BIOGRAPHY:
My name is Carrie, and I just recently turned 25. I've been told that I give excellent advice, so I created this column last year with the intention of helping as many people as possible. Although I do believe I succeeded, I ultimately turned my back on this column when I discovered just how cruel and thankless some people can be. Almost one year later a lot has changed. I've gained a whole new perspective on life and the world around me. I'm much more positive, sympathetic, and willing to listen when people truly need help. So now I've decided to come back and focus my attention on the individuals who are truly in need of advice.
ADVICE:
I'm very genuine when it comes to giving advice. I try to be sympathetic to the person asking the question, but I don't ever sugar coat things. I've learned quickly that many people who ask for help don't really want advice - they want someone who will say what they want to hear. Sorry, but you're not going to get that with me. I'm not here to make friends (if a friendship happens though, yay for me!). You'll always get the truth from me whether you like it or not. While the truth may sting just a bit to begin with, it will absolutely set you free in the long run. If you want to be lied to, please seek advice from somebody else.
CONTACT INFO:
If you like my advice and have additional questions for me, click on the link right underneath this profile that says "Ask Me A Question." If you leave your follow-up question for me in my feedback, I have no way of replying to it. Please use the link. Also, I have an e-mail address where people can get in touch with me if they need to. Feel free to use it.
IMPORTANT:
This may be a hobby in some people's eyes, but I don't like it when people waste my time regardless of whatever it is I'm doing, which in this case, is providing a free service out of the kindness of my heart. So please don't ask me stupid questions, and please make an effort to type sensibly so that I can read and understand your question. I know there are a lot of young people on this site, but that's no excuse to type like you're brain dead. Proper grammar, spelling, and punctuation is highly appreciated with me. The more intelligent your question is, the more intelligent of a response you'll get from me.
ABOUT ME:
Here are some facts about me. I like pop music (especially Madonna). I like horror movies (especially Scream). I like to chat (on MSN). I love to write (poetry, screenplays, short stories). I love shopping (Best Buy). I'm a gamer (I'm better than a guy - Xbox 360 all the way). I have a MySpace (Click "Ask Carrie" for the link). I love my doggies (I have 2). I'm not a bitch (...well, sometimes). I love to laugh (and sometimes I pee a little when I do). It happens.
Website: Ask Carrie
E-mail: soundslikepink@gmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: South Carolina
Occupation: What's that?
Age: 25
Member Since: June 10, 2007
Answers: 195
Last Update: September 13, 2008
Visitors: 17166
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okay so i don't know what to do. i've been going out with this girl for over a year now and i'm starting to get board. we have sex, that's great, but i'm not used to being with people, i can't break up with her, she'd be devstated. i don't know how to tell her that i'm just so board, but i don't know how to make things interesting again... can anyone help? please! (link)
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Aww. You're cute. There's not enough guys on this site asking for advice. We need more like you...
And since you are seeking advice, let me just suggest that you might care more about her than you think you do. I bring this up because if you break up with her or ask her for some space, you may lose her forever and regret it for the rest of your life.
Being a boyfriend and being loyal isn't about being entertained. She's not a video game or a movie - she's a human being. No matter who you go out with, you're going to end up bored. That's just life. You might consider changing your expectations.
I'm afraid that if you don't start working on this behavior now, you could become one of those lonely bachelors who goes from girl to girl searching for something that he can't ever find. Guys who get bored in relationships usually end up alone because familiarity is boring.
However, since I don't know all of the circumstances, I'm not going to just advise you to just deal with it. There's a chance that you don't have relationship ADD and that girlfriend is just a very boring girl. In that case, it's better you act now than holding it in and resenting her.
If you're interested in staying with her, you need to have a talk with her. It needs to be an open and honest talk where you do most of the talking. You need to break it to her gently that you care for her and want to remain loyal to her, but that things are too routine for you.
When you talk to her, try to think of gentle replacement words. For example, instead of saying things are "boring" to you, tell her they've become "routine". Instead of saying you want to make things "interesting again," tell her you'd like to try doing "new things."
Some suggestions: Start doing different activities together and going different places. Take up a sport with her - play tennis against each other or join a bowling league together. Refrain from having sex and seeing each other as often. Allow yourself the chance to miss it and each other.
If you're unsure if you want to stay with her, still have the talk and tell her that you need some space. She might be sad, but she'll be happier in the long run when/if you miss her and want to get back together. That's better than you saying nothing, staying bored, and cheating.
If you're over the relationship, then just end it. Don't drag it out - you'll just make it harder for her. Just tell her the truth, but do it in a gentle way. Don't tell her that she's boring and you'd rather die than spend another day with her.Save that conversation for your future divorce.
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Rating: 5
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thank you, that's some really great advice, and i think if i see less of her things will get better, after all i see her 16 hours everyday... it gets old
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