about

I'm Jack/Jamie.

I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.

I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.


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Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!




--Jack

advice

I've been dating this guy for 9 months, and he treats me like crap, we dated for 4 months before that and he cheated on me, i lost my virginity to him and we almost had a baby together, we lost it at 8 weeks.

Ive been friends with this guy Ricky since 8th grade, I'm now a senior in highschool, i like Ricky but i love my boyfriend even though he treats me like crap, he always sucks up to me and i get sucked back in I've tried to brake up with him in the past but he always tells me things will change and i seriously feel as though i CAN'T break up with him i don't know why, thats just how it feels.

Ricky and i have been wanting to hook up since we like met but we just never did. Last night he told me that he liked me and he always tells me that my boyfriend is a loser and treats me like crap and i can do better. I do like Ricky but when we were talking last night we both came up to a conclusion that until we got to know each other better we should just be friends with benefits, we don't want to get attached for the wrong reasons though. We both want to hook up, and its not like im a whore and do that a lot Ive never had sex with a guy and not be dating.. and Ive only had sex with 2 guys. He isn't a player either, he hasnt had a girlfriend or sex in over a year because he simply is waiting for someone he likes, he told me he does like me but we just want to take things slow (besides the sex part)

I'M NOT GOING TO CHEAT ON MY BOYFRIEND.
I'm actually not even sure if we are still dating at this point because i called him out and messages that i found on my computer about him wanting to hook up with other girls and he wanted them to send him nude pictures. I mean i think were still together but were kinda on like a brake? it's weird.


I need advice on how to break up with him i feel so attached to him even though he treats me bad, he never physically hurts me but mentally and emotionally he does and I've lived with him now for about 5 months i dont know why i can't leave him everyone is always yelling at me to brake up with him and nobody understands that this feeling i have, it's seriously like i can't do it..?
has anyone felt like this or no what im talking about? How do i break up with him? Should i give Ricky a chance? i just dont want to be hurt anymore?

He treats you like crap. So why the hell are you still with him?

Break it off, no matter how much you don't want to, or how much he'll say it will change.

He's cheated on you repeatedly, even though you're kind of emotionally cheating on him. But hold that thought.

Break up with your "boyfriend" because he's a jerk. How? Say this: "[Boyfriend], we have to talk. I want to break up with you for real this time. And don't tell me things are going to change, because they never have. You're a liar and you've cheated on me. I deserve better than you. Goodbye!"

The fact that you're searching for someone else tells me that you're very unhappy in your relationship, so end it.

Then, after your relationship with jerkface is over, you can start to think about what you want to do with Ricky. If you want to be with him, sure, that's your choice, but it's kind of shady that he wants to "go slow (except for sex)."

I get the feeling that Ricky doesn't want a relationship with you; he just wants sex.

Why else would he "take things slow (except for sex)?"

Ricky just wants to be in your pants, and if that thought hasn't crossed your mind, I'm sorry, but I think that's the deal. He only says he wants to "get to know you better" because that's code for "I want to have sex with you, but with no strings attached."

He doesn't give a crap about you, can't you see that?

I would just take a break from guys and try to find one who will honestly like you and "take things slow" WITHOUT sex.

--Jack
(17/m)

[view]

(Rating: 4) thanks, but i no he Ricky cares about me ive been friends with him since 8th grade and he isnt the one who suggested we should hook up, i was.. but thanks everything else you said was good
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