about

i just recently moved from northwest Indiana to Dayton, Ohio with my boyfriend Brian. We've been together for 3+ years (as of 07/15/01). i am an office manager at a local painting company. I currently drive a new 2004 Black Chevy Malibu LS. I love to go shopping, watching movies, minigolfing, and bowling. some of my favorite music artists are: Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson, Christina Aguilera, Hilary Duff, Justin Timberlake, Ashlee Simpson.

advice

i have been going out with this guy for a little over a month now. i like him alot and from what i hear he likes me a lot too. we have only made out 3 times though. and weve hung out every friday night just about and a few other times at parties and stuff. his only problemis he doesnt show affection. he doesnt do the cute little things like kiss my check, put his hands around my waist, or hold my hand. i am beginning to like other guys that i know would treat me better. i really like him but what should i do?? (oh yeah im a 13 year old girl.)

well it's only been a little over a month. maybe he's still shy about the relationship. if he hasn't had very many girlfriends than that could be why too. i honestly wouldn't bring it up to him right away since it's only been a month and you two are still young. just give it time. maybe you could start kissing his cheek or begin to hold his hand. if you start to do that he may realize that you want that affection and he might start doing it on his own in the future.

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Say you like a girl and you know she likes you. You've hooked up once or twice and promised to call her so that you can arrange a proper date. How soon should you call/meet/talk to to arrange this date?

well most people say wait a day or two. but honestly if you both really like each other i'd say call her the next day. but you could make the date a few days later. it doesn't hurt to call. good luck !

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I've had this crush on this girl for quite some time. It's gotten to the point where I'll buy stuff I don't really need, nor do I really want, just to talk to her. She always seems happy to see me and always gives me a big hug before I leave. The problem is I have no idea how old she is. I'm not the type of guy who judges people who date younger or older people, but it seems to worry my when I'm involved. I'm 20, what if she's only 15 or 16. She looks and kind of acts young, so I'm worried. What do you think the dating age limit should be for someone like myself?

The other problem. Earlier today, I saw scars and cuts on her rist. It doesn't look like something an accident would have caused. I know she can't really die from cuts on arm, but the scars aren't exactly good for her either. How should I go about asking her where they're from? Is it even my business to ask such a question? What if she obviously lies to me about the scars origins? Should I just drop it then or what?

Well i was 17 when i met my boyfriend who was 20 (he was going on 21).. It's a little age difference. But not too bad. I would say 16 should be the minimum. I mean honestly the age different between you and the girl isn't THAT bad it's just she's just at a younger age right now where her parents may not agree. Not if she was 20 and you were 25 that would be fine. But try to find out her age and stuff. Now as for the cutting goes. You can get hurt from cutting yourself. If you cut a vein (on your wrist) the wrong way you could bleed to death. I don't know how well you know her but i wouldn't think it would be very comfortable asking her about it if you don't know her well. I would drop it for now, if you two end up getting closer and you still notice cuts on her wrist then you could bring it up.

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Okay, this is kinda compicated. So theres this guy i like. hes a year younger than me, hes 16 im 17, but i couldnt care less about that. last year, at homecoming, two of our mutual friends decided that he and i should go out. so they convinced him to ask me to homecoming. he really liked me. but i was still in the process of getting over this really complicated relationship/non-relationship which it has taken me until a few months ago to get over. i did have some feelings for this guy (the first guy) but i wasnt ready and i felt cornered cuz our two mutual friends were pushing for this so when he asked me,... i reacted pretty badly. as in not good. rejected him. not gently.now, hes hung up on these two different girls, one is an exchange student from new zealand. shes really nice, but ive talked to her about her and him, and she says itll never happen. the other girl is not allowed to date. so there's no problem except that he likes them. sometimes i get signals from him that make me think he likes me, and then hell make a comment about one of the other girls and im really not so sure. but i really like him. but im going to college in less than a year and we wont be in the same school or even the same city. well be in the same state though. im so confused. please help.

well not to hurt your feelings but he might have gotten over you. i had a male friend that was in love with one of my female friends. i say he liked her for well over a year. he wanted to be more than friends with her. she kept saying she only liked him a friend. well he ended up moving on and found a girlfriend. him and his girlfriend broke up and then my female friend decided she liked him more as a friend. but he still liked his ex girlfriend. he was over my female friend. and to this day their still not together. sometimes it's like the saying 'you snooze you lose.' you can try to be more than friends but it doesn't seem like he's too interested anymore. and you will also be leaving for college in a year. so is it really worth it ?

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i posted a question a couple weeks ago... and thanx to everybody that answered it... ok so here's another one for ya'll... so my last question was about me kissing another guy and do u think my boyfriend would break up with me... and how do i talk to him about it... well we talked and we are still together (yay!) so ne way... another boy problem question.... about ben... ok, i really really really like ben and he is the first boyfriend that i have had that i really truly like... but for some reason i cant get this paranoid idea outta my head that he is going to dump me... i think it's because this is my first real boyfriend and i am worried im gonna mess it up but i dont kno... this is really unusual for me because i am really a live by the moment-dont over think it kinda person... so i guess the question is... how can i stop worrying? i dont kno y this happening tho... he is really sweet to me and always says happy 1 week annaversary! and just stupid cutsie stuff like that... he treats my really well... and i mean... he told me i was the first girlfriend he really truly liked since his first.... i really dont want to get hurt... so i guess if u understand this at all... please help... lol...
...claire

well i always think my boyfriend is going to leave me or not want me anymore. or possibly cheat on me.. i always think it but in reality i know it won't happen. i just always think of what could happen (whether it's negative or not). the only thing i can say is try to think positive when you think of the negative. try to think i know he won't dump me. he likes me too much. or he does this nice thing for me,, whyyy would he dump me?

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Agh... I'm so agitated and confused and depressed at the same time I can barely type this...! Anyways... my gf and I have been going out for about 10 days. My friends and I and her hang out all the time. Well it started last night. My friend was just joking around and he said "I'm like a star in the sky!" (Yeah we're pretty weird sometimes.) And my gf said "If you are then I will love you haha" and this kind of got me down, even though she said she was just kidding. Also, the same day, my friend was just like "My butt hurts." Then she says "Haha let me check that out for you then", and she touched it lightly... In a joking way, but it still didn't feel right.Another thing is, today, when my friend and I were walking towards her, she was like "Hey (friends name)!" And I was thinking to myself... "Eh? :( She didn't even say hi to me..." But... my gf said that she is crazy about me and she really loves me and everything like that, and she said that like the 7th night we were going out... but on msn. =\ Anyways, my question is, does she still like me? Or could she be liking my friend, and not me? I mean, she says she's worried that I will like another girl and dump her in the near future, and she also says that she's afraid to get hurt again, so maybe she will hurt me, and everything will be fine for her? I don't know, but we still held hands and hugged and all the normal stuff we do like that, but it still made me sad... please help... and thanks for reading...

well it looks to me as though she is just joking around with your friend. you've only been together for 10 days. so it doesn't seem too serious. so i wouldn't jump the gun and think she has the hots for your friend. try not to worry about it. it was kind of rude of her to say hi to your friend and not you. so that seems a little fishy. but i have no idea why she wouldn't say hi. yes most guys make the first moves.

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This guy kissed me on the cheek and on the hand. and is always snuggling up to me and stuff. But he's a year younger. Do u think he likes me or what?

sure sounds like he likes you and i honestly don't think age matters. so if you like him. go for it. sounds like a nice guy.

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Ok.. this guy... i like him so much, hes the reason i wanna get up for school everyday. I want to show him i like him, but im not sure he likes me. He did at the begining of the year but then he said he stopped. I dont wanna ruin our friendship over this, but i dont know if it could turn into something better by somehow showing him i like him a bunch. He always looks at me in class and smiles FORever and we flirt alot but what guy dosnt do that? what do you think?

well it doesn't sound like you two hang out. you have to hang out to get the guy to know you outside of school. people are more open and fun outside of school. if he liked you at one time then he'll see the real you. he might start liking you again. i'm not saying your fake in school. but people don't act the same in school. you have work to do. can't always talk in class. can't do certain things or you could get in trouble.

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my boy friend is always calling my bf a bitch..shes like awsome though and i tell him not to call her that infront of me..but he still does..what do i do?

ha .. i have the same exact problem. if your boyfriend is anything like mine then he's stubborn and is going to do what he pleases. my boyfriend cannot stand my best friend and he says the meanest things but in front of her he's sweet as pie. unfortunately all you can do is talk to him about it. tell him how you feel. let him know she's your best friend she's going to be in your life and he needs to respect that and get over his immature reasons as to why he does not like her. i don't necessarily think it's anything to break up with your boyfriend about. especially if you and your boyfriend have been together awhile. hopefully he'll just be understanding and cool it off a bit.

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okey dokey, my ex bf's friend asked me out n he never even met me. i said i had to meet him first and we would have to become friends before we went out. all my friends think that if i go out with him he is gonna rape me just cuz he's 15 (i'm 13) n he had sex b4. i will probably go out with him but i already let him know i dont drink smoke do drugs or have sex. he's okay w/ that but he talks about all this sexual stuff online to me. i wanna go out with him but how do i tell my friends he's not a bad person and how do i tell him that i dont really wanna talk about sexual stuff? thx, *PrEssUrEd*-p.s-i did some sexual stuff b4 just i didnt have sex and all my friends tell me to do sexual stuff

well first of all don't do anything you want to do. and he can't rape you if you say no. stick up for yourself. you said he's okay with you not wanting to drink, smoke, do drugs, or have sex. so then there shouldn't be a problem. have fun and meet new people. get to know him like you wanted to in the first place before you take it any farther.

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Ok... one of my best friends just left from SC and moved to FL. I miss hime soo much. His parents kicked him out of the house and I loved him but while he was here I was afraid to tell him and now that he is gone I wish I had. He always said he had something for me but everytime we wanted to do something I had a boyfriend. Should I call him and tell him how I feel?

i wouldn't.. he's gone. there's not much you can do. i don't believe long distant relationships work very well. so i think it would be kind of pointless.

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mi bf dosnt live in the same state as me but the thing is i know him so its not some guy that i met on the internet he use to live here and he went out with one of my friends but now that he lives in a diff state i keep thinking hes cheating on me. there is this other guy that lives here and we like each other and today i got really stressed and he told me i was cute because i didnt know how to do something and he started to blush i talk to him on the phone all the time but i dont talk to my bf on the phone i dont know if i should break up with my bf or not and go out with the one guy thats close by?

shood i

im realli confused

well long distance relationships aren't easy. it takes a lot of trust and support. since you feel your boyfriend might be cheating on you it's probably not best you stick with him. It obviously seems like your relationship isn't working out for the best. I think it'd be best to break up with him, move on, and possibly check out the new guy your possibly interested in.

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i guess this might be a stupid question, but something kind of depresses me. my boyfriend asked me last night would it be okay if he spent new years with his guys this year. he said that him and i spent the last 2 new years together and he wants to hang with his friends. ofcourse i said yeah, because im not the controling type. well, even though i said yes, it makes me a little sad knowing that he doesnt want to spend it with me. its like, why cant i chill with his friends too? its not like i never had. do any of you guys think i should tell him how i feel? or do any of you think that im wrong for feeling the way i feel?

thanks for your time.
18/f

i've felt the exact same way you have. when i first met my boyfriend it was me and him 24/7. he never even talked to his friends. than a year or two into our relationship he started hanging out with his friends and talking to them. that is perfectly fine. but he would never include me with his friends. it's not wrong to feel that way. i would let him know how you feel. ask him why you weren't included to hang out with his friends for new years. maybe it's an all guy thing. who knows ! but you need to find out why. maybe you two could do something new years day to make up for it.

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17-F I've hung out with this boy Chris twice this week and we like each other but whenever he trys to kiss me I pull away. I have kissed him but I dunno I don't have any desire to do it again. This past summer I was used by this other kid. Since then I haven't wanted to do anything with anyone. What do you think is the reason I don't feel comfortable with Chris?? I do really like him and I think he's getting frustrated with it.

well it's obvious your not comfortable kissing him. it could be because of the previous guy using you. or maybe you just aren't comfortable kissing him yet. i don't know how long you have known chris but you only mentioned hanging out twice this week.. so it seems like you might be uncomfortable at how soon you two are kissing. you don't want to get hurt. so i would find out if you two are official before you go any further. maybe you will feel more comfortable.

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I have had a boyfriend for 2 years on and off, 6 months straight and im starting to like a different guy, we hung out last night and he had his arm around me and stuff and i feel so bad that i did that but now i like both what should i do my boyfriend is the good guy doesnt drink or smoke but the other guy smokes weed and stuff, and my boyfriend is really mad at me right now he says i am a bitch to him but he has no idea about the other guy and the worst thing is they were once best friends, if me and my boyfriend are really broken up should i go 4 the other guy, or not because then he will never get back with me :'( so confused pealse help

well first i would figure out what you like about each guy. and what you dislike about each guy. whatever suits you best you should go for. but it seems like you and your current boyfriend don't have a steady relationship. i don't know what your reasons for breaking up off and on for 2 years. but it doesn't seem like it's working out too well. maybe a new guy in the picture would be a good idea. but you don't need to hurt your current boyfriends feelings. don't tell him about the other guy right away. just let him know things aren't working out. maybe this new guy won't even work out. just take things slow and figure out what you want first.

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my girlfriend and i are sort of drifting apart... so its getting harder to like her when i dont see her too much... but my best friend and i have been hanging out a lot and im starting to like her... but i cant break my girlfriends heart but i dont want to be dishonest with her????

You will definately hurt her feelings if you break up with her for your best friend. Especially if your girlfriend has strong feelings for you. You need to weight the pros and cons. Are you and your best friend better as friends? Or could you see a romantic future with this best friend? What happens if you and your best friend break up? Do you think you could remain friends? If not than you are losing a best friend as well as your (current) girlfriend. So you need to figure out what you think will work and what you want. Maybe you and your girlfriend need to try harder to see each other. Any free time you get, you go visit her, or she comes to visit you. Maybe find an activity you two both like and start doing it more.

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