about

I'm a mother of 2 boys who are 13 months apart. Talk about a handful. I'm a wife to the best husband I could have ever dreamed of.
I'm one of the very blessed.


I have Bipolar 1 Disorder. I hate taking all these medications and always going to doctors appointments, but life is too short to let mental illness get the better of me.


Often times life is a challenge, and nobody knows that better than me. I wake up wondering if this is going to be a day my illness overpowers my meds, and either sends me flying like a bat out of hell, or leaves me laying on the couch like a wet dish rag.


Thank all that is good in the world that I have an excellent support system at home.
I'm one of the lucky ones.


I'm honest, and that can either be a perk or s flaw. Depends on how you choose to look at it.
I like to see it as a perk, because it's better to hear the truth than to be told candy coated bullshit.






advice

So my mother has been struggling with depression ever since I could remember. I've always been pretty sympathetic about it because I have struggled with depression at one point in my life, but thankfully I have over came it. I always ask my mother why she is sad and she never has a straight answer. I can only imagine why she is unhappy. She works at a waitress at a crappy job, she has absolutely no money, tons of debt, and she is currently the head of her pitty party. She has never really had a charmed life, but she always provided for me and my sister. I am 20 years old and my sister is 21 and we are trying to start our lives and move out. My mother is not too happy about it. She wants us to help her pay for bills and when working a minimum wage job 30 hours or less a week, there isn't a lot of money to give and not a lot of money to keep for myself. I really want to move out but my mom makes me feel terrible for leaving her. She is 57 years old and expects me to take care of her. She tells me that she has taken care of me my whole life and now it is time for me to take care of her. Mind you, I have two older sisters in their late 30s who are more than financially stable and are not willing to help her. I am only 20 years old! I should not be the one who has to support her. I love my mother more than anything in the world and that is why it is going to be hard for me to leave her. I give her all of my money and do everything I can to make her happy. My 21 year old sister doesn't care to help pay the bills but she thinks she can live in our house and not do a thing. She is moving out and my mom doesn't care because she knows she has me still. I don't want her to depend on me and I need some help. My sisters refuse to help us and I just need to get out of this situation. Should I leave and get on with my life or should I stay and struggle to make ends meat to try to make my mother happy? I just don't know what to do. If i left and something happened to her, I would feel terrible but staying home is holding me back and bringing me back into my depression. I don't want her to be unhappy, but i also do not want to be unhappy. What should i do?

Don't take this the wrong way, but your mother is full of shit. Her responsibility to you is to see that you become a productive member of society.
You need to move out and make a life for yourself. PERIOD. It is unhealthy for you to stay there and take care of her.

Stop paying her bills. Stop taking care of her. She is a grown woman and can take care of herself, depressed or not. If something happens to her, it would be her own fault. It would suck, and you'd feel bad, but it would be in no way your fault, nor your responsibility.

Good grief, did her parents live with her from age 20 and demand she care for them? No! She went out, made her own life, had her own family!
You are entitled that same right.
You live your life for you, not her.

[view]

(Rating: 4) I felt the same way, but she is mother and that's why I even contemplated staying. Thank you for the advice
<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker