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mikeyblue81Member Since:
October 19, 2004Answers:
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October 24, 2004Visitors:
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about
Well, I'm not an expert on anything, that's for damn sure. But, I've lived in 2 countries, 5 states (over a course of 12 different moves or so), traveled most of europe, gone to college, had good relationships and bad, experimented with drugs (I won't go into listing them all...), played in sports, bands, had all kinds of jobs, have seen all kinds of things. I guess what I'm trying to say, is that I've experienced my fair share, but I say that you can never experience enough! In any case, any advice I give is just my humble opinion. And you know what they say about opinions? They're just like bellybuttons... everyone's got one.What's that you say? Where did I get that sexy hat in my profile pic? It's from Afghanistan. That's right... the same place they make Afghanistanimation!
advice
I have a pretty hard life, it's not easy in this town. I always have alot on my mind, but since last year I've been counting on beer to clear my mind...I wanted to know why a little alcohol makes me think about nothing...even when I'm not drunk?
Alcohol, as with ANY other drug, alters your state of being, mind, conciousness, or whatever you want to call it. It's an escape. Drugs lower your inhibitions, they can release endorphins and seratonin, they can relax your body and all kinds of other things that take away they pain of everyday life. And, as long as there is pain, there will be drugs.
But, I digress. Alcohol allows you to relax, and get your mind off of things. And this in-and-of-itself isn't a bad thing. As long as you're responsible with it. Another one of my favorite sayings: 'Everything in moderation'. So, as long as you're doing it a safe and healthy ammount, it's my belief that almost anything, including most drugs, is ok to partake of. As long as the bill are paid, and you life at home, and your friends are taken care of, your time is your own to do with as you please, right?
It's when you start to make things, such as alcohol, a regular part of your life and other things, such as your family, or friends, or bills (or ANY responsibility for that matter) aren't getting taken care of-- that's when there is a problem. In this case, I'd recommend that you take a hard look at how this is affecting your life. Seriously, is everything getting taken care of? If not, look into getting some help. There's plenty of free help out there, tons of it is anonymous.
If it's all good... then, hey. Drink up. Be safe. Buy me a round ;)
ok this might be long but plz help...ok well this guy asked if i wanted to go to the movies with him and i said yes, but i thought we were goin as friends..then the next day my friend sent me a message and said congrats u goin out with *** i said what! were just gonna go to the movies...so then i texted ***** and i said u know were not goiun out,,@@@ said that we were, what diod u tell her, and he replied well she thought right i like u and i was gonna tell u when we got to the movies no matter what u were gonn a say, and he asked if i wanted to go out, i told hgim i dont really want a bf right now, sry, and then he got mad now he wont return my calls are answer my messages what do i do
Well, first off, don't get down on yourself because of this. It's not your fault. If he was asking you for anything more than a date, he should have made that clear to you. He was wrong for assuming that you were going to do, or say, or be anything. If he's mad about that then... well, it's his problem. He'll get over it. You did nothing wrong.
i like this girl. but she has a bf. i think she likes me. but im not sure., she told me im hot. i think she was kiding. so what sould i do.
thanks.... p.s. peace
She could very well like you, bro. But, here's the quick and dirty of it: she's taken, so forget about her. If she leaves him for you... well, think about it. That may not really be the kind of girl that you're looking for. What happens when the next better guy comes along, eh?
But, one has to ask: is her having a boyfriend makeing her exclusive? Or, is she just dating him? In the adult world of courtship, there are people who date, and those that have exclusive relationships. If someone is just dating, then, well, they can date anyone. If they are exclusive... well, you get the idea. It might be worth your while to find out which category she falls into.
ok well lately ive really had the urge to have sex. im a female and gonna be 15 soon and i know its too early but i dont know what to do. i dont even know how to have sex but ive been having dreams about it and everything. i dont want to be a slut! please help
Ok, well the most important thing to keep in mind and remember ALL THE TIME-- don't do anything until you are READY. Understand? Promise me. Regrets are no fun.
I'll let you in on a little secret, but you have to promise not to tell anyone, ok? I didn't have sex till I was 18 and already graduated highschool. Oh crap? This is public? Anyone can read it??
Big deal. I waited. But, that's not to say that I didn't do some experimenting. What I'd suggest for you, is experiment with your own body. Touching youself, masturbation, what have you. Just don't rush into anything that involves someone that you just plain don't know well enough.
hey well....my ex boyfriend and me were best friends b4 we went out...(the entire reason i didnt wanna date him) but now that we broke up after almost a year of dating every time i read something about relationships being torn apart i break down and cry...but now that he broke up with me ive started to cut myself and go into deep depressions...i want him bak bc when i was with him...there was never a time when i wasnt happy...he could make me smile no matter how sad i was...he might have made a few mistakes but so have i...i juss want him to b happy but i also juss want him to say that in order for him to b happy he needs to b with me...i also started smokking when he broke up with me...idk what to do...my life is going to hell since he broke up with me...idk waht to do...i want him bak but i want him to b happy...
signed ~*lost...
P.S.- y cant i b happy???
One of the hardest things in life to do is to let go of something you love. You feel like now you have this emptiness inside you that will just take you over if it isn't filled back in. You have to do something, but you don't know what. That's why you've turned to smoking and to hurting yourself. Sweetheart, I've been there. Let me tell you, it's not the way. I've been with friends that have been there. This is not the way.
One phrase that a very wise man told me when I was going through some tough times was 'This too... will pass'. What it means, is that this pain, this depression, this emptiness... all of these horrible things... they are temporary. It's agonizing, I know. But, there are certain things that you can't take back. Things that will become permanent scars. And not just from the cutting. Your heart can scar too. But that's just if you don't let it heal in the right way.
What you need to do, is surround yourself with people who care about you. Your family and friends. Talk to them, find a shoulder to cry on. Don't keep this all to yourself. Remember, 'this too, will pass'. No, not soon. It's going to hurt, probably for a long time. But don't go through it alone. You are allowed to grieve. And that's healthy, if you stay healthy doing it.
Try to remember the good things about the relationship. Embrace those good things. Don't let this pain turn into a resentment for you, or him. Yes, it's sad that it had to end, but, part of loving someone is doing what you need to do to let them be happy. So, be strong. I'm sure knowing that you were causing yourself harm wouldn't make him happy. Find someone you can talk to. Cry when you need to. Remember, this too, will pass. Things will get better.
hey mikey how comes your so good at giving advice ive been reading some of your answers you should have your own column in a magazine!
Hey, thanks a lot for the compliment! I guess I first started getting experience giving advice in highschool. I was the shy, nice kind of boy back then that always had friends that were girls, but never really that many girlfriends (thank heavens that I grew out of that!). Anyway, these girls would always come to me with thier guy problems. I just got really good at listening. If you listen enough to a person when they have a problem, they will usually tell you what they need to do. You just need to filter it out from what all they are putting out there. Other stuff just comes from life experience. And like I say, I've had my fair share.
As for getting my own column in a magazine... do you know anyone who's hiring? ;)
well the title pretty much says it all. My friend, we'll call him Pig Vomit, has always been screwing me over during the two years that I've known him. He's hit on girls that he knows I like which ends up with me not getting a chance, he's made out with a girl that I was with when she was piss drunk and he'd had one beer.
BUT! This is it. He's actually trying to get with my sister. She's two years younger than us, he stole her MSN address from mine and now he's been talking to her nonstop, going on webcam, and he's absolutely serious. They've tried to keep it a secret that he's doin it, but my other friend Cam has told me and I've seen my sister quickly closing her conversation windows with him when I come upstairs.
What do i do? I'm seriously thinking about hurting him. I've already talked to him about it, Cam has talked to him about it, hell Cam has told him that I plan to beat him to a pulp if he doesn't stop. I don't know what else there is to do.
Well bro, I feel you on this one. 'Bros before hoes'. I'm not implaying that you sister is a hoe in any way, shape, or form, but the saying holds true when it comes to your friends. Girls will come and go, but friends are lasting. To me, it sounds like this dude hasn't been much of a friend in the past. But... hitting on a friends sister? That a very sensitive area, especially if the brother doesn't approve. You've done the right thing in expressing your feelings and concerns to your 'friend', but have you talked to your sister yet? Have you let her know what kind of guy he is? If you can talk her out of the idea, then the problem has fixed itself. Likely though, it's not gonna be that easy. You've laid down the law, so to say, to your friend. I definately don't recommend violence, as it can bring in authorities, and you don't want that kind of thing involved. Shit like that stays with you. The best I can advise you to do, is just let them both know about how you feel about this situation. Let your 'friend' know that this is not some minor thing like the cockblocks he's given you in the past. This is family. Your family. And if things go poorly it'll affect your friendship. Then, like I say, do what you can for your sister. Don't force her one way or the other since it will just push her away, but instead let her know that you'll support her after their breakup when and probably it will happen.
Good luck...
someone told me that if water is cold it fastens up your metabolism more then warm water would, is that true? also what other things speed up your metabolisn..thank you
No, I don't think that water does anything for your metabolism, hot or cold. I'd suggest, not only excercise, but keeping an active lifestyle. Nothing better than sitting down in front of the tv or computer for a few hours to slow your body down ;)
yea this homeocming is late but this girl asked me to homecoming to her school and I like her...she just doesn't know...I got no idea what i should do for my homecoming and stuff and its this saturday so yea...
Well bro, if she's asking YOU to the dance, I bet there's a good possibility that she likes you too. Unfortunately my friend, when it comes to us guys and what we want in relationships, we're usually our own worst enemies. What I mean is, that if there is something we want (for instance getting this girl to fall for us) then we'll usually do all the wrong things to get it. So, when you go with her, just play it cool. Be nice, be flirty, but DON'T hang on her the whole night and DON'T smother her with too many compliments. Go out, meet people, dance with other girls, make it known that you're out to have a good time. Relax and end enjoy the fact that you having a fun time, and she'll have a good time too. Good luck!
What exercises can I do to tone my stomach as fast as possible?
Unlike other muscle groups in the body, the abdomen (abs) has the ability to repair itself faster and therefor can be worked everyday. Most other muscle groups you need to rest at least a day to get improvement from them. Anyway, just something to keep in mind for your excercise routine.
On to the excercises (more than just sit-ups!):
1) Crunches: on your back in the normal situp position, raise your feet off the floor till your thighs are pointing straight up. With your hands behind your head, 'crunch' up till your elbows touch your knees. You should be able to do a fair number of these, but remember that the focus of this excercise is on the upper portion of your abs, so that's where you want to squeeze when you come up.
2) Rocky/alternating situps: on your back, put your feet out on the floor so that your legs make a 90 degree angle at the knee (normal situp position). With you hands behind your head, lift yourself up but twisting your torso so that your right elbow comes up to meet your left knee. While you're at the top there, switch to your left elbow meeting your right knee, and keeping that torso twisted position, lower yourself back down to how you started. Come back up like you just came down (left elbow meeting right knee), switch again, and lower down, again keeping the torso twisted will you get back to the start position. This is a great excercise since it works all parts of your abs including the muscles on the outer edges (the obliques) around your ribs and helps give a trim, chisled appearance.
3) Leg lifts: this one is a bit of a challenge if you don't have someone to assist you. If you can't find someone to help out, I'm sure you can find a creative alternative like a bed leg or tree or something else that won't move easily that you can hold on to. So, first you'll need your partner (or tree... whatever) to stand shoulder width apart. You then lay on the ground, head between thier feet, hands grasping thier ankles or calves for support. Then, keeping your body and legs straight, lift your legs up until your whole body is in an 'L' shape. Lower your legs until they are just a few inches off the ground and lift again. I like this excercise as it focuses on the lower region of your abs, but is a good ab workout overall as well.
My main philosophy with abs workouts is to do as many of each excercise as you can. But, if you're just starting out, I'd suggest taking things slow otherwise you'll be pretty sore and have a hard time getting around ;) A good starting set would be something like this:
30 rocky/atlernating situps
15 leg lifts
50 crunches
Good luck, and feel free to IM or send a message if you have any other questions.
Hi there, I'm a 15 year old girl falling for a guy... I met him over the summer on the Internet (we go to the same school but never met before) and I fell for him fast. He's basically all I could ever ask for in a guy. We talk constantly all the time on the Internet, but at school he is very shy around me. I'm not a very shy person, so I try to talk to him as much as possible. On the Internet, we talk like we're best friends. But at school he acts sort of mean to me (I think he is just kidding and just tries to act 'cool' in front of his friends :P) But yeah, I can tell that he never really means it to act that way around me because he always glances at me and smiles :) Is this a sign that he could like me? Please help!!! Thanks so much
Yeah, I'm sure he likes you. He just doesn't know how to be comfortable with himself while being with you around his friends. This is an issue, but mainly for him. If he can't get over it (and it's NOT gonna be a quick change, mind you), but you like him still... remove him from the situation. Go to the mall or the movies or whatever and get him more comfortable being around you, but without his friends. Keep talking with him on the net. Get him comfortable with the idea that at least he has a girl that likes him (unlike his loser friends... (well... don't call them loser friends to his face :p) ... otherwise they would have girls hanging around with them too, right?). Anyway, just remember, if it doesn't work out, it's not the end of the world.
--As an afterthought: maybe he's just not that used to you being around him. You may want to take a small step back and approach him less often. Change affects people in different ways, and may just be him not knowing how to deal with all the attention. Give him a little space, and he'll probably come around ;)
Good luck!
I am really sick and tired being made fun off when I talk because of my accent. I always feel as if I can stand up for myself, that is until I face the problem. I am cool with most people or so, but i feel as if i need to find this one friend i can share everything with. But there is no one who I truly trust. I try to talk with my mom but she nevers sees my point. Sometimes I am just afraid to tell her somethings because of her way of taking things to seriously. So I try to talk to god it helps but I still feel as if I need let it all out to someone physically. I try to be true to myself but sometimes that gets hard especially being a freshmen. I am afraid to go and find a guy because i don't like rejection. I feel as if I just can not be myself infront of my peers. Even though I am very outgoing and I never get boring.
If anyone has any advice or suggestions on how to feel confident around my peers despite the way I talk, or how to stop myself from always feeling rejected, please say so.
P.S. I tried writing, it doesn't help.
Most people have one thing or another about themselves that they are self-concious of. Thier looks, thier family background, thier education or job, or in your case, your accent. What you need to do, is sit down and have a little one on one with yourself. Your voice is part of who you are. Be comfortable with it. If people decide to make fun for it, well that's thier problem. It's something that makes you unique. People may tease you now, but later on in life it'll be something that people will notice in a good way. It makes you stand out as an individual. Good luck!
Ok I just got over this relationship from an online girl. We were together 5 months but she held so many lies to me and I never saw her. She lived like 4.5 hours away from me tho. But here is the question. I meet this other girl and she likes me and I like her. She lives in the same state and pretty close. How should I go about this without getting hurt again? I would love to be with her but just am scared i'll be hurt. Please help all that can. Thanks Much
OK bro, I feel your pain. I've been doing the internet dating thing a while due to my separation from available sociable females and have had varying degrees of success. ANYWAY, here's a couple tips for you to protect yourself with the process:
1) Pictures, pictures, pictures! One of the main ways a girl will 'deceive' you is by posting a picture in her profile that is old, not of her, or in some other way not accurate about her actual appearance. So, once you initiate contact, get her to send you some additional pictures. Want to be sure that it's her in the pictures? Ask he to take a picture of herself holding a sign or something with your name on it. If you get any fishy feelings, just drop it and move on to the next one.
2) Question her. The wonderful (and sometimes scary) thing about the internet is the ability to create your own identity. People only know what you tell them. Ask youself, does this sound too good to be true? It might not be, but find out. Ask questions about things in her profile. See if her story adds up. Remember, you know who you are, and you're not the psycho, you need to figure out if she is ;) And again, if it doesn't feel right, move on to the next.
But, you're already setting yourself up for failure if you're scared. If you're interested, send me an e-mail or IM and I'll point you in the direction of someone that helped me not only with women but with my own personal confidence issues. And confidence my friend, is what really attracts the women you want.
Good luck!
My question is I have know this guy for almost fifteen years. We have known each other since the third grade and the whole time I have known him I like more then just a friend. We used to be good friends but in eighth grade he asked me if I wanted to have sex with him and when he asked me I didn't say anything. But after that day we weren't good of friends like we were before because I didn't know how to act around him. But in high school I noticed that he still likes me because I use to catch him looking at me and smiling and sometimes we would smile when ever we looked at each other because we always had a class together through high school. When we graduated he wrote something really nice but the thing is I don't know if he is the type of guy to write the same thing in every girls yearbook or if he just did it in mine. But to this day I don't know if he wants to be more then friends or not. But I found out that he hoined the army and I am thinking of writing him a letter but I am not sure because we haven't keep in touch in almost four years so what should I do.
I'd say definately go ahead and write him. I'm actually in a very similar situation myself with and old girlfriend from highschool that I just recently looked up after nearly 5 years of no communications. There won't be anything happening between us (she's now happily married with 2 beautiful kids), but it's great being able to catch up with old friends. The army is a rough place frequently, and getting a great letter from an old friend can make your whole week better (believe me, I know... I'm a soldier myself). So yeah, even if all that comes of it is that you get to have a few laughs reminiscing about good times in highschool, I think it's still time well spent.
Ok. I am having what I think is a morale problem. I am the lowest man on the totem pole at work, hence I get all the crap. I have to keep up with where my coworkers are if I want them to help me. All of the extraneous stuff falls on me. Our schedule is so tight for the next two weeks that I am only getting one day off a week. The good news is that I am getting overtime pay. So now every little challenge that comes across my desk other than what is scheduled is driving me nuts. I can't talk to my boss without being argumentative. I bitch and moan every day. I do like my job most days, but it hasn't been fun lately. I know its a job, but do I have to make myself miserable? What are some techniques on making work easier with the knowledge is the only thing that is constant is change? And there are like 26 million I's in the question, how do I turn my focus outward?
Well guy, the best I can tell you is to just suck it up. If this schedual is just for the next 2 only, man... you have it good. Plus, you say that you like your job right? So stick it out, and better things will come. Still not feeling better? Ok, well lets put it this way- at least you're getting days off! It's not like my job- we don't get to take 'days off' from fighting wars. A motto I like to use when things are rough: 'This too, will pass'. Keep your chin up.
I'm in love with a guy that has girls practically begging for him. He says he likes me too and I write him love notes EvErYdAy..but of course the typical flirty african american popular boy never writes back..and he always flirts with me and we act like a couple. i really like him and he says he really likes me too, i always ask him-"why aren`t we a couple" but its always the same answer...that "he`z been in love before and the girl cheated on him and now he can`t really trust" or "he got too many things on his mind" yet..we hang out and act like we're married or somethinq. I mean-i just wanna wake up every morninq knowing that he`z mine...what should i say to him? i`ve already told him how i feel
If you really want to get this guy then you need to back off. Seriously, if you're writing him love notes already, EvErYdAy... you're giving him too much attention. If you want to grab his attention and MAKE HIM take notice, keep flirting with him for sure... but you need to play a little 'harder-to-get'. Let him know that other guys have been asking you out... certainly don't write him so much unless you're getting the kind of feedback you want from him. Give him the impression that HE would be lucky to date YOU and you'll probably notice a change in his behavior. Give him space and time to start missing you, and he'll start coming to you. Don't make it too easy for him. Personally, I can't stand to be with a girl if she's not a challenge at least some of the time. I think a lot of guys out there would agree. And I'm sure that you don't want to be considered 'easy' either, by anyone's standards.
I recently had sex for the first time (about a month ago) and since then I've needed to pee an unusual amount. And when I do pee, it can really hurt. I now have trouble controlling when I need to pee too. Like, the second I get home from school I have to run to the toilet or I'll like pee myself. It's so embarrassing. The other night I even peed while in bed and got really freaked out. WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?!
Sounds like you could have a urinary tract infection. It's not altogether uncommon after having sex, especially for females. These infections can get serious and if you're not feeling better soon, you really should get yourself checked out by a doc.