E-mail:
lawwing-yan@hotmail.comGender:
FemaleLocation:
Edinburgh, Scotland.Age:
20MSN:
lawwing-yan@hotmail.comMember Since:
January 20, 2011Answers:
179Last Update:
April 20, 2014Visitors:
10020about
Hey guys. I'm just a girl going through the transition of a teenager to an adult and all that it entails.
I've had a colourful life with many a lesson learned and much to offer. Whether you want advice, support or just a chat then all you gotta do is reach out.
I'm honest, whether it hurts or not, but i'm fair; open minded and philosophical, a little crazy yet very logical, at times rather controversial.
If you have a question go ahead and ask!
advice
18/Female/ Ok,sorry if this is long,but I would love it if someone responded. ok so I'm soo lonely! I have like nooo friends anymore! I also am more of a quiet person, which I hate about myself! ): because I feel like its the reason why people dont like me. Until I get to know someone pretty good or alot, then I get more comfortable and am more talkative. but heres the story, I used to have a best friend and we would do everything and go hang out with a bunch of people! but were not friends anymore, because she was into drugs and would get me into trouble, and treated me like shit, so I dropped her. I had another best friend, and we eventually kinda stoppped being friends, but we hang out occasionally and still talk. I had a good best guy friend but he's being dumb and everytime I try texting him and saying hi, he just doesnt text back and doesnt seem to care anymore. And yea, all I hang out with is my boyfriend, just me and him, or with his friends, which are guys. I need girl time too! but I have trouble making girl friends. I'm graduated and the girls I would hang out with in high school all get back together and put pics on facebook, but it makes me feel like, they dont even want to call me up and be like, Hey! we are all in town and getting back together! you should come! but no! And I took the year off from college, I should be a freshman, but I really hated school, and homework, and stressing, so I just wanted to relax, find a job, and just do my own thing. So during my free time, ive moved out and got my own apartment, I've gone to a few parties and met some people, but none that I have become best friends with, except this one girl, we've hung out and one day we were acting like we were best friends but then eventually we stopped talking, and once in awhile we talk, but I am always the one to text her or the person or say, lets hang out! no one ever says we should hang out! I feel like if I keep asking they will get annoyed with me and just not text me back. so I just pull back, and just wait to see if they they text me...but they never do! I dont know what to do..no one seems to care, except my boyfriend! I am fun, and a friendly person, but is that not enough?? Cuz the people I have hung out with have seen that side of me but yet they still make it seem like im not good enough. so what should I do? keep texting "my supposed" friends and get nothing back? or wait till they text me but that doesnt go anywhere either. but also, now its making me afraid to go to college, because I dont want to end up with noo friends, and such. yea maybe college is different from high school, but people can still be the same. ): I feel like something is wrong with me, please help!
I think we've all had friends like that and quite frankly you're better without them. If they dont consider you to be a part of their life then why should you?
I suggest you get out there a little more. If you go back to school you're bound to meet some people there, join a sport or a hobby, call up the friend you've drifted apart from and arrange a girlie night out or in. Anyone you're still in contact with them invite them out places and meet new people along the way.
Its difficult maintaining relationships sometimes but a friendship goes both ways - you both gotta pout in the
effort to keep in touch more and go out places. Put yourself in a range of social situations and be more open with people. Some may think you're closed off or less approachable because you're a little less talkative at first. Have confidence in yourself and your value as someones friend. Dont let your own insecurities and past "friends" put you off making new ones.
And believe me. College is MUCH different from high school. There are people of all ages and personalities there. Usually most people leave the immaturity at high school.
hi my names jamie im 18 and i like this guy, first i wanted to just be friends, but i am positive he likes me 2, (dont ask, its the most obvious reasons), and i am friends with his ex, but she is dating someone else. so i feel its the perfect time to date and sh*t. so i want to take things a day at a time, ya know get to know each other as budddies then date. I know he doesnt like anyone else, and beleive me hes set on me. so he hasnt asked for my number yet. When will he? we know each other for like a week (i know it seems like nothing) but we have a lot, alot of chemistry. and when will he ask me out? thanks
He's clearly throwing the signs at you and guys love confident women. Go on, ask him out for a drink! Don't expect the guy to do all the work.
I think I might need to see a psychologist... or maybe a psychiatrist. I'm not sure what the difference is. But i'll tell you why I feel like this and maybe you can give me a second opinion so I know if i should approach my parents about this:
I think I have a major problem with paranoia.
When I go to my locker at school, i'll get my books out and lock it back, but sometimes i have to go check it three or four times to make sure it's locked even though I know it is.
Everytime i read about a disease or it is talked about, i get scared to death that i have it. I honestly freak out, i research it and even go as far as trying to get tested for it, and it could be anything from brain cancer to hep c. For no reason, i get paranoid that i have it.
I'm constantly scared, for every little reason. And i get paranoid about every little thing.
A psychiatrist is basically a psychologist that has the medical training to dole out the meds and make diagnoses etc. like a psychologist personified.
I'd definitely suggest you approach your parents about this. Togeather you can go to your GP and explain your situation. They can assess the situation and refer you to the appropriate place/person. He'll probably refer you to a psychologist and after their evaluation you can all decide where you want to go from there.
Okay... dating for awhile now. It's a long distance relationship but we travel and visit each other. I'm just worried... I'm not like the people there I'm from a small town and he ... well he isn't. I'm just worried I won't " fit in" ... help!
He's not dating you for who he wants you to be. There's a reason he chose you above all girls. He wants you for you.
A couple months ago, my stomach began growling out of nowhere. I figured I was just hungry, so I kept eating, but even after I ate, my stomach would keep growling.
I had a normal eating schedule every day but ever since then, I've been eating WAY more than I have. My stomach always growls and if it doesn't, then my stomach feels like it's empty. I'm not hungry sometimes but it'll tell me otherwise.
I've been getting a lot more gas since then, too, and it's really embarrassing being around people and being hungry all the time.
Even while I eat, my stomach growls and reacts strongly. It never hurts, it's just always empty or hungry.
I've been a vegetarian (but I eat fish) for 6 years, and nothing has been a problem since a couple weeks ago so I don't think it's the no-meat problem since my body is already used to that.
I'm 16, 5'2", and 105 lbs.
Id recommend a check up with your doctor just to make sure things are okay physically.
I am constantly hungry when i havent exercised in a while so maybe it could be similar? Gie it a go and start up a regular exercise routine.
It could also mean youre deficient in nutrients. So make sure youre getting everything you need from your diet.
Otherwise you could try eating six small meals - little and often - instead of three larger ones. Make sure you have enough protein, fibre and good carbs to keep you fuller for longer.
I used to weight around 55 kilos and now i weight 72!!! I drink alot of alochol so its hard to loose weight with a doctor.
I just need tips on excersing !! and diets, stuff like that. How much calories do I burn if I excersie for how long
I also need tips on eating and such! Thanks heaps =]
Alcohol is packed full of calories. I doubt you'd lose much weight if you continue drinking a lot.
Cardio is best to burn fat. Running, swimming, aerobics etc. anything that raises the heart rate. Doing 1-2 hours of cardio 5-6 times a week should shift the weight if you modify your calorie intake.
Perhaps reduce your calorie intake to 1800 per day. Eat your fruit, veg, lean means, seafood and wholegrain veg. Include plenty of fibre too to keep you feeling fuller for longer and do portion control.
How many calories you burn per activity depends on how hard you work. If you want to keep track you can join a gym.
But we all know whats healthy and whats not. just eat better and smaller meals more often, up the cardio intake and lower the alcohol consumption. It really is that simple.
you answered my question about my parents not letting me date but there is one more problem with that, im brown and if my parents did let me date they want me to date brown people and this guy that i like, he is white and my parents wont like that, what should i do?
You should be honest with them. Tell them that you dont intend to marry him. All you want to do is get to know him. Simple as that. Dont mention anything about dating or him potentially being your boyfriend. If they get to know him better then in time they may well change their minds on this occasion and allow you to date him. Otherwise you will have to wait until you are eighteen and legally an adult to make these decisions for yourself without your parents having the final say. Even if you cant date you can still be good friends with him.
I really dont want to get over him and move on.. its not that i cant move on .. i believe that if i try hard, at some point i will. But i dont wanna. He was just an Amazing boyfriend. Like seriously the best any one can ever have. And no one ever cared about me as much as he did. Even when i did not like him, i still couldn't not talk to him. He is just so sweet and.. fun. He was like a bestfriend + boyfriend. Irresistible. I don't know how to explain it. It's confusing. When i cheated on him. I didn't like him. But i told myself.. I am NO WAY gonna let this guy get away! It's like im letting go of the best thing thats ever happened to me. He really was i swear.. :( I Just can't let him go. And i cried my eyes out when i cheated on him. Cause i am not a bad person..i know im not, and i cant believe i hurt this great guy soo much. I tried commiting suacide twice before.. By taking 20 random pills.. i just hated my life after this guy..i know he might not love me now.. But i am not gonna let him go.. :'( i spent the best days of my life with him! And i had become a better person after cheating on him.. i really did change.. But after it, he ddnt seem to give a shit and i got fucked up again. I know everything you are saying is true and it makes perfect sense.. And thank you soo much for your advice.. But please i just wanna know how to get him back! Id do anything possible! :'(
The best thing you can do is talk to him now in a context where your past transgressions dont come into play, a discussion about the here and now, how do you feel, where do we stand, what do you want to do? This is what you BOTH need to decide. Whether you have a future or not. If he means this much to you then by all means go and fight for him.
Even if he does not accept you back as a partner he does not have to refuse you as a friend. He can still be a big part of your life then, and it could even develop into something more. Clear the air and get everything out in the open. Call him up and ask him to meet you and get this all sorted. After everything you both owe it to yourselves.
is it okay to have breast pain after losing virginity?how long does it last?
Unless he was overtly aggressive with your breasts during sex, you should consider going to see your doctor as this doesnt sound normal.
Its normal as you grow for your breasts to feel a little painful and/or tender but if its directly linked to losing your virginity then its better being safe than sorry.
There's this guy i dated and i cheated on him.. its a long story.. he knew i didnt love him and that i stayed with him cause he really loved me and he wanted me to give it a try. i liked his best friend and he knew. but his best friend played me before.. any how so i sort of cheated on him with his best friend.. and another guy.. which was a friend of his too. He loved me a lot so he gave me another chance to be with him.. later on i really loved him.. But he broke up with me like 4 months later cause he got bored. Well now its been 6 months since we broke up and i dont usually see him a lot, but i love him soo much. Then recently now i sent him dirty pics of me.. But i also sent them to his best friend.. me and his best friend always were "that way" together.. but things went wrong and they both found out i had sent them to both.. his best friend ddnt care.. but my ex told me that he was gonna tk me into concideration again but i blew it! i feel horrible now.. these pictures spread everywhere! And my ex kept calling me a whore and stuff :( it feels horrible.. I have no idea what i should do! I just wanna change.. and become a better person and i want my ex to love me again.. i miss him soo much!! He was actually my first serious relationship and i miss him.. he was different and special.. How can i get him back after all this that ive done to him??
You've made your bed. Now you have to lie in it. It was good of him to give you another chance the first time around but the second time is a deal breaker. You clearly hurt him and it seems hes tired of being hurt and made a fool of. If you love him like you say then what are you doing sending his best friend graphic images of yourself, regardless of your past with him?
I'd be surprised if he took you back. even if he did would he completely trust you again? Im sure there'd be arguments because of it. You can approach him and have a serious conversation with him. See where he stands on the matter. Maybe he'll give you another chance. Otherwise start moving on.
Its great that youve seen the error of your ways and are trying to change but maybe you should just let your ex be in peace and move onto someone else and start a fresh, slate-wiped-clean, honest relationship.
18/f
I'm really into this guy I've been talking to for awhile and I want to have sex with him, he's the perfect guy and he's so sweet. He wants to have sex with me too we just haven't picked a time to hangout yet. I'm ready so please no lectures about "finding the right guy". I haven't told him that I'm a virgin, I'm guessing he thinks I'm not because he knows that my last relationship was a year and a half long and probably figures I had sex with my exboyfriend. He's not a virgin. I'm really nervous about what it'll be like, so I have a couple questions: Did it hurt/what'd it feel like? Can you compare it to putting in a tampon? I wear tampons. And should I tell him that I'm a virgin? I don't want him to go like super hard on me because he thinks I'm not.
It differs from girl to girl. For many it hurts - with varying degrees of pain - and for others they dont feel anything at all or a slight discomfort. Remember you're stretching your hymen and it may take a few times until your body finally feels comfortable accomodating something as large as a penis. Tampons are significantly smaller therefore they prove painless upon insertion unless youre significantly tight.
Some girls bleed as well (reiterating the stretching of your hymen) from a little to a little more than a little.
Its also very common that first timers dont feel pleasure from penetration and this can take many attempts and experimentation to achieve this.
I think it would be best to be honest so that he knows to be slow and gentle.
Regardless of the obstacles, theres much you can do to make it as problem and pain free as possible. Arousal is key in preparation for penetration as the more aroused you are the better your cervix lifts making more room for a penis. Your vagina can also stretch if it needs to. So spend plenty of time on foreplay.
Use a lot of lubrication and go slowly. Stop if it hurts too much and take your time. Missionary position is good because you are just relaxing while he does the work and it will prevent you from tensing up as much. Or perhaps being ontop so you have full control of how far he goes into you, the speed at which youre going etc.
So just relax and experiment, try to enjoy it as much as possible. And remember to use protection!
well, there's this guy that i like but i dont know if he likes me the same way. we are good friends and have been for a couple years, we sit at different tables in the classroom but everytime i look at him he is staring at me, in this very cute romantic sexy way,atleast to me. is this because he likes me? what should i do, i get nervous and start to feel awkward around him but i REALLY do like him. please answer :(
Make a move! Ask him out for a drink. Guys really do love confidence in a girl so just go for it!
ok please read and help me out i am an emotional wreck
ok so my ex bf broke up with me in may of 2009 because of his parents were criticizing us. i guess he basically let them choose for him. we were together for 2 years. he is just as much a part of my life still as he was when we were together surprisingly. it was very hard to still remain friends i pushed my self to overcome that great struggle. i am confused wether or not how i really feel about him. for almost a year i tried so many ways to get back with him with little success. little things happend between us but i just dont see it as a big deal anymore because i dont know if it really means anything at all. i feel like im not getting anywhere with him kind of like im going in circles. he is not very good to me. he hurts me he calls my names in front of people. but then i just feel the urge to hang out with him. then yet he flirts with me when were alone and acts like he has feelings for me. last year i stopped trying to get back with him and im just going with the flow. i am open to other boys to i actually want someone that would be better. that would treat me good and with respect. but i still am open for him to ever come back. but the problem is now is that he might move to far to where i will barely ever get to see him mabye only once or twice a week. i am upset by this i feel like he doesnt care either. but im not getting anywhere with him anyways like i said its always the same pattern he hurts me he flirts then back to the same mean thing. i am not sure. should i let go ? i know i deserve better because he wasnt very good to me even when we were together but we had our good moments. is he worth my time and what should i think about this. i am also afraid that i might never find someone else. please help me
You have just answered your own question. The only thing keeping you from completely letting him go is your past feelings for him.
You can still be friends with him if you'd like but you know he doesnt treat you well and seems to be playing some game with you. It's not right. And if he cared for you as much as you want him to then he would have tried to make amends a long time ago. Instead, it is you doing all of the work!
You can do better and there definitely are guys out there who will treat you better. There's plenty more fish in the sea and im sure you'll have a few partners before you find the one you really want to settle down with and make a life with as one united unit. Have fun with the guys youre gonna be with and dont waste your time and emotions on people who make you feel like nothing.
i've never had a boyfriend or been in a relationship with anyone. but im in grade 10 now and i like this guy and he likes me too,we've known eachother since elementary school and we're close friends and want to take our friendship to the next level, but there is only one problem with this, im not allowed to date and he is. my parents are very strict and will NOT let me date untill university i REALLY like him and he REALLY likes me too but we cannot date unless we go behind my parents backs. i have already talked to them about having a boyfriend but they are set on NO. what should i do, please help me if you can :(
Sneaking behind your parents back is not only going to prove them right in their notion of you not being old or mature enough to date but also brings up a serious trust issue.
I expect that when you approached your parents you have done so in a manner that a kid your age would. Instead approach them as the mature teenager you want them to see you as. Forget anything about boyfriends. Express your feelings is a clear way, let them know that you only want to get to know the boy and that they cannot shield you from heartache and all the other evils of the world forever. Ask them to trust in the way that they've brought you up and ask them to have faith in you in that you can make the right decisions. All you're asking for is a chance.
Perhaps compromise in that you can bring him to the house and have him meet your parents. Get them involved in your life. Ask that you and this boy spend time with eachother in the company of your parents.
Try to see it from their point of view and ask politely for this chance. Trust is a two way street.
Whatever decision your parents come to you must learn to respect and accept this decision. Being friends with him is better than nothing at all.
Also open up to your parents. Tell them whats going on in your life and speak to them about problems or school or whatever else. The more you include them in your life and are honest with them the more confidence and trust they'll have in you.
We all go through these things with our parents. It's how you handle them that counts.
I am a 16 year old girl. A guy I met 4 or 5 days ago recently told me he likes me. We have been texting and talking alot. He's really nice, but kind of odd. He's less mature than I am , but really easy to talk to. I don't know whether or not I should tell him I like him also and give it a try or if we should just remain friends.
You've only met him four or five days ago. Don't make a decision based upon first impressions. Dont give him a yes or no answer as to whether you like him or not. There's only one way to know that. Get to know him! Go out and spend some time with each other. See where that goes and how your feelings towards him evolve. You'll soon know whether you like him romantically or as a friend. You already seem to like his personality so give it a shot. It's the whole reason of dating!
I don't think it is okay for my girlfriend to shake her booty in front of other men for money at the club? I think it is disrespectful and degrading. Am I wrong?
Have you talked to your girlfriend about this, does she even know you have an issue with what she does? Your feelings are perfectly valid. Express them to your partner. Can you reach a compromise?
At the end of the day she's old enough to make her own decisions. If it bothers you so much and she continues to pursue this line of work after talking to eachother about it then maybe it's time to move onto someone who has the same sort of values as you do. Perhaps she's willing to leave the strip club for the sake of your relationship. Or you could respect her decision but come up with boundaries togeather about how she does her job. Or maybe you could go down with her and experience it for yourself. You never know.
Communication and trust is at the heart of all relationships. You both need to see where you stand on this and decide from there what you want to do.
hey im 19 years old and go to college. ever since my semester at school started ive been so busy studying and trying to do the best i can. I also work too only part time though. But I need to make money so I'm working overtime to buy a car. It seems like every day I have no time for myself and I've noticed I haven't been able to hang out with my friends because I either had too much homework or had to work. It really stresses me out. I haven't had fun in awhile. I don't even have time to write this to you but I really need some help. I never procrastinate for homework it's just when I'm done with 1 assignment I have so much other homework I have to finish in my other classes it's ridiculous. I'm starting to lack in my appearance because I have no time to get ready in the morning and I skip showers because I have to finish my homework. I also stay up really late to finish my homework and study it sucks! My boyfriend wanted to talk to me on the phone tonight but I was so focused on doing a quiz online I didn't have time for him. I also want to do good in school because college is important and I need to make money to buy a new car. It's just hard...I am really stressed and need someone to help I know there's nothing to do really. But I'm getting really tired and have no time to rest, eat, take care of myself or anything and I'm taking a full load of classes. UGH please help if you understand! I can't just take a day off from school or I'll be behind. I could take a few days off work but I need to get a car soon I'm desperate for that. HELP!
Unfortunately every student goes through this and the simple answer is that you cant avoid the crazy hours of cramming and studying. Its just something that you have to do. However there are things you can do to try to organise the way you do things.
Perhaps give yourself a daily routine of waking up early and having a ten minute shower. Some mousse and hairspray, a simple outfit. You dont have to spend hours on make up or dress - you dont have the time to - so just keep it simple.
Most of your day seems to be spent studying so why not invite friends over and have a study group? Give eachother advice on different subjects or ask for an opinion. You can do what needs to be done as well as spending time with people important to you.
Get your priorities straight. Is it absolutely essential that you get a car right now? Take an extra day off from work and use that time to catch up with friends, family etc. Youre burning the candle at both ends. The end result is you giving out and your studies and/or relationships suffering because of it.
Take a look at your life right now and see where you can make some improvements, decide on what you NEED to be doing and what you could possible do without. Theres not much chance of a balanced school and social life right now but i'm sure there are things you could do to make things that little bit less stressful.
i have missed my period for the past couple months, but have never been sexually active. no blood is coming but for about a week or so each month i get this brown stuff that smells on my underwear. is this my period or something else?? please help and thank you :)
It's normal as you're growing to have irregular periods every so often. As you grow older they'll likely regulate. However, if its a continual thing over a significant period of time and you havent had any irregular periods in the past then it would be worth a visit to your gynaecologist just to make sure everything is alright and working well. It's always better to be safe than sorry.
Usually brown discharge is a result of old blood - which seems especially likely being a little late - and it's just your body cleaning out your vagina, so to speak.
Just keep an eye on it and wear cotton underwear that's not too tight fitting and let's your body breathe as well as using ph balanced sensitive, non perfumed shower gel. You should be okay.
14/ f
So, I've been through a lot. Ive been abused by my step mom, i haven seen my real momsince my 7th birthday (court order) because she has schitzofrania, and i was raped by my bioligical mothers boyfriend from age 4-7. Now i see a sycologist, but i feel no change. I feel worthless and horrible, and i feel any guy can take advantage of me because i already feel dirty because i was raped.
& i have no idea how to fix this.
I am still a virgin but i have done everything else, because i feel as if i was taken advantage of already so it doesn't matter anymore. Which sounds like an excuse but i dont know how to totally explain it. Can someone help me think of a way to stay away from guys and just hang out with my friends that are girls and be happy like a normal teenager? and where i can get my focus back onto school?
I think you need to open up more to the professionals around you. Don't keep everything bottled up inside of you. Let them hear every thought in your head. And when they say something you think should be otherwise then dont be afraid to speak out. The more you open upto them the more they can help you.
You also need to learn how to interact with males again. They are a part of everyday life. Not to mention this shouldn't prohibit you from ever having a future relationship with a man. You need to learn from experience that there are many bad apples and evils in this world but that sometimes, some men are actually worth taking that leap of faith for.
YOu need to put in as much effort, if not more, into your own care and progress as possible as well as re-learning how to do handle your feelings, different situations and learning other vital social skills. As you progress you will improve in all areas including focus and motivation which will aid you in getting back into mainstream education and into that normal life you want so badly and rightfully deserve.
Start making goals, working on every and all challenges you face and working out yourself, your past and how to move forward.
Five years ago - at your age - i was in the same space as you. Depressed, suicidal and in an inpatient hospital. I've seen many come back from the worst of human atrocities and have the lives they've dreamed of and I, myself, am my own miracle. Have faith in yourself. You are worth it.
Well this guy is one of those guys that think there cool when there not so he knows I'm going out with her and he keeps saying hot bitch go out with me or ill hurt your bf (me!! Ah) well she told me and said that she will go out with him so I don't get hurt but I said no at the moment no
Me and this guy we hate each other we've had 5 fights all broken up by our group (guys we hang out with) my group was thinking to have a fight 1vs1 every1 gets 1 guy cause I'm 1 of the valuables of the group and gf we set them up with girls and boys,give them advice etc his group is thinking the same thing so there's going to be fight if my gf doasnt go out with him
Should........* gulp*......... let her or not
You're even considering letting your partner go out with a egocentric chauvinist just to stop the both of you getting into fights. You're not exactly winning boyfriend of the year, huh?
Act like an adult and simply ignore him. Encourage your girlfriend to do the mature thing and be firm with him. If his behaviour persists then i strongly suggest you report him to a school guidance counsellor or the police should things get serious.
Otherwise, stay calm, keep above it all and ignore him. He's just simply not worth it.