work a little harder. but maybe its because they really dont care, its a GAME there not just there to win EVERYTIME their there to have fun. they dont sweat there ass off for no reason, you know. i guess if i were i would tell them straight up, how you feel and be like "im sorry if i sound like a bitch but im trying not too"... and then say what you need to say... best thing for this situation is communication, your a team and there is no "U" or "I" in team.

-sammay

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hi! i'm 15 and a female. i'm plus size and i dress really nice, some guys tell me that i'm pretty but none of them seem to want to date me, why is that? how do i get atleast one of those guys to wanna date me?

they love your sense of style and your personality, there just dumb. they want a model fashion skinny anerexic girl. i know alot of guys that are 17+ that rather choose a plus size girl over a skinny one anyday. im average and my best friend is PLUS SIZE and like, she is so beautiful!!! and she gets more men then i do. Im pretty good looking myself, i guess it depends on the age, and maturity.

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okay hi! i am not new to this site but i have not been on in a long time. i was just wondering how to put in a tampon? i have been struggling with the decision to use one or not and my mom told me that i should. i am just to scared to ask her how to put it in and everything. can you give me a website or something that can explain this process to me..thank u very much. i look forward to your answers.

if you buy a box of tampons they give step by step instructions. it isnt hard. just stick the applicator in and push the thing stick til it up to the fat part of the bottom of the tampon applicator and pull the plastic out and there you go.

-sammay

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i want to go to comm. college for a year then transfer to a university but does it look bad to the university that ive been to community college? like-- would they think i didnt get into a university?

no it doesnt!!! i did that i went to a community college and got my associates degree, for my first year and a half of school and transfered to a unv. they didnt care, all they cared was that i got good grades, in which i did! A's & B's and they were like AWESOME!! and accepted me, you have nothing to worry about. its the smartest thing to do, ask any unv. theyd tell you ur first yr go to a community college, its easier and plus you start off with good grades.

-sammay


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Hi. I am 14 and I'm homeschooled. I am a getting more and more nervous about college each day. I keep thinking "What if I'm not prepared?" or "I'm scared." I dont know how to keep calm and prepare myself. Please Help! Thanks.

i started college at 16 years old. i was so nervous! i thought people would make fun of me because i was so young. but people respected me. college is fun, you have NOTHING to worry about. I was soooo nervous, you will be the first day but after that!!! you will have nothing to worry about, i barely show up anymore lmfao.

-sammay

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Yesterday I went to PacSun with my friend. I walked into the back of the store, because the hoodies were marked down. As we were browsing, an employee walked past us and sort of stopped. We both looked at him. He went, "Hey!" in the friendlist voice. I was shocked by his charisma, really, I haven't seen anyone so gorgeous. I said "Hi!" back, and we both laughed like little kids. He asked me if I needed any help, and I asked him if he could find a medium for me. When it was time for me to buy it, he looked at me incredulously (but still friendly) and told me he'd hold it for me while I looked around more. I told him that was all I wanted and he kept insisting. Then, you know how you're staring at something so beautiful everything the person is saying is muffled? That's what happened, when I heard him say something about my face. I know it wasn't bad, because he smiled, almost flirtingly. I gave in and looked around more. When I went back, I said that was all I wanted, and he was like, "Are you sure? I mean It's not really the season for hoodies" Please note that when I was talking to him, I was beet red in the face and I was showing all signs of nervousness. He asked if I was alright about 5 times. He was like, "Is it something I did?" I thanked him and walked out of there. A few questions: Do you think he wanted me to stay because he wanted me to buy more, or stay longer because he was attracted? I never asked him his name, and I'm so desperate, I called Pacsun twice, then hung up because a girl picked up! I thought about him and regret how I never asked for his name..or age. I'm 14 years old. I hope to death he is young because If I ever hook up with him, I don't want it to be RAPE! I desperately need help. Pleaseeee. I will rate 5's.
Plus, what can I do when I go back to the store? I want to come back and say something, but I need suggestions. Thank you so much in advance. Sorry for the length.

id would go back and see if he is there, and if he is ask him how old he is and be like i thought i saw you before somewhere, and if he is waaaay older just be like wow. nevermind thought you were someone else, and look around for a couple mins and walk out, if he is around your age, 15-16- maybe 17 then be like hmm, sorry i guess i was wrong, whats your name? oh really. im not sure if your the guy, sorry for bugging you. and then look around the place and then be like you have a blah blah in my size? and be like okaaay thanks, and if he seems intrested be like do you want my number? and if he says no, be like okaaay thats fine thought id be nice but i guess not, i thought itd be cool being friends. if he says yes give it to him and be like call me sometime, and leave. itll keep him guessing.

-sammay

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What does it mean to be circumsized?

you know what its cool. you can keep the five =)

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what do girls look for in a guy, i think i know but i wanna know more! rate high!

Girls like guys

who make them laugh;

make them feel loved.

and just can be themselves.

like farting,burping that type of stuff.

without being immature going EWWW GROSS!

but be like SWEET lol, and try and fart better.

But i guess that just how me and my best friend leah are i guess.

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My boyfriend and I have been going out for half a year and I gave my virginity to him. He said that he was a virgin also. I feel that he was lying to me about being a virgin. I don't know what I should do to confront him with my thoughts. He seems to know too much about Sex to be a virgin.. I think he lied to me so I would sleep with him. How can I ask him about it without hurting his feelings?

Well alot of people didnt believe i was virgin, because they thought i was a slut. And a cock tease. It was because i didnt give em nothing, also because i knew alot about it too. Maybe, he has friends who have had sex and like he just seems like he just knows alot. If i were id be like "Hey hun, I have a question please tell me honestly and after this i wont bug you again... Were you really a virging before you had sex with me?" if he says no or yes you got your answer. But if he says "yes, i was" then be like "then how do you know so much as if your not a virgin" and then he will explain. In relationships its all about COMMUNICATING. You cant hate someone for asking a question, or trying to communicate.

-sammay

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so a little while ago was rapped..and i missed my period..im with the most amazing guy and if i tell him i know hes going to think im crazy (it was his best friend..who rapped me) and i dont know how to tell him..and i think im pregnat.my parents will kill me because they wont think i was rapped they'll think its an excuse BUT IM NOT LIEING!.but i cant be..im only 14..just turned 14 (the day i was rapped was my 14th bday..Jan 27th)

Hey Hun,

Im sorry about what happend to you. Im a Rape victim too. Im not a Teen Rape Advocate. If you think your pregnant tell your mom you were raped. Teens who rape teens need to be reported. My Commanding Officer in high school who was 18 and i was 16. Was my best friend. He raped me, I tried to keep it a secret. Yea that wasnt the best thing to do. He went free, but atleast i put up a fight. Guys who do that need a reality check because its not right. Your 14 and dont need to have a baby. If i were you go to www.plannedparenthood.com and schedule an apt. to see a gynocologist or a local clinic. Now and days all of this is classified. Its a new law, doesnt matter how old you are, then tell them you were raped and think you might be pregnant and once you tell them, everything will be okay. They will check to see if you didnt get any AIDS or STDS and give you a pregnancy test and if its positive they will give you an abortion pill. Unless you want to have the kid, then i would tell your parents you were raped and had nothing to do with it, tell them exactly what went down. I know its scary, i thought my parents were gunna blame me, and be mad. But trust me!! they know, it can happend. So tell them, once you do! you will feel much better. I Lost over a month of sleep because i didnt tell my mom, or dad. I slept for 2days str8 after i told my parents. The police came over, and they are very helpful. They ask you questions where it happend. You will never ever have to see him again. They will give you counseling and an advocate like me. If you want a advocate like me i will personally give you my cell number and i can help you through this. Its difficult i know. Trust me, i cant trust many men. I havent only been raped once, more then once and i have had friends raped and etc. I have been through it all dear, its scary. Please! I want to help you. Because i had to go through this alone, and it sucks. I would tell your boyfriend first, i told my boyfriend who was friends with him, and like he ended up punching him in the nose, but other then that he respected that i told him, and just be like "baby i love you so much" and then slowly let him know. he will be so proud you got the guts to tell him, and if he freaks out "which i doubt" then screw him! but the best thing to do is talk about to someone, someone who can help you, and your going to have to hurry, if you think your pregnant. Please leave me a message and i will personally give you my number. I will help through it all. I swear.

-Sammay

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today someone told me that she liked me. i kind of like her too, but her friends hate me. so should i ask her out? if i decide not to ask, then how do we keep things the way they were...(not weird/awkward)

well if i were you, id get her alone or send her a note asking to meet you sumwhere after school. Be like " I heard you had a crush on me? is that true. Its okay if you do." and if she goes "yes" then be like would you like to be my girlfriend? and just hope she says yes, and if she says no, ask her if its because her friends hate you. If thats the fact, then forget her! she aint the one for you. You deserve someone better.

-sammay

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hi im julie and im 13. Well you see there is this guy his name is anthony. I think he is just so hott!!!I just really want to go up to him and kiss him!!!But the thing is i want to know if he likes me. He is showing the signs like everytime i pass by him he smiles and immediately talks to his friend while still staring at me. Also a couple of times i seen him staring at my ass!!! Another sign is that everytime i talk to one of his friend he goes talk to them immdiately after, it is so weird.Also everyday in class he is always staring at me and when i stare at him he smiles and looks away. What is a way that i can show him that i like him? How can i flirt with him???help please!!!!
julie
p.s. I LOVE ANTHONY!!!

If i were you, id play the innocent little girl. Write him a note asking him what he's doing and if he wants to hang out someday and to write back. If he says "Yes i would" be like lets go to the movies this weekend, or the mall, or hang out at my house. or whatever. then when you get em alone, be a good girl make him laugh and be urself. let him know who you really are. You dont want to just like jump on him and start making out with him. Doesnt work that way. You have to slowly get up to that level. But who knows he might make the first move. But if he looks very interested you later on in the night, ask him what he thinks about you, if he says alot of good things. Be like do you have a crush on me? if he says yes. Be like i have a crush on you too. Then be like maybe we should hang more often. Then at school be like would you ever date a girl like me? and if he says yes, then be like then what you waiting for ask me out. boys love it when you suprise them like that. My boyfriends name is Anthony too. Its an Anthony thing. We started going out be me going "Yes Anthony i would love to go out with you" And he was like "Damn! howd you know, i was sitting here trying to figure out how to ask you! and like you just totally made it 100% easier" and then he was like "sam, will you go out with me?" and i was like "Of course:-p" hehe. See guys like it. Trust 100 percent garantee.

-Sammay

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Iam failing my nutrition and wellness class how can I bring my grade up?

well if i were you, i would ask your teacher if there is anyway you can bring it up. I know if you confront your teacher she will try her hardest to tell you what you need to do. Because, if you have the guts to go up there and ask, i think she will respect you and help you out. If all else fails. Work your ass off! and study study study. Or look online for clep notes, for summerazation. But if i were you id just read the book if you have one, over and over again and your homework and you should be good too go. Keep caffine in your system, and listen to some soothing music while trying to memorize something. helps me out alot!!!

Sammay

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ok i really like this boy and we've known each other through 3-8(were in eighth now) and he rly funny and nice and sometimes knows wat im thinking and i rly though about asking him out he knows that we flirt with each other its kinda obvesious and i was wondering if he feels the same way i feel about him? please help i rate high

hey,

i know exactly where this is going. i dated my bestfriend who i was totally flirty with. I asked him what he thought of me. Once he told me what i wanted to hear like good things saying im pretty or etc. Then ask him... So would you ever consider liking me? and if he says yea? then you should be like. Well do you like me as of this moment? and if he says yea. Then be like, wow! what a relief because i really like you. Then see what happends after that.

later love,
Sammay

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