ask Tootsie

Hello, advicenators users!! My name is Kylie and I'm sixteen years of age.

I love:
music, books, cooking, baking, soap operas (lame, I know), emo boys, docudramas, etc.

I hate:
reality tv, people who are actually dumb, etc.

I'm a smart ass and I know it. I love to try anything once and more if I like it.

If you need to know anything else, I'll let you know.

Ask me anything if you dare.

E-mail: tootsie.000@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: the country under Canada
Occupation: invisible unicorn trainer
Age: 16
MSN: tootsie.000@hotmail.com
Member Since: May 21, 2007
Answers: 60
Last Update: October 6, 2007
Visitors: 4970

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My friend I’ve known my whole life I guess we were like best friends. We always told each other it but never did anything out of school except email aim and talk. Then we liked each other a little a lot. Everyone tried to get us together as in dating or alone together. Then there were a lot of mishaps at parties. Many good time so many bad times. Old games like truth or dare and zap. Our relationship fell apart. Im friends with a lot of guys and most are older than him. I am always with them. I don’t like any of them but him and another guy. I’ve never dated because I always fell for my friends and I never wanted to loose them. Four guys like me that I know of right now but I cant do it I’d miss him to much. They know I won’t date because of all that’s happened. My friend says he’s afraid on what id think, my friend told me. Doesn’t seem to like the guys I talk to anymore. We always talked, now almost never except at school a little. We always had silly little arguments on kinds of donuts and stuff always talking. He always gave me high fives or would do anything to hold my hand even for a second and then every time we saw each other he’d give me a high five or we arm wrestle or play games like red hands but he never wanted to hurt me. We used to really care for each other now we do a little but it’s falling apart. He talks to my friends more than me now. But I just don’t know what to do anymore. Im even to nervous to talk to him I’ve never been nervous for any guy. I don’t know what to do??? 13 about 14 femalee _(link)

by the way you talk, you kind of sound like a lesbian that wants to seem straight.

I'm 20 years old, and a girl.

My boyfriend proposed to me a month ago, and I couldn't be happier!

We're both students. I've got three years (including this one) left, and he has 4 years to go. We're not planning to get married until at least after I'm done school, so I've got tons of time.

I'm sort of panicking, though, because I'm not exactly the wedding type. I've always had male friends, I spend more time doing my physics homework than dreaming up my perfect wedding, and I've never actually been to one before, due to my absolute lack of family.

It's weird; I'm really looking forward to marrying this guy, but dreading the prospect of having to plan it! That's why I want to start looking around, even though I have several years to sort things out.

Is there anyone out there who has planned (or is planning) a low-budget wedding and has any tips, great websites or books for me to check out? I have absolutely no idea what happens at a wedding, so I have to start from square one.

Before anyone asks me to Google it, I have, and in the process have been overwhelmed by the flood of details. I kind of need a step by step thing. _(link)

if you're on a low budget, have a small wedding with just your closest friends/family. Instead of booking a church, try having the ceremony in a park or a family's/friend's backyard. That way you can have the reception there too. you can hire a caterer, but if you're just going to have about twenty to thirty people, you dont really need one. you can cook them the night before and then have someone heat them up before the reception.

hey im a girl
i just wnana kno
why guys do this

1:they like ignore you for a day and then the next they start talkin to you

2:they are so confusin sometiems uthink they like you beccacuse of thyre smile or something
and you neverrealy now
why do they give mixed signals??

Haha
thats all really
:P thanks
PEACE _(link)

they want to test the waters. i.e. as in see how you react towards them in both cases to be able to tell if you like them back.

So I've been dating my current boyfriend for about a month now. He says he loves me but we don't actually talk much, and I'm beginning to think it's more of a sexual relationship than anything else. I'm also getting really bored, and he lies to me a lot. Along with this, he cheated on me, but sticks to the stroy of it not being intentional.
I was with one of his good friends a while back. It ended pretty badly but we've both changed a lot. He says he has feelings for me, but I know he isn't over his ex. Maybe i like him back.

And so I'm really confused about what I should do. Things seem like they're going ok with guy #1 but it also seems like that's just a facade. Guy #2 is just trouble. And I kinda miss being on my own. I don't want to hurt 1 but I'm positive it's going to happen eventually at the rate things are going. _(link)

dump the lying cheater. he's not worth any girl's affections.

my ex and i may be getting back. but first he wants me to prove to him i can be loyal. the only reason he worries is because he used to cheat and worries i want to get back. plus we broke up cuz i had feelings for someone else. we still love eachother, but he doesn't want to get back together because he is worried i won't be loyal. how can i prove to him he is the only one for me, and not have to wait forever. also, my bf may be going to jail for awhile, and it will be hard to prove it. _(link)

he doesn't want you to prove youll be loyal, he wants to 'sow his wild oats'. once a cheat, always a cheat. hell cheat on you again. he doesnt love you.

I'm 15/f, he's 15/m.

So I like this guy in my grade. Last year I also liked him, and he ended up asking me out. However, I turned him down because I no longer liked him. Yes, complicated. I know.

But this year, I like him again. He recently got over a girl that he never even dated. But he's been sending me mixed signals. He stares at me in school, but never says hi, almost as if he's too shy or something. But he waved to me from his homecoming car ( he was king ). We talk on AIM sometimes, and things go well, and then he signs off randomly and just says he's leaving. I already subtly told him I like him, he didn't say anything. I just DON'T KNOW what to do. He was supposed to dance with me at homecoming also, we discussed it, but he never approached me. We danced together last year. =(

I just don't get it.
Should I just give up and move on,
Or wait and stay strong?

Sincerely,
Crushed. _(link)

hes sending mixed signals to see how you respond. He doesn't know if you actually like him or are going to blow him off because you couldn't make up your mind last year.

i like a girl, and i think she likes me but i don't know exactly how to land it and start dating

help! _(link)

if she definitely likes you and you know it, ask her out and get to know her before you decide if youre going to work out as a couple.

well recently this guy asked me out [in front of a bunch of people from school.] i said yes cuz i didn't want to hurt his feelings again... [ he asked me out on friday but i said no.. :/]
and now i really regret saying yes because i REALLY like this other guy who goes to a different school. And i don't wanna hurt him but i'm not sure what to do. i want to be friends with him really bad but right now i just want to be with one person...
help. please. _(link)

just tell him you dont like him like that. be honest.

Okay, well....I started going out with this guy named Dustin last Friday. Just today, I decided I didn't like him. And I felt like a jerk, because I like a bunch of other guys (im a flirt lol). So I decided to break up with him. I didn't think it was fair to me that I was going out with someone I didn't like, and I didn't think it was fair to him that I liked other guys. So I dumped him. So I like this other really hott kid named Derik. I told some people, because I figure he'll go out with me. Well, Dustin is convinced I'm going to go back out with him. But he's going to hear that I like Derik. I honestly don't know what to do. :( _(link)

you end up not liking the guys you date because you only start dating them because you think theyre hot so you dont know what theyre personality is like.

Hey I am trying to become the ultimate player, boyfriend, whatever you wanna call it. I could use some advice and please spare no details. The more info you give the better. Try to cover all the bases like clothes, personality, and anything else you can think of. Thanks. _(link)

im not sure why you would want to become a player, because fye, girls hate that. all girls have different types no matter what 'group' they're in. a preppy chick, a goth girl, and a nerdy girl could all end up liking the same guy.

hi..lets call me jane...okay so im like obsessively in like with my best guy friend, lets call him chad. okay so my best girl friend lets call her...well her names sam. okay so i told sam that i told chad i liked him and she was like OMG RLY? YAY so then she messaged chad on myspace and was like "omg jane told you she liked you!?!?!?" but hes not on right now..the thing is I NEVER REALLY TOLD CHAD! what do i do?! do i lie and make up a story saying that i was joking or do i actually tell him? thing is-- im POSITIVE he doesnt like me. _(link)

get over it and tell him.

so what if he doesn't like you? its not a big deal to let someone know that you like them even if they dont like you back. you can make a joke out oof it.

I hardly ever ask questions about love life. But I really need advice. I would talk to my best friends about this matter, but one of them will just tell me to go for it without listening to how i feel about it, and the other will just tell me NO because of the guy. I'll tell you everything that happened up until now, and i won't leave anything else out so i get get a truthful-straight foward answer from you guys.
Just for a warning, this is probably gonna be long.
I'll take you back to a few months ago. lets say..may. Well, back then I was currently with my first boyfriend (lets call him Joe) and things weren't going very well. I was doing things I really didn't want to do because I felt like I was trying to compete with his ex. Even though he didn't have contact with her. Well, Joe met my mom one weekend, and she let us go down in the basement to watch a movie. Lets just say she walked in on something that she wasn't supposed to walk in on.. After that, me and him had a serious talk and were going to try to change our relationship around, and if it didnt' work out, we would end it.
It went good for a week, then around memorial day, joe, danny (his best friend), and hannah (my best friend) went to hannahs house for her family cookout. [[ Danny and Hannah are going out btw ]] Everything was going good, but then Danny and Joe went for a walk and were talking for a while. I wondered what they were talking about to Hannah, and Hannah said Joe was going to break up with me. I thought she was saying it as some mean joke, like she has been for the past week. So I just pretended to be mad and shurgged it off. Well, Joe and Danny came back and we all talked.I thought that everything was going good, and I guess it was.
Then the next day, I went to hang out with Frank (my other best friend). Frank told me that Jimmy (his best friend, and one of mine) told him that Hannah was saying that Joe was gonna break up with me and such. So Frank talked to Joe about what was going on. Apparently, Hannah knew everything going on before I did, but wasn't going to tell me because Danny made her swear not to tell. Which kind of pissed me off. But anyway, Frank got the inside scoop on why Joe wanted to break up and such. Looking back on it I guess I knew what everyone was talking about, I was just in shock.
So later that night, I called Hannah to see if she would have the guts to tell me herself. I asked her what was wrong and she told me to talk to Joe about it. I told her that I knew and pretended not to be mad at her. So, I ended up calling Joe later and flipped out on him about telling every single person in the school. He told me that he didn't think of me as the same person. We ended up deciding it wouldn't work out so we broke up "mutually". I didn't really care until the next morning when I was an emotional wreck the whole day. I was talking to my good friend Jade about it, and Jade told me that she heard from her friend Amy that Danny said that Joe told him that he wished he asked Amy out sooner instead of me when we started having problems.
Well, I was even more of an emotional fjewirjfl after that and tried to figure out what the heck was going on from Joe. Joe told me that Danny lied. But Danny told me that Joe lied. I ended up getting mad at Amy. And then Jade hated me for telling Joe what I heard. So that went on for a good couple of weeks. I still liked him for about a month after we broke up, and I told Joe how I felt, he told me he doesn't like me anymore and ended up getting into huge "sob" stories on how his other girl friends broke up with him. So I don't really talk to him about it anymore.
Me and Hannah aren't that good of friends anymore because she's all hypocritical about Danny. and honestly i hate Danny with a passion so I just don't bother getting into huge discussions like this with her.
The problem is, its been three months and I'm still afraid to let go of Joe completly. I havn't really accepted the fact that he won't come back. I faced it, I gave back the stupid stuff he gave me. But I still have this feeling in my gut that he still likes me? Or maybe I just want him to like me back.. I can hear people getting sick of me with dwelling on this for so long. I'm sick of it myself. I want to move on. and whats even worse is that Jimmy likes me. I want to like Jimmy so bad, but I wouldn't go out with him because of the fact of Joe. And I don't beleive in using people.
Part of me wants to Call Joe. Just to set things straight. Should I? What should I do? I'm really lost right now.

sorry for the confusion. I just don't know if I should set things straight again with Joe (relationship or no-relationship) or give Jimmy a chance.

_(link)

Cut joe out of your life, hes just playing you. on the other hand, so what if jimmy and joe are friends? if you like the guy, go for it. joe said he doesnt like you anymore, so if he was telling the truth about that, he wont care if you date one of his friends.

I've liked this kid Jerry for about 4 and a half months now. When I first met him he was going out with someone named Della, but he broke up with her. Now, he goes out with my not-very-close friend Jessica.

Well, I can't describe how much I like this kid. It feels like love but I know it's not because love takes two people, and I'm only 13. He knows I like him, and last I heard he does like me, but I don't know if he still does. He said he liked me when him and Della were going out, according to a friend. It feels like love though, and I feel like crap, especially since i like him at such a high degree. I've never liked anyone as much as him. I feel like throwing up when i see him and when he walks into class i start to shake and blush. . i don't know what i'm going to do about the sumemr. everytime i even think about liking someone else i feel like i'm cheating on him, even though i'm not. i feel like tied down by him, and i like it. i'd give all the money i had to be his girlfriend, or do anything i could. i've been feeling so incomplete lately because I can't and won't ever have him.

I don't know what to do.
I've been feeling so bad lately.
I don't know how to stop it.

Please help.
_(link)

What you seem to be talking about is unrequited love.

This is, in fact, love. One person CAN be in love with another without the other loving them back.

You should tell him how you feel. I know he has a girlfriend, but you should still give it a shot. If people are meant to be together, they'll make it work no matter what interferes between them.

Jerry and Jessica may not stay together and you and Jerry may be meant for each other.

I hope this helps you. I don't know how to make you stop feeling a certain way about a person.

So, I guess i didnt' really answer your question but i wanted to say something.

16/f

i have found out reacently that i like girls.. but i dont really know ho to come out.. and when i do how do i get a grilfriend.. ? _(link)

Practice first.

the first person you tell should be the person you trust the most.

make sure to tell them that its not their fault and you didn't choose to be this way.

as for the girlfriend thing, im not sure about that one.

ok so ive liked this kid for a really long time now, and they used to like me, i found out about a week ago that they dont like me anymore but i still have really big feelings for them they know that though and we are still bestfriends, things between us have been getting closer and we talk and hangout alot more but something is definetly missing. now i got a boyfriend about 4 days ago and i like him and he makes me feel speacial but thiers something about him that bugs me and i dont know what it is, he likes me alot says the sweetest stuff to me and on top of it all lets me know im on the top of his list, but i dont know if hes what i want because what i want i will neevr get witch is my friend???? any ideas please help i need it _(link)

if you even have the slightest doubt about your boyfriend then you shouldn't be with him.

dump him and move on

so i like this guy and i am pretty sure he like me blahblahblah the problem is now he knows i like him and its kind of awkward to be around him any ideas how to not make is so weird????? _(link)

if you like him and he likes you, then it shouldn't be weird. if it is weird, it's because he doesn't like you.

What's the difference between a 'friend hug' and a 'more than friend hug?' Is there any way to tell the two apart? I have an inkling but just tell me what you think, it'd help my situation a lot! _(link)

a friend hug is basically where they just wrap their arms around you and kinda squeeze, and a more than friends hug is where they do the friend hug, but kind of press their body into you.

there is this guy that i met this year. we started talking on instant messenger about a month ago. and he told me he liked me.

well that was fine. except, now he's getting really obsessive? annoying? stalkerish? he is just bothering me. and i feel bad that he likes me, but i just don't really want to talk to him anymore.

well, lately i've been sort of ignoring him, like i don't go on that instant messenger much anymore and try to avoid his eye contact as much as possible (same with talking.)

well he sent me an email about a half hour ago asking if i would like to go to the 8th grade dance with him. i am not sexually interested in this guy at ALL and i REALLY do not want to go with him.

the weird thing is, he KNEW i liked someone else before he even told me he liked me! why would anyone on earth tell their crush that they like them when they KNOW that, not only do they not like them, but they like someone else?!

anyway, do you think i should ignore the e-mail? or should i say "no" ? there are backfires to both. if i ignore the email, he will never know why i didn't respond. and if i say "no" he will be heartbroken.

in addition, he also even said once that i wouldn't go with him because i like someone else... i guess he was asking to make sure?

i really need help. _(link)

I know you don't want to hurt him by saying you don't want to go with him, but you have to. If you go to the dance with him even though you don't want to, you're going to have a bad time and because you're having a bad time, so will he. You'll both be better off going with someone who actually wants to be with you and you want to be with.

Today, the classroom slut found out that i like this guy and now she is all over him. What do u think i should do? _(link)

You should smack that bitch down. She needs to find herself a man whore.

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