Hey evryone! My name's Stefana and I love giving advice and helping people!!! You can just ask me any question you have about love, friendships, and family problems...and I'll do my best to give you the best advice I can!!!!!!
So ask away!...
E-mail: stefana3@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Ontario, Canada
Occupation: Student
Age: 17
Member Since: August 10, 2007
Answers: 59
Last Update: May 8, 2009
Visitors: 4627
Main Categories:
Love Life
Mental health
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Alright so I'm nearly 16 (girl) and I've never had a boyfriend. Its not that there's somethign wrong with me or anything, its just that I'm not super outgoing or the type of person to flirt with a guy who I don't actually like. Nobody really dates at my school (I'm not kidding, there aren't that many relationships within the school, most kids' bfs/gfs go to other schools) and I don't really know many kids from other schools (haha I know, loser, right).
I never really cared about getting a boyfriend before cause it was just like, whatever, and I never really thought I was ready for it, but now I think I am and am ready to start looking this summer. Not to sound cocky but I don't think I'd necessarily have a problem getting a boyfriend, I'm fairly attractive and have a great personality (or so I've been told, haha) I just don't know where to look. So where are good places to meet guys? And what are good techniques to get the guy to make the first move?
Haha I know this sounds really lame but I don't have a lot of experience in dating and I pride myself on taking relationships slow so that they actually mean something. I don't want to date for fun, I want to date to find meaning. So I don't want to be picking up any sleazy guys hahaa
thanks so much :) (link)
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wow..you sound exactly like me when I was turning 16! lol...well I'm 17 now...so anyways, first of all, you shouldn't really worry about it too much because I know of girls who never had a bf until they were 18..lol..but yeah if you really want a bf and you don't think you can start dating some guy from your school..then some good places would be:
~the movies
~malls
~coffee shops
~teen clubs (I've tried that, but I don't think you can find a guy who wants a meaningful relationship there..lol..at least I didn't...maybe you'd have better luck..)
~you can try joining like sports teams or clubs where there would be guys and it's something that you're interested in...
Well those are some options...
Here are some techniques to get the guy to make the 1st move:
~you can try flirting from far away...that would be like the basics like checking the guy out and smiling at him from a distance...so then maybe he'll get the hint and aproach you.
~Or you can get a friend to introduce you to some guys...so that can widen your social circle of guys..lol.. :p
And just you know..yeah try networking..lol..
And don't be afraid to aproach a guy because chances are he's more afraid of you..lol..because pretty girls can be intimidating to a guy..if he really likes you...unless he's a player then he won't be intimidated. lol...but yeah I'm pretty sure there's tons of guys who like you..they just don't know how to aproach you..so give them a break and try aproaching them...even though it may seem impossible..lol..i know..but how else can you expect to get out there into the dating world?..
Well you already have the confidence..which is good. So then this should be easier for you! :)
Well I hope I helped!! :)
And good luck!
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Im pregnant, and my boyfriend doesn't want the baby, neither do I, but he would like me to get an abortion, and I don't believe in that. What should I do?
(link)
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Yeah don't have an abortion..lol..um...can you try giving it up for adoption or something?
or maybe if you have some relatives who want a baby...like aunts and uncles that you could give it too...
~Hope I helped!!
*Good Luck!* :)
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I'm young,16, and i tend to be one of those girls that gets too involved when i'm in a relationship. I get too attatched. I'm not looking to get married or anything or serious stuff, i'm finally trying to have fun and just talk to different guys but still being careful. So there is this guy he is so cute and i like him. he is a player, but i don't care cuz this time i'm not going to get too attatched. but i just want to know if it truly sounds like he likes me. He'll text me all the time. Calls me almost every night, one problem is sometimes he says he will call me back and he doesnt. Why?...He wants to chill for his birthday. He flirts like mad when we are around each other. (link)
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Well the reason why he says he'll call, but never does is because he's a player...simple as that. lol...well I honestly think that when a guy says that he'll call..it isn't really that important to him to call..like it doesn't really matter to him as much...so he forgets.
Now as for the "mad flirting"..lol..well that's what typical players do, but the key to this is how does he act around the other girls? Like does he also flirt w/ them or w/e?
But yeah it seems like he likes you, but just be careful...
~Hope I helped!!
*Good Luck!* :)
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Ok so me and this kid has been dating on and off since january. well wheni first started dating him he was just a kid to help me get over my last ex. But i think in late january i fell in love with him. and we have been through a lot like i got into a fight for him and got suspended. well anyhow when i go to date another guy he wants me back but he always dates other girls but its impossible for me to get over him when he does this. He currently is dating someone else but i havent tried to date anyone new since we broke up last any help? (link)
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Well when you date other guys then he wants you back because the whole jelousy thing kicks in...it's a perfectly normal reaction. Anyways, my guess is that he's dating the other girls either to get over you or to try and get you jelous. Like he might just want to see how you react to all that. Or maybe he's just trying not to get caught up and all of these sad feelings over losing you..so he's just trying to move on and get on with his life.
Well unless you're up for all the drama and everything...I suggest you steer clear from him. On-again-off-again relationships never work out...well couples fight in every relationship. Fighting is perfectly normal, but that doesn't mean you have to keep breaking up.
If you really want to try and make this work without all the unnecassary breaking up...then i suggest you talk to him about trying this one more time. (like maybe after he's done with his current gf. lol) and then see if things work out...if not..well at least you tried.
Hope I helped!!
*Good Luck!* :)
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I have been going out with this guy for 6 months now. I totally love him. But before i started going out with him he was going out with this girl. He actually cheated on her with me, but broke up with her to be with me. But when the girl found out he was with me she got mad and started stuff with me. I guess she is hurt and stuff. We even got in a fight in school (she goes to the same school as me.) But i found out my bf still talks to her. And it is late when they talk. I never told him to stop talking to her but he said he did but I know he hasn't. Why is he lying to me, does he still have feelings for her?? Or what is it?? I dont know what to think!! (link)
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Well since he cheated at all in the 1st place...that just shows that he's a cheater. And even though this time when he cheated...it was in your favor, but chances are that he could cheat on you too.
So yeah, you have the right to be suspisious because by the looks of it...it doesn't seem like you can trust this guy. Especially since you know he's lying. And trust is very important in a relationship.
So since you have no reason to trust him and he's lying to you and he has cheated before..and chances are he could cheat on you too...then why are you still with this guy? lol..no to sound harsh or anything...I'm just trying to get my point across...
but yeah, I think he might still have feelings for her. And you know that...once you love someone, you never completely get over them. you'll always have even the tiniest bit of feelings towards them.
Well I hope I cleared things up for you! lol
*Good luck!* :)
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I am 16 and I am looking to apply for a job at rite aid. I have not had any employment experience before. I got the application today, and they barely ask you anything!
They ask me if I am under 18, but not if i am 16 or over and i am almost positive you can get a job there at 16.
They ask for employment experience (which i have NONE of), but not volunteer experience which i have TONS of
is it possible to have the application and then attachhh something i write about myself? or is that dumb...
somebody please help me! (link)
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Well you can write a cover letter and/or resume. A cover letter is just where you write about your experiences. So you can write about your volunteer experiences. Also, you can write your volunteering on your resume. You can search up how to write a resume and/or cover letter over the internet...or there are books that teach it too.
Hope this helps and good luck! :)
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Hey all, Im 15/f. And my boyfriend and i have been together for a little over a year. He messaged me on myspace and said i am to obessive. even though he and never talk. Im very sonfused, he didnt break up with me, but i felt horrible after and now i am trying to back off, amd not talk as much. He called me later that night and said he was sorry that we got in a fight.. but now he is hardly talking to me.. Iddk what to do. Any advice?
Thanks in advance (link)
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Well I can think of two things that could be going on...
One: He might be cheating on you, but he doesn't wanna break up with you because he still likes you or he doesn't wanna be out of a relationship since he's not exactly dating "her"...it's just like a hook-up...
OR
Two: He's just too busy with whatever and he doesn't have enough time to talk to you...
But either way, it's not looking good...because if he is just too busy then he should find more time for you...
So my advice for you would be to just look into this some more. Like pay more attention to how he acts around you...and stuff...
Oh and the whole fight about you being too obsessive could've been his way of dropping a hint that he wants to break up with you, but maybe he just doesn't know how.
I'm really sorry about this, but I hope I helped clear things up for you..
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15/F
SO, I've got no talent.
I'm an awful singer, my hands are FAR too small for guitar or piano, and we haven't got the money for lessons anyway.
I always feel pretty depressed about it. Does anyone have any ideas for me?
Any cheapish instrument I could try and ways I could teach myself?
Or maybe some way I could improve my voice? Because frankly, I think it sucks.
I just want a little something to perk me up.
I deeply admire Helen from I Haunt Wizards, Kate Nash, Katy Perry, and Lily Allen.
Just thought I'd throw that out there.
Thanks :] (link)
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Well 1st of all if you wanna find a talent, you gotta be open minded about all the talents out there. It's not just all about the music industry...I used to think that I had no talent because I couldn't sing, but then I discovered that I have a talent in writing.
Are you good at writing or drawing?...or maybe acting?
There are many, many things to try out there...oh, or maybe you could be good at dancing.
But if you really want to be a good singer. You could try teaching yourself...maybe try searching up tips on the computer about singing and by karaoke songs to practice...
Well a cheapish instrument would probably be a recorder, but that's not a real instrument. It's like kidish..lol..but I don't know...I guess you could try buying a flute or somthing like that...not sure how much that costs, but I'm guessing it's less than a piano or guitar.
And a piano should be easy to play if you know all the notes...cause all you're doing is looking at what line the note sits on, on the paper and then playing that note...oh you could also buy books that teach you about singing, or playing an instrument, or whatever...
Hope this helps!!
Good luck...and remember..be open minded about different talents! :)
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We have been dating for 7 months, we are true and strong. We don't fight about stupid little things, we don't do drugs or drink or party like a normal teenager. We truly want to grow old together. We talk every chance we get, we never grow annoyed of each other, and we never get sick of hanging out. We have a promise to never break up and truly try and solve the problem. But since I'm a teenager, I feel immature, but I'm not. And I can sense that people think we wont last (adults).
Is it possible that we will one day be married, and have a happy ever after? (link)
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awww...that is so cute!! :) lol
k anyways, yeah I think you guys will definatly work out! You seem like the perfect couple!
And yeah, happily ever afters do happen.. :)
I wish the best of luck to both of you!!! :D
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okay well , i took 2 First Response at home pregnancy tests which both came out positive but i took a docotor urine test that came out negative. i took the home tests on thursday and i went to the doctor yeasterday and today i would be 3 weeks 2 days along...
My question is AM I PREGNANT ?!
I need to know !
I'm going crazy !
HELP ?! (link)
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I don't think you are because first of all, the doctor tests are always more accurate than the home tests and second of all, you took the doctor test after you took the home test and you're more able to see if you're pregnant or not the further you are along...so I don't think you are...
Hope this helped! :)
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So I have been talking to this guy for about a month he was my high school crush well he told me the other dayhes has the biggest crush on me for the longest time. Well he said he was givin me 3 months to see how I am around him which I can understand havent seen really seen/talked to each other since high school and he has ADHD and he doesnt take meds for it he wants to see how I act on his bad days. He said we will be pretty much together by then hes like unless you dont wanna be. And we was talking about my ex and how he hurt me hes like you put up with that asshole when here was a guy thats wanted to be with you all along. Well I dont know much about ADHD but he has days where you can tell somethings bugging him or he wont talk to me for that day is that normal? And do you see us being together? (link)
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Well I know that the symptoms for ADHD are trouble paying attention, trouble sitting still even for a short time, and acting before thinking.
But I don't think that "moodiness" has something to do with it...so he may be having some other issue too.
Well he sounds really adorable...like he really likes you a lot! lol...I think that's so cute...anyways, well do you still like him? Cause like I can't really tell you if you two belong together...if you really like him, then go for it! I don't see a problem with that. There's nothing wrong with having ADHD...it's not a severe thing.
He might also have bipolar disorder if he has days when he doesn't talk to you, but that shouldn't be something to worry about. Just tell him that you'll be there for him if he needs to talk. So then he knows he can talk to you about anything.
Hope I helped! And good luck!! :)
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ok well im kinda dumb haha my boyfriends smart. he analyzes me all the time n sometimes i take it the wrong way. so can you please tell me what you think he is saying here:
i think you wallow in a bank of self pity not quite adressing it because you are too busy trying to help others n most of the time this leads to your discomfort which you dont mind because you feel like you deserve it i also think you have a subconsciously weird obsession with what could have been not what is
WHAT DO YOU THINK HE IS SAYING?!?!?! thanks! (link)
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I think he's trying to say that you often feel sad, but you don't take the time to reflect on those feelings because you are too busy being concerned with other people. When you should be more concerned with yourself. And most of the time, you not reflecting on your feelings, leads you to being upset...which you don't mind because you think you deserve feeling that way. Also, he's saying that you tend to dwel on the past and think about "what could have been", when you should just move on and think about "what is"...
I hope I actually made this make sense! lol
Like I get what he's trying to say, but It's kind of hard to explain...I hope you understand. :)
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My crush's name is Kyle he's a super cutie & he's 15 just like me. We have a really awsome friend-ship now for a little over a year, I've told him before that I like him he just said he wanted to be friends( year ago) now, all are friends & me think he likes me, I just don't know how to bring that topic up again being I'm only a 15 year-old girl who really doesn't wanna break this wonderful friend-ship, besides I don't even know if he knows he likes me. My question, How do I tell I still have the same feelings for him I did a year ago with-out messing up are friend-ship?
～signed,
Gabriella, girl, 15
(link)
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Well are you sure that he may like you?
You might wanna spend some time looking for more signs that may indicate that he likes you.
And to be even more sure, try flirting with him. See how he reacts. But don't go too overboard with the flirting...you don't wanna scare him away. Be kinda subtle.
Like you could try the classics like touching his arm lightly when you're talking to him and also like smiling at him and like laughing at his jokes and fliping your hair...you know, stuff like that. Then watch his reaction. Hopefully he flirts back...or at least has a positive reaction and smiles or something...then that must mean he likes you.
Once you are sure...then you can try talking to him. Just make sure that there's no one with you when you talk to him. You can pick a casual spot like at school or something, but just make sure you're away from other people (if you can) to not put him on the spot. He seems like a nice guy considering that the last time when you told him how you felt, he agreed to stay friends. Not many guys would do that. Other guys would probably get scared off. So I'm sure he'll understand when you tell him again.
Just tell him that you still like him, but that you'll agree to just stay friends if he doesn't feel the same and that you'll be able to get over your feelings somehow. So that way it shows that you really value his friendship and you don't wanna lose it. So then if he doesn't feel the same then he will agree to still be friends with you.
If you're already sure enough that he likes you, then you can skip all the flirting and what not and jump right to the "telling him" part.
Wow this is long!
Anyway, good luck and I hope things work out!! :)
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how can i stop being depressed.
All i want to do is sit home
and listen to music..and imagine if i was thinner and prettier..
i havent had a boyfriend in 3 years and my mom told me today that she thinks im wasting away the best years of my life
i dont want to do anything..i think my weight is holding me back im 5'3 and i weight 176 pounds..
i have been gaining weight left and right because i dont want to do anything..yeah sometime i go out with friends and with my family..but right now they went to see the miley cyrus movie..and i didnt want to go..my mom said that i need help and i need to snap out of it..but i dont know what to do..HELP what can i do..i dont think i can afford mental help..! (link)
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Well first of all, you have to stop wishing that you were thinner and prettier!!
It's not the weight that's holding you back...it's the low self-esteem.
If your weight is bothering you that much, then you can start dieting by eating healthy and exercising. But if you just sit around the house all day, you can be 100% sure that you're gonna gain weight because you're not being active.
Second of all, as for the whole boyfriend thing, my advice to you is to just go out with a group of friends and have a good time. Go places! Meet new people! And you know what guys love more than anything?...confidence!! So when they see you enjoying yourself and having great confidence, they'll be all over you!
You have to force yourself to get out there and have fun! That's how you beat depression...by forcing yourself!
Hope this helps! And good luck! :)
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okay this is REALLY stupid.
butttt i have wavy/curly hair (depending how i sleep that night lol)
i kind of have side swept bangs..i can style my hair so that i have it but lately ive just been having a slight side part without bangs.
so i was wondering. i kind of feel like all the more attractive girls at my school have bangs...lol
but then my friend was telling me how some of the most beautiful celebrities and models dont have bangs..but im not a celebrity so it doesnt really matter..?
i like my hair both ways
should i style with bangs? (link)
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You should style your hair whichever way it looks best on YOU. Don't worry about the other girls or celebrities or whever. Just worry about you.
Like if you think you look better with bangs then do that, but if you look better without bangs then do that...
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18 F
When I don't talk to him (phone, text, in person), I'm sad, ready to break up with him because I'm so scared of getting hurt. It's like I'm wondering what he's doing and my mind goes crazy.
....but when I do talk to him....
I get so happy and excited and want to be with him forever.
He does certain things that are amazingly amazing.
and then he does things that make me say WTF.
I want to break up with him when I'm not communicating with him sooo badly, but when I am I just can't do it.
WHAT do I do?????? (link)
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Well first of all, you have to have trust with whoever you're dating. That's the number 1 thing in a relationship. Second of all, do you have a reason to feel like he's cheating or something? Like have you witnessed any signs of it? If not, then you shouldn't just suspect he's doing something. I know it can be hard at times when you're not communicating, to let your imagination run wild, but you have to try if you want this relationship to work out.
It sounds to me like you've probably been hurt in relationships before so then it's hard for you to have trust. But you have to remember that every guy is different. Just because maybe someone else hurt you, doesn't mean he will.
So my advice to you is to either refrain from suspecting anything while you're not talking to him...or to just simply talk to him about how you're feeling when you don't hear from him...whatever's easier for you...
~Hope I helped!~
*Good luck! :)
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im 13, ive gone through puberty and everything but i havent gotten my period yet. ive had bad cramps and discharge for about a year now and i dont know if its normal. (link)
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Well I knew a girl who got her period when she was like 15. So just because your later than the other girls doesn't mean there's something wrong. Everyone's different and goes through these changes at different paces. And yes the symptoms you're getting are signs of a period. So it could be possible that you'll get your period soon. For how long have you been having these symptoms?
But just to be 100% sure, you should talk to a doctor or your mom at least, whatever you're comfortable with.
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in your opinion, do you think its better to be yourself or to follow others and why? (link)
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I'd say deffinatly be yourself!
Like why would you want to follow others?
It would be WAY better to be yourself than a follower!!!
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So theres this boy whom I never talk to.. like NEVER ... I am so shy...people basically have to talk to me or I don't talk to them... the thing is... he's even shyer than I am... I really like him.. Like I've had a crush on him forever... but I don't know... I'd like to talk to him.. but I don't want to sound retarded.. and I have no idea what to talk about. TTYY for helpin!! (link)
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First of all, you should really try talking to him! If he's shyer than you then he'll be happy that you were brave enough to talk to him first 'cause maybe he wanted to talk to you, but was too shy. So just smile and act confident! Smiling helps you look more confident and when you talk to him, look him in the eyes...don't be looking down or all around 'cause that doesn't look very confident.
Secondly, here are some things you could talk about...
http://www.myjellybean.com/guys/flirting/convo.htm
I found this site for great conversation starters!!!!!!
~Hope this helps!~
*Good Luck!!!*
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I really like this guy. Whenever we're alone together he flirts with me nonstop and I really like it. But when we're around other people he flirts with every girl he sees... more or less. .. and when its me and my best friend and him he pretty much ignores me and pays a ton of attention to her ... So I guess my question is is What do you do if the guy you like likes your best friend? (link)
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Well this guy's a big flirt! It's not that he truly likes any particular girl, he just likes to flirt with every girl!
My best advice would be to stay away from him(as hard as it may be)'cause he's nothing but trouble. Trust me, I had experiences with guys like this. 1 minute he'd be flirting with you and then you blink and he's gone flirting with some other girl.
I'd advise your best friend to stay away from him too because it's not that he likes 'her', he's just really shallow and will take whatever he can get...
~So good luck with that!~
*Hope I helped!*
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