I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 70202
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Families
View All
Favorite Columnists
karenR
DangerNerd
Razhie
isis
Xenolan
ScratchesOnTheWall
not_your_star34
alisonmarie
HectorJr
BitsandPieces
sassysara
more...
|
| |
Okay, i dont usually do this, but i cant trust my friends with this one. I have a boyfriend who ive been dating for 13 months. in the last four months, ive started to fall for a guy i work with and have been working with for two years, we are jokingly refered to as the work couple. lately my boyfriend and i have been fighting a lot, and i spend more time at work (im working full time this summer) i dont think that i will be truly happy with either relationship, but the situation im in right now isnt appealing either. i feel like im losing interest in my boyfriend, yet i love him just as much.
what do i do? (link)
|
The chances are that the reason you are feeling bored with your current relationship is because you feel as though it isn't working, whereas your working relationship with this other guy seems to be flourishing and it is giving you a taste of something new.
What you need to do now is to work out what the problems are with your boyfriend. You say you love him, so clear a weekend where you can spend all the time together and try to work through some of your issues. Relationships ARE hard work and if you want them to be successful, you need to try hard to work through your problems. So try both of you working out what the issues are that you have with each other and then take it in turns to confront each other. Make an agreement first of all that there will be NO interrupting, or shouting, or swearing or abusive language. Listen to what each other has to say and try to see things frm each other's point of view. The chances are, a few home truths might come out and they WILL sting but relationships force us to confront the things we don't like about ourselves and learn not only to accept we have those faults but that we can change them.
After you have done all this and cleared the air (by this, I mean don't stop until you are done with the issues you were faced with), you should find things start to improve because each time you do things that you know upset each other, you can call yourselves on it before the other does, hence preventing the argument. Don't be afraid to be creative with your solution to your problems. If you think he swears too much or goes out with his friends more than he spends time with you, come up with action plans. Set up a swear box or make sure that whenever he gets to go out with his friends, you get to go out with yours or have your friends over.
Finally, the problem with the guy at work is, I suspect, purely that you are feeling fairly trapped in your current relationship and are looking to him for an escape. If you sort things out with your boyfriend then your feelings for this other guy might just fizzle out. If, however, you find that after resolving your issues with your boyfriend, you are still very much attracted to this other guy and feel more strongly for him (lust is the exception, being a usually temporary longing only) than your boyfriend, you owe it to yourself and your partner to call it a day. Even if you don't date the guy at work, it would be unfair to continue your relationship with your boyfriend if you know that there is something more out there.
Don't give up yet because there is hope for your relationship. If that doesn't work, then perhaps a fresh start really would be best for the both of you.
|
|