about

my advice-based life basically started when i was sent to a set of seminars to modify my behavior(i was being a rude kid). there i learned how to help myself out with alternatives to being rude, and how to give others really good advice. i have bipolar and acouple other disorders which are all under control, so don't worry. but if anyone has any problems like that, i can answer alot of questions on that subject. i'm really good at answering any questions i know things about. i don't know much about Mac products, but i'm pretty good at computers. i also enjoy just chatting, so if you want my email address, just ask me for it. i hope to meet some people here and become friends with them. i guess that's it, hope i can help anyone who calls on me with a question. feel free to ask me anything you want and i'll answer to the best of my ability!!
:}

advice

I met my boyfriend when he was a senior at my school. I was just a freshman. He has graduated now and is going to college in the fall. I love him and he tells me that he loves me. He says that he isn't going to dump me when he goes to college because he thinks I am his soul mate. I want to believe him but my friends and my mom all tell me that guys are all the same and he will party and cheat on me. He is such a great and nice guy. I don't know what to believe. I need advice!

well, since i don't know the guy, i can't simply tell you the answer, but i honestly think that if HE thinks you are his soulmate, then he wouldn't do anything to jeopardize that. i would tend to believe him since he hasn't done anything to make you not believe him. and if he can, make sure he visits you so you don't grow apart. that's all i can say, i hope i did come as some help, if not, i'm sorry. this is an incredibly hard subject to give advice on, but i did my best :)

[view]

I am a thirteen year old female and I have a close male friend who is also thirteen. We are very good friends but we don't have any type of sexual relationship at all. Today we were having a discussion about soul mates and I decided that I think that he might be my soul mate, as in a friend not a lover. My question is, do you think it is possible to find your soul mate at thirteen? We are really good friends, I tell him everything and we are always together.

well, TECHNICALLY, it can be possible, but i honestly thing that you're soulmate is a little bit farther down your life line than that. but you'll find them in the next few years. hope i helped,
Kat

[view]

I was invited to a black tie event for the first time my escort is wearing black and white so what should i wear im 5'5 132 pounds should i go with a short dress or long one please help.

wear whatever you feel comfortable in....if you see something you like in the store window, then go ahead and use it, don't worry so much ^_^
Kat

[view]

About a month or so ago, i saw this show degrassi. There was a girl named elli and she cut herself. Ever since i saw that one episode my life has been gettin worse and worse. My bf dumped me for another girl. My best friends dont ever want to do anything with me, and the guy that has liked me for 3 years hates me now. and well...i started to cut. It really relieve my pain and helps me get things out. But recently my friend say my arms and legs in gym and shes going to tell a counciler. i mean, i dont want her to!! i know its gotten really far..and its really hard to stop i've tried everythign! i've tried hiding my scissors and puttin a rubber band on my wrist NOTHING works!! I NEED HELP! what should i do? if my parents find out they might send me to a mental hospital!!

-hurt and scared

you probably don't want to listen to this, but the best thing to do if you can't stop yourself is to tell someone, like a counselor or a parent. if you talk to them honestly and calmly and tell them you want to be able to stop without being sent to a mental hospital, they will probably do whatever they can to help you. it won't be an easy road, but you will have to start being open about your feelings and how everything has been affecting you. please, i encourage you to get some help, and just start trying to be happy again, it will come. if you need anything, email me, Metalkat86@hotmail.com
i'll be glad to help.
Kat

[view]

My parents got divorced and i'v been living with my mom, brother, and step-dad for over a year. I feel really bad for my dad because he lives alone and seems lonley. I think he should get a pet too bt he works and say`s he wouldn`t be able to take care of it and stuff. I think i want to live with my dad, but if i do i know my mom will cry and get alll upset.. :/ what should i do or say?! Plez help

i sorta have the same situation. granted this was set up by the state, but what i did was i talked to my dad every weekend, adn i saw him during the summer (cuz we lived in different states) and then i alternated christmases and thanksgivings with him. but if he lives closer, then i think you should try to visit him at least every other week or something, maybe call him every night to say goodnight. and about the whole pet thing, if he works more than a nine to five job, then it wouldn't be a good thing, but if not, as long as he took him out before he left and as soon as he got home, it would be fine, and also leave food in the cage for it. yeah.....i'd love to help more if you need it, email me at metalkat86@hotmail.com. hope i helped,
Kat

[view]

I'm a 16 year old girl, and I don't shave my legs or armpits on any regular basis. I'll do them for special occassions or if I'm wearing a special outfit, but most of the time the hair just doesn't bother me so I don't bother removing it. I figure that it's my body, and my time and energy that I'm saving by not shaving, but sometimes I worry that guys won't be interested in me because of this and I've got to the age where I wish guys expressed more interest in me. Should I start shaving, or should I just wait for a guy who doesn't mind me being me?

well, shaving isn't just about you being you, it's also hygiene. girls are supposed to start shaving around your age because of hygiene issues, so honestly, i would start shaving. i used to not shave, but i was told then to start shaving because it could give me some problems with my skin if i didn't. hope i helped.

[view]

This os for health, no, really it is. Why is it okay for adults to have sex, and not for teenagers, or, at least, older teens, say 16-18? If they both know the risks, and both could get pregnant and/or diseases?

for the 16 and 17 yr olds, it's because it's still illegal, and if you get caught, it could mean a charge of satitory rape for the guy. thats why.

[view]

in two weeks im going to florida and we'll be gone for 17 days. I have a cat and i was thinking about asking a friend to come by and take care of him. (for money of course) I was wondering would the cat get too lonely being that we wont be around for so long and my friend will only be in the house for five minutes to feed him and change his litter box? Another option is the kennel..but i hear they are very expensive. Do you know about how expensive they are? Should i have my friend come by or take my cat to a kennel? Thanks and i'll rate you guys because i appreciate your time and advice..i too am a columnist. Thanks again..
-melissa-

well, it all depends on what kennel you use. you can even keep them at some vets offices. when i used to keep my dog at kennels, it was like $25 a day(i think....this was a LOOONG time ago) but my best advice to you is to call around to find out :) and also, ask your friend if he/she could stay for a bit longer than to simply change the litter and feed him. see if they'll play with the cat for a while, that way it won't get too lonely. as long as you trust the person and you know that it will be in good hands, i don't see anything wrong with it....my dad has three cats, so i know where you're coming from. just call around, and if it will be cheaper to kennel it, then do so, if not, talk to your friend and have him/her take some time to keep the cat company sometimes. it should be fine. hope i helped,
Later,
Kat

[view]

ok is it weird for girls to bite guys lips? cuz usually guys bite mine but iv never bitten theirs... and what about running my tongue across my bfs teeth when were making out? my firend told me thats good but i dont know... please help ill rate hi and if u guys have any other ideas please tell me!

just kiss, don't think about it so much. yeah, it's fine for biting to occur, just let your lips do the driving, if you don't feel comfortable doing it, don't.
Later,
Kat

[view]

ya i know this is such a lovely question.. but i need help. i get these little arm pimples.. i don't know if they're actually pimples but they're little zitlike things and white puss comes out of it.. what are these? where did they come from? and i have scars from them.. how can i get them to go away?

and back acne.. i have scars from that too, and i get all these pimples on my shoulder, i can't get them to go away and the scars too? any good meds you can reccommend? please help me !

i don't know of any meds , sorry, but those little arm pimples are called bacteria marks. i have them too, and DON'T POP THEM because they will leave marks, especially since they fill up more than once, they'll end up scarring. i know it's for faces, but i use Clearasil Ultra, and it gets rid of zits in like 3 days. it may work on other areas of the body, go ahead and give it a try. hope i helped,
later,
Kat

[view]

i started likeing on of my friends and he's 17. Im only 13. He's really sweet and he REALLY isnt a bad person. when im around him, when i talked to him, even if i hear his voice i just smile the biggest smile. I talk to him almost every night on the phone and we text each other constintly through out the day. he said he likes me and i like him also. Some of my guy friends said that they dont want me to get hurt. they dont know him. They said that 13 and 17 is a very big age diffrence, but i really like him alot. He just makes me happy and for awhile i haven't been happy. Do you think that i should continue to like him? and do you think that if he was to ask me out should i go out with him? please tell me what to do im so confused

it's okay to like someone 4 years older than you. granted it's a different generation, but both my grandparents are five or more years difference in age. and i know some people who are a few years in age different. it's not a bad thing. it may seem so right now because you are still in middle school (or just starting high school?) and he is almost done, but once you both finish school, it will seem like less of a bad thing. don't worry about it. if you like him and he likes you back, i say just let it pan out and see what happens. if it's meant to be, then it will be ♥ later,
♥ Kat ♥

[view]

HEEEEEEEELP!!!!!PLEASE!!!!!
ok ok....i submitted a question about my bestfriend that i made out with and that i have gone out with a million times...blah blah blah well after i did that he asked my out on halloween and we ahve been going out for 3 months now...but i got kicked out of my private school and im goin back to public school w/him and he thinks that i will dump him now becuase i will just go out with sumone eles and the only reason i have been going out with him this long is becuase i didnt have anyone to go out w/ at my old school and he almost started crying...i told him he was CRAZII and that i love him more than anything...but i dont rele trust myself i mean i know i love him but... i have already talked to a few of my ex boyfriends and i already know that i am gunna have to fiight to b able to turn them down becuase one of them already asked me to...does that mean i dont love my boyfriend????

no, it doesn't mean you don't love him, it just means you're a normal teenager. everyone really wants to be loved by some prince charming type person at this age(i should know, i do too) and it doesn't mean you don't love whoever you're with any less, it just means that you are very loving. it is all on you, though, which one of them will give you the best life while you go out with them? if it is your boyfriend, then stay with him, it is one of exes, then go with them. but don't make the choice for anyone else but yourself, you are the most important person in your life. don't stay with your boyfriend only because you don't want to hurt his feelings, if he isn't the one you want to be with, don't stay with him if you don't want to hope i helped. later,
Kat

[view]

hi, i dont know if anyone remembers this but i wrote a little while back about a friend whos father had brain cancer, and he had a major surgery on the 1st day of school (september 2nd or so), the doctors werent sure if he would surive or not, my friend wasnt sure what to do. whether to go with his parents or go to school, because he hates to see his father in the hospital and all. so he came to me the night before. I told him no matter what he does his father will always love him and always be proud of him. he told me that i was scaring him like his father was, since right before i said that so did his father. I said i was sry and ill always support in anything. I know they went on vaca the week be4 so he got to spend time with him. then he had his 14th birthday in november. christmas and the new year. yeah well on monday my friend whos his gf said he wouldnt be in all week and she wouldnt say why and well last night my other friend asked me if i heard wat happened to him. i said no and that all i knew was that he wasnt gonna be in school all we, it turns out this pasted sunday his father had pasted :'-(. I dont know wat to do or how to support him, when he comes back to school next week. please help

just be there for him....losing a loved one, especially one of your parents, is a really hard thing. he'll need all the support he can get. all you need to do is let him know that you are there for him. don't smother him because that won't help, just be there if he needs someone to talk to. hope i helped, later,
Kat

[view]

i am in love with a guy. but the thing is, is that our families hate each other and ownt let us see each other anymore. but i love him so much and i think that because we cant spend time togther that he is losing feelings for me!!! i cry in my room every night praying that we will be together some day....and it seems like no matter how hard i try to make things work or find some way to see him....it just isnt good enough....so i guess my real thing that i need advice with is that.....im in love....im not sure if he is in love with me.....we cant see each other....do i let him go or keep trying to make it work? please people...i need help!!!

i know exactly what you feel like. my family hates my bf. if your not sure if he loves you, don't make yourself wait til he does. email me if you need any more advice: metalkat86@hotmail.com
i'm in a bad mood right now, sry if this isn't the best....but i can give really good advice, so if you wanna, email me and i'll give it to ya. later,
kat♥

[view]

hey this is for mainly guys unless there are any girls out there who play football- but i reallyyyyy love football and i am a girl and i want to be a coach someday- what do you think? could that ever happen?

well, i think so, there is a women's pro football league. and i played football in 8th grade on the boys team, so it's entirely possible.later,
Kat

[view]

I have this friend,we'll call her "Nicole" and we've been like best friends since 5th grade and we were like inseperable,if she wasnt with me something was wrong, and this year we just started high school and at the beginning of the year I liked this guy, then somehow she ended up liking him AND even dating him. Well,ok, I have liked this guy, "Lee" from the BEGINNING OF 8TH GRADE YEAR before any of my friends even knew them. I think 1 of my friends was with me but that one was "Jess". So only "Jess" knew what "Lee" looked like. So like all summer before we started 9th, "Lee" was ALL I talked about, and then we started school and all my friends thought he was the hottest thing that walked on this Earth. So I like "Lee", pretty much EVERYONE knows it, even he does. Well I think "Nicole" likes him but she says she just acts like it to make me mad, I dont think shes acting, I honestly think she likes him. And it pisses me off cause they BOTH know I like "Lee" everyone does. What should I do about this cause it pisses me off that she likes him. And if they go out I dont know what the hell I'm going to do.

goodness, you are in a pickle!! if you like him so much, i suggest that you go stand up for yourself and ask him if he'd like to go out sometime. i've had similar problems before, and the only way i could make the other girls back off wat to go after what i wanted myself, to show them that they weren't going to scare me out of liking him. it may take a while, but you should work yourself up to asking him out, that's probably the only way you'll get them off your back. if this didn't help, email me: metalkat86@htomail.com. if it did, glad i could help. i hope i hear from you soon, cuz i'd like to help you solve this. later,
Kat

[view]

Hey it's me again the 14/f that is pregnate..For those of you that don't remember or know me, I had a boyfriend in jail and the side relationship where I got pregnate and found out from a test. Pierre is his name..not mike..but anyway pierre wants this baby aborted..he said he's not going to lose his football career over me or the baby..i`m already 6 weeks and I love this baby more than anything now. Telling my boyfriend was hard.. even harder then telling my father! My boyfriend was really mad since he just got out of jail and everything and wanted to kill the crap out of pierre..well my boyfriend really loves me and you can tell..since he said he'll be the father since pierre won't....but what should i do..should i still consider abortion? because I really want this child...

well, i think your mom has the right idea. and if your mom is going to support you and Mike is willing to be the father figure, then more power to ya. while it will be hard having a baby at 14, with all the support you say you have, i don't think it will be as hard as if, say, no one supported you and your parents kicked you out. so go ahead and have the kid. i know that you will probably make a great mother. go ahead and email me, my addy's metalkat86@hotmail.com i hope to hear from you soon, and i'd love pictures when the little one's born. i'm always here to help and feel free to come to me with any problems. btw, my mom's "shelbyjune" and she answered this question, too, so we are both able to help if you need it. later,
Kat

[view]

See, I think I have OCD, and it really bugs me. It's starting to interfere with alot of things. Like when I pray at night, I feel the need to repeat some lines several times, and I always have to have my TV remote facing a certain way exactly, and all this other stuff, it's really bugging me, I have talked to my parents about it before but they don't really seem to get how much it interferes with my life, because most of the stuff I do is behind their back, like rearranging stuff and whatnot...

What I want to know is do any of you have OCD and what are some of your symptoms (if you feel comfortable sharing)? And where did you go to get tested for it, if you're undergoing treatment what kind and is it helping? Thanks so much if you help, I will rate if it's good advice!

Thx

okay, i have OCD, and what i usually do when not on medication is i count. i count my number of steps from one room to another, i make sure i step only in the squares of a tiled floor, not on the lines. i also have to make sure it is even numbers. sometimes, i have to have two pieces of candy instead of one, for example. i was diagnosed with it(i'm sorry i can't give you more info on how i got diagnosed) and now i take a drug called Lexapro that helps control my need to do things in such order. also, it takes a certain amount of self control, you have to want to be able to change it, otherwise it will completely take over your life, and i already know you don't want that. if you ever have anymore questions, my email address is on my advice column, so feel free to email me whenever you want. i'm always here to help and listen to any problems you have. i'll even be here every step of the way if need be. hope i helped, and i'll hear from you soon, later,
Kat

[view]

What does "shanking" mean?

shanking is when someone in prison makes a shank(something sharp that can be used like a knife) and uses it on another person. for example, let's say bob and bill are prisoners. bob makes a shank and "shanks" bill. bill dies because he was shanked (or stabbed) with the thing he made. that's all hope i helped. later,
Kat

[view]

I am 14/f and don't tell me i`ve made the biggest mistake of my life...i know i've made a mistake and i`m gonna follow my responsibilities. My boyfriend, who I have been with for 11 months, has been in jail for 6... he just got out and we really like each other you know? Well, while he was in jail-i had a little side thing...with a 16 year old black male...lets call him mike..me and mike really liked each other and did it a lot..but when we did it on the first day of my period-something happened. Last night, my stomach was hurting sooo bad while talking to my boyfriend. So bad that my mom took me to the emergency room. She decided to give me a pregnancy test..and it`s positive. I`m nervous and all and 6 weeks pregnate in the 9th grade... I have the money and skills to support it..but MIKE doesn`t want anything to do with it. My dad wants it aborted but I want it...my mom does too. What would you do in my situation? And how do i explain to my boyfriend who is trying to get his life back on track?

well, you may want it, and i understand that. but make sure you consider what that entails. if you keep it, will you be able to go to college(i know it's kinda far off, but u still gotta think about it.)you'll have a 5-6 year old kid. it all depends on what you want to do with your life and how supportive your family is willing to be. if they will take care of it so you don't have to worry so much in college(or high school) then go ahead. the choice is yours and yours alone, i can only give advice, it's on you what you decide to do. my personal opinion is to side with your dad. as painful and mentally damaging as it will be, i really think that no one under 18 should have to deal with raising their own child. it's hard and it is unfortunately detrimental to alot of aspects in your life. you COULD get scholarship money for having it in college, but idk. it's your choice and i hope i helped. Metalkat86@hotmail.com. update me, i would really like to know how your situation turns out, and i'll be here to help you every step of the way if need be. be strong and follow your heart,
Kat

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker