letmetellyou's advice column

askletmetellyou

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: okay well i basically have a few questions in one. i am growing out my hair and right now i would say i havent gotten it cut since june, and it is pretty long it reaches halfway down my back. it is a natural light brown color with blonde shades in it and i love my color, but my hair has been really dull lately and im getting split ends, and i want a change. but i dont want to dye it or cut it.
so my questions are...
-what can i do to hide split ends or make them better without trimming my hair because every time i go to get it cut they ALWAYS cut off too much and my hair grows slow so i never have it this long.
-what are some good products that i can use to revive it. its been so flat and lifeless lately
-are there any ways to change the color, maybe give it a very light, red tint or something, but as long as it washes out. or does anyone know of that glaze by john Freida and if its any good. like if i bought a red one would it give my hair a red tint?

thanks =)

You need to go and get the split ends cut off.

Just make sure you only want the split ends cut.
But that's the best way to fix your problem.

Q: when chris brown is singing "this christmas," towards the end of each chorus, the choir behind him is singing a line that isn't in the original song. what are they saying?

A joy to be heard.

Q: 20/f.
I have a professor this semester for whom I have great admiration and respect highly. I know him both in the classroom and I work with him outside of class on a research project, and he's also my adviser. While our conversations are friendly, they are cordial and formal. I really enjoy spending time with this professor and I'd like to get to know him more outside of school, as a friend.
I was thinking of asking him out for a cup of coffee, but I don't know how to do this casually, especially since it might be construed as crossing some boundaries. Does anyone know how I could do this? Or have any better ideas?
Any help is much appreciated.
Thanks!

Ask him if he'll help you with a paper or better understand something over a cup of coffee.
Make sure it's a very public place where alot of people go but also quiet enough to get some work done.

Q: ok so everytime a perfectly legitimate guy likes me and i think normally i would probably like him to, after we start talking a lot and he opens up and starts saying we should go out and how much he likes me i start feeling so uncomfortable about him to the point where i dont even want to talk to him anymore cause i feel so uncomfortable... am i too picky?? why do i keep feeling like this everytime im about to go out with a guy i should like?? im 16 btw

You just arn't ready for a relationship and that's ok.

Just wait awhile.

Q: okay so i went on vacation for thanksgiving break and when i came back my friend arial tells me hes glad ur back. and later on my other friend vacity tells me that at lunch he was hangin with other girls and that if i still like him and he may break up with me!and i noe him and i thought well maybe shes lieing,then vacity says want me to tell him its over i was like no i still have no evidence and later i call her to tell her that im going to talk to him and she says no,cuz then he'll sprend rumors.and so i tell her so hes gonna breakup wit me,but arial just told me that he said im glad im back and vacity says no she just wants you to stay together and so i dont know what to do i mean who do i belive oh and later he calls me and we just talk as usually and i guess it made me feel a bit better. so i NEED ADVICE LIKE A.S.A.P PLEASE ADVICE ERGENT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hold up
So one girl wants you to stay with your boyfriend but didn't elaborate on what he was doing while you were gone.
The other one says that he was flirting with other girls the whole time you were on vacation.

Well this is just like that show on MTV The Hills.

You should first of all talk to your boyfriend because he would know the best what he was doing.
If you have been going out with him for a long time and trust him ALOT then you should believe him.

Talk to both of your friends... at the same time. See what they have to say.
Who have you been friends with longer and who is more loyal. Who has never told your secrets that you tell them which one would give you 5 dollars for a football ticket. And which one would stab you in the back in a heartbeat.

But if you don't trust your boyfriend then you don't need to be going out with him.

Ask yourself
Did he call you during vacation and how often
Before you went out with him was he a playa and what about after?
How long have you been going out with him.
How much do you really know him
Did you know alot about him before you were going out with him?

Q: ok another question about the lg rumor.. i guess all T-Mobile phones use sim cards? so that's what i have. i know that the rumor doesnt use sim cards, so i was planning to buy one from ebay that i found, but would i even be able to use it if it doesnt take sim cards? im super confused about this. is there anyway to get my number and all the information on that phone once i get it? i cant switch to sprint or verizon or whatever company it is because my contract with t-mobile is up, but i need a new phone and t-mobile's phones always have problems for me. anything i can do?

Call your t-mobile place and ask. Duh

Q: Ok here's the prob. I have a major problem tolerating annoying people. Example people who say they don't like Obama only for the fact he's black. I don't care what there opinion is but if that's the only reason then really it makes me just want to punch them in the throat. And then I have to read this really long book in a group and these two people, all they do is flirt all the time and poke each other. I ended up having to do all the work and really it PISSES me off sooo bad. Please help me before I kick someone's knee caps in.

I know exactly how you feel!!! (about the flirting part and doing all the work in the group)
I have this friend who flirts with everyone even though she has a boyfriend. Pisses me off. So the next time they do it ask them when the due date of their baby is or to get a room.

If they don't do any of the work then neither should you. Just don't do it. Sounds like your a pretty good student and they arn't so if it isn't going to hurt your grade then don't do it. They'll suffer. Or you could just go and tell the teacher.

When you feel like this you should walk away or take deep breaths.

Q: I have applied for college and was waiting for my results. I got an email stating that I have not recieved my ontario secondary school diploma and that i am not eligible for one. The thing is i have my ossd and on my transcript it says i only have 28 credit but i need 30. Two of the coarses I took were repeat coarses and on my transcript it says R (repeat) instead of a credit. But i still graduated I don't understand. What do I do, I have my OSSD but apparently I wasnt even eligible for one???????

Call the school and find out what's going on.
Call your old school first then the one you're applying for.
Goodluck.

Q: How long do you wait before going to the next "base"?

for each one?

Um
Hello!
Who ever said there was a time limit to anything.
It has nothing to do with how many weeks you've been together. It shoudln't be anything like that at all.
Instead it should be how comfortable you feel around your boyfriend or girlfriend. If you really love them or not. Don't base your realationship on time.
It could be days or even years.

Get real.

Q: hi I am a wife and a mother mother of four great kids. I love my family to death but they say that I am onesided and to hard on them. I however dont see that way. I just think i want the best for them. Now mind you 3 of my kids are handicapped and this puts alot of stress on me. it seems at times that I am the only parent in the house. my husband works and I stay home with the kids. I cook,clean,help kids with their things and try to be a loving wife. but when he comes home if feel i need a break and it is his time with them. we do share so household chores. but when it his day to do something he useally doesnt do or only half way do it. and i feel if you start something you need to finish no matter what. he says that i have to have my way about everything and that i dont care what he feels or how it makes him feel. he also says that I have a way of doing everything and if i see someone doing it diffrent then its wrong. plus he say I have a spot for everything and that the house isnt going to stay clean and I should let it go sometimes and chill.he also state that no matter what he does it doent please me. Now I feel that you should have a clean house and keep it nice but i now its not going to stay clean but if you see something out of place put it away this makes it easier on me.should i chill? i have a very bad temper and we get into fights not hand to hand but yelling matches and sometimes i feel that i am not tiring my best to stop the fights and that im overbearing and out of control what should I do? i feel sometimes that it would be easier to be by myself.

mylife

Everyday when my mom comes home one of the first things I hear is you need to do this or you need to do that or this didn't get done.

My advice isn't a whole lot but just make sure that when he comes home that you greet him in a nice way. Not tell him what needs to be done and not exaggerate on what you had to do all day because he had to do some hard stuff himself I'm sure. Don't say I had to do this and this and this and this and this and this.. My mom does it and it's like "Ok... I get it already!"

When he comes home give him a few minutes to him for himself and then go and ask him if he can help you or if he can help the kids with something while you take a breather.

Goodluck

Oh and when you are fighting make sure the kids don't hear. None of us kids should ever have to hear their parents fight.

Q: i now have almost 100k(2k off)and i need help to beat some quest before i come a mem. i am still 55lvl and i need to finsh dragon slyer black nights fortress and sheild of arvrock(me and my sis are doing that together)

And where is the question in this?

If you want to know how to finish the quest go look it up on google.

Q: im 13 years old and hes 14.
omg, ive liked him since last year, to last summer, to this year hahaa. so ive liked him for a while now, hoenslty, ithink im inlove, you might be rolling your eyes, but yeah thatdoesnt really matter right now, well we wer never THAT close to eachother, it was always like HI's and Byes or do you have a pencil? do we have h.w that stuff haha, but now this year me and him are pretty damn close, like in computer class we sit togehter and joke around and we'll go on paint and make fun of eachother, and he'll take my water bottle and like hide it from me and stuff and also when wer in class he'll be like go get me water,NOW!and he'll like be joking[my sis thinks its a way of flirting with me ] haha.
and whenever my sister is like talkin to him he has a straight face, and then when i come my sister notices him smirking and he neve rwants to look at me but ithink its cuase hes shy. but what do you guys think? i know yoiu cant know if he likes me or not but like what do you think about these stuff, im sorry its soo long haha :] htanks in advance kbye: ]

Yes it sounds like he likes you.
But you're only 13. I'd wait for someone better.

Q: is there anyway, besides online surveys that i could make money at home???

No
Go get a real job.
I've already tried.

Q: i get nervous really easily especially when i have to speak in front of a large group of people and i start sweating like crazy on my face hands feet and armpits and a lot of times my face turns red when a few people's attention is on me... and i just feel self consious and uncomfortable in front of a large amount of people... how do i stop this?? is there anything i can do or think of mentally so i stop feeling nervous and shy and start being comfortable and confident instead??? thanks!!

Believe in yourself and always tell yourself it will all be over in a few min.

If it isn't going to affect you in 5 years ... why worry about it?

Q: hey which company has the cheapest cell phone plan that has unlimited txt and 100 or 200 minutes a month????
and i also need a decent flip phone that can txt, and has a camera.....maybe music too......

The pay as you go probably

Q: is there a way on need for speed most wanted to sell parts on your car that u have bought but dont want anymore?

Q: Ugh! SO i recently started like getting facial hair.
& i HATE it.
i feel so ugly :(

I know you can wax it and bleach and stuff,
but like does any one know how to like stop it from growing as fast or as much?

Thanks

Usually you can go to where you get your nails done and get it waxed for like 15 dollars or less.
Easy.

Q: 14/f-I really like this guy, his name is Ruben, and I have liked him since the beginning of the school year. He is really a great guy, but we don't get to talk much, and I really want to ask him out, but I am not sure how. And on top of that, I think he has a gf. Plus, I don't think he likes me because of how quiet he is around me. Idk though because when he is around his friends, he is almost as quiet as he is around me. I think that we would be great together, but I am not sure why I just can't seem to get close to him. When we hang out, I just freeze up, not like what I usually do around my guy friends, but just like freeze up and can't seem to find the right conversation and words to say. He is one of the sweetest guys I know and he is beyond cute. Should I ask him out or just stay from afar until I figure out how he feels(which may be impossible because one of my other friends has known Ruben since like 2nd grade and he still cant figure the guy out)? Should I talk to him and like try to get closer to him? I really don't know what to do! T_T

You never know if you don't try.

Just remember that if you don't feel comfortable around him now when your dating this might not change but become more akward and if you arn't finding enough time right now to talk to him chances are you won't when your going out either.

Ask around and see if he has a girlfriend. Find some way to get him talking.

I'd wait for awhile to see what happeneds but I would deffienly try to talk to him.

Remember you're only 14.

Q: Things between my mother and I have been not so great for the entirety of my life. However, lately things have gotten extremely bad. At the start of summer I moved out, and when i moved back in things seemed a little better, because she knew I meant business and could leave. Then things were better for a while, but lately she's gone back to verbally abusing me, getting trashed every night and going on these upsetting tangents, so the other night I tried to commit suicide. I was rushed to the hospital and had my stomach pumped and am now staying with a friend. What should I do? I feel like i cannot go back, but now i won't have my car because my mom owns it, my jobs are all back where I live, and I don't know what to do. Help.

First off I hope you are doing well.
Trying to take your life won't solve anything.
Things will get better.

You need to move back in with your mom obviously. You have no other choice.
She seems to need you more than you know it. Think about her life for just a minute. Everyone is going through something.

Tell her how you really feel about her drinking and verbally abusing you. You need to have a one on one converstation no matter how hard that may be.

Save your money. As soon as you can get out of there. Don't go shopping don't go to the movies. Put your money in the bank and save for an apartment. Keep your eye out for a roomate to share rent with possibly.

You can make it through this.
Try not to spend alot of time at home. Take on more hours at work or school or find some friends to hang out with.

Goodluck. I will pray for you.

Q: so me and my ex have been on and off for a year.
It's been a pattern he would stop talking to me for 2 weeks (i wouldn't call text or anything!) and then he'd text me non stop begging for me back. I just don't understand he says he loves me but he always leaves me and does the single thing because he loves girls, he loves flirting, he just loves all the attention. He's never cheated on me though he's just sooo honest it hurts which is just as bad. He said he likes it but he LOVES being with me. But this last time was different we lasted with no break ups nor fights for 1 month and 1 week lol sounds pretty sad but i was happy about it. Well now he's back do doing his own thing but I'll know he will be back. . .i juts wanna know why he does this and how can i get over him I'm tired of crying all the time it hurts so bad. At first when he text me to get me back I'm the biggest hardass and i'll blow him off but he keeps on and on begging for me and he says the sweetest stuff and that it will be different. . .and even though i know it won't i cling to that hope and try it again. everytime he thinks he's going to really going to lose me he won't leave me alone. . .someone please help me

-bounded by a player*

Ok first off. Hello?! He's a pig!
Lets list all the negative things first
1. He flirts with other girls
2. You've already broken up with him more than 3 times.
3. He's a player
4. He an attention seeker.
5. He doesn't text or talk to you for 2 weeks
6. Your glad because you haven't fought for a simple month and a week. (Not very long considering you've been on and off for about a year.)
7. He makes you an emotional wreck.
8. He's simply a jerk who really doesn't care about girls feelings.

Here's the good things
1. When your together everything is ok... for about what .. A week
2. He always comes crawling back with nice messages and stuff.
3. He says he "loves" you (but if he really loved you would he be putting you through this and leaving you so often) Didn't think so.
4. He says things will be differnt, to bad actions speak louder than words and from his previous actions we can predict the future... it's not a good on btw.

So all in all I'd say that you should break up with him.
He seems like a total jerk that doesn't know what he wants except a girl that he really doesn't care about to much and when he gets tired of her he moves on to the next one.
Dump him for good. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.