i had this boyfriend about a half year ago and he took my cherry but cheated on me a month later. and then broke up with me. it really stung and i never got over him. i was mad at him for lying, and it nearly drove me over the edge.
we kept in touch for a while and reconciled our friendship. he asked me back out about 2 weeks ago. but the problem is i dont trust anything he says. we just had a fight because he told me he had something i really wanted, but wanted me to tell him something that i did the other night that i wouldnt tell him. i told him and he felt "bad" and told me the thing he had was a fake and said that he thought i'd tell him a lie.
i dont lie to him! the only thing i would lie about is if im feeling ok or if im happy. im a very depressed person but i dont want to worry him. and i told him that.
how is he supposed to earn my trust back?? what should i do? im really head over heels for this guy and we have a lot of fun and hes just really special to me and i dont want to lose him but i know i will if i can never trust him.
From what you have said, I firmly believe that this guy does not deserve you. Firstly, you need to understand that no one deserves to be cheated on and your situation would be especially difficult. If you are already feeling unhappy, this guy will either make that worse or you will become too attached to him and suffer immensely if you break up again. The day you realize you are independent and truly ready to be in a relationship is the day you should consider getting back together with him.
But then again, by that time you will be feeling confident and ready to explore new options. Once you overcome your emotions and feel happy you may be able to have a great friendship with him; however, even if you forgive him for cheating, I advise against forgetting what he did. He hurt you which likely took your self-confidence down a notch or two.
The reason you are having a hard time trusting him is because he does not deserve your trust. Right now he has power and control over this relationship. He cheated, you hurt, he left, you hurt more, he came back, and now you feel like you are the one with a problem because you don't trust him. Honestly, I wouldn't trust him either. You didn't deserve to be cheated on in the first place, no matter what the situation was.
This problem is deeper than it seems from a first glance. I know you are asking about him but you should be putting your energy into making yourself feel good first. Wouldn't you love to know that no matter what happens, you'll be okay? It takes confidence and strength. It sounds challenging, but it is the only thing you need to worry about, everything else will fall into place once you're self-confident.
If you have any questions involving how to be self-confident or relating to this question, feel free to ask me and I'll do my best to help you! No matter what you decide, good luck and keep in mind that you deserve a guy that will not make you feel upset or bad about yourself.
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okayy
so there's this guy
and me and him were good friends
and we had this thing going on
and everyone started someing up to us and asking us if we were going out
and we'd be like noo
but now he seems like he's ignoring me
and i don't know why
i see him looking over at me a few times
from the corner of his eye
but idk
he still talks to me too
i know he used to like me
but idk about now
i think he does still
but he's sending mixed signals
today he was flirting with this girl right in front of me
and he never really flirts with her
soo i was wondering if he likes me and that's why he's avoiding me
He is definitely sending some mixed signals here. Maybe he likes you, or maybe he doesn`t and he`s worried about ruining your friendship - it`s hard to tell sometimes. If he is flirting with a girl infront of you he could be trying to make you jealous. If he has been acting this way for more than a week or two, you could casually ask him if something is wrong but he may not tell you the truth.
If you`d like, you could try being really friendly by inviting him to hang out with you (just the two of you, if that`s possible). If he used to like you (or still does) he would be more likely to be clear about it when it`s just the two of you.
When a guy starts sending mixed signals like that it can be really confusing. You should avoid sending mixed signals yourself by being friendly and flirty but not over the top. When you two hang out, gently brush against him (ie, your arm against his) and look directly into his eyes when you smile, then look away, then look back. Subtle clues like that will show him that you`re interested. Maybe he is just nervous and doesn`t intend to seem like he is avoiding you.
Good luck, just be remember to avoid sending mixed signals back, but don`t be too forward right away. If you feel like things are improving, you can tell him you like him as more than a friend. If you have anymore questions, feel free to ask me! :)
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this girl we dated 1 time and we were happy and now i wish to date her again but she is kinda sad that i broke up with her last time i told her never will that happin again i love her i no she loves me what should i do plz help????????????? thanks
It`s best if the two of you can meet up in person and discuss this. Explain to her why you want to get back together with her - give her specific reasons. If possible, explain to her why you broke up in the first place and relate it to how you two can ensure it won`t happen again. The best way to convince her is by showing you how much you care by using specific examples. Let her know what is great about her and how much you appreciate her.
If you`d like, you could try to convince her to go on one special date with you to see if it`s worth trying to be together again. Put some thought into the date. Since it`s winter, going out into the snow, going skating, or warming up inside infront of the fire are all seasonally appropriate ideas. No matter what you do, be sure to tell her WHY you`d like to be back together and HOW you`re going to make it work this time. She will appreciate the care and effort you put into your relationship. Good luck!
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I'm 17 Female, and my bestfriend in the entire world is also 17 but Male.
I've known him since kindergarten (14years) and we've been best friends the whole time, now I kinda want to be more then friends but I don't know if he'll take it seriously when I tell him.
Telling him's not the issue I can do that bit..
If you feel that you are ready to risk the relationship that you already have by introducing the element of romance, you must do it convincingly. The best way to tell him is when the two of you are alone together. Try to be in a place that is meaningful to the two of you. He may be more inclined to feel the same way if you have a fun day of hanging out then settle in to watch a movie in the evening. Just make sure the few hours before have been fun.
Once you two are alone and feeling good about being together one-on-one, tell him WHY you enjoy it. The best way to be convincing is to not only tell him you`d wish to become more than friends, but tell him why. Think of these reasons before you tell him, if possible. These reasons may include something about how close you two are from knowing eachother for 14 years and how it allows you to trust him, if applicable.
If you give him specific reasons why you want to be more than friends, you have the best chance of having him take it seriously. If he is unsure, don't pressure him or feel upset. You two obviously have a great relationship as friends and there is nothing wrong with that! Good luck :)
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My best friend, who i have been "talking" to for about 6 months now thinks i hooked up with his friend. he is really convinced and will not believe me. theres not much i can say besides i didnt do it. he said he needs to think about it. i just need some advice on how to let him know i care about him, and wouldnt do that. even better, if he does decide to forgive me, how do i gain his trust?
If he isn`t quick to believe what you`re telling him, it`s time to try a new approach. You should show him that you care. Set up a time for the two of you to be alone together and get some time to talk. You could go for a walk to a quiet place & look at the clouds or stars, out for coffee/etc, or out for lunch/dinner. After spending some quality time together wait for a good moment to tell him exactly WHY you care about him (what is really great about him?) and let him know that you would never want to risk losing him.
Give him some time to think if he says he needs it, but continue to show interest in the situation to show your dedication to your friendship. You can also try asking him how you can make him feel more comfortable with what you are trying to tell him. Showing this much interest in what has happened shows that you really care.
Be confident, if you believe in what you are trying to tell him it will all work out. Once he forgives you just continue to spend him with him and demonstrate that you are a dedicated, caring friend and you wouldn`t do anything to hurt him. Good luck, if you need any clarification or further advice feel free to ask me! =)
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so i am a sixteen year old incoming senior. I have a good group of close friends and a large group of acquaintances. I get along with basically everyone. I can be shy in certain circustsnces but for the most part I'm outgoing and like being around people. For this summer I'm hostessing at a restaurunt at the beach, three hours away from home. I'm living with my older brother. My boss always compliments me and is in disbelief that I'm only sixteen. A group of friends also live and work here for the summer aswell.
I am pretty normal when it comes to my looks. I'm quite skinny, have naturally straight blonde hair, blue/green eyes. My friends say I have a cute butt, and that it makes up for my lack of breast-age. My skin is pretty good and I dont wear make up, glasses or braces. I'm average in height aswell and my style is preppy skater esque. I probably look like I walked straight out of a pacsun magazine.
So basically I'm cute and fun to be around, yet still mature for my age. Sounds like I have no problem right? Wellllll, I do. When it comes to guys and/or a love life, its non-existent. At home, all of my friends are in relationshops. And whenever I would have a crush on a guy a friend would hang out with him and they would start dating, or he would at least like her and forget about me. Its happened 4 times with my friends from home. Now I'm at a beach with my beach friends. Its kinda the same deal just worse. Its like I'm invisible to the guys here. My four best girlfriends from here hang out withthe lifeguards and the guardshave falling in love with them. I've met themand they kinda just brushed me off.
So I met this boy named andrew because he works at the icecream shop with two of my friends. Hes 17 and also a senior. My friends were all into getting him and I together. So we met and hung out and I got a crush on him. Now he likes one of the girls who was tryin to set me up with him, and she kinda likes him too. So basically I just cant figure out why guys arenot interested in me. My friends are better then me or it seems that way. Also, I always seem to develop crushes on guys, never is it a guy has a crush on me. And with my friends its always boy likes girl, and then girl is like okay! Does that make sense?
so idk, maybe some advice about getting boys to notice and/or like me...maybe thoughts about why they dont...idk. I'd talk about it toy friends but they'd just be like but we love you! And basically it does really suck and hurt and down goes my self esteem...thanks! :/
Btw I'm on my itouch so sorry for any spelling mistakes.
Well, you almost have what it takes to have guys lining up at your door to meet you. You know yourself quite well and you know your strengths/weaknesses. Now all you need is some time to become comfortable with who you are and to improve yourself in any way possible. If you become slightly more confident you will begin thinking differently.
Instead of worrying about why guys may or may not like you, you will be focussed on your life. When you life live for YOURSELF rather than for other people you can really become a great person. You should focus on developing the person you want to be - this happens naturally with time but you can speed up the process if becoming your personal best is of importance to you.
Don`t be afraid to challenge yourself. Wish you were a little more outgoing? Ask a cute stranger (guy) for directions. Just become comfortable approaching people in a less than intimidating situation. From what I`ve heard, guys love it when a girl is brave enough to make the first move. It shows that you are confident enough to approach a guy without worrying about rejection.
You may have the most wonderful, attractive friends in the world, but you`ll never meet your full potential if you are worried about matching up to someone else`s standards. If you live off of your own schedule and follow your dreams guys will see that you are not in a desperate search for a 'man' to fill the void in your life - now that`s attractive!
If you haven`t noticed already the process of becoming likable is about working on yourself. After spending some time to work on yourself you`ll be feeling great. Don`t search for the perfect guy, let him find you. If you demonstrate that you are confident and attractive (not just looks, your personality is what really needs to be attractive) guys will really start to notice you. I suggest that you make a list of everything your ideal 'self' would be and let it guide you.
Don`t worry about becoming 'fake' just because you set goals for who you want to be. Your preferences come from your desires and your desires come from your truest self. What I mean is that if you believe that being outgoing is a good trait then it has come from your true self and you can become it. I say this because people tend to pick up on the slightest 'changes' in others (mostly due to jealousy or fear of being overshadowed) .. in other words, don`t let anyone tell you that you are 'changing' because it is coming from within and its in your best interest.
My final few tips are more specific to attracting guys. Make sure you are always putting effort into your appearance as it shows that you care about yourself - & you never know when you might meet a nice guy! Continue to be friendly, this makes you more approachable, and it always helps if you smile. Don`t be afraid to start a conversation with the guy you are interested in. If you meet a guy you like don`t play hard to get, but don`t always be available either - you should have your own life and goals.
If you do meet a guy or already know one that you`d like to attract, feel free to send me a question that is more specific to the situation & I will try to help you out. Good luck =)
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I started dating this guy about a month ago. We met at a bar and hit it off right away. We just became exclusive this past weekend, and I was really happy.
Unfortunately, a bundle of shitty relationships has got me paranoid about everything in a relationship. I've dated many guys, but always hesitated when it came to having an actual boyfriend.
If he doesn't call, I assume that something is wrong. Not even about him dating other girls or whatever-- but more so, the fact that he could change his mind at any moment, and I'll be back to nothing. It's clear that we want each other, when we're with each other. But, any time in between I spend wondering why he's not calling, and if it's because I did something wrong and it gave him second thoughts.
I don't want to push him away, or sabotage the relationship like I have in the past. I like this guy a lot and I want to make the most out of it and not worry about what he's thinking all the time.
So to my question.. what is it that keeps a guy from waiting so long to make a call? If it takes more then a few hours, when is it okay to just call him? It feels new, and awkward. But it mostly feels like maybe we rushed into things since I'll still too uncomfortable with my security.
Help?
I don`t think the important matter here is calling. I`ll try not to make this too long, but what do you want from a relationship? You don`t want stress, that`s for sure. If something happens and it doesn`t work out you need to realize that you don`t NEED him, you live your own life. With that mindset you can go into the relationship with less worry, and therefore, you will enjoy it more. Just take a deep breath and realize a relationship should benefit your life, not take away from it. If he doesn`t call, go do something you enjoy doing. If it happens more than once that he doesn`t call, just phone him up the next day and ask if everythings alright. By having your own life and not needing him you will keep him more interested anyways! Trust him entirely, anything he does won`t hurt you too much. If it`s not meant to be, it won`t happen - I don`t think anyone can argue that. If he does something to lose your trust move on with your life and leave him. You shouldn`t have to worry that he has bad intentions or he will change his mind - that`s not why you want a relationship, is it? You want someone that you will enjoy spending him with. Basically, keep control over your life and emotions. If this relationship isn`t benefitting your life then you don`t need it. With that said all you need to do is relax a bit and see if things work out for the best. Good luck =)
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Im 13 Years Old I've Had Many Bad Boyfriends.This Year I Met A Guy Named Freddy He's 14.I've Liked Him For 10 Months Now.We Really Got To Know Earlier In The Year & EVERYONE Was Saying He Was Into Me.The Day I Was going to Ask Him Out He Started Going Out WIth Another Girl Which Got Me Really Confused because We Started Out So Strong &Had Everythin In Common.Throughout This Year I've Had Many Guys Ask Me Out & I Said No because I Cant Get Over Freddy. Im Still Not Over Him & Now He Is Single & Im Too Scared To Ask Him Out because I Dont Know If He Likes Me Anymore Or If He Ever Did Like Me.Im Really Heartbroken because This Happens To Me Everytime & I Really Think He's The One.I dont Want Another Guy because I See Everything In Him. Now I Hurt Myself.I Began Cutting Myself About 2 Weeks Ago because The Year Is Ending & I Wont See Him Next Year. Im Also Getting Sick Over It Lately I Havnt Been Eating Well & I Cant Sleep & Im Always Crying Or Throwing Up From Crying So Much.I Just Cant Let Him Go.He Doesnt Know Im Upset Or That Im Cutting Myself Really Badly.I Cant Get Over Him I Feel Like Dying Is The Way Outta This Pain That I Feel. How Do I Make It Stop.
If Anyone Wants To IM Me On AIM Its 2:25 AM Right Now & Im Still Up I'll Probually Be Up The Rest Of The Night But Feel Free To IM Me My SN is
XxLuv HaRdCoRexX
This negative energy needs to stop. You have to come to terms with yourself before you deal with this. YOU are the only person that you can ever rely on for your happiness. Hoping on external sources (such as Freddy) will leave you desperately vunerable. You need some quality time alone, in my opinion. You absolutely MUST quit cutting yourself. Somewhere inside you`re an amazing person. You care so much for Freddy and that is honourable. However, you cannot let it run your life. Self-abuse ruins your self-esteem and self-confidence.
You need to work on yourself. Do not make yourself suffer by cutting or feeling really down. It`s okay to be sad, but it means you need time to appreciate yourself. Grab a happy movie, your favourite snack, & a box of tissues. You need some time to get in touch with how you feel rather than letting it overwhelm you. All of this stress is not good for your health, either. Take a night to relax, then get a good nights rest. When you feel up to it, spend some time with your family and friends to get your mind off of this. Be nice to yourself, you deserve it.
Once you`ve regained your appreciation for yourself, your life, and your self-esteem you can take action. You need to talk to Freddy, but it doesn`t need to be a serious, intimidating talk. Compliment him, you can tell him what`s great about him. This shows your interest and that you really appreciate who he is as a person. You can do this over the phone or computer because you will not be able to see him. Let him know that you`d love to spend time with him when you two get the chance.
If you really feel the need, tell him you really like him. Otherwise you really should spend the summer enjoying focussing on yourself. Once you build your self-confidence up again you`ll feel way better. Your personality will be able to shine through. Love yourself and others will come to love you as well.
Take control back over your life and emotions and the heartbreak will fade. Relationships, especially in the teen years, are supposed to be for enjoyment. To make you happy. Spending time with a boyfriend is supposed to be fun and an opportunity to become close and trusting with someone. Don`t stress too much, you have your whole life ahead of you and there are going to be many situations which are less than great. It`s how you deal with them and how you feel about yourself which ultimately determine how happy you are.
If you need more advice, let me know. Sorry, I do not have AIM, but I will try to help you however possible. Now go, enjoy summer, enjoy your life, enjoy being yourself, take control of your life, and finally, remember you deserve happiness so go ahead and get it.
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me and my boyfriend landon really like each other. we have those little fights about whos cuter or who loves each other more. and at school, WE ARE SERIOUSLY ALL OVER EACH OTHER! we tell each other that we love each other. hes all i can think about. and he tells his friends, that he loves me and that all he can think about is me. i really miss him alot, and im going to see him tomorrow. so, does it sound like were in love, or...are we just really close in our relationship?
-shelby/13/f
Do you really need a label for this close relationship? It depends what you consider love to be. As a teenager, it is unrealistic to commit yourself to one person for the rest of your life. Sure, you could say you love eachother.. but at age thirteen it isn`t 'adult' love. Just be happy that you are so happy being together, and don`t let anyone decide what your relationship is. Good luck in your relationship & I hope this answer helps! =)
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Is one kiss considered "cheating"?
Absolutely. Cheating can be emotional and physical. Although a kiss isn't too physical, it will definately emotionally hurt your partner. Trust issues will arise and this may lead to other problems.
If you have kissed someone other than your partner you need to be serious about not doing it again and giving your partner time to trust you again.
If you have a partner who kissed someone other than you, you need to let them know how much it hurt you and that if it happens again you may need to end the relationship. Make sure they don't rush you into trusting them again.
Finally, do whatever you are comfortable with. If you feel like the relationship needs to end, have a talk with your partner. I suggest working through it, if you both are serious it can be resolved.
Good luck!
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14/f
Everyone tells me this kid likes me, but when it comes to seeing if people like me or not, I can never ever tell!
Here are some signs --
*He calls me twice a day.
*He talks about how he misses what we had.
*He always says we should hang out
*Hes called me pretty 3 times, in the past like.. maybe week tops?
*He asked if I'd ever makeout with him... lol?
*He always tries to help me with things.
*He drops like everything, just to talk to me on the phone type thing..
& alot of other stuff.. I just can't seem to think of it right now. =/ but, trust me theres alot more.. thats just super recent. & some of the other things, I don't know how to put it.
Anyways, what do you think? Does he just want to be my friend? or more...
By the way.. I won't rate you low, if you think he doesn't like me or something.. I want you to be completely honest.
OH..& sorry if we're not allowed to say we rate at all? I thought it was just as long as we don't say we rate high...
kthanks in advance.
Hey! The signs are there - this boy is interested in you. He clearly enjoys talking to you/being with you and is trying to make it more frequent. If you like him, he seems kind (helping you), dedicated (dropping other things for you) and what not, so go for it! Good luck. =)
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ok i kno everyone's tired of christmas but i don't know what to get my gf!
help!
she's 14/f
thanks!
Giftcards, bath sets, flowers, a hand written note, something you baked, jewelry (bracelet, necklace, earrings), jewelry box or something along those lines.
Ask her, her friends or her parents what she would like. Or walk into a store and ask what they sell that a 14 year old girl would like.
Try wrapping the gift in a nice box with a bow on top. Make it special and take time and care to make it look good. She will love the little details!
Hopefully that helps! :)
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What are some signs (big signs and also just the little ones) to tell that your ex boyfriend likes you again?
Please help :)
It varies a lot but here is a good list
- looking at you constantly
- being jealous when you are with other guys
- calling you or talking to you often
- acting differently in any way to you
But do remember, they are your ex for a reason. If this is a case where you may like them again do consider why you broke up in the first place.
Good luck :)
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i think i like this guy but i dont know, how are you sure if u like something?
13/f
ill rate. thanks
Hey
At your age and for the next few years you will find that you like someone when you get butterflies when you see them or hear their voice. If you can't stop glancing at them or they make you nervous, chances are you like them. If you want to hold hands, hug or kiss them you like them.
After the next few years you may develop wanting to share you secrets with them and have them tell you theirs as a clue that you like them. If they treat you well and you make eachother happy that is another sign.
Overall, if you enjoy being around them and want to be closer (talk to eachother more and spend more time together) you like them.
Good luck with the guy :)
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idiot! i just talked to my old-crush online, and i have this weird feeling now. like i hate him. im bitter, i think. ugh! i wrote him an email a while ago, and now i asked him howcome he never answered? (it was just a polite email, like "hey its been a while, how's life?") and he was really rude about it!! and then we kept talking, and got into a discussion.. nd after a while he said "you know what, im not in the mood to talk to you to be honest" and he was just.. a complete jerk. so i was like "whatever dude, bye" and he said "bye bye now" and now we're both online, not talking to eachother, and im staring at his screenname with.. anger, i think. im not sure what it is i feel but i dont like it. i hate him, i hate myself. i feel so inferior now, just help me please! what do i do?
I have had this happen to me. You really should block and delete him. He isn't worth your time. This guy will never change and he must be a jerk. No one deserves to be treated like that. No matter what his reason, there's no way he should be so rude.
Are you sure you want to like a guy who makes you feel bad? I think you know the answer. You deserve better.
Good luck, though :)
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i got this friend he is bi but he dont wont to come out the closet what should my friend do
No matter what you do, make sure you take into account his feelings. He is probably unsure about his sexuality and it is an unstable topic for him.
Do not force him to tell anyone, when he is ready he will do it on his own.
For now just accept him for who he is.
:)
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15/M Do girls like guys that wear cologne? Would they like a 15 year old with cologne? I've heard that girls don't like it because cologne reminds them of their dad or grandpa. I was just wondering.
As long as you don't wear too much you will probably get a a good reaction from girls. Just keep in mind everyone is different, but my opinion is that it is good. :)
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if a girl would come to you, cryin, and saying she has to come clean about something..she's been manipulating you to get you to like her. she convinced herself it was ok to hack you and read your emails because she cares about you and she was jealous..but now she's sorry. she says she regrets it, and is coming clean because she loves you and knows you deserve it.
what would you do? forgive her for respecting you enough to come clean? tell her you want nothing to do with her because she's been decieving you and you don't need that kind of drama in your life? or just completely ignore her because it's kind of creepy how you barely know eachother and she likes you THAT much and is obsessed to that degree..
?
keep in mind, we are not in a relationship, she just has a "deep crush" for me.
thank you
Well, you're right about that "deep crush" part. As a girl, I know I have wished that I had known what a guy was saying about me. She probably cares a lot about you, she may or may not be taking it too far. She is willing to do anything to find out if you feel the same about her. Since she told you, and didn't keep it a secret, she is probably a very trustworthy person if you ever were to date her.
It all depends on how you felt about her before this happen. Before you found out. Stick with those feelings, thats how you really feel about her. If you liked her (as a friend) tell her that, but make sure she knows nothing more. If you disliked her, be nice, but let her know how you feel. And finally, if you had strong feelings for her, you are guaranteed that she cares a lot about you, will do anything for you and will be loyal.
I know you barely knew her, but before this, would you have ever considered liking her as more than a friend? That should help you decided how to react.
Whatever you do, do it nicely. Her heart is just waiting to be broken. But do make sure you get the point across and you don't ignore it. If you don't like her, she needs to move on with her life.
Good luck :)
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My bf is kind of startng to annoy me. he wont even look at me when i talk to him, im pretty sure he listens but it seems weird that he wont even look at me. and he wont just like stop and talk to me in the hallways, i always hav to start conversation. And today he like ignored me when i ran up to him. hes really not a shy person its just around me. And at first i thought he didnt like me anymore but he said he does. should i just dump him? i still like him but he acts weird sometimes and i HATE how he wont look at me!
Something is most likely bothering him.
Ask him if something is wrong.
Also, has he always been like this? Have their been any major events since you started dating? Look for clues.
You will probably lose interest in him if he continues doing this so try your best to find out what has gone wrong.
Good luck :)
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I've got a bit of a problem with sexual compatibility with my husband. He's into things I really am not into and I'm afraid if I don't try some of these things, he'll find someone else who will. I already found a receipt for condoms, which we don't use, which he purchased on his way to Florida, when was away on a job for 3 weeks. That was proof of what was on his mind and what he was capable of. He's into really kinky things like wanting to dress up in womans clothes with makeup, has fantasies of doing it with a man, and wants me to try a threesome. I never thought of myself as square, but I guess I'm more traditional than I thought. I feel pressure to go along with some of his ideas, which I haven't yet, because I know he'll stray elsewhere. He let it go for a while & our sex life is a once in a blue moon deal, because I know he's bored. Any advice? Do I do what he wants even though I hate it, just to keep him? I do love him and hate to divorce him over this, but trust is a big issue with me too. He knows I'm not into this stuff, but just recently brought all this up again. I don't mind watching a little porno or using toys, but this is just out of my league. What should I do? I don't think compromising will work with him.
hyacinth1121
You need to be honest and serious with him. Remember, your husband is a man who should listen to you and who you should have trust in. Sit down and talk with him, tell him why you are unsure of trying. Tell him you want him to be happy and would do anything for him if needed, but that you are feeling uneasy. Make sure he knows that you are saying this because you love him, not because you feel obligated to.
However, you may want to try making the relationship more exciting. Surprise him with sweet notes or phone calls during the day. Be kind to him and treat him well.
You need to think if this is worth it, however. Can you trust him? Do you trust yourself, your own judgement? Sometimes it takes people years to see they are not completely happy together. On the other hand, every relationship has it's flaws.
If you are going to try the things to make him happy be sure that you still feel okay in yourself. Hurting yourself emotionally in order to make him happy will not work well in the long run. You can't pretend to be happy for you whole life, nor should you need to.
Overall, try talking to him about it. Try working it out. But in the end, remember that neither of you will be happy unless you are treating yourself well.
Good luck.
- Emilyy
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