About ammo
"Though its been a while now
I can still feel so much pain
Like a knife that cuts you the wound heals
But the scar, that scar remains..." -Poison, Every Rose Has It's Thorn.
My name's Ammo and I'm here to give any help or advice on anything that I can. :] Firstly, if you were kind enough to come here and read up on me, I thank you.
I've been through a lot when it comes to relationships and life in general. I've seen and heard many things and have always felt it's nice to be able to share my experiences (both good and bad ones) with as many people as I can in the hopes that I can help others not make the mistakes I've made (and sometimes still make). Who knows, maybe there's a lesson or two I can learn from you as well.
I don't really use chat programs much anymore so e-mail would be the best way to get in touch if you wish to chat but if you really need to chat then I am able to do so via Facebook, Yahoo or MSN. I'm a very social person so don't mind anyone wanting to chat. ^_^
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Website: Magic Ammo
E-mail: amritbhachoo@gmail.com
Gender: Male
Location: UK
Occupation: Student & Superhero
Yahoo: brutal.desire
Member Since: March 25, 2007
Answers: 950
Last Update: July 28, 2022
Visitors: 77383
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I'm really struggling through healing from a break that I had at the beginning of the year. He asked me to marry him and I said yes so technically we were engaged? We never talked about why he just packed up and left because he avoided me. We did start talking again but I was afraid to bring up things because I didnt want to make things stressful . I ended up confronting him and he basically said he left because I lashed out at him for no reason, and I kept putting him out. I am not the type to lash out or argue unless someone hurts my feelings or upsets me. A lot of the times he would minimize my feelings or shut down when I wanted to deal with our issues. I never put him out, i only told him to him to leave if he can't talk to me or act like he wants to be at home. He said he did nothing wrong in the relationship that it was all me. Because he blames me, I have started to feel really guilty and questioning myself because I know there were times I did get upset but I remember having reasons. I did everything I could to be a good girlfriend to him and make him happy. I pretty much have accepted full responsibility for single handed ruining a relationship I really wanted to work out. I feel really bad because I hurt him, but I've apologized so many times for it. I'm just having a hard time forgiving myself. How do you move on without being able to fix it?
Stop-blaming-yourself.
A relationship is a partnership and it works both ways. Lets say, just for the sake of argument that he is right and it was your fault... did he try sit down and talk to you about things and try fix things? For the longest time, when one my ex's had broken up with me (she was my first gf so as you can imagine it wasa rough thing to deal with) I kept blaming myself until I sat down and asked myself that same question I just asked you. My answer was, no - she didn't.
Stop blaming yourself because clearly your ex seems quite happy to just blame the entire thing on your and not take any responsibility whatsoever. Truth of the matter here seems to be that you tried to do the right thing by talking and trying to fix things but if he was unwilling to meet you half way to also do this then the real fault here is his own. Maybe he just can't see that or just doesn't want to accept that and so is finding it easier to blame you but the way I see it, this wasn't your fault nor was it something you should be apologizing for.
Any break up is hard and no matter what I say it will not make it easier to deal with. All I can really say is he had his chance to fix things by talking to you and he chose to walk away instead. More importantly, he seems to have gone running straight to his ex and is engaged to her as well - that all just sounds like a disaster in the making so it wouldn't surprise me if eventually he comes crawling back to you saying he will take you back if .
Give yourself time, it is what will help and its different for everyone on how long that will be but it will happen eventually. But stop blaming yourself for the break down of your relationship because it wasn't your fault. You tried to fix things, he was the one who instead of facing things and also trying decided to run away from it instead.
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(Rating: 5)
Thanks for your feedback, I keep reading it over and over
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