about

I am a very hard worker. I am studing to become a Psychologist . I am very good at giving advice. I specialize in relationships but i will answer just about anything. Do you need advice or help with a problem then i am here to help you. My column is for everyone young and old. It will be a place to express to me what you feel. If i have learned one thing, it is that you can deal better with a problem by telling someone about it and getting their imput. Never be embarrased you have nothin to loose with my column. I hope you all feel comfortable. I am here just to provide help and advice.

Tell me your problem!

advice

Ok so I was going out with this sweet,hot,nice boy named Dalton.Our longest time was one week but i told him I loved him and he told me he loved me.So this other chick named Rachelle liked him and they had dated before.She said something to him and we broke up. I cryed my slef to sleep for 2 weeks streght but now hes going out with her. I cant stop thinking about him and hes in my dreams.I cant tell him I still in love and my bff is bffs with him.He kinda flrits with me and pushes me over and wont look at me in hall way unless i laugh and im not looking at him.What i wanna know is if it is over and should i move on???

You should move on. He has another girl and if he really cares about you the way that it sounds like then he would have never broken up with you. If he comes back to you then make him realize the pain that he put you thru. You need to stop living in the past and find a new man that cares about you and only you. When the right man comes along that you would really cry over and miss; he won't leave you. Just remember that you do have friends to back you up and thats what they are there for. I hope that this helps make up your mind
Good Luck!!!
Advice For Teens

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Okay, well I am in 6th grade. Me and my best friend have been soo close through elementary school and are families are so close and we even own a beach house togehter. Well, see Through out this month we have started to grow apart. She is trying to be like her older sister (preppiesh) and like that but before she started wanting to be like her older sister she hated the way preps were and that they were retarted and stuff. Well, now she has become a prep and is being someone she isn't. She used to hate this one prep and now she is like trying to be her closet friend. I hate the way she is being. I am hopeing it is just a phase but if it isn't I think we will be spilt up and stuff. I wish I could tell her this but since we are growing apart I don't know what to do. I used do everything to be her best friend because she wanted to end the friendship but now it's different I don't know if I would really care to not be her best friend. I have a boyfriend and since this one night I haven't told her really much about him. I don't know why I want to but then there is something stopping me. I need help. She thinks I don't trust her anymore but I don't know if that is true or not?? Please help!

It sounds like a phase to me. But like you said you never know. I would try talkin to her. But start out with.. Hey I just wanted to ask you if you think that you have changed at all... if she says no then start askin her who she thinks is her best friend, and have her stores that she buys her clothes at changed. Try to show her that things are not right. Also, just wait til next year in midde school everything changes. litterally EVERYTHING.. people split off into so amny groups and other schools come together. Just keep a place for her there and if she ever comes cryin back make sure that you tell her you arent goin to be there for her unless she can say she wont walk out on you like she did here. Good luck
If she says anything just tell her " some people come into your life and walk back out with no effect; others come into your life and leave footprints on your heart" Ask her what she thinks your shoe size is because most likely you left footprints.

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okay.... i really like this kid... but he has no idea, and ii dont kno what to do... he just broke up with his girlfriend..((a couple of months ago)) and is finally free.lOl soo what should ii do?? ii really like him!!!ii also talk to him on AIM... but ii dont kno what to say to him..pleaze help me with that 2!


lOve...
troubled love life

Try talkin to him in the hallway. Be brave. Guys like to see confidense in a girl. Be happy be flirty, wear really hott clothes show off some curves. And of all things be yourself, guys dont like fakes. Really get to kno him and get comfy with him. maybe go to a group movie with all of your friends. see if he has any interest. if you think that he has some. ask him if he likes anyone. if he says yea pull out the yearbook and start naming them.. lol.. Good luck. hope you get that man.

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Ok, where to start? I'm a freshman in high-school, and I totally hate high-school. I mean, its not THAT bad, but I'd prefer middle school, anyday. Last year, (in 8th grade) I had it all. Great friends, boyfriends, pretty decent grades, and everybody liked me pretty much. I was Ms. Perfect, and I was supposedly SUPER-HOT, or so everybody said. Now, I feel like crap. I'm always trying to be someone I'm not. My best friend moved away, far and we barely ever keep it contact. My other best friend, well we don't even ever hang out because I ditched her for my current best friend, and so now she had better friends, and I'm just a nobody. And my new best friend, well we've only been friends for about a year, not entirely, but the fights we get into, its unbelievable. I haven't fought like I gought with her, with my other friends for two years. I mean, she's a good friend, but gets pissed easily, I mean we're two different people, I've talked to her about it before, but ehh. I don't know what to do. Now, guys. Yeah, people still like me, but not as much. There's lots more prettier girls! And life, my social life is horrible, my parents don't let me do shit. Guys, I've had two big crushes that both liked me but things got screwed up because I was too shy. I know how people say, that if you're popular and stuff in middle school, in high school you won't be, and vice-versa. I don't know what to do about ALL of this. Please help with everyhting, get my life back o track anfd better., Thanks os much!

Try to make the best out of it. People are naturally drawn towards energetic and happy people. Put on a happy face and smile. If you have been tryin to be someone that you dont want to be then girl be yourself. That is the only way that you are going to make it through high school. Yea, it is gonna be hard but if you dont be your self then you will get a rep that you dont want. No matter what your type surround yourself with all types of people. Try makin new friends. You are gonna have to be brave. If someone is talkin trash let it go. It doesnt matter. Make it look like you are havina great life. Take a lil more time to work on the grades then your parents may become a little less controling. If that happens you will have more freedom. Maybe try being friends with alot of guys instead of having one boo. Hope everything works out. Just try some things you may be suprised with the result. Good luck.

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I think I'm kind of short.. I'm 13 and just a little over 5 feet.. are there any ways that can help me grow taller?

You are really lucky I am 18 and I am not even
5'2'' so be happy. There I hope that makes you feel better.

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well this guy I have been good freinds with for a long time. And I like him, and a while back he liked me too. But that;s been put on hold because he's going out with this other girl... anyway, lately he has been walking away when I talk to him and it seems like he's pretending I'm not there, or he justdoesn't want me there. it hurts because I really like him and I miss the friends thing. What should I do?

Get your nerve up girl.. you gotta ask him what is wrong. Ask him if he stills wants to be your friend. Or the next time that you are talking to him ask him to repeat the last 5 things that you said. And make it really simple like walk up and say hey whats up with you today if he cant remember the way that you greeted him then there is somethin wrong with him. Ask him if he still wants to be friends and really start talkin to him again. Hope that helps Good luck

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Does anyone here know of some good makeup supplies that you may have used and thought looked really good on you?

Cover girl powder foundation is awesome. Also physicians formula blemish concealer. It has a green side and a beige- light colored side and it will make your face look so awesome. I loooooove Cliniques lipgloss it is so awesome and you can match just about any color shirt with the lip gloss. It is a little more expensive but trust me it is so worth it. If you have brown eyes then liquid eye shadow looks really good but it does make a statement. So you may have to be brave to try it. Good luck

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Anyone know of any good jobs for a 13 year old to earn money other than helping neighbors or a lemonade stand?

You know this wont earn you money but in the future it could get you a paying postion. Try volunteering. It can get you scholarships and a good word in. Then when you are ready to apply for a job you can put down work experience. At age 15 your local Dairy Queen may hire you. Wish you luck. This may be helping out your neighbors but try babysitting. Get the word out make flyers and but them in mailboxes. Try the flyer thing in a local neighborhood, these people usually have children. also your local hospital caould provide a CPR class and that would look really good on your flyer that you are CPR qualifyed and that you have taken a babysitting class. Hope this helps

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Alright, I'm letting you all know right now this is going to be lengthy. Over a year ago, I was dating this guy and we broke up after 4 months of dating because of problems and whatnot. I found out after we broke up that he was doing so many things behind my back like smoking pot (I'm disgusted by that) having sex with other girls, touching other girls at school, etc. We broke up, I moved on then came summer and then my first year of highschool. A long lost friend I guess you could say, met up with me and told me she met this GREAT guy and told me his name. I told her that he was an asshole he treats girls like crap don't date him he'll break your heart, yadda yadda yadda. They dated for about 2 months and broke up because shockingly enough, he was cheating on her. She came to me apologized for being a bitch and not listening to me and I forgave her. Now, about a week after they broke up I found out that he was trying to hook up with some girl. She's an innocent girl and a complete sweetheart that should not be dating a guy like him. I told her how he was and she didn't believe me. I have been trying to prove for the longest time to her (they're still dating, it's been 5 months) that he's a lying, cheating, bastard. So I got one of my friends to act as if she had a crush on him and talk to him online and see what his reaction would be. Sure enough, he accepted the offer of getting head from her, making out with her, and even getting sex from her. We saved the conversation and printed it out and showed it to her the next day. She didn't believe a word of it, so she showed it to him and his excuse was that his friend was over and they were just joking around. My friend pulled out her cellphone and read off a number and said "Is this you're boyfriend's cell phone number?" and sure enough, it was. After that day, he IMed her and said this "Baby, why'd you have to start shit today, I didn't want her knowing about that!" Which proves my point that he's a lying, cheating, bastard. I'm fed up with trying to deal with her not believing me. But it bothers me so bad that he's doing all this to her! She hates my guts because she claims I'm trying to break them up and me and a good friend of hers almost got into a fight (fists, hair pulling, slapping.. typical girl fight). I decided not to even bother anymore, but I feel so horrible just sitting here, seeing what he's doing to her and not being able to do ANYTHING about it because she won't belive me! I think that now she's begining to see what he's doing to her but I really don't want to forgive her for what she put me through. Should I keep trying to point out the blaitenly obvious? Or should I let her figure it out on her own? IF she ever figures it out and they break up and she comes crying to me, what should I do? I don't want to forgive her! Please help, this is so confusing for me. Sorry it was so long.

You have every right to be mad. I would not be the happiest girl aloive if mine ever did that to me. The best thing I can tell you is that you have to let her figure it out on her own. In the mean time try mending the torn friendship. Just tell her that you were wrong even though you so know that you are not. Become close friends with her again so that atleast when the little bastard does ruin her life you can be there for her to fall back on. Also, you can be close to her so that if he ever tries to get her to have sex you can tell her not to that it is not worth risking pregnancy. The best thing that you can do now is try to help her with the relationship. So that she won't get crushed as hard when the time come. Even though you don't want to forgive her and she may be the biggest bitch you ever knew I would rather help the bitch so she doesnt get pregnant then watch her suffer with the hurt of gettin dumbed and possibly being pregnant. Sometimes you have to take the harder path it will pay off in the end. You will have to put up with a lot but just think about the day when he dumps her and you are the only one that she has to be there for her. If you dont think that that will work then you maybe as a last resort just tell her to come to this site explain the situation to some people and then we can all comment on it. Maybe then she will realize that you could have some knowledge. Don't get to stressed out and just be happy that you are not the one that is blin to the relationship anymore. Wish you luck
Advice for Teens

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I like a guy in my grade but there are few problems. First, all my friends hate him. And then he is about a foot shorter than me. And then of course, the popular girls of my grade are laways flirting with him, though I doubt any of them would actually date him. I sit next to him in one class, but I can't ever talk to him. It would be awkward for me to ask him out because I'm not sure if he likes me because he's always trying to impress his friends who don't like me, but when they aren't around he's nice to me. How should i approach him?

Try just talking to him. I started talking to this guy once and we really got to know eack other and we ended up going out for a long time. And now even though we are broken up we are still really good friends. The more you talk to him the more you will know about how good of a boyfriend he would be. Don't kid yourself either. Be truthful to yourself and listen to your heart. Also bring up things about his family... guys like it when girls are interested in their background and where their roots are. Heighth doesnt matter my friend is the eaxct same way he is shorter than his girlfriend and they have been goin out for almost a year now. Don't let the popular girls get in the way. You are probably right they won't date him. Keep the voice of one of your truest friends in the back of your mind you never know they may actually be right. If you think that they are wrong then ask them to support their opinion. You have to keep an open mind. I hope you get the man you want or at least gain a good friend. Just get some gut up and go for it. Like I always say... you will always mis 100% of the shots that you don't take. Good Luck.

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I love my bpyfriend but then there are these 2 other guys. This is the problem..

Ive been going out with my boyfriend for about 4 months and I love him a lot. Before I ever went out with him I always likes this other guy! Lets call him Mike. Well Mike and one of my best friends went out off and on for about 5 times. I never told anyone that I liked him and no one knew. Now Mike told me he liked me and he wants to go out with me! I dont know what to do because I like Mike also and I like my boyfriend. There is this new guy who came to school and I think I'm starting to like him to. I already feel jelous when someone flirts with him. We talked a couple of times tho and I like him. My boyfriend is very complicated at times! We have had some issues but we all worked it out! I dont know what to do!!! I like all 3 of these guys! I dont want to hurt my boyfriend because I love him and I also want to go out with Mike and I like this new guy! Please help! I`l rate good I promise! Thank you.

Well, I can tell that your boyfriend means alot to you. And I can respect that. Mike, have you ever seen him with other girls like not just flirting but like touchy feely? Ask your boyfriend where he sees the relationship going. Depending on what he says could answer your question. Or maybe you could ask him if he loves you. If he says yes ask him to explain what the word means when he says it. Ask him how he feels inside when those 8 letters ( 3 little words ) come out of his mouth. As far as the new guy I think that you should get to know him before you go making any decisions. Hope you have luck with your men.

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ok long story short>>>i got caught shopliftin.....(my friends had nothin to do wit it)......**dont tell me anythin about the shopliftin like its bad or anythin bc i undastand everythin that happened**....but my friends mom is pissed at her bc she is the one i was stealin shit 4....but i still dont want her to take anypart of it ....and im only aloud over her house if i talk to her parents but how would i start up a convo wit her parents?

if you dont mention anything about shopliftin is bad or anythin like that ill rate high...thanx

You could start out the convo with " I understand that you are mad at me but i think that you shoudl give me another chance. After all i was stealin for your girl. Tell her that you understand the consequences and you are willing to take responsibilty. That should work... just make her believe that you are ready for anything that she could possibly throw at you as far as questions. answer everything in a complete logical answer so that she knows you are being truthful. Wish you luck!!!!!
-- Advice for teens --

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last yr i was sort of going through depression, i was just sad and angry all the time, my mom never took me to the doctor because she doesn't believe in "pills", i overcame it, just by trying really hard by myself, and now im a really positive person and i love life, but i have anxiety problems and i stress a lot about the littlest things, i cant help it, i just get really anxious at every little thing, and when i think about it afterwards i know its stupid,should i go to the doctor..if i do i know hes gonna put me on pills.so i dont know if thats good or bad..

well it is up to you. If you do go to a doctor then i would ask him maybe about a phsychologist. Then you could lead a normal life without pills. And pills arent a bad thing alot of times they are made from plants ground up and made into capsules to help relieve symptoms. It is totally up to you though. I wish you luck. Hope that i have helped.
Advice for teens

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im asking this question for my friend ... a few months ago she wanted to be homeschooled ... then she found this really nice boarding school that she liked A LOT! so she requested information and things of that sort on teh internet and things like that...well she was sure her mom was going 2 say yes...well her mom said that it was A LOT of money 2 pay especially shes one of four kids...four girls...so it kinda sux for her! i feel really badly for her and she asked me 2 write this...she cant go to the boarding school or homeschooled and she doesn't want to go 2 public/private school because in her area...they judge you at pub. and private school...

PLEASE HELP THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT TO HER AND ME!!

AND AGAIN PLEASE HELP!!

Well that is hard. She might just have to be judged. It is something that we all have to go through. If not now later in life. If later on she was working at a wonderful job that she enjoyed and payed good would she quit just because someone was judging her. I hope that she wouldn't. In life there will be things and obsticles that you have to over come. It doesnt help that she thinks about it either. As a good friend of hers( which it sounds like you are one) you should support her and help her get through these rough times. As long as she has a good support system then she can live life with out any fears at all. Just tell her to face the world head on. To stay tall and work hard at anything that she does. Another way for her to get her self esteem back is to help other people. Like volunteering at a local hospital or just having an advice column all her own. To help people with the knowledge that she has learned fromo dealing with her problems and helping someone else. It is almost like pay it forward. What you do is you do something nice for three people and when you do this nice thing you have to tell the person that exactly what i am telling you. Try to help her in anyway you can. It is a hard time for her.

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for the past few months the inside of my right cheek has been really sore. I looked at it in the mirror the other day and there's this ~half inch diameter laceration there. I donno what to do, it hurts and it won't go away. any advice?

Go to a dentist or doctor it could be the sign of an infection

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Well...It started out as:
This guy IMed my friend and she added him to a chat we were having.Well after my friend left we started talking and he gave me his other screen names. We talked/talk everyday. Well, we got really close...and now I think I may be starting to develop feelings for him.

Is it wrong that I might like him as more than a friend if I've never met him face to face? I don't know if I should...because...well,I'm almost positive he is NOT a paedophile...but one can never be to sure. I don't want to get hurt like that, but I just want to know if its wrong to have a little crush on him.

It is ok to like him. really that is the best way because you get to know him by personality not looks. which can sometimes blind people of the real heart and soul of someone. On the other hand meeting him can be dangerous like you said. If you wanted to meet him have your parents go with you and maybe a friend to stand by your side so that if somethin happens there are witnesses definatly do it in a popular area where there are people and if they arent who they say they are they wont be as tempted to make a move. For example in a restraunt is probably the best. And like i said it is ok to like him it could open your eyes to another person that you have never seen someone that you know just by the way that their mind thinks and the things that he goes through. I hope that you have luck in what ever you seek. And please be careful! I cant say that enough.

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Ever since fifth grade ive had a 2 really close friends that were like the only ones i ever hang out with. But one of my friends is also in this group of girls who im friends with but they always look like they have so much fun! I really want to hang out with more people but how do i do that with out acting like a tag along?

If I were you I would just slowly start to talk to the other people in the group like on your own time. Or maybe ask your friend if she could introduce you to some of the people. Then sooner or later kind of start inviting some of the girls over for a sleep over. And just really get to know them. good luck

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Im 17 and i have a very small penis and when ive gone to have sex with my gf i have trouble getting it up and im not sure what to do it is embarassing what can i do? And will my penis get bigger?

Well there are many things that you can do. Try a panis enlarger which you can purchase on the internet. Or you can try any of the medications out there just type your question or problem in to the address box to search it. Your penis might get larger but it is probably not likely. Well I hope that i have helped. Good luck with your gurl!!

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ok, well i'm 16 ,i have a really bad depression problem i have been addicted to cutting and still have urges frequently , i have suicidel thoughts very frequently and the real problem is my parents refuse to admit there is a problem, it seems like theres nothing i can do to make them understand, the wont even get my prescribtion

Try to ignore the thoughts. I know what you are going through i have suicidal thoughts sometimes too. If your parents are refusing to get your perscriptions then you need to call someone to get that medication whether it be a grandparent or maybe a trustworthy neighbor. If that still doesnt help you can drive so maybe you need to go to the hospital and speak with a counselor. I hope i helped
Advice for teens

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There is this girl in a couple of my classes that i like but im not sure if she likes me more than just a friend. I want to ask her out but im not sure how exactly. What should I do?

try to get her attention and if that doesnt work then you should just go for it and ask. Try first asking if she would ever consider it. If she says no then you should move on. If she says maybe then tell her to answer it with a yes or a no. If she says yes then go ahead and ask her out. I hope this helps you .
advice for teens

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