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If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have better things to do? Is your life so emtpy that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with the authority that you give respect and credence to all who claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think everything you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told you should want?Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masterbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned...

"Contrary to what your mothers and teachers tell you, you are not a beautiful and unique snowflake. You are the same decaying organic matter as everything else. We are all part of the same compost heap."





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Website: http://www.xanga.com/rantsuck
E-mail: pimpstickagostop@yahoo.com
Gender: Male
Location: No one cares
Occupation: Journalist
Age: 22
AIM: shootthefat1
Member Since: February 10, 2005
Answers: 2248
Last Update: December 24, 2005
Visitors: 28843


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Advicenators.com



Ok. My mom just had surgery on her foot yesterday and since then its like everything I do is getting on her nerves. Its like I can't do anything right anymore. And I understand that she is tired and hurting but I have been trying to do all that I can to help her and make her comfy without getting on her nerves but she gets mad at every little thing and she never says thank you or anything when I do something for her. Now its starting to piss me off. I know that she is not her normal self right now and is on pain meds and stuff but its like she has to complain about every little thing and she neverd 'asked' me to do something...she yells at me to do it.
I have been trying to just let it pass but it seems like its just getting worse and worse and I don't know what to do. A little while ago she fell on her foot and I heard her screaming and she never told me to come in there and help her or get her anything she just tried to do it on her own then she ended up blaming it on me....like its my fault that she wanted to get up and didn't want me to help her...I don't what to do...I feel guilty about staying in my room because she might need something but if I stay with her she finds something to yell at me for...
what do I do!!!!????

Stay in your room.


AND DUCKTAPE HER FACE TO THE FLOOR! oh!

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I was bitten by a bug (I'm not quite sure exactly what kind, although I think it was a tick) a couple of nights ago, and my mom thinks that it is infected, and so she wants to take me to the doctor tomorrow to see if it is or not. My question is...
1) How does the doctor tell if it is infected or not?
and
2) What will they do if it is?

I'm kinda worried about it.
Thanks in advance!

The infection will reach your bloodstream and you could die! IM seriouse.

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hi i have a 3 yearold daughter but latly she been out of control she dont listen she is very bossy she wont potty train she hits throws things around gets into everything what can i do to help with all of this everyone is getting mad cuz she is not potty trained yet ive tryed pottys and the adult toliet but nothing works ive tryed soap and spankings and took her toys away but nothing is working can someone help me

liz

Hogtie her to your cieling fan and turn it on high. Shes young and wightless so she'll go good for a couple minutes until the fan breaks.

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Is there a way to stop a pregnant woman from drinking? I don't understand why it's not against the law. It's aginst the law to supply alcohol to minors, but it's ok to posion your unborn child?

Yes.

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Hello,
I live in Texas. I have a 16 yo son who is totally out of control. He has been to boot camp but that didn't help. He is making our family miserable and nothing we do (counseling, etc.) seems to help. We cannot find any help in our town, we are told to deal with him because he is our problem. Does anyone have experience with this?
Thank you so much!

You're a bad parent. Time to get worse.


Hogtie him to your cieling fan and turn it on to high.

Superglue his pecker to a wall when hes drunk and knocked out.

Replace his weed with grass you got from your yard.

Ducktape him to the floor and scream at him.

Send him to an insane asylum saying he tried to kill you.

Move out when hes out at a party or Gangbang.

Take a crap in his mouth while hes sleeping.

Throw dog shit in his pants while hes sleeping and when he wakes up, point and laugh yelling 'AHAAHAHA BED SHITTER!'

Replace his drugs, if hes on ex. With a laxative pill.

Superglue his eyes shut when hes sleepling.

If you need anymore ideas, im still waiting for your feedback.

P.S. Your son is psycho. You're psycho for not doing something about him.

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My daughter is 15 months old. She's off her bottle now, but I can't seem to get her off of her pacifier. Does anyone have ideas to get her off her pacifier?

I wouldn't mind her keeping it, except that it is starting to pull her teeth forward.

Superglue the pacifier to the ground. When she realises she cant get it. She wont use it anymore.

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As we all know mothers day is tomorrow. Does anyone have any good ideas on what to get mine?? I have no idea plese help! I will rate high for a good answer! THanks!

A cow prod. So when you act up TSSSSS! SMOKIN!

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my friend wants to have sex with this guy and she was too shy so i had to talk to the guy for her. and after a while he started hitting on ME and asked me to one of his parties i thought i might havefun but i thought about my friend. i now kinda want to go but ill feel really bad for my friend and she might never talk to me again. please help me

Well shes shy anyway right? So she doesnt really talk in the first place. GO FOR IT DUDE!!!

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hey, im turning 16 on thursday and im havin a gathering.. with about 30-40 people at my house for a few drinks and wat not.. what are some precautions i can take to ensure its not boring and what can we do all night asides from sitting around drinkin?

Screwing.

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Im a 14 year old girl and last year, my cousin broght his best friend to one of my family pool partys. My cousins a year younger than me, but his friend/neighbor was my age. We talked all night and had a great time. We hung out other times too and became best friends. We've been going out for 9 monthes now but my cousin HATES it! At first he was makin fun of us, but he's been trying to break us up ever since. I'm not trying to take my bf away from my cousin, but my cousin thinks i am. I love my bf soo much and i want to spend as much time with him as i can, but i do let them hang out alone sometimes. My bf is getting kinda pissed at my cuz and he'd rather b with my sometimes, but my cuz is soo pissed and he like treats my bf like shit when hes soo nice to him. My cousin thinks i treat him bad, by going out with his friend and it really upsets me, is there anything i can do? Thanks!

Super glue his feet to the ground.

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does getting your belly button pierced hurt? like be honest im scared if i get it done its gunna hurt really bad! and do you really have to wait 6 months for it to heal..

When its first done. It'll oooze like yellow and pus yellow like a thick lemonade. And you'll gross all the guys out.

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how old do you need to be to be a babysitter?

However old you want!

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I am 13/f, 14 in july, but i took a baby-stting class for 2 days at a saint francis hospital...well now that i have done that, i dont know what to do! i mean theres like nobody i can babysit! anybody know a site that i can go to thats like a teen babysitting line or soemthing haha!?!?

Umm, no! HAHAH!

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I'm babysitting this little boy and he wont listen to me at all. I told him it's time to eat, he wouldnt eat. He also wont go to sleep... I need help before the parents get home because I want to be asked again to babysit for them!

Use brute force.

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I need help in my neighborhood there is a lot of families with little kids and I herd they need babysitters but they don't know that I babysit so how do I let them know

How bout, by telling them you do?

Retarded ape.

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okay im 14/f.

i started babysitting at the beginning of the school year. the lady who hired me said that she needed someone she would be able to rely on. she pays really good money but recently her hours got changed and i'm working 3:30 to 6:00 when usually i only did 3:30 to 5:00. i don't even get to eat with my family. and when i get home all i wanna do is just go to bed.

the kids are fucked up. they get disciplined but their mother just laughs when she yells at them. they're really spoiled and get their way all the time.

the other day i was watching them and i was swinging on this swing. well their dog attacked me for no reason. when i told the mother she said "oh sometimes you just need to hit him" he even ripped my pants! there's a small hole in the pants and there's a HUGE bruise on my leg from where he bit me.

when i got my paycheck their was no money for the pants that the dog ripped. i'm really sick of them and i wanna quit but i don't know how to say it. if the dog bites me again i'll have no problem but what should i do in the mean time? i was thinking of giving her my two weeks notice but chickened out. what do i say?

Kill the dog. Then quit.

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okay ... you see lately my mom has been getting me all these babysitting jobs that i really dont want. i've asked her to stop and she has, but one mother wants my to babysit on a regular basis! she has three kids(2, 4 and 6) and i really cannot handle them. the middle child is pretty good, but the 2 year old cries a lot and the 6 year old is always being mean to the middle one and i cant take it! can someone please help me find a way to tell the mother i cant babysit for her regularly. thanks so much!

Say, no.

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Hi!
I just got hired to plan a 3-year old's birthday party, and am stuck on games. I already have Simon Says and Red Light Green Light. I also want to do a craft. If it helps, the parents have rented a moonbounce for the event. If possible, I would like to have 1 water game that does NOT soak the kids!! Thanks in advance and I rate!!

Have a Glue eating contest. Whomever chugs down the WHOLE first bottle of it wins.

Include glue sticks for added hilarity.

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i have never baby sat for kids before but my neighbour has asked me to help. I really want to do this but the baby is only about 11 months old and i've no idea what to do with it . I'm really scared that it might have a cot death, or that i might drop it. Any tips?

Dont baby sit.

Also, a baby is not an "it" You sick being. That "it" is a person under that diaper, you're just too stupid to realise that.

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My 9 year old cousin is coming up tommorrow. Any ideas on how to amuse her for a few hours? I was thinking maybe giving her a little makeover, or something.

Stick her/him in a tub of scolding hot water. Watch his/her red ass haul it outta the tub to the local burned victim facility in town.

Bring a camera so you can get some pics up on the net!

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