About lucretia
I have been on this site a little while now, and while I have never been one of its more prolific columnists, I do read a helluva lot more questions than I answer. The reason for this is that I feel that a lot of the questions are very similar, so I tend to pick the better worded and/or more interesting ones among them:plus I without fail will answer anything you care to drop in my inbox. But for those of you whose questions I do not specifically address, here are my top five tips to make the world(and advicenators, which is after all the hub of the universe) a better place:
Enjoy!
1)You will generally be happier if you are not
constantly taking your emotional temperature. So much stress is placed these days on FEELING, that people forget that the way to FEEL happy is to DO. So get over yourself and take up skateboarding, drumming(which I highly recommend) "mumblety-peg, if that's where your heart lies". Whatever it is though, just get on with it and you'll be allright.
2) If s/he says "you're too good for me", then s/he isn't interested. End of story.
3)Honour thy father and thy mother, unless they're actually beating the crap out of you, in which case you need to call on outside agents to mediate.In all other cases though, take it easy on your folks-you won't regret it later in life.
4)In 90% of cases, cheating is unaccepatable and inexcusable. If you think that your partner is part of the 10% (or whatever random minority)of excusable cheaters, then ask yourself why. Is it because you're such hell to live with that it's a miracle that anyone would date you, let alone stay faithful? If it is , then you have one of two problems; you either have a personality disorder which makes you undateable, or you have such low self esteem that you believe yourself undateable. In either case, you need help, so go to a counselor, therapist, doctor, whatever, just sort it out.
5) Read self-help books. Just take them with a pinch of salt. Seriously, they make great reading, and can give remarkably sound advice, but you must not believe every word they say, or you will very possibly end up resembling , if not actually becoming , a speed freaked zombie wearing day-glo juicy couture. By self help books, I mean any thing which gives you x number of rules to live by, and suggests that the key to fulfillment lies within these rule(a bit like I'm doing now-book my '07 convention early to avoid disappointment.10% discount for advicenators columnists).Books to approach with caution include "The Rules" and the "Surrendered" series by Laura Doyle. But the jewel in the self help crown has to be the beautiful "The Bitch Rules" by Elizabeth Wurtzel. If you can read this book and not smile, laugh, and just feel unfettered joy at living, you are either the aforementioned zombie, or you are living in some banana republic. In either case, you are beyond my help,but I feel you.
Take care!
Lucretia
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Website: My LiveJournal
E-mail: lucrece_13@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: Glasgow
Occupation: Student
Age: 22
Member Since: September 9, 2005
Answers: 155
Last Update: August 29, 2006
Visitors: 18276
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Hi. I have a slight problem. There is this guy, his name is Steven. He is my sisters-bestfriend's-brother. My sister said that him and I would look cute together because we have the same type of personality. I've only talked to him online, never in person and he has a wonderful personality! What really turns me on about him is he is friendly, loves God and doesn't smoke, drink nor do drugs. I started talking to him like three days ago, and from the conversations we've had, he's called me georgeous and said I was awesome several times. (He's seen pictures of me.) I really want to meet him, and we're planning on going on like a little group date thing with two of his friends, and two of mine. (My sister and My sister's best friend.) But I'm really nervous and I'm not sure when it's going to be. I really like him and I think he likes me but I'm not sure. He lets me call him Stevie and is just a really sweet guy to me. I don't know what to do about it. I always anticipate talking to him and am really happy when I do. But, what if he thinks I'm ugly in person or have a horrid personality or something? I'm just kind of scared and don't know what to do about it! Can you please just overall assist me in my situation? Thank you very much,
MKS
Oh you lucky thing! I wish that I had a cool online boyfriend! I know what you mean though. This relationship, which has been drifting in cyberspace, too-good-to-be-true,is about to translate itself into flesh and blood. A scary, if delightful, prospect for both you and your cyber-mate. So here is where I quote from Elizabeth Wurtzel, one of my favourite popular intellectuals-"Always keep your mind on what YOU feel(my capitals)not what HE feels"(The Bitch Rules-excellent book and more approachable than her other stuff).
This is all too true. While I agree with the advice given by the other columnist(sorry I've forgotten their name :-( , that you're sure to make a great impression, don't forget that he, too, mightn't live up to YOUR expectations. With that in mind, and promising yourself not to be too disappointed if that occurs, go out there and have yourself a great time! lol Lucretia xx.
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(Rating: 5)
Thank you.
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