I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 70133
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I'm male, single(never had a girlfriend before!), and 22! I speak English though I'm not from the US. We are a Catholic nation.
I have this officemate/friend of mine whom i am attracted to. She's pretty, witty, friendly, and kind. But it bothers me if i really like her for who she is because i find her noisy and sometimes i think i can't relate to her(she's full of positivity and jolliness while i am more of a serious- and silent-type of person).
However, i can't stop thinking of her. And it bothers me that when i think of her, its always about sex. It makes me wonder if i really like her or i just think of her as a sex object.
And yet, we are catholics; and she is a very devoted one. Thus, if i only like her for sex, then i won't be able to have sex with her coz the Catholic point of view of sex is that it is done after marriage; and she sticks to our religious principles.
I have actually courted her before, but stopped because of some issues like me being jealous (this is another topic/issue of which i believe i am overcoming now).
Do you think things will work out for us if i court her again? I am so attracted to her (though i don't know if my reason for attraction is right). Should i stop this? Thanks!
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I think a very big problem here is that you have not yet worked out how you feel about this girl. You say you really like her for various reasons but you can see a fault with her in that she's noisy. To be fair, even in the most loving relationships, you are not blind to each other's faults. What you need to suss here is whether you can stand to be with her in spite of what you perceive to be her faults.
If ultimately you decide you could not cope with her personality, it sounds very likely that this is nothing more than lust. Lust is more than just wanting sex with a particular person based on appearance. In order to feel a sexual attraction, it has to be deeper than looks. After all, you wouldn't fancy a serial killer purely because they looked like a model.
After you have worked out whether you can accept her faults, if you decide that you can, there is no reason you can't see if you would like to give a relationship with her another try. You need to make sure you are ready for a relationship and can handle your jealousy issues. As long as you are sure you can, I wish you the best of luck with her. You may not find love, but at least you will have given it a try and will no longer be left wondering "what if?"
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Rating: 5
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True. I might say "what if??" I think I can bear with her. Thanks a lot Vikki!:)
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