I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 70117
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my friend has tried to kill himself before. i just dont see why somebody why somebody would do that. because if you kill yourself, you automattically go to hell. and hell is more worse than anything you can be going through at the moment. so why would somebody wanna do this? i dont need help explaining this to my friend, he got help and he agrees with me on this. (link)
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The truth is that nobody can ever really understand the reasons behind wanting to die so badly that you try to go through with it. Unless you have been there yourself.
When you're living every single day of your life, not hating anything, not liking anything but just not FEELING anything, it just doesn't matter any more. There are those of us who believe in God who truly believe that at that point, nothing could be worse than the black hole they are in. For those of us who don't believe in God, it just doesn't matter. Heaven and hell don't enter into the equation and the only thing that matters is getting away from yourself because you can't stand to be you, in your mind, in your body, for another minute.
Everyone who goes through this has their own personal opinions as to why they want it all to end and their own explanation of how they got there, so you can't generalise it perfectly for everyone. However, the closest I can get is that it seems like the only option for escape for many people out there, even though the light at the end of the tunnel could be 10 minutes, 10 days or 10 weeks away.
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