Laught and the world laughts with you, cry and you sob alone.

The bigger you make this issue, the bigger it will become to everyone involved... and in the end, the more uncomfortable. When things become uncomfy around you, even when it because someone is talking trash behind your back, people associate that uncomfortability with you... bad vibes...

Best thing to do is to play it cool. It's not easy, but don't react to the situation. Be the same to those girls like you have in the past, let their problems be theirs. Obviously this does not mean you should run after them and be all needy, this is precisely the opposite, without being snotty towards them!

Be happy, so do things that you like to do, associate with people who like to do the same things. Also try new things, look at interesting things other people are doing and join in. When I'm interested in something, I tend to naturally ask questions about it, how it works, etc. In short, be proactive.

And by the way, everybody loves fun, and people tend to flock to the source of that fun. That way, because people are having fun around you, they will start to associate you with having fun and will see you as being fun.

If those girls should come crawling back, hear them out, but listen to your B.S. sense and then YOU get to decide where to go from there.

...but I may be wrong... and then its a terrible tragedy..

Best of luck!
Hoji

Start being more positive and become your own best friend first, this is REALLY big.

Try leading a more active lifestyle and do thing that interest you... broaden your horizons.

Meet more people and chose friends out of these. It will be easier with a active lifestyle and being able to talk about interesting topics and people like positive attitudes that lifts them out of their own depressions.

I could have your whole situation wrong but I can only identify with you from my own experience.

I went through a simular situation, after which I also clinged to one friend and also felt neglected whenever he would go do something else with other people. Thats not healthy, it's needy.

Get to know yourself, accept your strong and weak points, take responsability for your life then one by one work on the points you don't like and would like to change.

I have only truly been able to become my own best friend in the last three or so years, and now I am able to much better handle rejection of all sorts.

The sad part is that I'm 31 now, that means that where other people have been able to grow socially, make more and more real friends by sifting through all the people they have met, at the same time developing a social sense, I have not, and am only now learning those lessons.

Where that may come across as very negative statement, I try not compare myself with other people anymore, I do try compare myself to myself a year back, thats always very positive, and I don't beat myself up about things in my life (too much).
The point is that the sooner you start working on yourself the sooner you will see results and have a longer happier life.

It is hard work, and every step I have taken has proven worth the trouble... there are set-backs, no doubt. I'm not going to jump on my soap box and tell you, I am there. I'll just tell you what I have found to help me so far.

Do yourself a favour and google those first 3 points I made, read up on it for yourself. The first two points go hand in hand, the third point kinda flows out of them.

My Best to you.

Yup, stop telling her things that you don't want repeated... or better yet work on making better friends. That's the nice way of doing it.

Does she ever start a sentence with "I don't want to gossip, but..."?

If you are maliciously natured, like I also have been in the past over a simular situation, you could turn it into a game where you tell something to your friend, something so deliciously unresistebly untrue, and time how long the story takes to get back to you.

My best was 13 minutes, almost got me beat up, but then, denial is a powerfull tool.

G'Luck!

Ye, sounds like you have a crush on each other.

you assholes.

If you want to make double sure... when you think you are feeling it, WHILE talking to him, stand facing him, move in a little closer (halve the distance between you with one step) and touch his arm on the side for a second.
While you do this, check if his pupals dialate.
If you like first try it with your mom/friend/brother and see what their pupal response is.

Of course while you are that close you could slowly move your face closer to his at the same time and either see if he moves back, or even kiss him just then. It's not called taking a leap for nothing.

G'Luck!

truthfully, drugs can be fun... taken with GREAT moderation and serious fear of addiction.
In my opinion once...twice a year, at he beach on vacation, nothing hardcore.
if he is going overboard, tell him AND tell him you are stepping away, which is what you should do.
drugs hurt people, not because of the embarrassment, but because that person later dont know and dont care what he is doing to the people around him.

BTW lying about it is a bad sign.

take care.

relationships seems to be complicated, as some rule God conspired against us all, which seems to make most of us kinda paranoid.
If you did have such a open friendship with the boyfriend... he should have surely known, wouldn't he? and perhaps cleared it up with her himself?
I won't pretend to know the direct answer to your question,
but ye, open communication with her would at this stage seem to be the best option, in front of him and her.
but a question you should be able to answer her is... what was the interest in any case?
and you SHOULD answer that truthfully.
good luck

your friend and her brother are two different people.
Tell your friend what you see and (maybe not too harshly) how you feel bout it.
if she is your friend she will at least try to understand despite the fact that he's her brother.
If he pulls a move and you are not interested, say no, nothing wrong with that, its not like a holy war is going to break out.
unless he tries to force the situation... which is when you start shouting "RAPE! RAPE!" at the top of your lungs.

gluck!

in short, get away from her.

in long...
take a long look at how she behaves socially, does she give everybody lip service?
Look at how she treats and talks about other people in front of you, and then then she faces them.
draw up the patterns and decide yourself.

but she or the relationship is unstable,
if you want to be grown-up about it, confront her with what you see and see if things change... and you don't have to squint your eyes to see the so-called change.
watch out for lip-service, lots of people are very good at talking "nice".

My Best

unless you want to become a politician, NEVER GET INVOLVED IN POLITICS.

unless she already told about your shameful betrayal, tell the friend to keep it to herself or you might never let go of such juicy tidbits ever again (besides you might never get them again).

AND the bible does contain a part about something along the lines of "don't sit in the circle of the" ...err... s**t-talkers. So in a way LadyH is right.

any case, if they already know... hard luck, it'll probably blow over in due time, but you did betray the trust and if you feel up to it, you'll have to earn it back.

But rest assured we have all made THAT mistake repeatedly, and life does go on.
good luck to you.

wild stab in the dark, but have you ever tried NOT trying to make friends, or being overly friendly...know sounds weird but that was the mistake i made at school, just be yourself, don't be prone for attention, people seem to catch it like a bad smell.
Please yourself first. Happy people attract other happy people.

If you need a friend give me a email, i know, it would be better to talk to someone present, and hang out...but my offer stands
ck_madrynn@yahoo.co.uk

Best wishes for 2006

mmmm,
she needs to dump adam and follow mark around like a lovesick puppy or allow you to date mark.
otherwise she should start building on a harem structure or something and throwing all men she likesin there.
Above everything tell her how you see it, if you can't talk to her about it you're not that good friends anyway, being able to speak what you really feel builds or breaks friendships but bottom line is you'll be better off.
Take a little time to workout a aproach.
Good Luck!

have a serious talk then she is "in the mood".
she can't be your friend one day and ignore you flat the next.

i can't really tell who is right, but i have had a couple of those aquantances that are like you described your friend, bestpalls the one day the next day your shit.
i wrote them off.
either be my friend or not.

but maybe you did hurt her feelings, so talk to her first.

if people have shit with you they should sort it out with you (and visa versa), especially if you are supposed to be friends.

good luck :)

doesn't sound like she's trying being mean, and i can definately understand your side. Try playing with her, if she does it again, start making ALOT of mistakes on purpose or just tell her to loosen up.

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