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There is more than one person in my love life..
Okay, i dont usually do this, but i cant trust my friends with this one. I have a boyfriend who ive been dating for 13 months. in the last four months, ive started to fall for a guy i work with and have been working with for two years, we are jokingly refered to as the work couple. lately my boyfriend and i have been fighting a lot, and i spend more time at work (im working full time this summer) i dont think that i will be truly happy with either relationship, but the situation im in right now isnt appealing either. i feel like im losing interest in my boyfriend, yet i love him just as much.
what do i do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hun, if your feelings are wavering with your boyfriend and you are at least 100% to 90% in like or in love with him, then get out. If you don't get out now the attactment will become stronger for him and you will shatter his heart even more. But if you were to break up with him, DON'T date your friend at work right away. That would be the worst. Don't have your boyfriend think that you left him for another guy! And just take some time on figuring out what you feel for this work guy, there is no need to rush. Stay single for awhile, everyone knows it can be quite fun!
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Dear I've Got Twy Boys In My Love Life,
I think that you need to set yourself straight by thinking who do you like etter and who do you need more in your life. What is the use in having a boyfriend if you don't barely see him. You see the other boy you work with more and you like him. I am not telling you to dump someone I am just asking who do you need more in your life? That's the question.Good Luck!
<3 Alli
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The chances are that the reason you are feeling bored with your current relationship is because you feel as though it isn't working, whereas your working relationship with this other guy seems to be flourishing and it is giving you a taste of something new.
What you need to do now is to work out what the problems are with your boyfriend. You say you love him, so clear a weekend where you can spend all the time together and try to work through some of your issues. Relationships ARE hard work and if you want them to be successful, you need to try hard to work through your problems. So try both of you working out what the issues are that you have with each other and then take it in turns to confront each other. Make an agreement first of all that there will be NO interrupting, or shouting, or swearing or abusive language. Listen to what each other has to say and try to see things frm each other's point of view. The chances are, a few home truths might come out and they WILL sting but relationships force us to confront the things we don't like about ourselves and learn not only to accept we have those faults but that we can change them.
After you have done all this and cleared the air (by this, I mean don't stop until you are done with the issues you were faced with), you should find things start to improve because each time you do things that you know upset each other, you can call yourselves on it before the other does, hence preventing the argument. Don't be afraid to be creative with your solution to your problems. If you think he swears too much or goes out with his friends more than he spends time with you, come up with action plans. Set up a swear box or make sure that whenever he gets to go out with his friends, you get to go out with yours or have your friends over.
Finally, the problem with the guy at work is, I suspect, purely that you are feeling fairly trapped in your current relationship and are looking to him for an escape. If you sort things out with your boyfriend then your feelings for this other guy might just fizzle out. If, however, you find that after resolving your issues with your boyfriend, you are still very much attracted to this other guy and feel more strongly for him (lust is the exception, being a usually temporary longing only) than your boyfriend, you owe it to yourself and your partner to call it a day. Even if you don't date the guy at work, it would be unfair to continue your relationship with your boyfriend if you know that there is something more out there.
Don't give up yet because there is hope for your relationship. If that doesn't work, then perhaps a fresh start really would be best for the both of you.
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talk to your boyfriend about how you feel. tell him that you really love him and everything but lately you guys have been fighting a lot.
he'll probably then try to change so that you guys will stop fighting and you'll be more happy with him.
just dont tell him about the guy at work. just talk to the guy at work normally and dont flirt with him, because that might give him the wrong idea, and he might start to think that you like him.=]
♥
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talk to your bf about your fighting and just keep it on the down low about the worker guy and try to work things out before making any drastic changes
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Hey,
i know how it feels to be feeling for two guys, and your just stuck in the middle and you don't know who to choose or what to do.
First of all, when i read your problem and i read how you've been with your boyfriend for 13 months now, i thought to myself" wow, its a miracle how relationships can go on for so long"and i also thought" then they are probably crazy about each other, and thats why they've been dating for all the time".
you know, its a real shame, to back out of a 13 years relationship, and i am telling you that now before you do back out and then you'd regret it and keep crying about it day and night for the next 13 months and post a question on the site and say " i miss him".
i've learnt in this life, that when a person has something that he really loves and cherishes and is so crazy about it, then take advantage of the fact that you have it and own it, and grasp it really tight and don't let it go, because i don't want you to get hurt when you do such an action like breaking up with your boyfriend.
Now, you feel like your losing interest in your boyfriend, but you only think you are because you are too distracted with that guy with you in work.And since you work full time this summer, than he's probably the only one you see alot, and even much more than you see your own boyfriend. So my opinion is that you go and try to fix things with your boyfriend, because i would never choose that guy who works with me on my own boyfriend, whom i really love so much, and i know you wouldn't either and you won't. Because if you did break up, and went and dated the guy who works with you,then you'd be practically betraying your ex boyfriend.
And don't think that you won't be truly happy with either relationships,because you can be happy with your boyfriend, if you try and sit together and work things out together, and mabye you could go out and have some fun, and forget all the troubles between you. because for 13 months, he cared about you and loved you and was there for you. And although i am also sure that the guy works with you was also nice and that you had some fun moments and memories with him ,but you ask your self that question, " was that guy with me at work much better than my boyfriend who i spent with 13 months, and who i'm ready to waste our relationship with because a couple of silly fights?" you ask yourself that question and you answer it yourself,and i don't think you need advice on that one.
So, be reasonable and open minded,and don't lose something so precious you have now and could be so happy with,and then you'd cry for losing it in the future.
finally, if you need any other help or advice, please be free to contact me.
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Hi there, you've first of all need to figure out why it is you are losing interest in your boyfriend. Once you've figured that out then the next step is to talk it over sometime with your boyfriend. It wouldn't be fair to just dump him when he hasn't even heared how you feel. It requires communication towards each others feelings in a relationship for it to work out. It sounds as though you have lust for this guy at work. Your attracted to him, yet you love your boyfriend and have been together for over a year. I would personally keep with your boyfriend and please just talk to him about how you feel. Even though lust is nice, I think love is greater. Daniel.
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Well, if youre not happy in youre current relationship, then i think you should end it. You arent being fair to youre bf or to yourself. But, if you think there is something there, take a breather and sit somewhere you like to go and think about what you should do. The right answwer will come to you. And remember everything happens for a reason.
You could also tell youre bf that you want to take a break and see other people, then you can date the guy from work and seee how you like that. The only bad thing about that is that ure bf will be able to date anybody he wants as well.
Good luck
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I had the same problem. I ended up having to dump my boyfriend because he was living with his real girlfriend, but anyhow, you need to choose one or the other. Going with 2 guys is always a bad idea. You could always in the ends wind up with neithor of them. If you feel like you don't like eithor of them then i would try to move on from both of them and find someone who will make you feel like you are in a relationship you should be in. It sounds to me like you are beginning to have stronger feelings for the guy at work... You should talk to your current boyfriend about the fighting you are doing. Try to patch things up. If not, then maybe you shouldn't be in that relationship since you are fighting so much. Give the work guy a try. Explore new options. You may find yourself happier with him.
Hope i helped a bit. and i hope things work out with you. It's all up to you and how you feel... Think About It!
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