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Due to assholes on the site and people who have no idea what the hell they are talking about I have left the site. Ahem, Dangernerd...Who likes to make assumptions about people when they do not know them ;) Then has brass balls to go search up whatever information he can gather so he has back fire to use whenever he feels like starting a little hissy fit. Let me remind those who read this, Dangernerd has a nasty tendency of using what you post on the site against you if you where to ever have a problem with someone on the site. Mind you, He likes to gather false information in a way that he thinks will benefit him in the long run. This site is run by someone who doesn't have class, Who likes to pigeon hole people. The same guy who supposedly is running an "ADVICE" column but somehow has pre-teens asking about sex and how to do sexual things to their "partners" this site is also filled with people giving advice that is NOT helpful or use full in any form rather than most encouraging the young ones. Well lets get to the bottom of it, This site is a laughing matter. Dangernerd is a joke and couldn't be a bigger clown ;)
advice
18/f
I broke up with my boyfriend of 8 months during the first weekend of October. A lot of things were just building up. I went to college four hours away and he didn't go to college at all. I'm in a major that requires a lot of time in a studio. Sometimes I don't get back to my room until 2 or 3 in the morning, sometimes I don't go back at all and he didn't really understand how dedicated I was to it then whenever I would get home I would call him and he'd still be with his friends..at 3 in the morning. And I'm not saying it was just on weekends or a few days a week. It was everyday! I loved him dearly, more than anyone before and he was the one I lost my virginity to. But our relationship basically existed through texting and then whenever one of us could visit all we'd do was have sex. Well I started to fall out of love with him and didn't think it was fair to drag him along in a relationship if the feelings weren't equal. So I said "I love you but not enough for this to work" and he took that as me not loving him at all. It was a nasty break up and he was angry for a while and I got a lot of hateful texts from him and the drunken phone calls and he used to make me feel like shit for hurting him and all I kept doing was apologizing until one night he really pissed me off and I told him I was over it and I yelled at him a lot for being such an ass. In the 8 months that we dated he NEVER saw the angry side of me towards anyone so when he got me angry it sort of slapped him in the face and he woke up and apologized. The other night he texted me just to say hey and I'm not the type of person who can just ignore him. Well he kept bringing up random topics to keep the conversation going and even admitted that he was just trying to make conversation with me. I'll see him over thanksgiving break to pick up all of my stuff from his house and it'll be the first time I've seen him since we broke up. I know a part of me still loves him. And I think a part, or all of him still loves me, he's never kept in contact with any other ex before. I never felt like breaking up was 100% the best decision but I just figured our time was up. Now that I'll be seeing him I don't know what's going to happen. I don't know if I'll be able to resist kissing him and I really don't know if I want to get back together or not but I don't want to give him false hope. Another rather huge part of the story. We had unprotected sex a few days before we broke up and I'm about 90% sure I had a miscarriage a few weeks ago, and I talked to his sister(who's had a miscarriage) and she said it sounded like I did. He doesn't know about it though.
So two questions.
Should I talk to him about how I'm feeling?
Should I tell him about the miscarriage?
Personally it is up to you whether you want to tell him about the miscarriage. There is no right or wrong answer when it comes to that. However keep in mind that you are no longer carrying the baby and unless you have a good point in telling him I would probably just leave it at where it is. If you have told him that you feel out of love than he should know enough to get the point instead of harassing you with nasty text messages. For one, Good for you for putting yourself first. Do I think you should tell him how you are feeling? Yes and No. If you no longer want to be with him keep reassuring him that you are moving on. A relationship that is basically text messages is not a relationship that is going to be successful. If you two had sex when you two met all the time than clearly that is all it was. I'm not saying that when he text you saying "I'm not the type of person you can just ignore" was a threat or what but if he doesn't stop bother you maybe step up to the plate and become more direct and stern with him.
(Rating: 5) I realize that the sentence about not being able to ignore him came out wrong. He said "Hey". and I'm too nice to just ignore him so I always respond.