First off thanks for dropping it in my inbox, feel free to do so any other time.

Should you break up with your boyfriend? That is ultimately your decision. First you should talk to your current boyfriend and tell him how you feel about everything. Yes tell him that you think things are too serious right now, that you don't like it that way, and that you don't like him as much as you do. Why? Well if things were the other way around, and he was the one that didn't like you as much, wouldn't you want him to tell you that instead of just pretending or going along with it?

You both need to communicate, you owe it to yourselves as boyfriend and girlfriend, and even just as friends. It is always difficult to not hurt someones feelings when you want to break up with them, but I think its even more difficult to explain yourself and get through the situation if it was two months later and then you confessed you didn't like him as much since the beginning. So while you might hurt his feelings by telling him soon, better sooner than later.

Before you do talk to him, give yourself a chance. Since he's been like this only recently, things could shape up or change a bit - you never know. So I say wait a bit, not too long, but enough time to decide for yourself if it really is true that you don't like whats going on at the moment. I say maybe a week or two is enough time.

You could also try asking him why he's so serious about all this all of a sudden, before you let him know you don't like it. You don't have to ask him in a tone or way to show that you dislike it, but just ask him like you would any question.


About your other friend...tough. Are you sure you have strong feelings for him? Again, I would say to wait a week or two to see if things have settled in. Think about it some more. Is he your friend as much as you are his friend? Before you would even question him as an option for a boyfriend, you have to see him as a friend first. Also, you want to make sure you really know this guy too. I'm not saying you don't know him, but just that sometimes we see the better in people and like that, instead of waiting to see all of the person, good and bad, and then deciding. So I think it would be unwise to suddenly break up with your boyfriend just to be available for your other friend.

First, if you feel like your feelings for your friend are stronger than that for your boyfriend, and you don't want to continue anymore, then first go off by letting your boyfriend know that you think you might like somebody else. Then move on by letting your other friend know that you like him. Yes, letting him know is something you should definately do. It could very well be that he is trying to not like you because he knows you have a boyfriend. Whatever the case is, let him know. Even if you let him know that you like your friend, if he doesn't feel the same way for whatever reason, that doesn't mean you still can't be friends. In other words - let your boyfriend know that you like somebody else, and let your friend know that you like him.

Sorry my answer is so long, but I wanted to make sure everything was clear. If not or I didn't totally answer, let me know right away. So it really is up to you. Give it some time to think things through. You should definately give your boyfriend somewhat of a chance to see if he changes, and also let him know that you don't like the seriousness as much. But whatever your decision, good luck and I hope that helped. Feel free to ask me anything else anytime!

yeah, really long!! =]=] but thanks. It's such a great answer! and i mean, even though the best way to go about this is written down right infront of me, Im still so unsure! See this guy, hes like my best guy friend.... I love him to death, but I just cant stand him at the same time---- like, yeah im just not sure. So ok. thanks. You give great advice! Im so printing this; its gunna be my bible for about a week till the rain makes it slush. So again thanks.

Feel free to ask me any questions or for an alternate way of contacting me through my inbox.

I really like giving advice, so thats why I have a column here. I've been inactive for a long time, but I'm back and will do my best to catch up. Advicenators is a great site and it is what we make it. Having my own advice column helped me learn a lot of new things, even about myself, while giving me the chance to help others along the way. Thanks.

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