I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 70112
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I am so frusturated today. I'm usually giving advice, but right now I don't have any for myself. I have been best friends with this one girl for 2 years and I'm really close with both her and her daughter, but she is constantly using me and lying to me. Finally I got fed up of her and called her to tell her she only cares about her self and then hung up. Does this diserve an apolgie? I don't plan on giving one, but I wanted to know what everyone else thought. (link)
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In my personal opinion, I don't think it merits an apology, necessarily, but perhaps an explanation is required.
I had a friend who was exactly the same, so I can understand where you're coming from. When someone only makes use of you because "you're there" and lies to you constantly, it's very difficult to put up with. If you're anything like me when I was in your position, it's probably also been building up for a while because you let her get away with it for so long.
The fact is that it is pointless referring to someone as a friend if they don't act like one to you. You need to trust your friends and know they will be there for you and support you. If she mainly lies and uses you, to such an extent where her actions are inexcusable, then you have every right to terminate the friendship.
However, it might be that her behaviour is without thought. She may well have been using you and lying to you...but is she necessarily aware of it? I know that might sound stupid but some people don't even realise when they're telling lies, especially when they affect others. Also, she may not be intentionally using you, but rather using you thoughtlessly, in an "I want to talk to someone because I'm bored. I know, I'll ring..." As this is a possibility, I think you need to explain to her exactly why it is you no longer wish to be friends.
Perhaps you could send her an e-mail? Or, if you think you can manage it, call her and perhaps apologise for the bluntness of your previous call, before explaining what led you to your outburst. Tell her that you don't feel you can continue to tolerate her treatment of you and you no longer wish to be friends.
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Rating: 5
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Thank you for the advice, we did have contact through myspace, but I don't think i'll be calling her my "friend" for much longer.
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