Hi Everyone!!
My name is Brenda, and I'm 34 years young. I've been happily married (to the most amazing man) for three years, and we have three children. My daughter is nine years old (my husband has adopted her), my stepdaughter is eight, and my stepson is six. I am currently a full time college student taking Business Administration specializing in Human Resource Management. I am also a volunteer with the Sexual Assault Victim Support Program with our Regional Health Authority.
My hope with this advice column is that I will be able to help people. I've been through alot in my life, and I decided that if I can help people in similar situations, then that could also help me heal, and move on. I won't go into great detail on here, but my motto has definitely become "what doesn't kill us, will only make us stronger".
I was raped when I was 16, and then continually by an abusive boyfriend when I was 19-20. He was an alcoholic and abusive sexually, physically, and emotionally. He unsuccessfully (thank God) tried to kill me.
I've been cheated on...been the cheater, I've gone through addiction, as well as losing my dad. I have clinical depression. I was a single mom for five years before I met my husband. I became extremely obese, and five years ago weighed close to 400 pounds. In January of 2000 I underwent gastric bypass surgery and have maintained a 200+ pound weight loss. I went through my childhood and adolescense being ridiculed for my appearance. I really want to help people with obesity issues.
Currently, my most stressing issues seem to be dealing with my husbands despicable ex-wife. It's hard to deal with someone whom you have absolutely no respect for as a parent, or as a person for that matter. I have many concerns about making a blended family work, so that everyone is happy.
PHEW!!!
Well....I hope I will have many visitors to my column and can help each and every one of you! Chances are..whatever it is you're going through, I've probably been there. I hope to talk to you soon.
Brenda
Website: Help Me, Brenda!
E-mail: helpmebrenda@inbox.com
Gender: Female
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Occupation: student
Age: 34
Member Since: April 9, 2006
Answers: 193
Last Update: October 5, 2006
Visitors: 22468
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Brenda!
I feel hopeless, I'm 15 female,
and I dont have a boyfriend.
I dont feel that I need one, and I know its bad to be in a relationship when you think you NEED a boyfriend you know?
But everyone says to wait, and eventually I'll find one, but alot of girls my age are in relationships, and I just dont understand why I'm not yet, I mean I'm confident in myself, I'm happy with who I am.
I'm not desperate, I'm just a little confused, why all the popular people get into meaningless relationships, and I havent had a boyfriend ever in my life yet.
Blahh what can you make of that?
thankss
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Hi
I can soooo relate to you my dear! I didn't have my first boyfriend till I was 17. All my friends had boyfriends, and I always felt like the third wheel.
You said yourself that popular people get into meaningless relationships, and end up being miserable. You wouldn't want that anyway.
It's excellent that you are confident in yourself, and you're happy with who you are. Alot of teens can't say the same thing.
The right guy is going to come along (sooner rather than later), and he is going to notice how confident you are, and he's going to want to know you. Confidence is such a HUGE boost to one's character....a major turn on.
Don't ever change who you are to try and land a guy, just for the sake of getting one...it will backfire on you.
Have you ever heard the saying "it's better to be alone for the right reasons, than be together with someone for the wrong reasons"? It's so true..always remember it.
Let the popular girls weed out all the losers, and rejects...that way the good ones will be ready for you.
Take care, and keep being your great self!
Brenda
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Rating: 5
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Aww thank you so so so much!
You helped a lot! like you dont even knwo! so much :D thanks!
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