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I hope that if you come to this site, you feel at least some reassurance. Life is messy, life isn't perfect, and I love that there is a place, virtual as it is that can acknowledge this. I don't pretend to be perfect or know everything, but I promise that if you ask me a question, or if I see one and take an interest, I will answer it as best I can.Check out my forum here:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=41589
to post/comment on a topic =]
advice
Does anyone know where i can watch Beverly Hills 90210 (especially the pilot) online for free?? I've checked youtube and i've tried googling it, but i couldn't find it.
Thanks so much!!
www.alluc.org
www.flickpeek.com
These are two sites that I would recommend for watching anything (tv shows, movies) online.
Is this equation correct?
H2SO4 + Al(OH3 -> HOH + Al2(SO4)3
Basically you count the atoms of, say, hydrogen on one side, and compare that number with the amount of hydrogens on the other side. If there are the same number of hydrogen, hydrogen on both sides is balanced. To balance an equation, you would do the same with each atom. When you find something that doesn't match up, you can change the amount of molecules.
For example, on the left side there is one Al. On the right there are two. To balance, add a two in front of Al(OH)3, to make it 2Al(OH)3. Now there are 2 Al, 6 O, and 6 H things on that side. Which means that you have to go to the other side and balance them out.
This is gonna be tricky the first few times, but eventually you'll get the hang of it, if you do enough problems.
As a side note, HOH turns into H2O in reactions. Basically, if doubly displacement yields any combo of Hs and Os, it turns into water.
My Question Is simply that recently, like every time I see my boyfriend, he ends up sexually pleasuring me in some way (not all the way, an empty house doesn't normally present itself as often as we'd like). I keep thinking - why would he do that? he says he likes doing it and that it feels good, but I seriously doubt him in this sense. Sure he keeps doing it, but it something that I don't need and I've never been very bothered about - it just so happens, he's very persistent in doing it and also pretty damn good so I never decline his offer. Sometimes he doesn't even ask for anything back and says he'd prefer I didn't today... but last time he did it, after about quarter of an hour he said that's enough for you and I thought that's fine, but it made me think that he feels in some way pressured to do it. Also, I get embarassed when he comments on the fact I get 'wet' - are boys grossed out by this? I mean its natural and all but I was just wondering if they think it's a bad thing.
That was all a bit muddled, so I'll summarise my questions.
- Is it strange for him to do it so much and not ask for anything back?
- Could he actually be enjoying it as much as he says he does?
- Does 'wetness' gross boys out?
Also, I have Scoliosis. That means my spine is an s shape, although mine is very mild. Basically, I'm not worried about him seeing my spine, but I am worried because it causes one of my hips to be further up than the other and I am curved on one side like a normal woman - but on the other side i am alot straighter, there's almost no curve. It's not too noticeable unless your me, but he has seen it. I'm a bit lopsided in this sense, and not even on both sides. Will this effect a way he'll look at me?
We've been sexually active for a few months now, I was just wondering nowbecause it's been a niggling fear - I've always been a 'good girl' and I waited a year with him before we did anything, but I'm also very self conscious - I was going to ask these questions inevitably at some point.
Thank you VERY MUCH advicenators!
^_^
F
I seriously doubt that there is some suspicious reason for why he enjoys pleasing you more than he *apparently* enjoys getting his own dose of pleasure. If there is a reason, it's probably something like he feels uncomfortable with his own body, or getting "pleased" in that way. You should probably talk to him about this, the fact that, for whatever reason, he's doing more for you sexually that it seems that you do for him (and, while you're at it, all the other questions you just asked). Having a discussion with him is probably more helpful than any of us guessing what is going through his head.
One thing I found interesting was how you seem to be uncomfortable at the idea of yourself being turned on. Perhaps he feels the same way? It is okay if you don't feel comfortable being sexually active yet. Remember, though, that having sex does not make you a "bad girl." I mean, come on, you've been going out with this guy for over a year, you are being responsible, it really is okay =] Don't feel guilty about getting turned on by your boyfriend. You can still think of yourself as a "good girl", but also remember that you are only human. However, if anything is making you feel the slightest bit uncomfortable, it's okay to tell your boyfriend to tone it down a bit.
As for whether your boyfriend is grossed out by your wetness, only he can really answer that. However, if he's noticing it, it's probably more than he's noticing you turning on than him being repulsed in any way. After a few months, he should probably have realized that there's some correlation between you getting wet and you getting pleasured. And no, if he loves you the scoliosis won't matter at all. He may notice it, but I seriously doubt that something as small as that would cause him to look at you differently.
As for whether he gets pleasure turning you on, of course he does! In relationships (the good ones, at least), it makes the person going about the pleasuring feel good, because they care about the other person and enjoy turning him/her on. In terms of how this all relates back to your boyfriend, you can safely trust him when he says he enjoys whatever he's doing, otherwise he would not be doing it as much =]
i would like to know if my husband love me or not ?
The way I see it, there are two kinds of love. One is the feeling of love, which anyone can feel to anyone they treat horribly. A guy that abuses his wife may "feel" love in this way. The second is the actions associated with being in love. Anyone can claim to "feel" love, but, for the second type, he would show it. He wouldn't cheat, but would stay committed. He would support you and not ever try to cast you down; he would want the best for you. In my opinion, the only love worth staying with is the second type.
Now, you have not provided enough detail in your question for me to tell whether or not your husband loves you. I don't know you. I don't know your husband. However, if you message me back with some more details, I would be happy to answer your question =]
15/f
Okay so there is this boy lets call him S. Well last year i kinda feel hard for him. And not just infatuation, but love. I had told him once how i felt. We always hung out. And he came to my house once or twice. One night last year i asked S to come to the movies with me, he said "Ill see what I could do" so i was like hes prolly not gonna come but Ill go with my friends anyways. But on my way out of the movie theather I saw him walking in with some other girl lets call her A. Well he looked surprised to see me, but i just walked away and never talked to him until this year. But that night and the next day he called me about five times, although now he tells me that he wasnt guily about nothing, but why would he call me like that? But tonight we were talking and the subject of sex came up, and now he is with A. he was talking about there sex life, and i jut cut him off like i really dont wanna hear about yall. He was like why? its not like anything went on between us. I said Yeah that sucks. Then he focussed on what I had said. He was like what did you mean by that. I said nothing. He was like oh you wanted to do shit like that. I was like naw but I wanted to be more than just friends you know. And he was like I didnt know you liked me like that when i had told him before. I was like yeah, I wouldve done anything for or with you back then I was in love with you, and I hated you for wat you did to me. He was like oh well I think we should have sex. I was like no thats alright, you get it from your girl everynight. He said but its not you. I didnt understand what he meant by that. I mean I still love him, even though I wouldnt let anyone know it. But i wanna know if he likes me or ever did. Like I would have sex with him but like not just come out and say it. Like i wanna tell him to come pick me up by his self cause I got a surprise for him. Do you think Im setting my self up for trouble or what?
Sorry so long, its just Ive been through so much with him lol, theres way more butt this is the important things :] thank you
I'm not really sure what he gleaned from your "yeah that sucks". Maybe he thinks that you feel bad that he's not getting any, so figures you wouldn't then mind giving him some. In any case, I was not there.
However, something that is very clear is that he is confused, and he is using you. When you told him that before, when you loved him, you would have done anything for him - unfortunately this guy is extremely horny, so "anything" translated to "anything with my body" which translated to "sex."
To him, having sex with you would be a bonus, it would be making up for all the times he could have had sex with you. Careful, though. This means exactly what it means. For him it means: "Sweet! Sex with two chicks at once!". It doesn't mean he'll love you. It doesn't mean he'll break up with A. It doesn't mean that he'll start thinking about you "in that way".
Basically, he would have sex from you wanting one thing (a no-strings-attached hook up), and you would be wanting another (you love him). This rarely ends well. You're best bet at a relationship with S would be to tell him, "I'm not comfortable having sex with you if you're still seeing A. I like you, but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with you. Call me back if/when you guys break up."
Otherwise, you will be used, the girlfriend will be hurt if she finds out, and he'll get all the benefits with you without ever loving you or wanting to be with you. Kinda sucks.
Hey! f/15! [:
well i '[think] i like this boy.
i don't really know him much tho.
i know him but i dont -cause he use
to be one of my real good friends; but he
has changed alot since then.
well anyways i see him every weekend' & we flirt [alottt!] but if hes not flirting with me its my bestfriend or another girl. hes all over every other girl; last weekend it was some girl it was a new girl blah & my best friend likes him as well idk its confusing; and i think about him like too much for my own good' i dont wanna start to like him like alot either it's just heppening
it's kinda like my feelsing are takin over my mind? im not sure what this is but he *$&@_*(&@
blah i can't stop thinking about him what should i do? what would you do -xoxo.
Well first of all - take a deep breath. Listen to some music. Calm down a bit.
It's okay to start liking someone you don't want to like - it happens. Sometimes the guy ends up surprising you, sometimes you get disappointed. But eventually, when you can't stop thinking about him, it's like you might as well just go for it, because he's all you're thinking about anyway.
You have a choice here - you either go for it or you back off completely (by that I mean stop being around him). If you try to back off but keep talking to him, you'll end up falling for him inevitably. Pretty much you'd end up like you are now.
Personally I'd say to go for it. It's okay to find yourself going crazy thinking about someone - and pretty normal, actually. Stick around and make it clear to him that YOU LIKE HIM. He could end up with some other girl that he is all over, but you might as well go for it, so that in case that happens, you'll know you gave it your best shot.
17/f
Ok I know instant abs are not possible but a couple of friends are planning on going to the beach on friday and i have a one pack if you know what i mean plus stretch marks on my stomach.. help. It's repulsive and i want to make it as subtle as possible
One thing to always remember is that no one is looking at your stomach as intensely as you have been. They may notice the stretchmarks a little, but I doubt anyone will focus on your stomach - they're all probably worried about their own bodies!
I can't really give you any advice that would magically transform your body by Friday. The best thing you could do now to look your best is to find a nice bathingsuit.
Instead of the traditional bikini you could try a one piece or tankini. By one piece I'm not really referring to a Speedo - try going to a nice bathingsuit store and picking out something maybe with cutouts, or a nice back, well, whatever floats your boat =]. There are some nice ones out there.
Although there is nothing you can do about stretch marks in the water, concealer should work on land. As well, you could always try waterproof nude lipstick =]
Have fun!
let's just say that my current boyfriend's name is Adrian, and my ex's name is kenny.
I'm sooo sorry, this is long.
information: I'll just start this out that me and my current boyfriend, Adrian, has been together for about 10 months. And i had this ex boyfriend, kenny, like about 2 years ago, he's the first guy i had really strong feelings for. like i "fell" for kenny. and me & kenny had a really harsh break up, because after we broke up, he was avoiding me. Kenny, moved to another city, far away. Me and Adrian has on & off, because of alot of drama, and adrian treats me bad at times, that my friends doesn't like him AT ALL. they kept telling me to break up with him ever since our 4th month.
Okay so,
Around mine and Adrian's 10th month was coming up, kenny messaged me out of nowhere, and told me he was sorry and all that stuff for hurting me and blah. so i messaged him back saying that he was late, but it was okay.. and that it's okay that we're friends. because he said he wanted to start over. and later on, kenny aims me and tells me that the girlfriend's he had after me, which was a year ago, and was only two girls. he said that he didn't really like them, and that when he went out with them, it didn't help him at all, because it made him realize how good of a girlfriend i was before. and i told him that he was REALLY late. and he said "yeah.. i know I'm late", and he told me that he still gotten over me for the past 2 years.. that's why he's been single, and i thought he was just kidding about liking me still. so i said "well you're late now.. now I'm getting married soon... JUST KIDDING" and before i said just kidding, he said "no I'm speaking now, I'm not holding my peace". and when he told me he still liked me.. i felt really happy, to hear that kenny liked me for that long. and two days later, we stopped talking to each other.. so i was wondering if he was just saying those stuff, to see how i react. but why would he say all of those things to me? and he's been acting different towards me now since the time he had confessed to me. i was wondering if he was just joking, or he's acting like this because i have a boyfriend. and ever since he messaged me, or i talked to him, i've been confused. I guess I still like kenny, but not as much as I did before, but at least like him enough to want to see him really badly. And me and adrian, as i said, has been having on & off lately, and i KNOW that i can do better, but i just can't leave him, it's either that i like him alot (but i'm not sure about that, because he treats me bad enough), or it's because i'm too attached to him. because maybe i'm scared that i'm going to regret it if i break up with him. Maybe i lost some feelings for Adrian, because he told me he wanted to marry me, i told him not to buy me a ring, when i used to be so sure i wanted to.. but not anymore. Because when he says he wants us to get married, i think about Kenny. And everytime when adrian and I have on & offs, i cry and all.. but then he tells me he didn't mean to break it off, so i get more angry, and i tell him that i HATE it that he says that, and he doesn't mean it. and adrian says "you want me to mean it?" and i always tell him "no.. but only if you'll stop saying that if you don't mean it." but in my head, i'm angry and i always say that if he means it, then why not end it for good? because i'm tired of hearing it all the time, and hear him say that he doesn't mean it. but yet, i feel like i still want to be with him..
HELP ME PLEASE! i don't know what i'm feeling, and i don't know what to do.. PLEASEEE!
It seems like the problem here is more that you are unhappy with Adrian than anything to do with Kenny. If Kenny did not exist, you would still be questioning your relationship with Adrian, am I right?
In all relationships there are crap moments. In good relationships, they don't take over, and the good generally outweighs the bad. If Adrian is the kind of guy that will propose after a short period of time, even while you guys are continually breaking up and getting back together, you have a reason to be suspicious right there. If you KNOW that Adrian treats you badly - not that you are disagreeing, but that he generally treats you badly - that alone is a reason to leave. For months your friends have been telling you that Adrian is wrong for you. You should probably listen to them.
Don't wait for an excuse, for a particularly bad breakup. Don't even let Adrian scare you with the "well maybe I will break it off for good this time" - he is playing with your mind, and you know this. If you know that a face-to-face break up is hard, hell, just call him and then refuse to see him anymore.
But seriously. If all this seems too intense for you, think about this: Adrian has tried to propose to you. Either you end up in a break-up make-up cycle until you drive yourself crazy, or you grit your teeth (because you already know it ain't getting any better) and end it all now.
Do what you need to do about Adrian, and put Kenny on the backburner - take one thing at a time. Once everything - the drama, that being treated the wrong way - has blown over, wait a bit, and then see how you feel about Kenny.
does anyone know where i can find any of the dear ashley clips? [dear ashley, thatsssss me-- with amanda bynes]
www.youtube.com
www.alluc.org
www.flickpeek.com
www.veoh.com
www.dailymotion.com
--general sites that are good for watching tv online
15/f
i have long skinny legs and i hate wearing shorts and skirts but its getting hot so thats all i can wear
so are there anyways to like make my legs look better? please help :]
thanks
Aerobic exercise that targets your legs is usually best. For one, it's easy and cheap to do - you don't need a gym or any expensive equipment. As well, the aerobics are good for slimming down your body in general.
Anything from running to swimming to dancing would work. If you have trouble motivating yourself to do workouts, you could join a club/team to make it more fun and to get you to do something on a more regular, weekly basis.
ok so i had sex for the first time and bled i no thats normal now how long before it stops hurting ? like will it hurt if i have sex a second time?
Female
Whether or not you bleed depends less on the number of times you had sex in the past then how ready your body was.
In order for penetration to happen without tearing anything, you have to go about it properly. By this I mean turned on, your panties completely wet, and relaxed, so nothing down there is tense.
Water-based lubricants are also very helpful. You can buy this at the pharmacy or at a sex shop and it helps the penis to enter your vagina without tears. And always remember to get water based if he is wearing a condom - anything oil-based will cause it to tear.
Likely, the second time you have sex you will both be a little more experienced. Buy some lube, relax, and go slow - this way sex should hurt a lot less.
I was with this guy for like 2 days and then we broke up It has been 5 months and i still like him harder and harder I would so give my virginity to him and I cant stop thinking of him we might/were going to get back together and I was really happy everythime someone tell me something about him I get nervous to if it is going to be bad or good I want to talk about him all the time but I think my friends get tired of it...I dont talk to him much just hi and bye but I heard from a really close friend of both of ours that he likes me I cry for him all the time...I think I love him can this be love...Ps almost eveerthing I do is around him from school to clothes and I dont want to live without him
f/15
Are you in love? This really depends on your idea of love. If you are of the school of mind that you could love someone just by seeing them then yes, possibly you are in love. If you believe that you have to actually know someone to love them, well,you would seem to have more of an intense, intense infatuation.
The truth about liking someone that you don't really know is that it's very easy to fall in love with the idea of them. Think about it. If you don't actually know the person, a lot of your ideas about what this guy is like comes from your own obsessive imagination.
Making up from a break up does happen, but realistically, they would happen sooner than five months later, if at all. It's probably tough for you right now to think about forgetting about him, but you would be so so much happier if you did. Seriously. You could be selfish again! Imagine being able to not cry over him, to make decisions about clothes and school that will ultimately benefit you!
Tell yourself right now that you are obsessing, and do as much as you can to force yourself to have fun and to not think about him. Eat cake. Go watch a movie. Stop talking about him and trying to be around him.
You can't be with someone you idolize. Think of how much happier you'd be not worrying about all this, potentially feeling actual love for a guy who feels the same way about you.
My butt's been bleeding, like, when I wipe and stuff, it's blood, and I check, not from the twat. I know it's not normal, so what does it mean?
You are either suffering from some kind of internal bleeding (pretty serious), or you have a cut on your anus(less serious, less likely). Tell an adult and get it checked out as soon as possible.
is there any like cute teasing things to do to your boyfriend along the lines of kissing?
--Get him turned on by rubbing his back, generally appearing like you are about to kiss him, keeping your lips at a distance away from him. Wait until he goes crazy and or yanks you into him.
--In the middle of kissing, pause to do something totally unrelated. As he is fighting off urges to kiss you, convince him whatever you are doing is too important to kiss him back (ie snuggle close, eating an apple).
-- To kiss him, give him a tiny nip on the lips - so tiny they are barely touching. Pull back for a nanosecond and then go in.
Have fun =]
OK, when ever I spread out my legs I smell a REALY bad smell. and i no that it is the discharge (i think) but how can i make it not be so smelly?
ps i no really gross but help!)
thanks
If you are talking REALLY bad and if your discharge is yellow/you are itchy down there, you should get yourself checked out.
If it's just normal "down there" smell - all girls have a different scent of some sort in that area - there is nothing you can do to "smell better" without harming your body.
Anything perfume-like your put in your vagina has chemicals, and these interact with the existing chemical environment that keeps you healthy (ie. DON"T DO IT!).
A good alternative is washing regularly, which I'm assuming you already do. Yes, there still is some smell, but that is completely normal, so you have no reason to worry =]
My sister is an athlete, shes usually the lowest person on her team, as in not so good. She does track and cross country. The problem is after she smells so bad, and she will smell up the house. My mom is a single parent and cant smell for a dollar. I told my sister she smelled and I got yelled at. When I have to take showers after her Im afraid I smell terrible and I drown my self in perfume. I live with the grossest people around. Help, what can I do. Im a clean person and I dont want to smell
Smell isn't like the cold. If other people you live with smell, you will not start to smell weird if you are a clean person.
Even if she "stinks up the shower", you are using different water to wash yourself with, so unless you rub yourself all over the walls when you shower (most don't) the smell will not touch you.
If it is the smelly house you are worried about, you can buy cheap air fresheners around drugstores to plug in and or spray on furniture.
Ok, I just got an Ipod nano about 2 weeks ago. Everytime I plug it into my laptop to charge it, it freezes up! It won't charge, and it'll stay like that for about 2 days! I don't know what to do, and I don't know if I should return it or not. Has anyone else had this problem? What can I do?
You may be plugging it in wrong... before you decide to swap it, try unplugging it and replugging it in with the little grey rectangle on the charger facing up (and your ipod also facing up).
Also, if you ever have trouble with your ipod freezing, pressing the top and the middle "buttons" and holding them will reboot it.
Me and my boyfriend been kicking it for a hott minute. Im 16, he 17. But he dont trust me worth nothing. It just recentley came up though, It never used to be like this. Im thinking its because we are alot more serious than what we were, and his intentions are good, but its annoying when your boyfriend dont trust you. He doesnt like me talking to no boys. And i grew up with a whole bunch of guys. They been my best friends since day one, and he claims we doing stuff behind his back. Im tired of him trying to run my life. Should i cut him loose?
If a guy is telling you who you can and cannot hang out with, it shows that there is a side of him that is controlling - really not a good thing.
If he never used to be like this, you should probably figure out what is causing it, then decide whether or not to cut him loose. Have a talk with him where you figure out exactly why he feels the way he does and try to soothe his fears. Make it clear that you are not interested in your friends, but that you are still going to be friends with these boys.
If he does not change after this conversation and keeps acting jealous, you need to cut him loose. Being controlling in who you can and cannot see is annoying, and it is also a sign that he could become more controlling than he is already in the future.
I am 16 and I am dating my brothers best friend who is 19. It is a long distance realtionship, and I recently found out he cheated on me we are still dating but I am wondering if I should end it???
It all depends if you think you can trust him again, and how much the both of you are still interested in the relationship.
If it's long distance, the relationship is already harder to hold onto to. It could be the distance is too much for him and he's getting disinterested, which would make it easier to cheat.
Talk it over with him and see if you can forgive him/trust him again, bearing in mind that it's already going to be harder to trust him if you can only see him every now and then.
End it unless there is some really good reason not to.
First of all, before you get to my question, I would like to state that I do not think I'm fat, I'm healthy, I'm a tiny bit underweight. But I DO NOT starve myself or throw up my food.
I saw this definition of a binger, and it said someone who eats excessively or goes on a splurge. Well, I'm an excessive eater. I am taking Health (as part of the school graduation requirements) and it said in the text that a person should eat when they have feelings of hunger.
Well, I can't remember the last time I was hungry. I eat as a habit; I eat when I'm bored, when I'm happy, when I'm sad. I eat a variety of foods, lots of foods that are prepared with lots of butter and oil (that I can't help, our culture just eats a lot of food high in fat content). I won't really go into what I eat exactly, but I eat pretty much constantly during my non-sleeping hours with just two 2-3 hour breaks.
I eat to the point my stomach is bloated. I am almost always constipated. Sometimes I can barely stand up because I ate too much, let alone do anything.
Is this some sort of eating disorder? I'm kind of worried about my weight for the future, because I will have to quit all of my athletic activities soon (I'll be going away to college), and I know that I will have a huge weight gain when I stop exercising.
For now, I swim 9-11 times a week, so the food just melts right off. But I know I will have very bad health problems if I don't stop. I think I should start stopping now, but its hard because food is my addiction. Any ideas on how to stop? And would this be considered an eating disorder?
By the way, I guess I am trying to gain a little weight so that I won't be considered underweight.
Actually, eating every 2-3 hours isn't particularly abnormal. In fact, it's recommended over the three meal a day system that most people have, because our bodies were designed to eat lots of little meals over a few big ones. As well, in your case, because you swim a lot, it's probably necessary for you to eat the amounts you eat.
However, if you are eating to fill some kindof emotional void, or regularly eat until you can barely stand, you probably do have some sort of eating disorder.
I'm no psychologist, so if you are worried you should probably ask the advice of a guidance councilor, therapist, or a trusted adult.
I wouldn't worry that much, though, considering the amount you exercise. If you were to stop swimming as much as you now do, the amount you eat would probably naturally go down.