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about
I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)
advice
I hate to say it, but -- Loneliness is getting the best of me. I want to be able to say "God is enough, all i need to be happy" or "I'm satisfied just having my family and a few close friends", but I can't, I'm not. I constantly find myself longing for the "myspace" life. Having lots of gorgeous female friends and funny male friends to do fun things with and take lots of pictures with. To have people constantly calling me. TO FEEL LOVED. This is not a question of how to make friends - go out, join a sports club, church group.. I know, I know, I know. Whatever.
I probably wouldn't be satisfied anyways. I keep longing for other peoples lives. And in a weak attempt to become them.. I get their hairdos, clothing styles, and even opinions. But (ofcourse) it doesn't work.
Help me please, I can't remember ever being satisfied. I've always hated myself, my friends, my life.
I'm lonely and I fear always feeling this way.
I know what you're probably going to think before I say this, but just hear me out. I think that you should get some counseling. You're not crazy. You're not stupid. Many, many people feel the way that you do. The problem is, it's affecting you a lot. It's one thing to know that you should be satisfied, but that knowledge isn't going to make you satisfied. It's one thing to feel envious of other people or ideas, but it's quite another to want to and actually try to be like them. This is a really tough situation that you're probably not going to be able to get through on your own. Talking with a friend about it isn't going to help too much because they most likely won't understand what you're going through since they're young too and are facing the same pressures. An adult will either baby you or tell you to grow up, neither of which is what you need. A professional, though, will be able to give you the most good advice and assistance in getting over this. You don't necessarily have to see a psychologist. Just talk to the counselor at your school. There's a reason why they are there. For people like you that have problems that aren't so serious they need to see a doctor or go through extensive therapy. Your school counselor is there for issues of self-esteem, belonging, and the pressures that teens face today. So please talk to a counselor about this, it really will help and you do need help. Good luck. :)
(Rating: 5) Thank you. It feels like you actually care, and I appreciate that.