I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
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Ok,I'm 18/F and the other day I caught my brother he's 16 dressed in my clothes,I mean everything bra,panties,mini-skirt the works when he saw me he started crying,,,,too make a long story short he told me he has been wearing my clothes for a while and that he wants to be a girl. He said that he's sick of pretending and asked if I would help him shop and teach him about makeup,I love my brother an told him I would but I find this very weird. What should I do ????? (link)
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The best thing you can do right now is to support your brother in every way possible. He's obviously feeling very vulnerable about this right now and it is quite a big issue. That being said, it's not at all uncommon, as I for one have come across a lot of stories from women feeling they should have been born men or men feeling they should have been born women.
The most important thing you need to bear in mind is that he's been keeping this secret a long time now, feeling it is something to be ashamed of and you are the person he has come to about it, which means he must really trust you.
First thing is I really think you both need to break this to your parents. Gently, because it might be really difficult for them to handle. Let him do the talking but stand by him and let him know that whatever they say, you will be there for him.
After this point, it is really up to him how far this goes. You can accept his lifestyle and help him wear women's clothes and make up and so on but he needs to be prepared for the fact that the general public tend to be very cruel about cross-dressing, rather than understanding. If he wants to go out in public dressed like this, there's nothing wrong with it but some people will insist on making life hard for him. However, if he is happy to push ahead with it then help him as much as you feel comfortable with. Teach him about make up and clothes so that he knows what he can and cannot wear to make himself feel beautiful.
As time goes on, he may decide that he wants to physically become a woman. Sex change operations do not come cheaply and it is a long and gruelling process, as he will need to take hormone medication, which will make his body change. They have made medical advances now as far as this goes that means he can have real female 'parts' put in and I have heard of cases where men have had their voice boxes operated on to give them a more feminine voice.
Whatever he decides to do, the best thing you can do is to let him know you will be there for him every step of the way. It's okay to tell him that you find it weird. There may not be anything wrong with the way he feels but that doesn't mean that it is not unusual at all so feel free to let him know how you feel about this. It's better that you tell him straight out than to let him worry that you might feel it and not tell him.
Finally, please don't worry about whether or not you are handling it correctly. There's no manual on how to cope with a close relative or friend that suddenly reveals they are a cross dresser (especially when they also reveal they were cross dressing in your clothes!) but you must be doing something right or he wouldn't have told you about it in the first place.
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Rating: 5
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Thanks,you gave me really great advice.....and I'm trying to help my brother the best I can.
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