Q: 26/f

My boyfriend is 29, we've been dating two years and we're getting married in three months. He has a nine year old daughter in another state. She doesn't know about me. He only visits her once or twice a year because she lives really far away, but he tries to call a lot and always sends money to her mom. I'm just scared because I've read articles about how a lot of kids have a harder time dealing with a parent getting remarried than they do dealing with their parents getting divorced in the first place! What's the right thing to do? I don't want to make her accept me as this new "mom" if she doesn't have to, but I also want to be honest, and I feel like I should get to know her if we're family now. The most important thing is that she's not emotionally traumatized... how can we do that?

Q: My aunt is the biggest sister of 3 siblings. I went by her for a month and now we're deciding to go by her to live. Not by her house, but get our owwn house in time.
She said she'd help but recently we've only been talking on the internet and she barely calls.....if she calls at all!!!
I really miss her calls and I wonder if she still wants us there. She completely never (ok maybe sometimes) talks about us moving there and I wish she would because how else would I know if she wants us or not.
What do you think? Do you think she wants us. (it's my, my baby bro, mum, grandma and maybe my uncle)...do you think she still wants us?

Q: ok well my dad isn't getting enough money here so he wants me and my brothers to come with him and my mom to saskatchewan and cheak out some greenhouses(thats were he works) and if he likes them we might move and if he doesn't like them then we don't move(yay) but if he does like them what do i do tell him i don't want to move and im not gonna or what

HELP PLZ!!!!! thanx

Q: My family and i aren't really as close as i'd like us to be. my parents are always yelling at me and my brother about nothing and my parents are always arguing. I feel like I can't talk to them about anything. I'm 13, so this is a point in my life when i need alot of advice that can only come from them. my brother blames me for everything. he's 10 going on 11, so he shouldn't be THAT annoying. I spend all my time on the computer or watching TV because that's the only way that i stay out of anything, but then everyone yells at me because i spend too much time doing that. once i do stop, i compulsively organize everything and then they yell at me for "losing" their stuff. what can i do to stop all this insanity and bring us closer together??

Q: Ok me and my ma are not that close together, her boyfriend got into some huge trouble, and she is really freak out. She hasn't eatting anything,and if she does she will barf it up. I kept on telling her everything will be ok, and I hug her and everything but nothing I do seems to work. I was woundering what I could do to make things better for her? So if anyone has any suggestions I would really love to hear them!

Q: Okay, I'm 13/f
I love school for two reasons- my friends and getting away from my mom. Lately my mom had her tooth puolled and she's been whining and groaning and yelling at me and being nice to my brother. I feel like a burden, That's why I hate it at home. ShouldI get professional help w/ my problems or ask my friends because they help me with alot like I help them. I'm closer to them than I am my whole family. I've told my one of my Boy BFF's who understands (and who I like but thats different) me, but he swore not o tell and now I'm thinking I should tell this teacher who everyone loves including me, but I'm not sure soooo.... what do you think?
Jeni

Q: okay this is going to be long but plz i need the help! okay throughout my whole life i have never known my dad because he has been in jail for like ever! he was in jail because he abused my mom and almost killed her. but i really wanna know him...he is out of jail right now and is not allowed to come around me...but recently my dad seen my aunt and told my aunt to tell me he loved me but im not suppose to know this......i only know because i overheard my aunt on the phone with my mom and my mom doesnt want her to tell me and my mom doesnt want me around my dad. 4 years ago...he was out of jail i think and as i was walking home from school my aunt from my dad's side was in a car parked on the street waiting for me to walk by and as i did she started asking me questions like if i remember my dad and stuff. so like my dad or that aunt on my dads side would have had to been like watching me and to know if i still lived there and to know what time i got out from school. then like a year after that happened we had a court date which i went to and my dad never showed up for the court date so my mom has custody of me. now like a couple of months ago i was with my mom in the store and my mom saw my dad in there and told me that was my dad....my dad saw me and my mom but he like turned around and walked the other way as if he didnt want to see me or he was just shocked or scared that i would hate him.....my mom almost went crazy in that store when she saw him she started cussing and everyhting lol. but my question is now does it seem like he wants to see me....and is it wrong for me to want to know him even though he almost killed my mom.....whenever he was in jail he would always send me stuff but my mom never gave me them things...she would throw them away...except she did let me keep this little purse with my name on it....please help me i am so confeused about all of this....it's really hard not having a dad. but is it wrong for me to want to know him and does it seem like he wants to see me? thank you so much

Q: PLEASE SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!!!!!!! I AM BEGGING YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i am an 18 year old teenager and have a problem. I wondered whether you could possibly offer me any advice
I think i MIGHT have suffered from neglect/emotional abuse in my past. I need some advice.

You see when I first started high school I lost two people of whom I was very close to.one of these was my Grandmother who practically raised me.She was the one who took me places, taught me, supported me and basically looked after me. I used to see her almost every day.I can never remember my real mother doing any of this. However I never noticed the lack of support by my parents…..until she died.

I started to refuse to go to school on-and-off for my first two years in high school because of this...i did not want to move on and lapsed into serious depression and somedays i couldn't find the will-power to get up. I'd just lie in bed all day i felt so depressed. But my parents never helped me.they must have seen how depressed I was and yet they did nothing. Isn't this neglect. They knew I had depression and yet they did nothing.

Then i refused to go to school altoghether at the end of this second year as i could no longer cope any more. I ended up having 5 meagre hours of home tuition per week for the last three years which should have ben spent in school. my parents didn't get me any professional help or anything. Isn't this abuse/neglect.

I ended up failing almost all my GCSEs. the thing is i don't know anything about anything. i haven't been out of the house or seen people for about three years. But my parents won't teach me things such as how to use a bus, how to open a bank account, buy a phone or anything. it's as if they don't care. my mum NEVER offers me any sort or support or advice on anything.

So basically
I refused to go to school for my first two school years

I then refused to go altogether

I ended up having 5 measly hours of tuition per week for the last three years that I should have been in school

I then failed almost all my GCSEs

But throughout all this nobody helped me
I will have to go on a very low level of course at college.However I am worried that i am not going to get the support i need at home and might lapse into depression again as a consequnce and be too depressed to get up in the mornings. Because my parents sort of expect me to raise myself!Is this OK or is this neglect. My mum’s also still not particularly nice to me.

I think I need to tell the college about this lack of support. But i don't want to get my parents in trouble. MY mum is dying of ca.ncer and i couldn't live with myself if she died in prison. But i need help. Do you class what i've just described as abuse? Also thre have been many times when my mother has been emotionally abusive towards me. She can say such thoughtless things she makes me cry. then tells me to 'shut up' or says 'you're always moaning'.

I want to tell the college so that I can get the emotional support I need and also so that they can understand one of the reasons I felt I couldn't cope with school and therefore couldn't cope. I

am 18 years old now, Can i tell the college without getting my parents in trouble with the police? Or in trouble with social services? Can i tell the college without getting my parentts into trouble???? I NEED a definate answer. please help me[:(]
Who would the college contact if I were to tell them about the neglect? I DO NOT want to get my parents into trouble. Can I safetly tell the college (now that I'm 18) about the neglect without getting my parents into trouble with social services or the police??????????? PLEASE CAN SOMEBODY GIVE ME ANY ANSWERS!!!!! I AM RUNNING OUT OF TIME AND NEED ADVICE DESPERATELY.[:'(][:'(][:'(][:'(][:'(][:'(]
I LIVE IN ENGLAND

Q:
Can you offer me any advice????
Hi i am 17 years old and really need your advice. You see about 5 years ago now, my Grandmother of whom I was very close to died. she was like a
mother to me and i used to see her almost every day. however I just don't know how to
move on. I still really miss her. it's just i just don't know what to do anymore.
We had made so many plans of do together and i had made so many dreams of things i'd
do in the future(with her by my side). but now she's dead i just don't know what to do.
Should I carry on with these dreams/plans/ambitions i'd made when she was alive and had
planned to do together, .......or should i give up on them now she's dead and find some new
dreams instead.Do you t hink it would be insulting to her memory to just carry on with
these dreams.......only now without her? so you think she'd be offended?
What should I do? i just don't know what the right thing to do is.

Also i don't understand where she's gone. i missed years out of my Secondary education
so haven't really been taught about religion and therefore don't really understand it. What
can i do about this? also, she was cremated. what does christianity/the bible say about
cremation? do cremated people still get to heaven?

Also I missed practiacaly all of my secondary educationn... therefore I also missed Religious Education? I don't understand/get where my Grandma went? Do you know how i can learn about Religion now? Do they run R.E GCSE classes at college?Also this might seem an obvious question (but just needed to check) but do they give a good all-round general education in R.E in school(sorry if this seems a stupid question)?? so if I had gone to school would I now understand where she might be? I feel terriible...because i don't get where she is. what does the Bible
/Christianity say Heaven is like by the way????
Also..............do you know how I can say goodbye to her now..i wasn't allowed to go to her funeral so never got to say goodbye. She was cremated...so there is no grave. By the way what happens to the ashes?? do they bury them in one place or sprinkle them around ...IF SO THEN where DO THEY SPRINKLE THEM AT THE CREMATORIUM???????? (which i wouldn't like to have happened) i hate not knowing. I also feel like I need to say out loud goodbye..such as where she was buried/cremated? How can I do this? wouldn't people at the crematorium stare? dO YOU HAVE ANY IDEAS AS TO HOW i CAN SAY GOODBYE??I am new to this site. is this advice free by the way..if not them please don't reply as I cannot afford to pay.I live in England.
please could you reply. I AM FROM ENGLAND

Q: Okay so i got grounded last thursday because i got caught drinking & lying. My cell phones taken away and im grounded. my parents said im grounded until i "earn their trust back" how am i suppose to earn trust back if i cant leave the house? any suggestions? I'll rate =)

Q: sorry if this is long, but i really need help. every summer, my parents encourage my sister and I to do math to get a head start on the school year ahead of us. my mom used to assign me pages of problems to do, and when i finished she would give me 100 dollars. (keep in mind, i'd been doing this all summer). at the end of last school year i asked her if i could do a french tutor instead of the math and still get the money and she said yes. well she didn't get around to signing up with a tutor until a month into summer (it wasn't like she was busy, she was just sort of putting it off). and then when she finally made arrangements the tutor asked her for a days that i was free and my mom didn't get back to him in time, so by then it was a month and a half into summer and i wasn't going to have a tutor. then i started working on math by myself, really hard!! i finished 3 units which is 119 pages of my text book. today i asked her if i could still get the full money if i did a little more math and she said no!!! i feel that this is her fault, and i shouldn't get punished for working my butt off doing math, just because i couldn't get started because she was too lazy to schedule a tutor for me. is there any way that i can reason with her without being rude, because i've been counting on that money to be able to spend on something i've been saving for for 3 months, and without it i'll never get it. help!!

Q: I purchased a pair of socks for my brother's not-yet-born child and plan to give them as a gift at the baby shower, which is next month. These are really nice socks, made out of merino wool, and (for socks) they were kind of expensive.

However, I fear that if I just give a pair of socks at the baby shower, I will appear cheap and unwelcoming of the baby. Should I just give the socks but explain that they are 100% merino wool? Should I buy multiple pairs of merino wool socks? Should I buy an additional gift?

Incidentally, this baby will be the first full nephew I will have. My half-siblings have had seven children between them, but this is the first time a full sibling has had a child.

Q: Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with a sibling moving out and going off to college? My sister and I are a year and half apart and she's moving out in a little over a week. We're really close and I just can't imagine her not being here.


We also have an older brother that moved out 4 years ago but I guess I didn't notice as much since I still had my sister.


Now, I'm going to be all alone (well...with my parents) and have the whole upstairs of our house to myself basically and I know it sounds kind of dumb, but it's scary. Has anyone else felt this way and had to deal with it?

Q: well this girl isn't exactly my friend but like she is so mean to me because supposbly i'm 'full of myself' I don't say anything too bad just once in awile i'll be like wow i llok good today or i'll say something nice about myself. But she freaked out about it and is so rude. for an example we both have pages on this site and on her page she posted this about me.


lets play guess who.
whore.
turns into a bigger slut when they get druunk.
talks about themself NON-stop.
paper thin hair.
huge greasy nose.
gorilla face.
little white short shorts.
black and blonde hair.
totally fake, all make-up.
does shit with every guy.
walking std.
icky spaced out ridged teeeth.
puussy and ignores people cause there scared to hear the truth.

and i don't know what to do, i tryed saying sorry and makeing up with her but she just stared at me the whole time and made rude faces.
and it's really bothering me because she says such rude things about me.PLEASE HELP ME FIND OUT WHAT TO DO.. :(

Q: okay..umm fourth of july is coming up and my dad was planning a trip to go up to old fordge with my aunt and uncle and cousins and stuff. i would go there the 1st of july - the 5th of july. and my cousin on my moms side is having her graduation party on the 1st of july and i cant miss that for the world bc shes like a sister to me.(and yeah, my parents are divorced) and my dad had said to me if my mom could drive half way on sunday(the 2nd) then he would meet us half way.(in utica) and now my mom says no that she cant bc she has to cook food for a 4th of july party down the street and my dad wont come and pick me up and now im like crying and idk what to do!!! im all confused and if anyone out there whos parents are divorced and know how i feel, then yeah i would lovee some advice on what to do!! please helpp!!
x3

Q: Well today I am going to hang out with my boyfriends family but he has a little brother of around 5 years old. Uhm I am not very good with kids... I usually try to make them laugh and they just stare at me...lol emabarasing!!! So please help give me some advice so I dont look end up looking like a fool.

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