E-mail:
grandfather@post.comGender:
MaleLocation:
Lakewood, ColoradoOccupation:
Engineer (retired)Age:
77Member Since:
January 6, 2015Answers:
136Last Update:
April 23, 2017Visitors:
10964Favorite Columnists
Dragonflymagic
Main Categories:
Work/School Relationships
Love Life
Families
View All
about
I do best answering questions that are related to careers, marriage, children, dating and other interpersonal matters.
advice
the nurse told me to start with trigestrel and when its finished i must continue with triphasic so should i still continue taking triphasil because i finished my first pack of trigestril today 8 february and then got my periods yesterday 7 february but the cramps was so severe that i had to go to a chemist and they gave me ponstel which i should take 3 times a day until the pain goes away so i just wanted to know if i should still continue using triphasil birth control pill eventhou im taking ponstel for my period cramps as well
At first, I wasn't going to answer your question, as it's a bit away from the usual topics that I ordinarily give advice on but I just couldn't get it out of my mind.
I realize that some people believe that these drugs are good and harmless but I'm among those who have seen, first hand, the danger that these hormonal birth control drugs pose.
All oral contraceptives pose a risk for painful menses, severe headaches, blood clots, cardiovascular disease and stroke as well as hair loss, osteoporosis, muscle weakness, anxiety and depression.
If you were my granddaughter, I'd advise you not to take any of them. There are other forms of contraception that you can discuss with your nurse.
Every body keeps on call ing me d.u.f.f. like what does it mean and why am I the duff
also is it posible to get pregnant with out haveing sex
Calling someone "The DUFF" comes from the movie of the same name. It's an acronym for "The Designated Ugly Fat Friend" In the movie it's applied to the truly adorable and not at all overweight Mae Whitman and an unnamed but cute, thin guy. http://www.cbsfilms.com/the-duff/
Yes, it's possible for a woman to get pregnant without penetration of the penis into the woman's body in these instances: If a woman or the man touches pre-ejaculate or semen and then touch the vagina, if a man ejaculates near the vagina or if the man's penis contacts the woman's body near her vagina. Of course, the possibility of actually getting pregnant without having sex is very low in these instances, because sperms do not survive very long outside the body and it is very difficult for a sperm to travel through the cervix, the uterus and the Fallopian tubes to meet the egg to get it fertilized.
I am almost turning 14 and everyone else has breasts. It is always awkward changing for P.E. And I look horrible in swimsuits. What do I do?
Dear 13,
Don't fret! You're in good company. Kate Moss, Cameron Diaz, Mila Kunis, Olivia Wilde, Gwyneth Paltrow and the list goes on. You're a member of a committee of very hot ladies who are petite on top and there’s still hope! You may never become a bra buster but your breasts should continue developing until you’re at least 18.
Ok so if you don't play survivlecraft, it's a minecraft clone, and I love it. In a new uptade they added animal aggressiveness. Such basically means that the animals fight each other. Lions fight the horses, as do wolves and bears. So I built a big stable with fence going up 5, and a ceiling. There is no way you can enter unless you open up the gates. And animals can't do that. I always close the gates behind me, but animals always spawn inside and kill several of my horses and donkeys. I had 10 horses and 3 donkeys, now I have 3 horses and 1 donkey all because of this STUPID lion. I am tired of this happening and wanna know how to stop it. I've literally tried everything an I don't know what I am doing wrong, I checked the stables and there are no oppenings. This is always happening. I remember once a bear got in somehow and killed EVERY SINGLE ONE! I thought this uptade would be fun, and it is, but not this. Horses are pretty rare and I need to find a way to protect me.
The iron fence can be used to keep desired animals in and predators out. Camels, Donkeys and Tigers can jump fences, so double fences are required.
19 female
So last weekend, I went to a party with some of my friends and basically ended up making out with one of my guy friends. I don't know how I feel about it...cause like there's kind of a story behind it and maybe even us, but then again it might just be me over reacting. First of all, I've hooked up with guys at parties before, but it's never been with someone I really know or am friends with, so I feel like that just complicates the situation even more.
Basically, last Friday this guy friend (lets call him John) came over to my apartment and invited me and my roommate to a party that he was going to. He came back to our place a little later with alcohol, but I told him before we even went out that I didn't want to get drunk because I had an interview in the morning, but that I'd drink a little with him. We took a couple of shots before we left and then headed out to the party. When we were walking there, two of our other friends were talking about the guys that they were dating or talking to, and me and John were walking together talking about something else. Then he like brought that topic up and asked why I wasn't dating anyone cause I'm a "great catch." I pretty much just laughed that off and changed the topic to something else. When we got to the party, he ended up getting me a lot more drunk than I had planned...not like forcefully or anything but like he gave me the bottle and kept asking if I wanted to take a shot with him. We were spending pretty much the whole time at the party together, and it was pretty normal until he introduced my roommate to a guy he know so they could talk, and basically he and I would be alone. Then he got all huggy which he had been like the whole night but this time it was a little different. Like he brought up how we had been all huggy another time we were drunk a couple weeks before, and how he liked that, even though he hadn't brought it up at all the times I had seen him since. Well after we were hugging for a while we started dancing for like a really long time, and at first it was pretty innocent, but then we got real close. I don't know why but I kissed his neck, and then we started making out. But it was actually really short and when it was over he kissed me on my nose lol which was kind of sweet I guess. And then we parted ways and it was really awkward cause like all of our mutual friends saw, and same with all of the people at the party who I didn't really know but were friends with him. Like when we were dancing this one guy came up to John and was y'all are so fucking cute.
He left with me and my roommate, but I didn't get a chance to talk to him before I left for my apartment and he went back to his dorm. I still haven't seen him yet, and most of me just really wants to avoid him. But then another part of me wants to know what the heck is up? We've always kind of had some type of little connection, and like he's gotten in the way of me talking to another guy before, but I always thought it was more of just a friendship type of thing. I don't know if that was just us being drunk or if there actually might be something there? Ugh, really don't know how I feel about this... Any advice or input?
Sorry this is so long!!
Dear 19 female,
So, you like John and John likes you. You're friends right? However, you're together at a party, you're both drinking and have become rather mellow and both of you are experiencing your normal inhibitions (and good sense) dampened by the numbing affect of the alcohol and your perfect friendship seems to have morphed into something more and you're not comfortable with it.
I believe you can safely relax a bit. I'm sure that John is experiencing some level of discomfort too. It's very possible for friendships to turn romantic. It happens all the time. On the other hand it could have just been the drinks and the moment.
My advice to you is to just wait and see. It was John that created the whole scene and it was John that made the "great catch" comment. Let him carry the ball going forward. If there's anything to this, it will surely become evident in the course of time.
You should also carefully meditate on the possibilities in the cold, harsh light of day. Your feelings are equally as important as John's in this matter.
Good luck to ya' Personally, I'm hoping that there's something too this. I'd love to know how this tuns out.
I probably will tell someone, but then people will tease me for being afraid of a girl and backing out of a fight. But i guess that would be better than getting beat up again. but One of her friends told me today that she's just messing with me because she knows I'm scared of her after what happened already and she won't beat me up at least not on school grounds because she could get kicked off her gymnastics team. Thanks for the advice. It's a really weird feeling being scared of a girl. Never thought a girl could be that tough, but she is really athletic probably more than me. Some kids are already starting to ask me if she beat me up last weekend. Hopefully it just blows over.
Well, OK son. We all have to do what we think is best.
Hey sorry there wasn't really a category for what I need help with right now :(so I was caught masturbating by my dad tonight, but it was on omegle. I explained to him what it was and I didn't show anyone anything, but he's not sure if he's going to tell my mom or not, and it would be sooo embarrassing if he did. They're probably take all my electronics away! He's now acting really suspicious and mad at me, but he just says he's "really concerned" I don't know what to do and I'm really close to freaking out right now, I need advice quick. Please help me!
To punish you merely for masturbating would be wrong. Almost everyone has masturbated and that probably includes your dad and your mom.
However, punishing you for masturbating on Omegle is another matter. Your act may have already made you an involuntary porn star and you'll never earn a nickel from the cretins who will take your video and post it all over the internet on numerous porn sites such as XVideos, Pornhub and XHamster.
You should realize that everything you post online is there forever and is available to absolutely anyone for whatever purpose they decide to use it for. If you don't believe me, just Google "masturbating on Omegle."
My advice to you, is to approach your dad in a very contrite manner and candidly confess that you realize that you done something very wrong and that you understand and appreciate his concern. Tell him you're very sorry and if he will accept your apology and keep the matter between the two of you, you will solemnly swear never to misuse your electronics again.
I'm tired of being mean to the person I like. It's always me calling them names and calling them ugly when I. don't. mean. it. It makes me mad because impulse control disorder makes me blurt out some mean things some times without even thinking. I want to be nice, I really do. But I just don't know how...
any suggestions as how to improve myself in being nice? Because I want to better myself, for the sake of the person I like, for our friendship in general, and for my sake.
Dear Had enough,
I believe that you are a nice person but that you are sometimes prone to the very human failure of saying and perhaps doing things before giving thought to the consequences. However, as you now plainly admit your fault and are expressing the desire to change for the better, I'll forgo the usual punishment of 20 lashes with a wet noodle.
I come from a time before every behavior was labeled as a "disorder" or "syndrome" and people weren't force fed mind altering drugs as methods of management. Self control was something people learned and then practiced as they made their way in the world. No one is born with this ability, people learn from experience what works and what doesn't. Some learn early, others take a little longer. A few never get it. It's not easy!
My advice to you is to get a strong rubber band and place it on your wrist. Every time you fail to maintain control and blurt out something mean, give you wrist a good sharp snap to remind you of the unnecessary pain that you are inflicting. Also, I want you to keep a private journal where you will enter the details of your every failure and also make note of the times when you were able to overcome your interpersonal shortcomings. It won't be long before you truly become the captain of your own vessel.
Best wishes! I believe that you'll make it through this, sooner rather than later.
Hi im a boy in the 7th grade and I recently went to a playground over the weekend thats just outside the county where i live and witnessed a girl who goes to my school beating up a boy really bad for whatever reason I don't know. He wasn't anyone I knew he probably went to the school in that area. Anyway she finally let him go and he was limping and crying as he went by me and the girl and her friend were laughing at him and saw me standing there in shock and her friend said something"Tina kick his ass too" so she came at me I pushed her away but she was able to punch me in the face and take me down and started To get me in a headlock and punch me some more. Well I was able to get away and on my bike. Now after that I was so scared out of my mind of her and I knew I would see her in school. so today she's been hassling me intimidating me, by coming up behind me at lunch and said "I love making boys cry" and "I won't let u get away next time"
I don't know what to do! I never been afraid of a girl before and im scared and nervous as hell! Im to nervous to tell anybody esp my dad! Not sure how he would react and I don't want to admit to anybody that I'm scared of her, but im definitely scared of her after what I seen her do to the other kid and what she did to me! and another girl who's on her gymnastics team told me she knows im afraid of her now and said she overheard her saying she plans on beating me up after school to get out of practice! Any advice please!
Dear Boy,
I'd be scared too! However, this is a situation that requires action on your part. This girl needs help and other boys need to be protected from her. It's your clear duty to report her to the school authorities ASAP. I would also tell your dad. I'm sure he'll support you.
Should you encounter her again before any action is taken, just ignore her taunts but if she touches you, speak in a loud and determined voice and say "Stop it Now, don't put your hands on me" If she continues the attack, you must not run and you may defend yourself by whatever means are necessary. It might be a good idea to travel with one or two of your friends until the situation is resolved so that if worst comes to worst, you'll have witnesses of her aggression.
My ex and I were in a long distance relationship for around 4 months. Since last 20 days or so he was distant and replied to my messages really late.. Usually after 2-3 days.
So I asked him what was happening... And he said, university was hectic and he said things are getting worse. I even asked him if it's this relationship or something else that was causing the problem. He said it's neither of it. But I realised hes doing this to get out of the relationship
I for some reason did not pursue him. I think my ego came in between and I didn't bother texting him again. He hasn't texted me in over 5 days now. I am moving on and don't feel like texting him. I don't think he even deserves to know that m moving on.I cannot text him first.
And he friends with my best friend and I see him online ( he said he's busy with university). So that's just proof enough that he doesn't want to face the music and tell me that he doesn't want to do this. So my question is Im just wondering why am I so indifferent to this? I mean the urge to text and call him just died so soon.
Is this a bad thing??
Dear Confused,
It's NOT a bad thing and it's NOT your ego. I believe that your intuition and keen insight in interpreting his responses are correct and that your action (or lack thereof) are entirely appropriate.
I also don't see anything, in what you write, that's negative or "indifferent" Only a state of mild annoyance at this failure to be candid with you, combined with a realistic appraisal of the situation.
I'm sure, that in going forward, you'll maintain a positive attitude and will not do, say or write anything bad to/about him. It's just time to move on!
Thank you for your advice to my question concerning my credit cards. I appreciate it.
Thank you mother. You've been dealt a rough hand but as Kenny Rogers' sang, "Every hand's a winner and every hand's a loser." It all comes down to how you play your cards.
From the clear and concise way that you expressed your question, I've every confidence that you will overcome every one of these roadblocks.
Best wishes, with hopes of success in all you do...Grandfather.
Hi! i'm a girl and i'm having my Sweet 16 party in several weeks, and i'm starting to send out invitations. most of my friends are girls, but i have a few close guy friends as well. my question is this, should i invite those guy friends even though there will be mostly girls at the party?
i feel like it would be awkward because there would be about 15 girls (maybe) and about 5 or 6 guys. i have more guy friends that i could invite but some of them i don't know all that well. what do you think?
thanks! :)
How fun! Your party will be a blast if you invite ALL of your friends but only your real friends. Choose your guests carefully. It can make or break your party. You don't want a fight at your Sweet 16. If you sense a possible conflict, don't be afraid to politely ask them to play nice or just ignore one another, as this is your special day and you don't want any problems.
My friend brags and lies about everything.she acts like I can't tell it's a lie. She also knows nothing about me our friendship is basically all about her. For examples: she tells that every boy in her classes keep staring at her. That 25 boys have asked her out but she rejected them all. She goes like I'm so pretty. She also makes me tell her she's pretty. I know a lot about Her but she barely knows a thing about me. When she has a problem let's talk but when its me no time. What do I do? I already confronted her once and it was only better for a week before she got worse than before.
It's never going to get better. Without putting a name to your friend, she is someone who lives off the energy of others and if you continue to allow it, you'll become so manipulated that you'll start questioning your own sanity.
Help me decide what to do. I have no assets except a beat up van. I’m renting to own a rundown house that needs over $30K in work- new roof, new plumbing, new flooring (seriously the floors are currently particle board and luan). I have two girls, 14 and 13. I have over $24K in credit card debt from my divorce/ ex-husband. The payment on this debt is $600 a month. Although I only make $2000 a month, I worked very hard for two years to build my credit so that I could buy this beat up house. My plan was to take out a home equity loan to pay off my credit card and fix up my house. Everything was lined up and I was going to close on my house. Then my plant closed and I am out of a job so I’m out of a job and can’t a loan.
My question is should I keep paying my credit card bill even though I’ll never be able to get another house loan for at least two years? Right now we can afford anything. No field trips, no new clothes, no school annuals, no cable or cell phones. We have nothing. My thoughts right now are to stop paying the credit card bills and get a nice apartment. I want my girls to at least have a few nice things while they are in high school. They only have a few years school left. Right now, they can’t even have a sleep over because the house is so run down. At least if I use that extra $600 a month I don’t pay towards credit card bills, they can go to a movie, have cell phone, get a school annual, go on field trips… do the things normal kids do. When they are grown and out of the house, I can try to rebuild my credit and get a house for my grandchildren. But right now I’m so tired of having nothing and being embarrassed because my girls don’t have anything either. They really don’t. Any words of wisdom?
Dear Mother,
You and your children are in an impossible situation. With no job, your plan to pay off your debt and repair the house is no longer an option.
As a matter of necessity, you should stop making payments on your debt as well as payments on the house and conserve your money for the physical necessities which include securing a livable apartment and paying an attorney to file bankruptcy for you.
This is neither shameful or the end of the world. Bankruptcy is for those in situation such as you find yourself in now. It will provide a new beginning for you and the children which will probably make life much better all around.
I've been hearing it call my name since July. And it sounds like the same male voice each time. In November, I saw a little boy in a white robe and with short jet black hair walking in front of my house, I looked away for just half a second, and when I looked back, he wasn't there. He must have been a spirit, because no person could have disappeared that fast. I had asked the people who were outside if they saw him, and they all looked at me like I was crazy and said no. That's when I began hearing the voice call my name yearningly. And I got the feeling that this spirit wants to become a god. 'Cause that little boy could be like Herne, he was a human who hung himself and became a god by a wizard or something. So this little boy could have been in that same situation. And every time I'd think of hearing that voice, I'd see a man in his 60s in the exact same robe (but obviously in a bigger size) and the exact same shade of jet black hair, but way longer and wavier, and a jet black beard that is very long and triangle-shaped. And I feel voices say 'Raphael' whenever I'd think o that spirit. I don't mean to sound crazy, but this is what I believe. Could this spirit be yearning to be a god?
You're not alone. There are any number of people (past and present) that have experienced hearing or seeing things that other people don't. They include Gandhi, Socrates, Joan of Arc, Freud, Anthony Hopkins, Philip K Dick, John Frusciante, Carlos Santana, Robert Schumann, John Forbes Nash, Zoe Wannamaker, Charles Dickens and many more.
It's possible that you have a special gift or sensitivity or you may be having a spiritual or paranormal experience that you are not able to completely understand. On the other hand, it's also possible that a trauma, a bad life experience or even a health problem could be at the root of this.
As this is a question that Involves matters beyond my personal experience and that I have little more than a general knowledge of, I'd advise you to visit the Hearing Voices Network: http://www.hearing-voices.org/ where you can explore the matter anonymously.
Well I am in relationship since 2011..i told him everything about my past life..he never used to pick ph calls in front of me..he didn't even tell me everything about his life..i tell him even about my family problems but he never tells me about his..he hangs around with gis friends but when I go with my friends everytime he creates an issue and spoils my plans..he keeps saying that he is very possessive about me but I don't understand where his possessiveness goes when we quarrel n part..he never calls me to settle up things..he has an ego problem but do I have to say sorry to patch up everytime!!he has a colleague in his office who likes him..hw likes her pics n gives comments on fb..whereas he blocked me on fb..not only that he blocked me from every social media n messengers..when I got to know about that girl I told him to unfriend her...he did unfriend her..but recently he again befriended her on fb n they both like each other's pics..they might chat also..n they talk to other over ph for hours...other staffs in his office even tease them as couple..is he cheating on me?he shows no special interest in me then what's the point to heat on me!!he could easily break it off with me n go in relationship with her..on the very first month of our relation he said it doesn't matter to him if I am in his life or not coz he needs none..he keeps breaking his oath on my life to drink alcohol n instantly makes issues for his alcohol consumption...i knew that he used to drink even before our relation started..all is friends support me..but now he n his mom are accusing me for his addiction..they are saying that I keep hurting him so he drinks..sometimes I wonder does he really love me?
He is definitely acting in a manner that is not only suspicious, but also uncaring, unloving, and seems to be totally preoccupied with himself and his own affairs.
I do believe he's a cheater and I'm concerned that if you try to maintain a relationship with him, he'll just use and abuse you while causing you pain, frustration and ultimately heartbreak.
You've wasted more than enough of your love and attention on him. It's time to move on. You don't have to create an issue, just become unavailable to his wants and needs and widen your horizons. There's a lot of non-alcoholic, strait shooting guys out there who will appreciate you and would be willing to return your love.
I'm pregnant and 14 weeks gone. Where in michigan can I do an abortion for a cheap price. Thank you
Women and Teens Pregnancy Center, in Pontiac Michigan is an organization designed to help teens and women in an unplanned pregnancy. http://www.womenandteens.org/
My wife and I have been married for 47 years. Admittedly shew has made some good financial decisions over the years but now I am concerned about something very serious. We have approximately 95,000.00 in nth stock amrket. ait goes up and down, most.y down lately. I want it all sold and the money put into the bank where it never goes down. She refuses and I hate confrontation. She will simply not talk about it. I asked her one question that I thought would seal the sell it all deal. "Is there more of a chance of it getting to 100,000 or going to 80,000.00"? we've all seen the crashes and we're to old to go through another one. What do you suggest?
I sympathize with your concern that the stock market may erode your assets but I don't believe that you will be able to convince your wife to put all the money in the bank where its growth is limited by very low interest rates.
However, spreading the assets across a wide range of investments is an effective way to reduce risk and increase potential returns over the long term. Holding a mixture of different types of investments will help cushion your portfolio from downturns, as the value of some investments may go up while the value of others may go down.
Without calling in an expert and paying for their advice, you could approach her with the idea of dividing your assets between bank savings accounts, certificates of deposit, bonds, stock market shares, mutual funds, commodities, (including gold) or even a down payment on a rental property.
Last night, I had a dream that I was walking at school, and some random guy kissed me. I can't exactly remember what he looked like or what his name was, but I didn't recognize him at all. What could this mean? Ever since I had that dream, I've been dying to know who it is. The dream felt so real, and he was a really sweet guy.
It's possible that you were kissed by your "dream lover." Could this be something that's missing in your waking life? If so, the kiss could be a preview of what's in store for you in the near future.
My friend found out I like him and started avoiding me. I told him I understand it is awkward but I still want to be friends. He replied that he 'kinda likes me but rather not do anything about it' and I really matter to him but I have a feeling he is lying so that it does not break my heart. Because I feel he is still kind of avoiding me. Is it wise to tell him I do not think he is being honest? Because it hurts me to think someone is lying to me. It has been a week since I messaged him about it and I do not know if it is too late to ask. Both of us are in high school.
Back way off with this guy. Be friendly and approachable but don't ask him anything. This is a wait and see situation. He may come around and he may not. This is his loss, not yours.
Here's my advice to you, when you next find yourself interested in a guy, it isn't a problem to send signals, spend time with him, talk to him, find out about him but Don’t come on to him or reveal your affectionate feelings in words. Just spend time getting to know him and his interests. He'll get the message, usually sooner rather than later. The ball is now in his court. If he's interested in having a relationship with you, he should be willing to take the risk of revealing his feelings for you.