About lucretia
I have been on this site a little while now, and while I have never been one of its more prolific columnists, I do read a helluva lot more questions than I answer. The reason for this is that I feel that a lot of the questions are very similar, so I tend to pick the better worded and/or more interesting ones among them:plus I without fail will answer anything you care to drop in my inbox. But for those of you whose questions I do not specifically address, here are my top five tips to make the world(and advicenators, which is after all the hub of the universe) a better place:
Enjoy!
1)You will generally be happier if you are not
constantly taking your emotional temperature. So much stress is placed these days on FEELING, that people forget that the way to FEEL happy is to DO. So get over yourself and take up skateboarding, drumming(which I highly recommend) "mumblety-peg, if that's where your heart lies". Whatever it is though, just get on with it and you'll be allright.
2) If s/he says "you're too good for me", then s/he isn't interested. End of story.
3)Honour thy father and thy mother, unless they're actually beating the crap out of you, in which case you need to call on outside agents to mediate.In all other cases though, take it easy on your folks-you won't regret it later in life.
4)In 90% of cases, cheating is unaccepatable and inexcusable. If you think that your partner is part of the 10% (or whatever random minority)of excusable cheaters, then ask yourself why. Is it because you're such hell to live with that it's a miracle that anyone would date you, let alone stay faithful? If it is , then you have one of two problems; you either have a personality disorder which makes you undateable, or you have such low self esteem that you believe yourself undateable. In either case, you need help, so go to a counselor, therapist, doctor, whatever, just sort it out.
5) Read self-help books. Just take them with a pinch of salt. Seriously, they make great reading, and can give remarkably sound advice, but you must not believe every word they say, or you will very possibly end up resembling , if not actually becoming , a speed freaked zombie wearing day-glo juicy couture. By self help books, I mean any thing which gives you x number of rules to live by, and suggests that the key to fulfillment lies within these rule(a bit like I'm doing now-book my '07 convention early to avoid disappointment.10% discount for advicenators columnists).Books to approach with caution include "The Rules" and the "Surrendered" series by Laura Doyle. But the jewel in the self help crown has to be the beautiful "The Bitch Rules" by Elizabeth Wurtzel. If you can read this book and not smile, laugh, and just feel unfettered joy at living, you are either the aforementioned zombie, or you are living in some banana republic. In either case, you are beyond my help,but I feel you.
Take care!
Lucretia
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Website: My LiveJournal
E-mail: lucrece_13@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Glasgow
Occupation: Student
Age: 22
Member Since: September 9, 2005
Answers: 155
Last Update: August 29, 2006
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So I'll try to keep this short--
I'm a freshman this year. In November, me, this guy Seth, a junior, and a few other people went bowling. After, it was dark and we were walking around. It was like the group in front of us, and then Seth and me. In the middle of December, we were both at a party. It wasn't hardcore, but it was like a get-together. At like 10:15 he was like, "At least there are still SOME hot girls here." He said this to me. In the past couple days, more and more people have been saying, "Hey, I think Seth likes you. He said you were really hot." or "Seth said there was only one hot girl in (a club we're in), and that's you." Today, I gave a presentation to our school, he was sitting on the floor (I was on stage) under me and was staring at me the whole time. He has been staring at me a lot lately, and I think he likes me.
I wonder if he likes me, or just thinks I'm hot. What do you think? Also, what do you think about a freshman dating a junior? I've never had any romantic relationship. Do you have any advice to help me get him? I like him, too (well, duh)...
Any other dating advice (not those tip websites) would be appreciated.
Oh, and I don't see him very often, but we do go to the same school.
I would advise you to think about dating him, but also to go carefully. I say this last because guys who are too hung up on how beautiful a girl is are not really the best canidates for boyfriends-it tends to be the immature guys, or the ones with self issues, who bother about looks the most. That said, attraction is certainly neccesary, and the fact that he finds you good to look at is certainly a starting point. One thing not to lose sight of is how much you like him-do you find him good company, amusing, kind or is a large part of it the flattery of admiration from an older boy? Don't be offended, because that would be perfectly natural. Try also to find out a bit about him-it's a sad fact that some boys in older years will hit heavily on younger girls for sex, then dump them. I'm, not saying he's like that, just that you should find out a bit about his rep. But if you're satisfied that he's a good guy, and you find each other attractive, then perhaps get one of your mutual friends to approach him, and just see how the land lies.
Have fun, and good luck!
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(Rating: 5)
I actually kinda know him. He's not like that to my knowledge, but I will look into his rep a little more. And it is extremely flattering...but that's not all. Thanks so much.
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