so i am a sixteen year old incoming senior. I have a good group of close friends and a large group of acquaintances. I get along with basically everyone. I can be shy in certain circustsnces but for the most part I'm outgoing and like being around people. For this summer I'm hostessing at a restaurunt at the beach, three hours away from home. I'm living with my older brother. My boss always compliments me and is in disbelief that I'm only sixteen. A group of friends also live and work here for the summer aswell.
I am pretty normal when it comes to my looks. I'm quite skinny, have naturally straight blonde hair, blue/green eyes. My friends say I have a cute butt, and that it makes up for my lack of breast-age. My skin is pretty good and I dont wear make up, glasses or braces. I'm average in height aswell and my style is preppy skater esque. I probably look like I walked straight out of a pacsun magazine.
So basically I'm cute and fun to be around, yet still mature for my age. Sounds like I have no problem right? Wellllll, I do. When it comes to guys and/or a love life, its non-existent. At home, all of my friends are in relationshops. And whenever I would have a crush on a guy a friend would hang out with him and they would start dating, or he would at least like her and forget about me. Its happened 4 times with my friends from home. Now I'm at a beach with my beach friends. Its kinda the same deal just worse. Its like I'm invisible to the guys here. My four best girlfriends from here hang out withthe lifeguards and the guardshave falling in love with them. I've met themand they kinda just brushed me off.
So I met this boy named andrew because he works at the icecream shop with two of my friends. Hes 17 and also a senior. My friends were all into getting him and I together. So we met and hung out and I got a crush on him. Now he likes one of the girls who was tryin to set me up with him, and she kinda likes him too. So basically I just cant figure out why guys arenot interested in me. My friends are better then me or it seems that way. Also, I always seem to develop crushes on guys, never is it a guy has a crush on me. And with my friends its always boy likes girl, and then girl is like okay! Does that make sense?
so idk, maybe some advice about getting boys to notice and/or like me...maybe thoughts about why they dont...idk. I'd talk about it toy friends but they'd just be like but we love you! And basically it does really suck and hurt and down goes my self esteem...thanks! :/
Btw I'm on my itouch so sorry for any spelling mistakes.
Instead of worrying about why guys may or may not like you, you will be focussed on your life. When you life live for YOURSELF rather than for other people you can really become a great person. You should focus on developing the person you want to be - this happens naturally with time but you can speed up the process if becoming your personal best is of importance to you.
Don`t be afraid to challenge yourself. Wish you were a little more outgoing? Ask a cute stranger (guy) for directions. Just become comfortable approaching people in a less than intimidating situation. From what I`ve heard, guys love it when a girl is brave enough to make the first move. It shows that you are confident enough to approach a guy without worrying about rejection.
You may have the most wonderful, attractive friends in the world, but you`ll never meet your full potential if you are worried about matching up to someone else`s standards. If you live off of your own schedule and follow your dreams guys will see that you are not in a desperate search for a 'man' to fill the void in your life - now that`s attractive!
If you haven`t noticed already the process of becoming likable is about working on yourself. After spending some time to work on yourself you`ll be feeling great. Don`t search for the perfect guy, let him find you. If you demonstrate that you are confident and attractive (not just looks, your personality is what really needs to be attractive) guys will really start to notice you. I suggest that you make a list of everything your ideal 'self' would be and let it guide you.
Don`t worry about becoming 'fake' just because you set goals for who you want to be. Your preferences come from your desires and your desires come from your truest self. What I mean is that if you believe that being outgoing is a good trait then it has come from your true self and you can become it. I say this because people tend to pick up on the slightest 'changes' in others (mostly due to jealousy or fear of being overshadowed) .. in other words, don`t let anyone tell you that you are 'changing' because it is coming from within and its in your best interest.
My final few tips are more specific to attracting guys. Make sure you are always putting effort into your appearance as it shows that you care about yourself - & you never know when you might meet a nice guy! Continue to be friendly, this makes you more approachable, and it always helps if you smile. Don`t be afraid to start a conversation with the guy you are interested in. If you meet a guy you like don`t play hard to get, but don`t always be available either - you should have your own life and goals.
If you do meet a guy or already know one that you`d like to attract, feel free to send me a question that is more specific to the situation & I will try to help you out. Good luck =) [ emilyy's advice column | Ask emilyy A Question ]
xlovexx463 answered Sunday July 27 2008, 11:25 am: In my experiences with guys and such, I've found that if you walk around with a negative attitude about how guys aren't interested in you, that will be projected into the world. What I mean is, if you walk into a situation already thinking you're going to fail, the chances of success aren't very high.
So basically, you've been let down on many occasions. But just because you have doesn't mean you should carry that with you. The next time you meet a guy you want to date, don't worry about him liking you. Just be confident (but not arrogant) and act as though you really don't care whether he likes you or not. If you're stuck worrying, that's portrayed in your attitude as low self-esteem. Trust me on this one, I know it's hard especially when it seems every other time you've failed. But all those other times don't matter. This is now, that was then. See?
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