I have dealt with many emotional and psychological issues both personally and in my career. I've gone thru emotional, verbal and sexual abuse, severe depression, therapy, emotional hospitalization, sexual addiction diagnosis, divorce and suicidal ideations. So I've been there, I'm a healthy person now and in a healthy relationship. But I've definately learned from the School of Experience and I'd love to be able to help others with the knowledge that all that has brought me. I'm not judgemental but I will be very frank if with my OPINIONS.
Gender: Female
Occupation: Registered Nurse
Age: 34
Member Since: September 28, 2012
Answers: 39
Last Update: October 15, 2012
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20/F.
I've dated two guys. One was a strong relationship, the other one wasn't much of anything. But I have learned valuable lessons from both and I feel like I am lot wiser from the two. Anyway, I'm a junior in college and I am a pre-med student. ( I know it's not really a major but just to give you an idea ) Well, in two years from now, I don't know where I will end up. I know I will either to go a pre-professional or medcial school, but depending where I go, I might have to leave town for possibly 4 years, maybe more, to continue my education. The thing is, I'm worried that this is a peak in life where I will either find someone or I won't. I know it sounds like an unreal ultimatum, but there are quite a few couples I know, that are my age, that are in strong relationships and I really admire them for that. The thing is, I want a strong relationship too, but I'm not sure it's very wise to have one now, assuming I do find someone. I also, don't want to date someone and have it fall apart easily. I told myself, the next relationship I have, I will make sure the guy is worth it, all through out, in almost every way possible. I know, I cannot find out if he is worth it, in the beginning, but I wouldn't attempt to date someone who I knew for sure, I couldn't see myself with. Anyway, I just moved into a new town, far away from where I orginally lived, so I'm the newbie placed where no one knows me. Most kids my age, have been living here for a long time and they've all grown up together and are really close with one another. Back where I came from, I had that with the people I was surrounded with. Now, I don't have that and I feel like the loner. The people here, my age, are so much nicer and better, and people I can learn from and whatnot. There are even guys can I potentially see myself getting to know. Problem is, if I'm gone in a short while, then no one truly gets to know me, and I feel like they would all be taken, and I'd be left to live alone, love-wise. Sure, I might have a good career and interact with people at my job, but as for friendship and on-the-side fun, I'd be the person that everyone says hi, what's up? to and that's it. Do you think it's wise to try to become involved in a relationship now? I don't really want to test the waters or anything and flirt around, I just really want one person. I think it would help me feel like I fit in more, but I don't really know anyone. But if I did get to know someone, do you think it's wise considering there is a chance I might not be living here in a few years for up to maybe 4+ years? (link)
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Lighten up on yourself a little bit. You are only 20 years old. Go out and get to know as many people as you can (I don't mean sleep with them) just hang out. There are so many advantages of this when you're young. #1 It helps you to be able to have friends #2 You stay busy, going places and doing fun and exciting things #3 You start to develop as sense of what you want in a mate by being around more people, you see traits in some that you love and in others that you detest #4 It takes the pressure off that's there when you're in a relationship, if you want to go out you can, if you don't, don't. This time period in your life should be filled with friends and making memories. Good luck in school and get out and let your hair down a little from time to time.
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Hello, my name is Laken. I am 16 years old, female, and consider myself above average in looks. I am 5"9' and blond hair brown eyed; I also model from time to time. When I was young and naive I fell in love with a man I truly believe to be my soul mate. He is 6"2' brown hair, tan, and his eyes are the color of the loveliest sea foam. He makes my heart stop, something no one ever does, but sometimes he hates me. Another thing no one else ever does. He can hate me from the very center of his core, but the moment I am in danger hes the first one there. How can he hate me so much but want to protect me more than anyone else? He has called me mean things and tries to knock me down a notch every chance he can get. Earning himself the nickname "The Devil". I don't know why I fell in love with him, but it's as if my feelings are going to rip apart my body. He acknowledged my feelings some time ago and as a result I lost my virginity to him. I have dated 2 men since him and its just not the same, the guys were sweet, but I wont settle for anyone I don't have feelings for. Shameful as it is to say he and I slept together last night. And I have a boyfriend. I feel terrible, but at the same time I don't feel like I should. My boyfriend cheated on his girlfriend with my best friend before we ever started dating, so i know hes a cheated and I don't trust him for it. I was in love with this man long before i ever met my boyfriend. I want to be with him forever. I am telling you all this because i am desperately in love with a man. And it hurts more than death. So my question is this, what should i do with my love for The Devil? (link)
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Honey you are very young and you seem so serious. You are being manipulated by this man. He has you convienced that he's superior to you. Like you should feel honored that he'd even notice you. Honey that's not love, that mental abuse. When someone loves you they want to help you be all that you can be. They support you and they have your back at all times, not just when there's danger and they'll come out looking to you like some hero (which will only make you feel more in-debted to them.) Nothing good can come of a relationship where you know already that he is mean and hates you at times and his name is "The Devil." Get away from him. Destroy all ways to contact him and don't let him make you feel unworthy or unlovable. IT'S NOT LOVE, IT'S MENTAL ABUSE!!
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so basically i had a boyfriend for a year, and we split up recently. i constantly felt like he was trying to make me jealous, but would brush it off because i was blinded by love. we broke up because i lied to him, because i felt threatened by other women. i know what i did was wrong, but now i want to know if there is a good way to apologize and keep our friendship? either that or make him want me again? im so confused, and either need ways to get him back...or ways to move on....please help me... (link)
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After a break up we go thru a grieving process similar to that of loosing a loved one in death. We tend to think of all the wonderful things that we remember about them and shared. I wonder if he really was trying to make you jealous. Some guys get a rush from getting a girl jealous and some guys are blatant flirts who think it should be ok for them to flirt with other women even tho they're in a committed relationship with you. So try to think logically--not emotionally. Did he ever actually give you real reason to be jealous? If he ever did, then don't go crawling back to him. If he didn't then you probably owe him an apology but don't beg/plead or grovel. If he want to forgive you, then he needs to forgive you and that needs to be the end of it. He doesn't need to punish you, I'm sure he's probably told you little white lies too. Girls sometimes get alittle dramatic when we try to get guys to take us back, I'd caution you to avoid taunting, stalking, calling repetitively, texting more than once, begging, blaming, cutting him down, or justifying your actions. Simply apologize, accept responsibility for your actions and let him know that you still care for him and if he ever can forgive you, you'd like a second chance. Good Luck.
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I'm a 17 years old male
My question is what is the difference between dating, boyfriend and girlfriend, and when a girl says she is together with you. I have met this girl of the same age as me and we started to get to know for about nine months. In that time I admitted I liked her, which caught her by surprise, but she started to begin to like me. I asked her out but she didn't respond because she didn't want to lose me as a friend or something ,but at the same time wanted to. So i asked her to the dance and she said yes in a flash despite the bunch of guys that asked her. Were both awkward people so we decided to learn to be closer to each-other for the dance, like holding hands and stuff. After the dance we continued this but started to kiss and stuff so i asked her if we were dating and she said no but that we were together. She told me it was too complicated with everything in her life that was happening to be dating but she said we were together. She then explained that being together had everything that a boyfriend and girlfriend could do just a different title, so she said we are indirectly dating. My question still remains what is the difference, because being together is like were dating but when people asks her if were are dating she says were not dating but that we are together. (link)
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Hmmmm, I'm older and Idk much about kids lingo but to me it would seem that what she's saying is... She wants you all to be casual friends who are not committed to each other and there are no rules about your relationship. I would call that "casual dating," meaning she can go out with you and hang out with you and have fun tonight but hang out with a different guy tomorrow night, and you can do the same with other girls, without breaking any rules. It's not an exclusive relationship like "boyfriend/girlfriend" it's just hangin out and getting to know each other better and keeping it light and having fun. It's actually a great idea. It gives you an opportunity to get to know a lot of different people. You are only 17 so you probably have very limited experience so it's a good way to learn what kinds of traits you find attractive in girls and what kinds of traits turn you off. It helps you to develop skills in communicating with the opposite sex too. Also, girls who aren't in a relationship with you will often be more open with you about what they would be attracted to as a mate and it's sort of like you get to be "in-the-loop" about what women want. It's an amazing opportunity to educate yourself about females. It also gives you freedom so when you find someone special that you want to be exclusive with, then you can still be friends with all the people that you've gotten to know and it's not awkward because they aren't past girlfriends. It's a win/win. Good Luck!!
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Sorry didn't know in what category to put this.well I'm 12 and I do modeling and this 16 year old girl doesn't it with me. I really like this guy and he's dating this 16 year old girl and me and her fight a lot and well yeah. Anyway that's not the point she's my role model and I want to be exactly like her!she dies her hair a lot but I'm not allowed she has the best body ever! She takes laxitives tho should I take that or is there any other ways to get a body like that?(I'm not fat I have a nice body but I want her body!)I'm even trying to talk and act like her! This isn't just to get the guy its also because I think if I'm more like her then maybe me and her can talk and stuff and then she won't hate me:( we used to talk but then I lied to her and then she got worried and told on and stuff but this was when I was 10/11 anyway how can I be more like her? Please don't just say be yourself I really need advice here! She's actually a brat but still and she says sorry like soraay and ok like okaay and stuff and yeah (link)
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Honey, it's normal to have someone a few years older than you that you look up to and sort of idolize. Her body is more mature than yours and even if you took laxatives (which is very stupid and will cause you serious medical problems if done too extremely) you couldn't have the same figure as she does. You are 12, your body has baby fat still stored for your maturation and you are just beginning to go thru puberty so your breasts and hips wouldn't be proportioned like hers either. If you are pretty enough to model, I'd say there's a ton of girls your own age who'd love to look just exactly like you do right now. You are seeking her approval because she is someone you look up to and idolize but because she is older than you she probably just sees you as a sweet, pretty, 12 year old and her focus is on impressing boys and outdoing girls her own age. I PROMISE YOU, THERE IS SOMEONE THAT SHE LOOKS/LOOKED UP TO JUST LIKE YOU LOOK AT HER. AND WHEN YOU GET HER AGE, THERE'LL BE A 12 YEAR OLD LOOKING AT YOU THE SAME WAY, THERE'S MANY 8,9,10 AND 11 YEAR OLDS WHO DO ALREADY.
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im 18 f
where to even begin... before i was dating my bf that im dating right now (lets call him x), me and this other guy( lets call him y) were together. he was really good to me, he treated me so well and liked me a lot but last new years we were at a party and y was very clingy so i ignored him until he left the party and instead i hooked up with x. y still really liked me but i didnt feel the same way about him at the time. about 2 months later me and x started dating and by that time me and y didnt even talk anymore. me and x had a great summer together, we went camping with our friends and had the best time and we got to know each other so much better. because we didnt start just as friends we went from not really knowing each other to dating. that summer i really fell inlove with x. but i saw him always talking to this girl on his phone and i never really asked him about her but it bugged me because i never really knew they were friends or even talked before. about a month ago me and y started talking again because we work together, and one night after work we sat on our cars and talked till 2 in the morning. but it wasnt y trying to break me and x up or y trying to impress me, we were strictly being just friends, and over the next few weeks we hung out and we became really good friends and i really realized how much i missed him. one night there was a work party that we were both at and i realized that the feelings i originally had for him were still there and even tho i still love x, y means alot to me still too. and that night he told me that he misses me and really likes me. he told me he will do anything for me and he respects my relationship with x but he wanted me to know that he would make me his everything. it really tore me and at the same time me and x were developing problems. it feels like x is taking me for granted and that he doesnt appreciate me, i have to ask him to have sex with me and sometimes he doesnt even want to, like it doesnt bother me that much but it sucks when i get blown off for sex. other things are that when we have sex he wont kiss me or make out with me while having sex with me :( it makes me feel like a hooker that he doesnt want to "make love" to but only to fuck. and he normally doesnt usually kiss me or make out with me on a daily basis. and when we do have sex he doesnt let me take my clothes off :( jsut pull my pants down and thats it. and y is making it seem that i deserve so much more and would make me feel appreciated. but me andx have been together for almost a year now and i love his friends and i love his family :( what do i do? :( im so lost it sucks. (link)
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Oh girl.... Dump the x..... Nothin in the world can ever take place of love making and if y is giving you a second chance you better jump on it and never take it for granted again.
But, don't just dump x and jump back in bed with y. Here is why.... Y likes you and right now he may think he's over the fact that you broke his heart but there may still be some trust issues you need to work thru. Try taking the physical love making off the table for a few months and focus on the relationship. (The trust, respect, love, attraction, etc.)
You see men fall in two different catagories, they either see you as a potential mate and they are ready to settle down OR they see you as a play mate and they don't want to be exclusive. If you begin the relationship as the later, you will never be able to conveince your man that you are the former. You want a man to "make-love" with you, you have to have a love connection. That takes a relationship men who are only looking to be play mates will not make that sort of emotional investment.
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Basically, I'm a 20 year old female in college who has had absolutely no experience with dating, sex, or relationships. I'm a person who takes a while to break out of my shell but in the end people love me and think I'm hilarious and fun and chill. I am NOT socially awkward but admittedly tense and nervous at times and I can be very reserved and guarded with people I don't know very well but all the while I'm kind and composed and collected. I can have a conversation with almost anyone. With every passing year this tension improves and my friends see this improvement in me. I'm not ugly, I have some attractive qualities and recently lost a good amount of weight! My best qualities have nothing to do with looks; I'm extremely intelligent, intellectual, interesting, sweet, and pretty funny. Right now, I feel more confident than ever! BUT I'm absolutely desperate for male intimacy. Having been deprived my whole life and watching my other friends get to experience it is very crushing. I have all this emotional and physical energy that wants so badly to be released but it can't be because no guy has ever shown interest in me. Now for the main issue: I think I may be falling hard for one of my friends. He made a girlfriend over the summer and now they have a (very) long distance relationship. I had a crush on him last year but knew that getting him would probably not be a reality, considering the fact that other girls sometimes like him and he's shy with girls and I just don't want to get hurt or have my confidence destroyed. Ever since this year started he's been paying tons of attention to me. He's a friendly, charming person by nature so I don't know if I'm special at all. As a result, I unfortunately think I've fallen in love with him (or whatever to call it). I cannot stop thinking about him and get sad when I can't be around him. Sexually, I want him so bad like no one I've ever lusted after before. The main aspect is the emotional connection we have. He is literally everything I want, he's perfection. The issue is that he has a long-distance girlfriend. He's wishy washy and I have no idea what he is really thinking. All I can do in all of this is speculate which leaves me to go crazy. I just can't stop thinking negatively and crying over the fact that the odds may not be in my favor and that I have no strength or experience with any of this. I am a smart, strong, independent person and right now I feel helpless. I'm so confused with all of the new things I'm feeling and having so many highs and lows. What do I do? (link)
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ok "in love and confused" first of all, you're 20 years old. Lighten up, have some fun. Don't get too serious about anything. Just have some fun. It's not too likely that you're going to make it to the alter with the first guy you have a relationship with and the chances of you getting out of life without having your heart broken at least once are very slim. Best thing to do is to realize your own self worth and know that this guy may not even realize you're attracted to him. Let him know in subtle ways without throwing yourself at him that you think he's delish. But don't sophocate him. Make your 1:1 encounters with him short and sweet then excuse yourself for some business you must attend to. For example, pay him a compliment on the way he looks or smells then excuse yourself to do some very important thing. Or get involved in a conversation where you're asking him questions about where he grew up and what he enjoys doing for fun and what his favorite foods are. Make the conversation all about him and but cut it short before you run out of juicy conversation and loose his interest. Guys like to be seen and feel like someone gives a crap about what they want and like but they also like it when the girl seems to have a life. so that's why you don't let the conversation run stale before you excuse yourself to do something important or meet another friend. etc. Good luck love.
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okay, like..we talk everyday afterschool and he always tells me to go visit him during his break at work since i live like right across the street from his job, so i do. but like,at school we'll see each other and we'll only say hi , and then when we arent at school and we're hanging out he's like, a complete flirt and he's super sweet and stuff. i feel like he's hiding me or something. but then i dont because his cousin knows about me and since me and his cousin are good friends he tells me that he (the guy i have a thing with) always talks about me and says im amazing , and that he really , really likes me and all this other cute stuff.
so i really am considering your previous advice because he makes me like the happiest person ever and like, straight up makes everything more fun and entertaining, but uggghh why doesnt he show it at school!? haha (link)
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Well love, If he only wants to be with you when he's not around other people, it's quite possible that he likes you as a friend or for casually sex but not as a relationship girl. So don't sell yourself short. If he's keeping you a secret, he's just not that into you and if you are looking for a relationship, don't give yourself to him until you are sure he's into an exclusive relationship with you. Don't have casual sexual encounters with him expecting that cause him to fall for you, you could be the best sex he's ever had and if he isn't ready for a relationship, you won't be able to change his mind. You have to know what YOU want from the relationship and don't give yourself away for less.
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F/22 Boyfriend is 21
My and my boyfriend have been together for a little over a year now. Things were so perfect in the beginning! And even up to a couple months ago they were still perfect. He is an amazing guy, basically the dream guy. Would do sweet things for me, would always want me in his arms, would always kiss me and remind me how much he loves me. Would drop everything if I needed him.
Well, lately that's not been the case :( He's been really stressed lately about several things. I'm pretty sure the number one stresser is things that are happening with his family. I'm also stressed. About several things. But lately its been seeming like our stress is ruining our relationship. We fight, like every day. He's not the same person he used to be. I feel unwanted. I always have to ask him for a kiss, he never lays with me anymore, and when I absolutely need him he won't be there for me. I don't know what has gotten into him. And I know he's not cheating on me i'm 100% positive, he's not that kind of guy.
I'm still so in love with him. All I want to do is try to talk things out. But every time I try to say how I'm feeling he'll say "Why are you bringing this up." or "Why are you always trying to start a fight." "I don't want to talk about this." He doesn't get that I'm not trying to start a fight, I'm trying to fix our relationship! I know he still loves me, because he hasn't let me go and he tells me he will always love me no matter what. I'm being pushed aside, and basically being forced to hide my feelings and emotions cause he doesn't wanna talk about it and figure things out. How can I get him to realize that in order for our relationship to be better, we have to make changes and talk things out.
We're not ready to let this relationship go, but fighting every day is not acceptable. (link)
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"To be understood, you must first seek to understand" Christian Carter. I read Christian Carter's e-book. It has a lot of bs but it also has some sound advise. Especially when it comes to communication and how we women try to get men to understand us by trying to "Convience them that we are right" he says it like buying a new car. We all would love to buy a new car but no one wants to be SOLD a new car. We are automatically turned off by the pressure that we feel from the other person when they are trying to conveince us to do something. So first seek to understand his point of view and offer yourself up to him. Ask yourself, "How can I make this situation easier for him?" Once a few of the stressors are off his plate and he no longer feels pressure from you, he'll be much more open to doing something playful with you which is the ultimate goal because that's where the connection starts back up for the man. They want light, fun, easy love. It's hard to be deep. Also be careful not to sophocate him right now. If he has a lot going on, he may not be able to be at your beckon call. Find other avenues of fulfillment, go out with your girlfriends, it's unfair to ask him to meet all your emotional needs. He sounds like a great guy and you seem to love him very much. Good luck love.
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Since childhood i was made to feel worthless (from father)i was 2nd &reminded of who i wasnt &a glimpse of me would be told off for daring to be someone else but who i tried to be was me.from there i put myself in mysery to fight for my dignaty ,whith handfulls of happiness ,laughing to me is such joy when it happens i relish it.My biggest problem as an adult is i have 5children&apartner &as a family im the leader to outings but any invites to anybody ,i excuse myself ,i have anxiety but its having to communicate that il reherse if its an unbreakable commitment ,&if i let myself be seen mentally i feel a second of relief the shame&anger for lettin my thoughts out why (link)
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Have you ever sought professional help to deal with you past? If issues from the past haunt you, even subconciously, they will hold you back emotionally, psychologially and socially. I was sexually mistreated as a child from the second grade until I was 13 y/o. I never told a living sole. Later, when my oldest child was near the same age that I was when the sexual mistreatment had started with me, I began acting out sexually, not realizing that it was at all related to the fact the my past was coming back to get me because I'd never dealt with it. I was subconciously afraid that my son would have the same experience and also I had tons of guilt and still blamed myself and carried a ton of shame for my past, which I had no control over. I ended up being diagnosed as a sex addict, it cost me my (14 year) marriage, I spent a year in therapy and 9 days on the emotional health unit at the hospital. It's been excutiating but I've began to deal with it. I'm an RN so being admitted to the "Psych Ward" was a scary thought for me. I actually feared that I'd loose my nursing license but let me tell you, it's been the best thing that I could've ever done. I did it for me. I did it for my children. You also need to seek help. Work thru all that old stuff so you can be the best father to those beautiful children that you can be. You are obviously sincere about getting help or you wouldn't have posted your question on here. Just take that step. You wont regret it. TRUST ME.
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21/f. So there's this boy in my class. he's 24. And he is such a flirt. He always stares at me. We joke around a lot, and we've become pretty close. He always stares at me and i'll ask him why he always stares at me, and he'll just smile at me. I stare at him too. so yeah. He ooked right at me when i walked into class once, and was smiling at me, but i didn't look at him and i just rolled my eyes. haha. But my only thing is that in the past i'd get too excited and start assuming things and end up getting my heart broken :/ Yesterday we worked on our project together, and then when we were finished he said he had to take care of some business, and that he'll come back and check on me. So he came back and i was taking a quiz and he helped, and we talked. I thought it was sweet, but i wasn't sure if he was just being nice maybe? Like i said before i don't want to jump to conclusions. What do you think? Does he like me? Should i see where this goes? I am not sure if he likes me, or if he even has time for a girlfriend if he's even remotely interested in me since he works a lot. so yeah. (link)
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Thanks for your comment, Sorry I misinterpretted your question when you said "he's such a flirt" I thought you meant he was a flirt in general. Sorry again.
OK. Dear "does he like me?" guys think different than girls. There are men who are ready for a relationship and there are guys who just want to date, hang out, have fun, have a roll in the hay but nothing exclusive. If he's flirtatious with multiple girls, it's probably the later so watch his body language around other chicks. Don't sell yourself short either. If you are looking for a relationship, you won't be able to change his mind to be ready for a relationship if he is still wanting to keep things light and have fun with multiple partners. You MUST know what you want and don't ever ever settle for less. Once you've slept with him casually, you'll never be able to go back and change him to see you as someone he may want to be exclusive with. That must be established in the beginning. If you and him end up dating a few times and you feel like it may lead to more you need to let him know that you only sleep with men that you are exclusive with, if that's truly how you feel.
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So I met this guy last April and we started dating by May. Everything with him is perfect. I am always so comfortable around and we know absolutely everything about each other. We talk on the phone for at least 4 hours a day, since I'm at school. He's a few years older. But lately I feel like all the amazing passion and love from the beginning of our relationship is gone. I recently read over our old texts to each other and I got such a horrible feeling in my stomach because our relationship is so different now. I know I feel the same and it isn't really on my end. For example he used to tell me he loved me so many random times throughout the day and now I'm the only one who ever says it. I asked him about it once and he said thats how It has always been, that I am always the one who says it first. He didn't even try to change things since he knew it was bothering me. He never EVER says I'm beautiful. Which i would never expect or nag him about. The fact that he used to always say it kind of hurts though. I don't think the fact I am away at school changed feelings because when we met we did the long distance thing for the first few months. I have some problems with his family too. His older brother is getting married and whenever we are all at dinner they only talk to her like I'm not there. He says they ask about me all the time though. But whenever I email his mom to talk she just tells me how she is and doesn't take interest in me. I brought this topic of our relationship not having any spark up to him and he told me its because our relationship is different. He said don't worry about it. The fact that he wasn't concerned either makes me nervous. I love him so much and I know that phase of our relationship or any relationship doesn't last forever but its just changed TOO much compared to the other relationships I have been in.
I'm just confused as to what to think of his response to this topic.
Sorry this was long. And thanks SO much for any advice/opinions. I really appreciate it. (link)
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Hmmmmm. Dear "All the passion is gone".... We've all been there. That phase don't last forever but it shouldn't totally go away. If you've mentioned it to him and he's blowing you off then maybe he's telling you something without saying it. It's normal for men to pull away at certain stages of the relationship and you will never be able to CONVIENCE him to change the way he thinks about things. No one ever likes to be convienced that they are wrong. It's kind of like being sold something. We all like to buy new things but NO ONE likes to be sold anything. A relationship with no passion is a disaster, trust me. You will never get what you need from a dead relationship. Been there! Done that!... It Don't work!!.
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I like this guy in my class, and I think he likes me too. All the signs are there; he talks to me a lot, he comes over to me first when he has a question about something, he sits next to me whenever he can, etc.
So, my question is - what should I do to show him that I like him too? Note - I've had problems in the past with being TOO obvious, & not just to the guy, the whole class. This time (after practicing with a "crush" on some jerk in my class, just to see if I could be less obvious --- an incredible success by the way) I'm doing a pretty good job at making it very subtle, yet visible, & I don't want to break my streak.
So I want to know if anyone out there has a strategy or something that would help me with this. My goal is to show him that I like him, maybe even flirt a bit, & not to get him to be freaked out and run away, like the other guys I scared away...
Thanks to everyone who answers in advance! & I hope you have an amazing day! :) (link)
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ABSOLUTE BEST STRATEGY..... Limit the amount of time you spend in conversation with him at every encounter but say something that'll make him think of you later in the day. You could for example compliment his eyes or hair or clothes in a very matter of fact way then say, excuse me I have to go meet with my friend such and such. Next time you talk to him talk about how he always makes you laugh and he's incredible hilarious but then excuse yourself because you have something you must take care of. You see what I'm doing there? Make the conversation totally about him, girls are so into themselves and it's a nice change for a guy for the girl to SEE them, but then nothing is more impressive to a guy then for a girl to have her own life and to be able to keep herself intertained and have fun so immediately making yourself unavailable is a turn on to them and trust me... he'll be thinking of your sweet face later on in the day.
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So this guy pursued me majorly for a month and a week. We didn't sleep together immediately but eventually did. We've had awesome dates, great conversation, decent sex and a lot of fun together. I think things were moving too fast for him but he seemed to go along with it until after the fact. I emailed him a sweet message. He emailed me back a nice but less gushy message (Tuesday night). I didn't hear from him at all the next day (W) or today (Thurs) so today I sent him a text because I know he'll be gone for the weekend and it's not like him not to call. He's sick busy and getting ready for a trip but the thing is if it were me I'd still text or something. He's not a big texter. Doesn't get texts even sent to his phone but he's been so good about calling in the past that this is new and I think he's pulling back. What do I do?
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Get busy.... Do some of your favorite activities with your best girlfriend and enjoy the heck out of yourself. Nothing sexier to a man than a woman who can keep herself intertained and have fun without having to have him holding your hand. Wait for him to contact you.... maybe even miss his first call or so..... Give him the gift of missing you for once. Something about it is a real turn on to a guy. You're just a cool girl who knows how to have fun and you don't have to have him or any other dude to help you with it. You waiting around for him just makes you appear to be emotionally immature... like you need his presence, approval or contact to validate who you are. But you don't you see you are able to have fun without him.... so go do it!!!!
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