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What's the next best thing to a magical potion that cures all your problems? A firari! But, since we can't give you either of those, we're offering you the best advice on the web. When the going get's rough, you gotta keep tough and since that seems to be quite an issue these days (and since we've got enough toughness to go around), icy is the best place for advice!
Disclaimer: If you get stuffed in a trashcan, turned pink, or abducted by aliens, please don't blame us. We only give you advice, we don't force you to actually use it!
PLEASE DO NOT ASK ME WHERE I GOT MY 'CELLPHONE PIC'. I MADE IT MYSELF IN A PROGRAM CALLED PAINT SHOP PRO AND NO, I WILL NOT MAKE ONE FOR YOU. I'M SORRY BUT I'M REALLY BUSY. PLEASE VISIT SURFSUNSANDX33 AND AMERICANGIRL101'S ADVICE COLUMNS. THEY BOTH GIVE REALLY GOOD ADVICE AND ARE MY FRIENDS. PEACE DUDES!
advice
my best friend new i liked this kid and she still went with him and i told her i still like him nd she like rubes it in my face so i told him... and now she i smad and thinks im stealing him.. wut should i do?
Love. It's one of those things that can both make and break friendships. Why does it have this mysterious power over us? Because it's a feeling, a sensation, and something we cannot stop. Love is uncontrollable, unmatchable, unbeatable and immortal. Sounds like both you and your friend are captured in its math. Don't panic because not all friendships come to a crashing end because of feelings but your friend looks like she's not trying very hard to keep the puzzle pieces together. Let me elaborate, if she is rubbing it in your face that she's the one dating him, then she obviously is trying to get back at you. Maybe she is envious because perhaps he has feelings for you and he's feeling threatened. I bet your friend thinks if she makes you feel bad then maybe you'll give up and she'll have him all to herself. The key to figuring out this situation is to pretend like it doesn't bother you at all. Your friend will eventually stop because she will relize it doesn't do anything to you. Whatever you do, don't fight her on it or admit to any anger whatsoever. Your friend will be mad knowing that it's not breaking you. Show her you're stronger then she thinks and won't fall for her little foolish games. Oh, and good luck getting the guy hun ;] If you ever need advice, feel free to ask me directly at my column. ♥ iCY
Okay i have this friend and her name is andrea. we are like best friends but now i dont think so...we tell each other everything but she never sits by me at school. she is having a great time with her other friends and she tells me all there jokes...she never really talks to me anymore. she told me i cant be in there lil group anymore! so are we still best friends or not? or should i stop being her friend? HELP please!
She deffinetly does not sound like a best friend. Since she has her little "clique", if I were you, I wouldn't hang out with her. She sounds very stuck up and mean and I bet you deserve better. You should find some new friends who don't shun you like she does. Even though you tell eachother everything, you can tell everything to the guy that sits across from you in math, that doesn't mean he's your best friend. There are plenty of nice people at your school I bet who would love to have you as a friend. Andrea is obviously not nice otherwise she would let you join her little group. Good luck hun and if you ever need any more advice, feel free to ask me a question directly at my column. iCY iS ALWAYS LiSTENiNG
Dear advice giver people,
I have this friend who has just gotten out of a relationship like 4 or 5 months ago. She broke up with the guy so that's all good. Ok, so then I liked this dude Billy right? Ok, well she decides that he's a sweetheart & goes for him. Well, that doesnt bother me because I have a boyfriend & I stopped liking Billy like forever ago. Me & Billy are still like close friends though & he was telling me how he was going to ask Jessica out & all. So being the girlfriend I am, I told Jess EVERYTHING he said. Now she will NOT stop talking about him. I'm serious. We could be watching TV & she's like, I miss Billy. Ok, well, then I mention my boyfriend like maybe 3 times that whole day. Ok, then she was talking to one of my other friends and she like, "She talks about *Joe WAY too much." Ok, Im sittin there like WHAT THE HELL you kno. So I dont know WHAT to do.
Sorry it's forever long!!
We've all been in love, that tingly wonderful sensation we get when we're around a certain person. Well, your friend has taken it to the limit and it's natural for you to get bugged by it, especially since she is completely contradicting herself when she says someone else is talking about their boyfriend way too much. Here's what you do: try bringing up your boyfriend frequently during a day the two of you are hanging out. Make sure it's during different times she's talking about Billy. After you do this, see if she starts to complain. If she does, then tell her that she is doing the same thing and you would like it if she could take it down a notch and not talk about him so much. Tell her that it's hard for you since you used to like him. This may be a total lie but friends like it when it seems like they have the upper hand and it may make her want to stop since it's flattery towards her. If she's not annoyed by you talking about him then confront her in a different way. This time approach your friend the next time she says someone else talks about their boyfriend way too much. That's when you can say, "hey, you do it alot too" and wait for her response. Good luck and if you ever need any more advice, feel free to ask me a question directly at my column. iCY iS ALWAYS LiSTENiNG!
I Have this friend who is always putting themselves down and somethimes i dont know what to say becuase they arent the most attractive person and i dont want to seem fake about it. Whenever they tell me that there ugly or whatnot...im always like dont put yourself down like that your not ugly. Every time i talk to this person they always tell me how ugly they are! PLEASE HELP ME IN WHAT TO SAY TO THEM!!
I've been in this situation before. Sometimes, people really don't have alot of self confidence and it's like they expect their friends to make it up to them with comforting comments and praise. They don't realize that it's up to them to see the true beauty in themselves. I would tell your friend that they should have confidence in themselves. Give them lots of compliments all at once and make them feel good. Don't do this too often because then it will seem fake even if it's not. Throw out some random "feel-gooders" every once in a while to slowly raise your friend's self esteem. It's tough, especially in a world full of size 0 models but friends can make a huge difference. If you ever need any other advice, feel free to ask me questions directly!
should i leave my friend to go to a party with the guy i like or stay with my friend. me and my friend made the plans earlier than the party had come up....
Wow, this is tough because love and friendship are two big factors in a girl's life and they can often conflict. Talk to your friend and see how she feels about it. They always say that "Boyfriends come and go but friendship stay forever". People have opposing opinions on this subject. Some think that having a strong relationship is more important then being close with your friends. Consult your friend and ask her how she feels about this. Tell her that she won't be replaced or anything, it's just because you are excited you have the chance to go with him. Make it clear that it's up to her because she is your top priority. Friends like it when they know that they are needed. Good luck and if you ever need any advice, feel free to ask me a question directly.
I have this friend (Miranda) and I alwasy try to invite her to spend the night at my house (I'm 13 years old) and she won't spend the night unless she has another friend with her. What should I do to get her to spend the night by herself. I rate.
~~~Brittany~~~
Do you remember when you were little and you were afraid of things like sharks, the dark and clowns? Maybe not those 3 things in particular but we've all had our little fears that we have battled over the years. As astounding as this may sound, that's how your friend Miranda feels about sleeping over. Even though I can't imagine what bringing another friend over would do, she obviously isn't comfortable with the feeling of leaving home overnight yet. Perhaps you should sit her down and talk to her about it. Ask her what is scaring her and what you can do to help. As much as you probobly want to, you can't push your friend beyond her control. Some people don't feel safe doing certain things even though they are totally fine. Communication can get important facts out in the open that will make the problems better and probobly even reveal a solution. If you have any other questions, feel free to ask me for advice directly.
I am thirteen and I have lots of friends at school but my best friend is scared to spend the night at my house. In order to try to get her to, I have to either pay her money or give her my most valuable possesion. It's really gay. If she spends the night at my house, she has to have another friend come WITH her and she picks people that I hate to come so she's never been over to my house! How can I get her to spend the night at my house without having to bribe or pay her? HELP!!! ASAP!!!
When you were young, were you ever afraid of the dark? Or maybe clowns or sharks? We all have our fears that are hard to tame. For instance, when I was little, I saw a show on TV that scared me. After I saw that, I grew very afraid of television in general. Whenever someone would turn on the TV that was near me, I would freak out and have to leave the room. It's kind of like a weird phobia. That's how your friend is feeling about spending the night. Though I can't explain why she would need someone else to come with her (as for the money, everybody loves money =P), maybe you should just hang tight a while and let her grow out of it. Like alot of things, it's probobly a phase that she is approaching late in life. Does she sleep over at other people's houses or is she afraid of going away in general? Maybe you should talk about her in depth about her fears and perhaps you (being her best friend and all) could comfort her and make her feel better. If you ever need any more advice, feel free to ask me a question directly. Good luck!
hey. i hope that you can help me. one of my best friends and i have been in an on-going fight for more than 2 weeks. ive been apologizing, and it doesnt seem to be changing anything. she always finds a reason to be mad at me. idk whats going on. shes been spreading rumors about me, too. and threatened to have people jump me! weve been best friends for almost 9 years. should i just forget that she ever existed, or should i keep begging for her forgiveness?
*Katie
My two best friends and I have recently gotten through a huge battle and are now in "recover mode". I've been through your situation many times before and I know that you are probobly feeling a rush of emotions right now. Part of you wants to forget about her because she's being such a major jerk and lousy friend... however, the other part wants to forgive her so you two can go back to the good life: shopping malls and sleepovers. I wish life was that simple but sadly, it's not. You're friend sounds like she is in a bad way right now and it's probobly better if you give her some time to cool off. I know that right after I get in a fight with my friends, I'm steaming mad and I need some time alone to myself. If I were you, I would find some other friends because it's always good to have someone else in the long run. Also, you can hang out with them and get to know some other people because you won't be attatched to your other best friend. Think of it as no strings attatched. While you're doing this, she'll have a chance to truely miss you. Once you've said sorry once (which it sounds like you have), she'll have a chance to feel bad. Good luck and I hope things work out for the best. If you ever need any advice on love/friendship, feel free to ask me on my advice column. Remember:
What happens when the original, gets copied.... by almost everything they do, wear and say (even by there friends) im nto mad or anything but honestly, it is kind of well... getting aggrivating, i love them still and all but what should i do? (and no they arent staking me =P)
I completely understand what you are going through. Sometimes, you just wish that people could just learn to be unique and not copy what others do, especially when it's you that's getting copied. Whenever this happens to me, I have the tendancy to get mad or yell or just completely loose my temper. However, over the years I have figured out that loosing your cool is deffinetly not the answer but communication is. Sit down with your friends and talk to them. Just remember it's flattering that they want to be like you but of course, I know how frustrating this can be. So tell them how you feel in a calm rational manner. Even if you want to do it without being direct about what's wrong. Suggest some new styles to them, flip through magazines with them or even go to the mall. Help them develop their own style since it sounds like you are quite the trend setter ;]
O.K. My problem all started when someone was prank calling my house. I then found out it was one of my best friends. I got mad at her twice. Once for doing. Twice for lieing about it. I'm in junior high and it's so hard for me. Then, my closest best friend took up for her. Then, my other close best friend took up for her too. I don't know what to do. I live in Deer Park and I'm illegally going to Laporte Junior High. My close best friend is threatening to kick my butt and I don't know what to do. Should I switch to my legal school or continue illegally going to a school where EVERYONE hates me. I rate 5's for anyone who can really make a difference in my life! THNX TO ANYONE WHO ANSWERS!!! XOXO
HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!
~~~KaYlA
Sorry So Long But I need Help ASAP
I'm sorry this is going on hun. I understand that life can be unfair and it feels like "why me?" and you just want to dash under the covers and stay there until things clear up. Lucky for you, you have an option so it's up to you what you do with it. Since you can switch over to your "legal" school, I recommend confronting your friends about this. Tell them why you were mad and ask them why they were mad. If they aren't being true friends, giving bad answers, or you feel like you just can't handle the stress, my next advice is to talk to an advice. I know it seems like it would be the end of the world to talk to a parent or guardian but it really is good. Believe it or not, your parent or guardian will probobly be able to tell you whether they honestly think you should switch. However, if you know in your heart that you should get away then follow what you believe in, just make sure you are not running from your problems. Best of luck babe =]