Hi, My real name is Daniel. Im an expert on youth affairs (issues) and you can ask me questions on:
Love and Relationships
Sexuality
Dating
Puberty
And anything else to do with youth/teenagers
Drop me a line!
I give advice from my point of view.
So go ahead ask me a question.
Ill give you my best advice.
See you soon.
jumadel
Gender: Male
Location: U.K, England, Greater Manchester
Occupation: Expert in Youth Issues
Age: 15
AIM: Give people expert advice for FREE!
Member Since: June 6, 2006
Answers: 432
Last Update: July 23, 2006
Visitors: 21706
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16/f
i've never had a real relationship. im not fat, or ugly. i have a lot of friends but i can't seem to find a guy for me. every time i meet one, they sweet talk, and i fall for them and they get what they want out of me and then leave me. i fall for it everytime and i hate it because i am a mess because of it. i started doing really stupid things because im getting depressed. i hate that fact that i did that and im changing. but im still depressed. will i ever find someone for me? it seems all of my friends have found their special someone. whats wrong with me?? i dont want to be an easy peice of ass. but i am. i dont mean to be it just happens because all they need to do is tell me im beautiful and i cant say no. im longing for someone to care for me. and anyone i trust, they betray me.
help, or anything would be greatly appreiciated.
xo (link)
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Hi, Im positive you will meet your match if not soon but you will. Try and talk to many guys, and start a conversation. It is good that you've got alot of friends because guys usually go for girls who have friends, but guys also like a girl with high self-esteem and confidence. To increase your chances of finding someone, then I say mix with the crowd. What I mean is go to disco's, join a club or group, go out with your friends and just get noticed a bit more. Give it a try. If you do find someone just be aware that they may be using you. But it's just a matter of having confidence and approaching and talking to guys with style and confidence. Daniel.
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First, thanks for reading this. I've been dating a 40 yr old man, Chris, for a couple of weeks, and we get along really well, I like him a lot, and he feels the same way. Last week, I met a guy online, Jon, who is 26, much closer to my age of 22. Jon and I have an amazing connection, he's everything I ever wanted in a man, except that he smokes...and he lives two hours away. I'm having trouble deciding which relationship to pursue. Should I drop Chris and see where things go with Jon, even if I'd only see him once or twice a week, or forget about Jon and keep seeing Chris, who lives in my town? I'm so confused, and I really need help! Do you have any suggestions on what I should do to decide? Thanks! (link)
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Hi, personally I think you need to mix with someone your own age group like Jon. There is 18 years between you and Chris were as theres only 4 between you and Jon. You say that you and Chris get on well. It sounds as though you could be really good friends with him and go out with Jon who is a similar age group to you. However this is your decision. Daniel.
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im not really sure my boyfriend likes me. there is a 3 year age difference. and he thinks i dont trust him. what should i do?? (link)
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Hi, you need to talk. Ask him why he thinks you don't trust him. Maybe you should ask him if he does like you just to be sure. Yeah, just talk it over with him. Daniel.
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hi-i need your help. i really like this guy. he cute, funny, and athletic. i've talked to him before but only had one conversation. he also smiles at me and stays around me but never told me that he likes me. its obvious that he likes me but i might not see him again. since the school year his over, he graduated and i have two more year left before i graduate. the only memory i have about him is our middle school year book. he is going to a different high school then me (because i am switching schools and it goes into a high school) and i've never seen him out side of school before. also my friends always talk about him. they say how weird he is and are mean to him but its too late for me to stop it. also i wouldn't want to look stupid if i stand up for him. they think that he is a geek but actually he is one of the coolest guys in our school. (he isn't nerdy looking or has glasses or any of that stuff) i have no idea what to do if i see him. the next time i see him could be in 2 years and i already might have gotten over him. please tell me what to do. thanks! (link)
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Hi, just talk to him and maybe give him your phone number or E-mail or better still your address. If he phones you or anything like that then it looks as though he's interested to get to know you, but if he doesn't then he's probaly not interested. This will be a great thing to do, because it will let you know wether or not he's interested in you or not. Hope things go well. Daniel.
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Well my boyfriend (of 6 days shy of 10 months) lets call him Steve, well, he has a problem with my best guy friend, we'll call him Joe.
Steve told me that he doesn't like Joe because i simply tell him too many things, and i talk to him too much. But Joe is almost like a best friend to me, and nothing more.
Now, Joe has a girlfriend, who i am good friends with. Accually today was their one year anniversery. So no, we have nothing going on between us more than a friendship.
So i don't see why my boyfriend is over-reacting, he knows i love him, and only him.
Joe loves his gf, and wouldn't like anyone else.
I mean, Joe has given me very sweet compliments, calling me beautiful, because i have a very low self-esteem, so he tries to change that, but nothing will ever change the confidence in my self.
He's just a nice guy, who i'm very good friends with i can trust Joe with a lot of things.
And i love my boyfriend to death, but i really wish he wouldn't have a problem with Joe, and Steve does know that Joe has complimented me, and didn't have a problem with it, he agreed.
How can i have Steve not have a problem with Joe?
Thanks a bunch. :] (link)
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Hi, guys do tend to be wary of other guys if they are friends or close to their girlfriends. It's perfectly normal though. All you can do is tell him straight that you don't think of Joe more than a friend. You love him, and he needs to understand that. Try and make it clear but simple for him to hopefully understand. Daniel.
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my boyfriend and i had been going out since febuary 17, 2004 so a little over 2 years, everything was perfect we were madly inlove and it was so nice and great he helped me when i needed him and he would help me everything he was my prince charming!!! but anyway one night we were at a big party my good friend had this summer it was in june like june 10th around then, but anyway and there is this girl who loves my old bf i mean she would do anything in her power to try to break us up. she pulled out a bottle and demanded we play spin the bottle! i didnt want to because i figured she mad it so it would land on him and of course it did he told her he would only kiss me and thats it! and she jumped on him and started making out with him the worst part was he started making out with her back and i know because i saw his tongue involved. after my friend pulled the girl off of my bf he stared at me and i just started crying i usually dont cry but something made me want to cry!!! he came by me and hugged me and i pushed him to the ground he tried to apologize but i didnt want to hear it my best guy friend came over and hugged me and told me that he was a jerk and that everything was going to be ok. i didnt talk to my bf the rest of the night then next day i checked my email and there was 10 emails all with the same subject i dont like her is what they all said, so i told him i finally forgave him and things were good for about a week then he invited me over and i decided to go biiig mistake when he came to the door i noticed his friends b. and j. were there with there girlfriends who i knew and we were friends it was all good and everything was going great until his neighbor (who is the girl i hate who loves him) came over she and him flirted the whole time in front of me and then if it didnt get anyworse she started kissing him and touchin his tush again he just let her do it but this time i threw this soccerball on the ground at them while they were kissing and slammed the door on my way out. he chased after me and grabbed me \"babe i\'m sorry she just kisses so well i cant stop!\" i smacked him across the face and tried to get him to let go of me but he wouldnt \"im not cheating on you i love you and you know that\" he said \"do i\" i snapped back and kicked him in the nuts and walked off he told me he was sorry but i told him that we couldnt go out anymore and its been 3 days since i told him we couldnt go out now he wont stop calling me sending me emails practically stalking me telling me hes so sorry and loves me and wont do it anymore but i dont know i have to admitt i still love him but i dont want to be hurt anymore i really miss him but i dont like being treated like this please tell me what you think (link)
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Hi, personally I don't think you should have kicked him in the private parts, but from the sound of things he deserved it. He was given a warning and now a second chance. I think you should talk to him about this, sort it out and come to some arrangement. Tell him that this is the last chance because he would have already had 2 chances to get this right. If he does do it again, then one can only suggest that he's taking the mick and he musn't see his relationship with you that important because he obviousley doesn't sound as though he know's how you feel. See how it goes though. Daniel.
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my boyfriend is about to leave for basic and i want to get him something he can use daily or see or whatever to remind him of me...any ideas? (link)
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Hi, get something small and simple like a photo of you in a frame perhaps. Daniel.
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Hey,
My name is lola and i am a counseller on this site, and i usually help people,give them advice, cheer them up and tell them to move on wtih their lives and stuff. But the thing, that i am very depressed and unhappy myself.
This may seem to you as if its not even a problem, but because i live in egypt and i am a muslim, then its considered as a really huge problem. Umm.. my parents don't approve of dating ,and besides , its also against my religion rules. But, i dated this boy in grade 8 and we stayed for a couple of weeks, until my mom found out and she totally freaked out and said she'd never trust me again. But then she gave me another chance, and then later on in grade 8, i had this sex and porn chat with a boy ,and my mom found out about it again, and she hit me and yelled at me, and my sisters told me what a bitch i am( and i don't blame them), and no one talked to me for a long time.Then everything was cool again,and believe it or not, they gave me another chance, but then in grade 9, i dated another boy, and i allowed him to touch me, and we were on the verge of having sex, when he showed me his penis and i touched it, but then i backed out and couldn't go any further. Then he went and told practically all the boys in our school what i did, and then all the boys started touching me, my ass and my breasts, and i allowed them, and just laughed or smiled when they did so. Later on,the whole school knew that i was a slut and a bitch, and so did my mom and sisters know what i did, and i lost all my friends, and i was allowed to go to the club alone anymore to attend my practise, and i wasn't allowed to own a cell phone or go out with friends, or chat on the internet, and i didn't go to school till the end of the year, i attended the final exams, and till today, i am still grounded and i totally lost my mom's trust, and every thing is just so screwed up.i lied so much, and i hurt alot of people's feelings and i treated my friends whom i spent 6 years of my life with, i treated them like shit, and i lost every single one of them. I feel so miserable and guilty, and although this was like several months ago, i still cry about it every night, and see it in my dreams, and all my thoughts are about it. i know that god is mad at me, because all that i have done was against my religion, and the most horrible thing is that i knew that it was against my religion, and that my mom would soon find out, and i knew that this would all happen, but i still did it, and i don't know why. I am a horrible terrible slutty bitch ,and thats how i'll always be known to people and to my own family.
I am going to grade 10 next year, and to a whole new school, because my mom wants me to make a whole new reputation there, and friends, and stuff. I tried alot to overcome the problem, and move on, and change who i am and what i have become, and make friends and new hobbies and things to take up my time. And i also came to work on this site, because i thought that i wanted to help people with their lives and prevent them from doing the mistakes that i've done in my own life. But i tried and tried to forget, i just simply can't. and i pray everyday to god and talk to him and beg him to forgive me, but the guilt and misery and depression in my is terrible... terrible to know that you have lost the most amazing things in your life andthe closest people to your heart for something you've done and you knew that it was wrong, and yet you did it and repeated it once and twice and three times, and mabye four but i can't remember.
Look, i don't know why i am asking for your advice, and why now?and not along time ago,and why you especially? but mabye you could advise me with something good. Thanks alot for your time. (link)
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Hi, most of what you did might have been against your religion but to most other people it isn't all that bad. Have a talk to your mum and set out some rules maybe for next time. You are allowed to go out with boys and stuff like that because it's only natural to do these things, especially if your a teenager. Just because your muslim doesn't mean you can't try and do things like everyone else. Your going into 10 grade next year so set some goals, then discuss your goals with your mother. Make sure that some of these goals are what you want as well as your mother. Hope things go well. Daniel.
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how to make friends in highschool?
cause im very very nervous (link)
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Hi, just be yourself and talk to people. If someone talks to you then talk back and get a conversation going. Join a group or club. But yeah just go around and talk to people you would like to get to know. Daniel.
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Im 16 and sexually active i either have sex or oral sex at least once or twice a day. Can this hurt my sperm count or density in any way?? Im worried becuase my sperm looked alittle thin (link)
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Hi, I shouldn't amagine it's the sperm but if you do it on a regular basis then it will probaly feel a bit sore. Hopefully though you ware a condom and are aware of the risks or consequences. There are also STI's you can get an all. Daniel.
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I feel like I am ready to have sex with my boyfriend. My problem is that I was raped and thats how I really lost my virginity. This would be my real first time and I dont want to be nervous or bad at it sense my boyfriend is experianced.
first question: How can I stop my nerves
second question: How can I make it romantic and nice for him. making love not just sex.
and any other advice you have.
thank you (link)
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Hi, you might be feeling nervous because you want everything to be right. There is no right or way to have sex because it's just shoving the penis into your vagina. Are you emmbarressed about showing each other your body parts? There is nothing to be nervous about, I reckon your nervous because it's your first time and you want to make it right. It's not about showing a good impression or doing it right, it's about showing him how much you care and how much you enjoy being with him. It should come naturally. The best way to make it romantic and nice is to perhaps just cuddle and lie next to each other after sex or explore and just simply kiss. Just have lots of fun, no one is perfect at this. Daniel.
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OKay im 14/f and i have a guy friend whos 15 he is like my best friend and he has always been there for me... but latley weve been talking about like doing stuff with eachother and like fooling around... but like we wouldnt have sex or anyhting close to it.. but like do you think it will ruin our friendship or change it for the worse?????
(link)
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Hi, I think he wants to move it to the next level, RELATIONSHIP. Daniel.
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ok all of my friends are having sex (and there all around 15 and 16, and i am 15.) And I don't feel like people our age are ready to have sex yet...but all of my friends are telling me how much fun it is, and they kept telling me how i need to lose it. I kept telling them that i'm not ready, but they keep pressuring me to have it. How can I get it throgh there head that i'm not ready and I don't want to lose it untill i'm ready? (link)
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Hi, the only thing you can do is simply tell them that your not ready. If they can't except that, then it's their problem. Daniel.
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Okay so I've been with this boy for nine almost ten months. We've done everything (except he never went down on me if that even matters) But the thing is he went out with a girl for 9 months on and off before we went out and this girl and i have never really gotten along. To put it in the nicest way, i hate her with a passion. Recently i have found out that they were talking on the phone..... and knowing her she probably either likes him still or wants to break us up. She has said that she hates him so much blah blah and a bunch more bull shit but then shes now talking to him? i dont get it. I know i am extremly jelous and in my case its not a good thing. I am a nervous reck all the time. He is in nationals for 6 days which is no big deal because i have rarley been able to see him this whole summer. The only thing differnet from the rest of the summer is that i cant even call him. I only just found out about this phone call the day he left for minnesota for the volleyball nationals. When he comes back we wont have much if any time to hang out because he has a volley ball camp at lyola college within the week he comes home. He isnt one to talk about akward/hard situtations things i mean i've tried talking to him about things on the phone and it doesn't work at all. I want to know if i am being to nervous and letting my jelously take over me? And when do confront him about this what excatly should i say? The thing is we had sex not to long ago which makes this much harder because it makes me think he doesnt mean it when he says "i love you" any other comments on the situation are good too.
16/f thankks (link)
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Hi, this girl is probaly from the sound of things try'in to either come between the relationship or she likes him too. You would have every right to talk to him about it. Just tell him when he comes back when your in a conversation that you heared them two talking and was wondering what it was about. If he loves you, then he wouldn't be seeing any other girl behind your back. Listen to what he's got to say and make a decision. Daniel.
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This guy liked me for several years. He told me and asked me out several times. I started to like him too. We decided to try it out, and for several months we were blissfully happy. And then it all went wrong. I got mad about something I heard about him cheating on me, he got mad I didn't trust him and dumped me on the spot. First issue in our relationship and we're over. He then expected me to be friends with him but I said screw you and blocked him.
My mom reckons he was just using me. I just can't understand why he would, but then why would he give up on me so easily? I know he had liked me a long time yet one bad thing happens and it's over. Just like that. No attempt to work things out.
I tried to make a complete break of him and get him out of my life and for a few weeks I didn't hear from him. Then he messaged me out of the blue and we started talking. And we discussed where it all went wrong, and he said he had been planning to do it for a while but he was going to do in person. Then he said "let's meet and work it all out, perhaps get back together, at least let's be friends" and agreed and went up to him the next day, and he made me feel like a fool by saying there was nothing else to work out. He said he only wanted to be friends again. So I yelled at him that night and said I no longer wanted to try and be friends and he said I was a bitch because we had been friends for so long and I was throwing it all away. I told him it was no longer my concern and if he wanted to work things out, he had to come up to me and do it in person and he was the one who gave up on us so easily. Haven't heard from him since. The truth is, I didn't wanna be friends because I couldn't get over him that way.
We work together so I see him all the time. And I can't get over him even though he's such an asshole and he's probably over me. What should I do? Am I a bitch for not being friends with him? And why would he give up on us so easily if he had liked me so long? That makes me so mad.. I wanted to work things out and he didn't.. I can't figure it out.
thanks. (link)
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Hi there, your not a bitch or whatever. In fact that doesn't even make any sense. He might have gave up because he lost interest in you and must have only felt lust. He probaly liked other girls an all. This doesn't really make much sense so he was either playing with you or he had something on his mind and was all over the place with his ideas and what he says. He didn't really sound that interested in the relationship so he probaly wasn't interested in you. Your better off without him because Im sure you can do alot better. Good relationships require great communication. Daniel.
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What does an IOU have written on it.
its my boyfriends bday, and he was recently injured so im trying to do a cute IOU for us to go to a college football game or a local teams baseball game, when hes able to walk again.
what could i put on it?
im gunna have one shaped like a football, then another shaped like a baseball. But i dunno what to put on it.
thanks so much =] (link)
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Hi, maybe something like "your everything, that a girl would want" or a simple "I love you". Daniel.
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Ok..soo i met this guy at a baseball game and he got my number from one of my guys friends. So he called me that night..and now we talk on the phone every night. And i mean we're starting to like eachother but the problem is..he lives like an hr n 30 min away. We really want to hang out..cuz we've only met once. But the problem is..it wont be awhile till come up there again..like the end of the summer. WHat should i do? (link)
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Hi, do you have axcess to a bus or can your parents drop you down? Just keep phoning and E-mailing each other from time to time. Try and see if there is any transport or your parents could take you down there once a month or something. Long distance relationships usually don't work out though. Daniel.
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So there's this guy at work (we're both 17) that I really like. When ever we work together, I always talk to him, sit with him on my break and stuff. My other 2 friends that work with him in his department keep joking around that we should hook up, which makes me wonder if he talks about me or has told them something. I also don't want it to get out that I like him because he's a good friend of mine and i don't want it to be weird at work if i did make a move or if he knew I liked him. I gave him my e-mail address 30 days ago, so like a month ago, and he never did anything with it. no e-mails or anything. so i don't know if he does actually like me like that and i would prefer not to have to tell anyone about it 'cause i don't want him to find out......
What should I do??¿?? (link)
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Hi, sometimes if you give a guy an E-mail they can feel a bit nervous about what to say and stuff. Just mention it again or ask him out. Eventually you should get the message wether or not he's interested. Daniel.
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i called me ex desprate cause when he was dating me he was talking alot of shit on this one girl
saying shes a slut how he doesnt like being around her how hes never going to date her
and as soon as we break up he randomly flirts with her and... kisses her on the cheek.
isnt that desprate?
and this to
he met this girl over myspace and they talk about meeting and if they life close they would date
isnt that being desprate also?
sorry i asked 2 questions in one
(link)
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Hi, he might just be desperate because it sounds as though he really just wants any girl that he likes. Daniel.
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my boyfriend has gone away for about 2 weeks and I wont be able to talk to him until he comes back. I want to suprise him and have some really special things for us to do when he gets back. Could you guys help me brainstorm some ideas?
I love him so much I want to show him (link)
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Hi, heres a list of things you can do:
1. Go to beach
2. Walk in the park
3. Have a picnic
4. Dinner out
5. Movies
6. Do something that you both enjoy doing
Daniel.
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