Hi Everyone!!
My name is Brenda, and I'm 34 years young. I've been happily married (to the most amazing man) for three years, and we have three children. My daughter is nine years old (my husband has adopted her), my stepdaughter is eight, and my stepson is six. I am currently a full time college student taking Business Administration specializing in Human Resource Management. I am also a volunteer with the Sexual Assault Victim Support Program with our Regional Health Authority.
My hope with this advice column is that I will be able to help people. I've been through alot in my life, and I decided that if I can help people in similar situations, then that could also help me heal, and move on. I won't go into great detail on here, but my motto has definitely become "what doesn't kill us, will only make us stronger".
I was raped when I was 16, and then continually by an abusive boyfriend when I was 19-20. He was an alcoholic and abusive sexually, physically, and emotionally. He unsuccessfully (thank God) tried to kill me.
I've been cheated on...been the cheater, I've gone through addiction, as well as losing my dad. I have clinical depression. I was a single mom for five years before I met my husband. I became extremely obese, and five years ago weighed close to 400 pounds. In January of 2000 I underwent gastric bypass surgery and have maintained a 200+ pound weight loss. I went through my childhood and adolescense being ridiculed for my appearance. I really want to help people with obesity issues.
Currently, my most stressing issues seem to be dealing with my husbands despicable ex-wife. It's hard to deal with someone whom you have absolutely no respect for as a parent, or as a person for that matter. I have many concerns about making a blended family work, so that everyone is happy.
PHEW!!!
Well....I hope I will have many visitors to my column and can help each and every one of you! Chances are..whatever it is you're going through, I've probably been there. I hope to talk to you soon.
Brenda
Website: Help Me, Brenda!
E-mail: helpmebrenda@inbox.com
Gender: Female
Location: Manitoba, Canada
Occupation: student
Age: 34
Member Since: April 9, 2006
Answers: 193
Last Update: October 5, 2006
Visitors: 22464
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Theres this guy his name is .. Max. Max is my best friend, last year we became really close. He secretly liked me and never told me, till 8 months after, when he started to go out with my friend Emily. Emily is "inlove" with Max. And Max is "inlove" with Emily. During these 8 months that Max liked me, i LIKED someone else, and was obbsessed with him. But when me and him were over, i started to relize i think i fell in love with my best friend. Now hes in a 6 month relationship. Almost everynight i write about him in a journal. I told him before I might have fell for him, and he said oohh. I don't know what to do anymore, i watch them all over eachother EVERYDAY. I cant take it any more, Does anyone know what i can do?
P.S a little advice to some girls, if you have a best friend who likes you alot, and everyone says you guys should go out. Give him a chance.
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Hi
This is a tough one, because Emily is a friend. You can pretty much bet there are going to be hurt feelings over this.
Max knows how you feel, and you know how he feels...unfortunately what you have to do now is wait.
You don't want to be the "reason" Max and Emily break up....let that happen all on it's own. If Max truly does want to be with you, then their relationship will end.
You have to remember to consider Emily's feelings, and how she is going to feel when he breaks up with her to go out with you.
I would try my best to carry on with your life until he can make a decision. However, I wouldn't wait "forever". If he truly wants to be with you, he will wrap up his relationship in a timely manner with Emily.
I know how hard it must be to see them together everyday. Can you distance yourself from them a bit? I hope for everyone's sake you two will end up together soon.
Good luck, and take care.
Brenda
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Rating: 5
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good adviceee.
well its been 3 months later.
&& me and him are finally together
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