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I have studied psychology though I am not a psychologist or a licensed counselor of any sort. I'm an artist and writer and teach both to small private groups. I have worked with counselors by using art and writing projects at workshops to encourage people to open up, and I have been recommended by therapists to their clients to take my classes to help them understand more about themselves and what all is going on in their lives through art and writing. Though I'm not an art therapist, I use many tools from art therapy and my own experiences gleaned from counseling. I have always had the desire to help people and I do it in any way possible. Hopefully I can be of some help to many of you!
E-mail: susana182006-extra@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: Virginia
Occupation: artist & writer/teacher of both
Age: 52
Member Since: November 27, 2005
Answers: 116
Last Update: February 25, 2006
Visitors: 16715

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16/F
Alright, so this is what is going down. I am going to ask this guy out, but the thing is, whenever I go to do it, he does something or calls one of his friends over. I am asking him out because he is incredibly shy and won't do it himself. But here is the other thing, his best friend asked him what he would do if someone, like me, asked him out. He said he would just wing it, but then a couple seconds later he said that he would say yes. I don't get it. I am really confused and a little pissed off, considering I tried to do this three times and each time it fell through. Is he just avioding the question, is he nervous about answering the question or does he just not like me at all? (link)
OK, you say this guy is really shy. Maybe when a girl approaches him he doesn't know what to do or say so it's easier and safer for him to ask his buddies to join him. If his best friend asked him what he'd do if you asked him out and his answer was positive like it sounded it was, then I wouldn't worry too much about how he thinks of you. And, you obviously heard that he wouldn't mind if a girl asked him out. Meaning, he doesn't sound like the type of guy who would be offended by a girl asking him out. If you're truly interested in this guy and you're having trouble getting him alone to talk, you could always write him a sweet, SHORT note asking him if he would join you in going to the movies or wherever. If you think he's too shy to go out with you alone the first time, you could propose a second option in the note and ask him if he and his buddies would like to join you and your friends in some outing. In the note, simply ask him to call you sometime and include your telephone number so that he can choose to talk to you in private or not. You don't need to ask him if he'd go out on a date with you. Just come up with something you'd like to do with him and make your note a FRIENDLY gesture towards doing something together or with friends. You could pass the note to him in class, in the hall, or put it is his locker providing he has slits in the door like so many lockers do. Try not to give him this note in front of his friends. You don't want to embarrass him and give his friends a chance to tease him. Surely you can find some moment when he is alone to quickly pass the note to him? Give him a little while to respond. I wouldn't usually recommend a note for something like this, but it sounds as though this might be your only way to "talk" with him right now. See how he reacts to your note and then go from there. If he doesn't respond, then you'll know that you need to move on..find another interest.


Rating: 5
that was really awesome
thank you so much
if i could, i would give you two fives




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