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Q: I've been seeing this guy. I met him at school but now we are at home for the summer time, him living in Jersey and me living in Pennsylvania. We text non-stop. We started texting and talking a lot on move out day and we really haven't stopped since and it's almost a month and a half out of school.
We fight quite a bit but it never really bothers me because we always fight until everything is all out in the open, we fix it and then we're okay.
I went away this past week to my family cabin in the mountains, leaving me with no cell phone service, so I couldn't talk to him while I was away for five days. I came home yesterday and we started talking again but he was being weird so I asked him what was up and he said while I was away, it gave him time to think and he decided that he doesn't want a girlfriend anymore because the distance is too much. So, I got upset because all we have been talking about is becoming official and he even talked me out of being negative about the situation when I wasn't for it. I'm all for it now, I go away for five days and I come back and it's like the tables have completely turned, I want to be with him but now he's being the negative one and he doesn't want to be together.
So, naturally, we argued. I told him I think this may be the end then, that he lead me on all this time to just let me down in the end and he told me he loves me, he knows he has feelings and that this isn't over between us, the last thing he wants is for us to stop talking but the situation is just tough. He told me he talks to his friends about me all the time and that he doesn't throw the L word around lightly but he told me he loves me.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I'm just confused. Why would he be so willing to fight for us and want to be with me but I go away and we don't talk for a few days and he decides this isn't for him anymore? Then he tells me he loves me but he doesn't want to be with me. If he loves me, then shouldn't he want to fight for us and want to make this work? What do I do?
We are both 19. I'm female.. he, obviously, being the male.
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Hi there, sorry to hear you found yourself in this situation we've all been there at some stage unfortunately. What it sounds like to me from an outside point of view, is that he obviously likes you and you like him and when ye were together in person everything was great and that carried on after ye left school and that had become almost routine talking the whole time and the vibe and feeling from when ye were physically together was still present. Then you went away for a few days, which allows the space in and time to think, and especially with guys, any sign of anything getting very serious they usually freak out- not always for long and it's only natural too so we can't blame them for that. He probably realised when he had so much time free again from texting etc that he wanted more time like that to himself and he probably associated having to talk and having no free time with having a girlfriend- a mistake a lot of people make. So while I'm sure he still cares about you, he knows at this stage that you want to be with him because you told him. So he has it in a good situation at the moment because he can say to you yeah I don't want anything serious but I do love you which keeps you holding on in the background while he makes up his mind. Not a good place to be in for you. You need to have one final conversation on the topic and say how you weren't up for the situation and he talked you into it and now you are ready for it and he has changed his mind but he's still telling you that he loves you etc and that he needs to make up his mind because you can't just wait around for him to decide. It's tough, but if you really want a genuine answer and to know the truth it's the only way to do it really because otherwise ye could find yourselves in a situation where neither of ye know where ye stand and your head will be wrecked by the end of it. If he persists in telling you that he doesn't want a relationship and he tells you he is sure about that, sadly you will have to accept that and try move on. I hope this has helped, it's difficult to explain this to someone who is wrapped up in the situation. I wish you the best.
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Q: Hello! I need help on trying to quit thinking my girlfriend is cheating on me :(.. I'm 20 and she is 17... I love her a lot and I can't stop thinking that she is cheating on me! We have been together for 6 months and it scares me to think about it and I hate thinking about it! Its complicated to explain, sometimes she doesn't show that she loves me and every time I want her to hangout with me she says that she can't control it because of heer parents but yet she can still go and hangout with her friends! And when we do hangout we have a good time and sometimes we fight! I just don't know what to do :'(... Makes me angry! If someone could help me I can explain more! Thank you!
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She might not necessarily be cheating on you, she just might not be into intense relationships. Some people in relationships don't hang out or talk all the time while other people see each other every day. You should try telling her your concerns and she what her reply is to it, it is possible that her parents don't want her spending too much time with a boyfriend but they don't mind her friends. She should see though because ye are going out together after all. Everybody fights, that's not a big deal- it just depends on what ye are fighting about. If they are very serious arguements then that's not a good sign. If you feel she's not that interested then maybe you should take note of that and see if there is a relationship out there better suited to your needs
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Q: Iam From iNDIA I MET A GUY 4 YRS BEFORE after few days i told him that i love him he says no and now after 4 yrs 4 months 22 days he asked me for my mobile numbre and i gave after that on the next day he ask me that would i like to go with him at discotheque till 2am night to celebrate 31 dec but i said no i dnt know why he is talking to me whats the reason behind it iam quite confuse what does he mean what kind of intention/feeling he may have behind it or about me. my age is 20 complete and his 24 complete. please reply as early as possible please.
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If you told him you loved him only a few days after you met him,it might have freaked him out a bit because he didn't want anything that serious or intense. Four years later he might have matured or just decided to get back in touch to see how you are and if anything has changed. Maybe he does like you and he wants to see how ye would work out now but he might be just checking up with you as a friend to. If you like him and know him then talk to him but if you are not interested then there's no point in meeting up with him.
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Q: Okay, so. I promised my bf I'd send him some of my private stuff. I only promised because he sort of forced me into promising but then I said it was no big deal. So I told him I would send it to him by the end of the day. But it turns out that things went wrong that day and I ran out of time to send it to him. I was gonna text him a sorry but then he called me a bitch for not sending it. How should I react!?
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Don't send him anything private. That can be a very bad situation to get yourself into because then he will have it forever and you will lose control over what happens to it. If he forced you into that is even worse and completely unacceptable. Then on top of that he called you a horrible name because you didn't send it. I think this guy doesn't sound like the right kind of guy for you and maybe you should think about taking some time away from him.
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Q: Hi, I'm 19/f and my boyfriend is 18.
He is currently living with me and my parents. We have been together for a year and two months. He's been living with me for almost 4 or 5 months.
Since he's moved in. I've noticed a change in the way I act with him. I'm not as affectionate. We rarely have sex. I get so irriated in everything he says or does. I'm not even sure why. The littlest things he does, just irriates me. We have little agruements, and than we will kiss and make up. Sometimes I am affectionate, and whatnot.
I just don't get it.
I like to have my space. But sometimes he just leans all up on me and it drives me crazy. Am I loosing feelings for him or something? Should I end it?
I really don't want too. I mean despite everything, I love him very much. When he's gone to work, I miss him.
Does this mean, I just like the thought of someone being there, or what? He thinks I only like the thought of having someone there, but I know I love him. I can't even think about losing him, or it hurts. Silly sounding, I know. But its true.
I'm just so stresed. I feel so guilty for even asking this question. Any advice on what I should do?
I also think, that one reason why I'm not that affectionate, is because I don't want to come off disrespectful to my parents. They don't like to see us all over each other; it was one of the rules when he moved in, along with sex, or he'd get kicked out.
I dunno. I'm just torn.
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This happens to a lot of people in relationships when they spend too much time together.When you see someone everyday allday long, you don't get excited like you would if you hadn't seen them for a week or a couple of days. Everyone needs space and time apart, especially since ye are both so young to be living together already it puts extra stress on the relationship.
I don't think it means you love him any less, I think you are probably just too used to having him around the whole time. Ye need to set boundaries so that ye both get time apart and that will make ye're relationship stronger. If you spend too much time with anyone, boyfriend, best friend, family- anyone- you end up getting annoyed at them.
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Q: ok ive been with my boyfriend for about 3 months and we dont do much with eachother. and ive been starting to have feelings for my ex i broke up with him about 3 and a half months ok because i i didnt feel anything. but now i realized he was a breat boyfriend and im starting to fall in love with him. but i rlly dont wanna hurt my boyfriend. and my ex has a girlfriend by the way. but i would fight for him. what should i do????
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If you didn't feel anything for your ex when you were with him then it's possible you would feel the same again if ye got back together. You might only think you like him again because you are not happy in your current relationship and you might be a bit jealous of your ex's new girlfriend. If you are not happy with the boyfriend you have at the moment, then you should break up with him but I don't know if trying to get back with your ex is a good idea either since he has a girlfriend and you didn't feel anything with him before. Maybe try being single for awhile and then make up your mind about who you want to be with or how you feel.
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Q: Hi guys, i'm in a bit of a rut. I used to be friends with this one guy and one day in the spring time he got mad at me for a reason i do not remember, but his friend told me that if i sent him a nude picture he would get this guy to speak to me. so after two hours of him trying to convince me to i finally i did. i am not proud of it. but now that it is almost winter the picture got posted on facebook. (From my old friend, not his friend) He keeps calling me from blocked restricted numbers and just whistles in the phone. A few months ago he called and whistled and than said some very inappropriate thing to me. And a few weeks ago someone randomly pulled up to my house at about 3 in the morning and started screaming things out the window. my brother had fallen asleep in his car and woke up to it and chased after them a little till he lost them. than the following week or next week they came at about midnight and i ran down the stairs opened the door and when they saw me they took off. now i dont know if that was him or not, but it all seems to be ironic than. This guy is a literal lunatic and i am scared of him coming to my house to hurt me or my family. i keep the doors locked but i feel like i keep kearing things so i keep checking the house because it wouldnt surprise me if he found a way in. i am 16 years old, and is 20 or 21. Can someone tell me how to tell my parents without me getting in tons of trouble if possible to avoid. and what i can do in the mean time to feel safe? ANY advice is helpful! absolutely anything! whether its comforting, or advising me to do something. should i get the police involved? PLEASE HELP! it will be very appreciated!
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You are in a very difficult situation understandably! First thing I would say to you is, never send naked pictures to anyone you are not comfortable with or don't trust, even then it can be tricky if you and the person break up because then they have those pictures on their phone etc.
Secondly, this guy sounds like a lot of trouble.The fact that he is going to your house and harassing you like that is unacceptable. I'm assuming the picture has been removed from Facebook and you have reported him for abuse? This guy is also a lot older than you and is probably taking advantage of the fact that you are younger and less experienced in these things. You have to tell him that if he doesn't stop harrassing you, you're going to go to the police and show him you're being serious. If he continues to harrass you in this manner then you have to tell your parents because he sounds crazy and you don't know what he might do. If you have your parents support in this then they can help you to combat it, you need some adult help that can talk to the school or to the police. I know you are probably scared to tell them but really you have to tell them because you can't sort this situation alone.
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Q: Ok i know this is going to souond stupid, but im willing to take that risk. ok how many holes does a girl have in her vagina? Because i looked and there was only 2 (counting your butt hole) but wen i wear a tampon i can still pee. Me and my friend were discussing it (i have NO idea why) so just give me an anwser please!
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All together including your "butt hole" there are three holes. One for urine, one for periods/sex and one for poo. This is why you can still urinate while using a tampon!
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Q: okay so i've had my period for a little over a year now and my mom makes me use pads because she says tampons arent healthy.
im a cheerleader and i hate the feeling of the blood leaking like how can i tell my mom that i perfer wearing tampons?
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Tampons aren't unhealthy, they are perfectly safe to use as long as you change them every few hours. I understand it is an awkward conversation to have with your mum and even if you do have the conversation with your mum and she still insists on you using pads, there is nothing stopping you from buying the tampons yourself and using them. You can still take the pads from your mum and when you're not cheerleading or active you could use them too. You are more than entitled to use what you like :)
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Q: Hi I am a 33 year old man, and I'm currently long distance dating a 21 year old.
We have been dating for over a year. And we text all day an mainly text during the night...
I love her she been there for me threw thick and thin... We have so much in common, we can talk for hours an never get bored...
An a while ago I found out she been talking to her ex via- email, im chat and phone convos... An she was still telling him she loves him, she wants too be with him... etc etc...
So when I confronting her, she told me the truth that she had been talking too him, and having sex with her other ex...
I forgave her...
And 5 months roll by...
And her other ex from Texas came by...
She lied and told me she was seeing the Twlight movie, and she met up with him, and went mia all night...
I found out confronted her...
And she told me she did, and she just kiss him and that was it, but she was gone all night...
I forgave her because I didn't have proof that she went beyond kissing... An 2day she sent a strange text too me like it was meant really for someone else, saying that she could be at some place in twenty minutes, an i asked her who was that text to, an she said her little cousin...
i need help... please give me the best advice about this siuation, im confused. and I don't know if i can continue to trust her...
Ps: I cheated on her, but way in the beginning an i've changed drastic for her...
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She's admitted to having sex with one of her exs and she also admitted to kissing another man after lying to you about where she was. I think this is a very clear sign that you can't trust her. These were only two events you found out about, but there could be other events that you just didn't find out about. I think she has made it clear that she doesn't want to be in a faithful one man relationship from the fact that she keeps doing things like this.
If you think you can forgive her and trust her again then that is your choice and only you can decide that, but I think you have a lot of reasons not to trust her after everything that happened. If I was in your situation I would find it very difficult to trust someone who treated me like that. I hope you come to the right decision and can be happy again
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Q: Every were i go i always get treated like trash, like a dog. at work everyone steps on me and talks crap on me, at home i get treated like a nobody and i cant do anything about it. I still treat the ones with respect but at the same time still standing up for myself and still they treat me like i dont matter. I go to school and teachers dont want to help me because i look like a gangster or troublemaker. (i also droped out of school and went to go to an adult highschool cause of it) at home everyone treats me like a black sheep. my parents wont even help me because i should just defend myself and be a man. i get no attention from them and they act as if i dont exist but when i want to go do somthing like hang out with freinds or go to concerts they say no even though i have the right cause i fend for myself. everyone acts as if they can do this and more. they feel they own me but they don't. so why do i feel this way. P.S.
Im sorry that this message was so long im stressed out and want awnsers. Also im 17 if that helps anything
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you are in a very difficult situation and I know at some point in all our lives we feel like we're not being treated with the respect we deserve ( and we're usually right!). Your situation seems to be particularly bad and I know it must seem horrible for you but there is always hope. I'm happy to hear that you are still going to an adult highschool because having that education is your ticket to getting your own life and your own place and everything you'll need in your future life. I know right now that might not seem like much, all you can do for now is keep your head up. If there are people who are treating you badly or making you feel bad about yourself don't talk to them, find people who like you for who you are. Parents are difficult, we always feel like they are holding us back! They probably don't want you off at concerts or hanging around late at night because they are worried about you.The best thing to do is to compromise, then as they learn they can trust you they will be easier on you. If you want to go out, tell them where you are going and then agree a time you have to be back by etc. People see you as you see yourself,if you are confident and like how you dress etc then people will see that in you and respect you for it.
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Q: We have been together for a year and a half. I caught him with a tagged account which had numerous conversations where he was flirting with girls. We talked everything over, and he explained that he was not trying to get with the girls. Because I had danced with a guy at a party we went to, he decided to start getting on the website to make himself feel better. To uplift his self esteem. Another reason why he explains he did it was because I always accuse him of wanting sex every time he kisses or touches me. Anyway. He promised to stop with the talking online. Just recently I happened to find another account on Google plus, where he was writing comments on girl's pictures. Initiating that he wanted to talk to them. He says that they never responded to him. They are girls from different states. They are famous (I don't recognize any of them) and he did not do it to cheat or get with them. He understands that I didn't do anything wrong, and that it was wrong for him to do it.He says I push him away when he comes and sees me too much.This hurts him. He says he's had many chances to cheat but he hasn't. He has not cheated on me with girls in real life. He doesn't cheat. Just because he loves me too much and I'm his first love everything that I do hurts him. The online thing is his escape. He feels he can drop it. He did it so it would make him feel good every time he felt like I was going to leave him.He says I'm the only person that can actually make him happy. I think this is very contradictory because if I were, he would not be on there. My plan is to break everything off. I feel disrespected. I feel like I'm not good enough for him and that is the main reason why he did this. Not once, but twice. I count this as cheating. I don't know how else you guys see it. I think it's time to end the whole relationship. I don't even want to try because I feel like he is going to find better ways to keep on with his ways. I think he just needs to find someone that can make him feel happy, and that person is obviously is not me. He says he loves me and that he wants to work things out and to help him change, but I don't think he can change. I just want out.
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I would agree with you, I think even if he hasn't cheated on you in real life the way he his acting is unacceptable. You have obviously thought this through a lot and I think you have come to the right decision. It's not fair of him to blame you and to say that you are forcing him to do these things because you're not! He needs to sort himself out and you need to be with someone who will treat you right
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Q: how is one classified as "good in bed" like what does the guy have to do to be good in bed and what does the girl have to do?
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There is no one particular thing one has to do to be considered "good in bed" because what is considered good by one person might seem awful by another. The main thing people look for out of partners is a pleasurable experience where they conect with the person. Nobody wants to feel like they are in that situation and the other person is for example bored or fed up, so show some emotions, be playful and don't take yourself too seriously. However, never do anything you're not comfortable doing because your own needs come first! Be involved in the experience and tell the other person what you like/want- people appreciate some direction and be encouraging so they know that you are happy because self confidence can be a big problem when it comes to things like this :)
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Q: I just lost a good friend of mine...skateboarding was his life. He was born to skate, lived to skate, and died skating. He was the most amazing guy ever. He was friends with everyone, no matter who you were. He would do anything for anyone too. Three days ago he was skateboarding and his board went out in the middle of the street. He ran after it and was struck by a pickup truck. He was in a coma for 2 days and then they did some brain tests and he failed them. He wa s brain dead. He was only 14 yrs old. I know hes in a better place now...probably skateboarding(: ...but i just dont know what to do )': i miss him like crazy...i just wish i could be with him in Heaven..a place where theres no more goodbyes "/ ...what should i do?
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I lost a good friend too, it was a few years ago now and he was older than your friend but he loved to skateboard just like your friend did. It was a tragic accident what happened to your friend, especially since he was so young. I found it very difficult to cope with the loss of my friend but as time goes by it gets easier. We had remembrance ceremonies for him, and we all gathered at his house from time to time to talk about him and how great he was, it really helped. I also go visit the grave from time to time which can help as well. If your friends new him too then it can help to talk to them about it because ye are all experiencing the same thing. Keep your head up
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Q: am on a diet but yesterday I have a bag of baked cheetos!! did this ruin my progress?
Yesterday I ate some baked cheetos and then I ate some more and ate the whole bag, the bag was big. Now I feel bad for eating them and I was eating healthy before I ate them. I just want to lose at least 15 pounds. Ive been on a diet for 4 days. Do I have to start my diet over today?
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When people diet they find it very difficult to be "good" all the time. Everyone is allowed a treat now and then otherwise the cravings will just get worse and worse. If you want to continue with the diet then go back to what you were doing before you ate the bag of cheetos but allow yourself a small treat every now and then, that way you shouldn't be so tempted by all those bad foods:)
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Q: hi. i am the same person that asked this question http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=600975. i was wondering, if i really decide to tell him how i feel, what would be the best way? text message? in person? i don't think i can get him away from his friends to tell him in person and if i try to talk to him around his friends he might be rude to me and he and his friends might make fun of me or something like that. but i'm not telling him how i feel in order to develop a relationship with him. i'm telling him because i don't want to lie to him, having him think i think of him as just a friend when i really don't. so how should i tell him?
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Hey there, I read your previous question too and you seem to be fairly sure that this guy doesn't like you in that way and you said yourself that he's a "jerk" to everyone, so maybe telling him how you feel isn't the best idea? He may just upset you further by the response you get. If your friends don't like him and they have a valid reason then maybe you should pay attention to them. If you think he might make fun of you then this guy isn't the kind of guy you want to be hanging around anyway! you deserve way better than that
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bio
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Hey guys :) I've been told by people, young and old, male and female, that I give good advice and I want to be able to help others out when they need advice so please feel free to ask me anything and I will always do my best to help ye out in any way I can.
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Info
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Gender: Female Member Since: December 22, 2011 Answers: 16 Last Update: July 10, 2014 Visitors: 1828
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