Hi Everyone!!
My name is Brenda, and I'm 34 years young. I've been happily married (to the most amazing man) for three years, and we have three children. My daughter is nine years old (my husband has adopted her), my stepdaughter is eight, and my stepson is six. I am currently a full time college student taking Business Administration specializing in Human Resource Management. I am also a volunteer with the Sexual Assault Victim Support Program with our Regional Health Authority.
My hope with this advice column is that I will be able to help people. I've been through alot in my life, and I decided that if I can help people in similar situations, then that could also help me heal, and move on. I won't go into great detail on here, but my motto has definitely become "what doesn't kill us, will only make us stronger".
I was raped when I was 16, and then continually by an abusive boyfriend when I was 19-20. He was an alcoholic and abusive sexually, physically, and emotionally. He unsuccessfully (thank God) tried to kill me.
I've been cheated on...been the cheater, I've gone through addiction, as well as losing my dad. I have clinical depression. I was a single mom for five years before I met my husband. I became extremely obese, and five years ago weighed close to 400 pounds. In January of 2000 I underwent gastric bypass surgery and have maintained a 200+ pound weight loss. I went through my childhood and adolescense being ridiculed for my appearance. I really want to help people with obesity issues.
Currently, my most stressing issues seem to be dealing with my husbands despicable ex-wife. It's hard to deal with someone whom you have absolutely no respect for as a parent, or as a person for that matter. I have many concerns about making a blended family work, so that everyone is happy.
PHEW!!!
Well....I hope I will have many visitors to my column and can help each and every one of you! Chances are..whatever it is you're going through, I've probably been there. I hope to talk to you soon.
Brenda
Website: Help Me, Brenda!
E-mail: helpmebrenda@inbox.com
Gender: Female
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Occupation: student
Age: 34
Member Since: April 9, 2006
Answers: 193
Last Update: October 5, 2006
Visitors: 22472
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ok so their is this one boy and i really like him. i finally got the courage to tell him and when i did he told me he like me lots too. i was so incredable happy! then a few weeks after that their was a party that we bolth went to and we hung out and ended up making out on the floor.
but little did i know his ex girlfriend walked in the room and spoiled it. he didnt care but i did it felt so wierd! so i told him and he had been calling me prude. every friday my friends and i go hang out at this place and he was their and we ended up making out their too. but then some how my mother found out and she said that she didnt want me to have any relationship with him. so i tried getting over him. i went to another party and he wasnt their and this one guy i had a crush on for 2 years was their and we ended making out! it was so much fun. but then it got around school. then i found out that the guy i had like for 2 years was going to ask out my friend. and he didnt really like me. i was devistated. then the boy i had made out with twice told me he still liked me and of coarce i still liked him. but then he started flirting with other girls ALL THE TIME! i have been dealing with this FOREVER and the other night i told him i couldnt take it anymore and i couldnt like him i also told him i just wanted to be friends. he sat down and looked like he was going to cry and i dont know if he did because he was wearing glasses. but then he still had enough happyness to be all over another girl. so i felt bad so i went to talk to him and he said that i was the player and the flirt and i told him all the girls he was flriting with that night. then he told me that they where all over him. i had upset him so much he didnt want anything to do with me. what do i do? do i say im sorry? do i stay mad at him for LIFE? what in the world do i do? i NEED advice badly!
if it makes a difference im only 14 and he is too.
thanks! :)
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Hi
It kinda sounds to me like neither of you know exactly what you want.
You're both making out with each other, as well as other people. Maybe you're both playing a bit?
I think the two of you need to decide if you want to be together exclusively, and if that's the case then no one else should be involved.
If being together is something that you both don't want, then there is no reason why you should be mad at each other for flirting/making out with other people.
Be careful....it already sounds like your "fun" is being spread around your school, and even though you aren't having sex, people may get the wrong idea and start spreading rumors. That's the last thing you need.
It's time to be together, or walk away.
Good luck,
Brenda
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Rating: 5
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the thing is, im scared of commetment because at this age i think it should be do what you want and if you find the right guy, grab him and dont let go.
yeah about the rumor thing... people think im this bad party girl because i hang out with those kind of people but im no im more like you good girl...
thanks i think talking to him would probally be the best thing i can do for myself :)
YOUR AWESOME ♥
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