Sweet_LiL_Angel's advice column

askSweet_LiL_Angel

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: Sometimes, I wake up in the middle of the night in my baby sisters room over her crib with a spoon, screaming random things. It's really concerning me. It happens at least twice a week, and its always in my sister's room. I'm confused because 1) Where did the spoon come from? (I don't keep any in my room..) and 2) What is wrong with me? My doctor said it was just sleep walking, but I think there's a psychological issue there somewhere.

Well how old are you first of all. Do your parents give your little sister more attention then then they give you. Are you mad at her for any reason. deep down think whats bothering you sit down and jolt it down ways to fix if you feel left our like shes getting more attetion is talk to your parents and tell them how you feel. if you are upset with your sister maybe she always gets in your stuff depending on her age talk to her. or play with her a little more

Q: i've always been wondering about these questions.

1. so what if there were two lesbians or two gay men, one acts girly and the other one acts manly. wouldn't that make them straight?

2. what if there were two straight people and the male acted girly and the female acted manly. wouldn't that make them gay or lesbian?

3. alot of people say you can only lose your virginity once, but my friend is bisexual and she thinks you can lose it twice. once to a male and once to a female. so does it depend on the sexual orientation on how you think about it?

the answers to 1 and 2 the way you act has nothing to do with your sexuality you can be a man who acts just like a female in many ways but still like female. and you can not lose your virginty more than once.

Q: I'm 18, and I'm pregnant. My fiance, he's happy I just told him not to long ago and he went from being a total creep to me, to being the perfect guy. Why? I don't know. He's just amazing. My Dad on the other hand..... Not so much, remember that saying your dad always told you when you were little. "I'll always have your back not matter what." Well what the heck happened to that? Me and my dad used to be really close. But now it seems that he can't stand to be around me. He keeps dropping hints that he wants me out, but for right now I don't have any where to go, or I would get out. I wish I knew what to do, I guess that is why I'm resulting to this. And not I'm not asking if I should keep my baby, I'm going to keep my baby. Deffinately. I love my child already. And so does the father of my child. My question is what the hell do I do about my dad?

Congrats. I am pregnant to and my family was shocked since my husband has a 6 year old and I have a 3 year old. but any ways you need to sit down with your father and explain to him that you love him and he is making you feel like crap. Tell him that it wasnt planned but you do not believe in abortion or adoption if you dont have to do it and you are wanting to keep the baby. Fathers are the hardest to talk about with this. just dont sound mean and if he gets mad and starts yelling some tell him you dont want to fight with him and when he calms down.

Q: weve ben going out a year and a half and were extremely close. him and my bestfriend fell in "love" and hungout alot without me. i still dont know if they did anything. but that was about two months ago, and once again hes acting like he doesnt know me he didnt even get me a christmas present or even feel bad about it. he keeps cancelling plans on me. i have two exs and they both cheated on me i cant take it if he does it too. but he acts like he loves me so much when were ever together alone. today and tomarrow we have snowdays and were gona hangout all day and he cancelled on me both days and saturday. help? i cant handle this, he acts like im his world and his true love, half the time..

from what you have said it sounds like its possible he is cheating on you or talking to another female. I had an ex whom I thought was cheating on me but I was not going to break up with him until I new for sure if he was cheating on me or not. We lived together and he just made me feel alone. he worked his job twice a day but his hours that he worked at night would get later and later. He keep accussing me of cheating on him. So I had a mad feeling when I worked one day and he wouldnt answer the phone or text message me back or anything but that night his phone was "dead" he was hanging with one of his guy friends in the other room so I looked at his phone and there were text messages to a phone number he told me was a guy friend. it was a female he told her he loved her etc. but i was a mess for like 2 months although i meet the man of my dreams after that and we are married now with a baby on the way. if it turns out he is cheating its not the end of the world because there is a man out there who wont do that to you.

Q: ok, if you are reading this you probably have already read the first part and know pretty much the whole story..

so recently my stepmom and dad got into a huge fight. my dad was working that day so i went over to comfort her. she told me she talked to her younger son, 16, (my stepbrother). she told me that he said something about me. She said he said " it hurts him to see me going through all this drama all over again, considering ive seen my mother suffer because of my dad and now to see my stepmom who is also my bestfriend suffering is like the past repeating itself. he also supposably said that he feels that i am part of his family because they suffered all their lives like i have.. also stating that i am brave, kind, pretty and have a big heart and that he feels bad seeing me in situations like this." when i heard this i couldnt help but cry. i burst out crying because no one has ever said anything like that or that nice about me. what blew me away was that he thinks of me as pretty. no one has ever told me i was pretty when i was little or even to this day. its always you LOOK pretty or you LOOK beautiful today. i found out this out about a week ago, and i havent stopped thinking about him and wondering if he actually feels the same way about me. i dont know...im confused... what do you think???

the two of you are not really related so it really doesnt matter if you have feelings for him although to your family it may look bad. talk to him about it. Tell him your mother told me what you said about me and do you really think im pretty no one has ever said anything like that to me. etc.

Q: I have quite big problems with my family at the moment and i do get rather upset about it at times, but im not allowed to talk to any of my friends about it and talking to coucillors and adults isnt like talking to friends, what should i do?

why can you not talk to your friends about it? If you are looking for advice on the problem, contact us. We are all here to help you and give you advice in the best way possible. There are of course some people on here who are jerks and give terrible answers but I am sure you know how to tell the difference. Counslers are amazing people. You can change counslers if you are having problems with one or find it hard to talk to one. their are young counslers who understand things you go through. I would love to be a counsler I just need to get the time to go to college i have 2 soon to be 3 kids. contact me if you need someone to talk to ashaboo77@yahoo.com

Q: How would my parents go about changing my godparents? The people they chose as me and my sisters godparents from the start have two bratty kids, are druggies, are divorced, are of a diffrent religion, and we have not seen them in over 4 years. The people they want as me and my sisters godparents now have three kids, the father has sadly died (we miss you!), DON'T do drugs, ARE of the same religion, we don't get together often because we live in diffrent states but my mom and the mom of that family are best friends! So is there anything legal or religious we have to do or whatever so that they are my godparents and the druggies arent?

god parents are really the ones that were there when you were baptisted. My son wasn't baptisted because i feel he can pick his own religion. If something was to happen to your parents it needs to be in their will to whom they want to take care of you or else you will end up with closest living relitive if they wanted the responsibility.

Q: ok so i have a bf that im soo inlove with.weve made a plan for ourselves that we want to get married in 3 years once iv graduated and worked alittle etc.
2days ago i told my parents about my bf.at the time my parents were both good with everything and happy for me.my dad (bless him) even called my bf just to say hi and stuff.now everythings changing.my dad hasnt said much but my mother is driving my crazy!shes trying to talk me out of being with him because shes scared hes going to control me and shell never see me again after we get married etc.shes asking me all these questions about him and when i sy "i dont know"she makes it as if i dont know him well enough etc.i know i should just bring him home and introduce him properly but i cant with the wway my mother is reacting im scared my bf is going to get scared and leave.i dont know what to say to my mother.shes really pissing my off!my bf has anger issues and gets angry quickly.hes never been angry with me yet but she thinks hes going to get angry at me and hit me or soemthing.she thinks hes not going to be good to me.i dont know what to do or what to say because im angry at her for telling my brother about my bf when i told her not to tell anyone because i wnate dto tell him myself when i was ready now my brother is angry because i didnt tell him and kept it from him.

i dont know what to do or say..its driving me further and further away from my mother.sorry but right now i cant stand her.

i need major advice before i say soemthing ill regret!
thank youu

you need to sit both of your parents down and explain to them. You don't plan on getting married for at least 3 years at the earliest. That gives your plenty of time to get to know him and make sure he is the one for you. tell your mother that you love her very much and no one is going to make you stay away from her and if they were to try they obviously are not the one for you. inform her that you would like them to meet your boyfriend but not the way they are actting. if they have questions answer them calmly if you do not know the answer tell your mom hm that is something i havent asked him. inform her that you will ask and find out.

Q: Last time I had my period was exactly 3 weeks ago. I normally start at this time of the month.

I'm on the pill, but the past two months I missed a LOT of pills so I was having two periods a month. Which I know is not good, and don't lecture me on it because I've already heard a bunch of stuff about it, and I know I messed up.

Since the end of last month I've been making sure I take my birthcontrol on time.

Anyways, On friday it will have been exactly three weeks ago since the last time I had sex. I'm nervous because I haven't had my period yet, which normally starts, a couple of days ago. But it could be because I'm taking the pill on time now.

I know its too early to tell cause I still have basically 3 more weeks before this month is over to get my period. But 3 weeks is alot of time to worry myself to death about waiting for my period, which may not even come..

What can I do to ease my mind until my period comes, if it comes? & there's a good possiblity I'm just overreacting but it's just scary to have to wait to know.

did you have unprotected sex? if so there could be a good chance you could be pregnant. also if you stress and worry about it you will m is syour period why i have no idea it just happens. you are better off waiting a few weeks and taking a home pregnancy test or going to the doctors and taking one of their tests with is much more reliable.

Q: First of all I am 20 years old trying to findout if I am pregnant? I took a home pregnancy test to findout if I am pregnant it came out negative. I have been having different symptoms lately, really really moody , I also for the past 2 monthes have had shorter, lighter periods also lately I have been having alot of brown discharge. I'm trying to findout if I could be pregnant, I was told numerous people expierence the false negatives etc from many different friends whom have children of their own now. If possible any advice would help me out alot! Thanks!

Honestly none of us our doctors and can't give you a 100% answer. Your best bet would be to go to your doctor office and ask them if you are pregnant. You will take a test at their office it doesnt take very long. If they tell you no. Tell them what is going on. Their tests are so much more accurate. I took two pregnancy tests that were negative. I had this feeling that I was pregnant. I waited a couple more days and told my husband lets just try one more test so we bought a test that had two in it. went home to take the test and it came back positive. I had to drink a ton more water to take the second test because i didnt believe the first lol. home pregnancy tests are not always the best that is why a lot of people take more than one.

** yes i had a few. the lighter periods and discharge but also it could be signs of the start of your period which can occus weeks before your period actually starts.

Q: So I'm 15. I like this guy who is 17, he's a senior now and I'm a sophomore. Is that a big age difference? He'll be 18 in a couple months so it would be considered an adult. We're friends and all so its cool. I'm just wondering about the age and how it would be when he turns 18.

No its not a big age difference i am 18 years old and my husband is 23.

Q: Hi, I want to get into human resources. The reason I want to get my dimploma online is becasue I want to go at my own pace becasue im working full time. I was wondering if anyone knows of any online schools that offer a diplome in Human Resource and your advice on online schooling?

I would honestly try your colleges around you first. you may have to go for tests but besides that its a lot better. My aunt did a college online that didnt even count for anything. she had to find another school and take everything over again.

Q: 19/M My girlfriend and I broke up, awhile back, and my fam and I moved to an island I Love, but right after moving , my girl and I got back together and were even more in love, she is incredible! Problem is, she's on the mainland US, I'm here. My family's here, and were really close. It is SO hard to be away from either. My girl is everthing to me, but everything else I love is here. I really don't like anything else about living there on the mainland. But I can't stand being away from her. I don't know what to do anymore, any help or advice would be great! Thank you!

I wad forced by my father to move to a town I hated at first. To this day I miss my mother and my brothers family etc. But I meet a wonderful. My son absoultly adores him. We got married and have a baby of our own on the way. You are 19 so I am sure you know what love it. but what were the reasons the two of you broke up. would she consider moving. My husband would never move away from his family unless he had a gaurntee job. and even then i dont know if id want to anymore. I think if you are truely in love with her go for her. but family is something you cant live with out. you have to weigh out the decisons the pros and cons of each living situation and see if shed come to you. maybe you to could work out being friends.

Q: i just filled out something online tog et information about online courses. I filled in my real address real number and real name. I never do this but for some reason i just did it today becasue i figured its for school. Well about 1 min after I sent it I got a call from the "university" I am finding it very awkward that I would get a call right away. The people kept asking where i "live at" I found them to be very unprofessional and did not disclose any informationa nd claimed that I did not send them any information. i am scared that they are some type of fraud. the school is CTU. I am scared and am wondering if they can do anything with my name address and numeber? And what i should do to make sure they do not get any more information! i have sent an email saying I did not request information and do not want to affiliate with them? Any ideas on what I should do, or if I am overreacting?

My husband and I did the same thing. honestly they will call again tell them you enrolled in a college already and you would like to be off their calling list. Then go to your community college or a near by university. ask them about their online courses. you know their 100% legit. good luck with school!

Q: Hey, ok well this is sort of extremley embarassing and I never thought Id find myself asking this question but here goes..
Im 16/f and I noticed with my previous boyfriend whenever he em fingered me it really hurt I thought it was just him at the time being rough so I said nothing and just pretended to enjoy it,afterwards I noticed specks of blood (by the way this was the first time id been fingered by a guy) the second time was ok but still a bit uncomfortable. Anyway me and that guy split a while back.Im now with a new guy nearly 3months in a few days. So tonight was the first night we kinda messed around and it was sore again when he fingered me and yet again the specks of blood. Now Im really freaked out because I know its me..whats wrong with me? its supposed to be enjoyable I dont want to have to pretend all the time and feel discomfort but god how awkward would it be bringing it up with him? I dont want to make him feel bad and Ive noo idea how to even say it oh like btw your sort of hurting me?
Im now so worried that when I decide I want to have sex it will really hurt..well I know it does the first time but you know after that this is really getting to me and I dont know what to do I feel so stupid for asking this question but I am worried..I want it to be fun for me to and not have to dread it the whole time..is it something that will pass and Il get used to or what?
Please someone help :(
itd be much aprciated thank you
x

dont be scared about it. I had sex with a guy and i dont think he had "popped my cherry" and for a while everything my next boyfriend fingered me id bleed (never had sex with him ) so i dont know if it would have happened. he had blood on his fingers i was embarssed i said im not on my period and hes like i thought you werent a virgin imlike im not. so i dont know. its just you streching. nothing to be worried about it. its stop eventually.

Q: my period ended about a week ago and my periods are normal (they come every 28 days, every month) i've had sex for the past two days and today i was bleeding a little.. could i be pregnant? or am i just being paranoid and it's too soon to be showing any signs of pregnancy? thank you in advance

A little bleeding is common during sex. Dont stress your self out about it. If you miss a period after the day it should be there wait another week then take a pregnancy test. Do you use protection and birth control?

Q: Female-16

First of all, I have a pretty good relatonship with my mom. We can joke about stuff and get along well. Except when it comes to my clothing. She hates how I dress...skinny jeans, band tshirts, eyeliner, converse. It's the typical attire of a teenager today, right? She wants to dress me in leggings and dresses. I hate dresses and stuff like that. She sometimes makes me wear a dress and leggings when we go on an errand to walmart! She said to me twice already "I'm starting to question your sexuality." She obviously doesn't notice my crushes on rockstars and hockey players. I even have a boyfriend. I'm NOT gay.

What do I do/say to my mom to make her accept the way I want to dress?

Just tell her its how people dress now a days. Just because you dont like to dress like a "girly girl" does not mean you are a leabian. you are a typical teenager. She may just wish you dressed up likes a girly girl. I went through my phases in life. just sit down and talk to her about it.

Q: Yeah, after 3 years of not seeing him, my dad got arrested and I went to see him in prison. When he saw me & my sisters, he was so suprised. He said that he wanted to get back into our lives, and i'm cool with that. But, I'm worried that he will break my sisters' hearts by leaving again. I don't want that. I guess the question is, is it a good idea to give him a second chance, after he left once?

Honestly sweet heart. My son is three years old. His father was in and out of his life. So i mad him stay out of his life because I dont want my son hurt. Now obviously you know your father he was gone for a reason even though it was a stupid reason. Maybe you should talk to him alone and tell him you want him to be in all of your life you just dont want h im to leave again and break all of your heart.

Q: I'm a teacher in my twenties who recently went home for the holidays to spend some quality time with my parents. Upfront, you should know that my parents are VERY strict and conservative (always have been)--which is why I was shocked beyond belief when I discovered on my parents' computer that there were recent searches for porn videos. I'm assuming it was my father, because my mother rarely uses the Internet and many of the search phrases involved "underage girls" (which is the most nauseating part). Now, everytime I look at my father or speak to him, I can't get the image of those words out of my head. My relationship with my father has never been strong, and this hasn't helped our situation at all (mainly because I feel like my "conservative" father who always looked down upon sex and immoral behavior is such a fraud now). I don't know if I should tell my mother, confront him, and/or just keep my trap shut and push this whole thing out of my mind. Am I overreacting here?

Sincerely,
Disturbed Daughter

My father is the same way. When I was about 16 my mother and him split up I was going on a date and trying to find something to wear. I was looking in the mirror and he said my a** looked great in the pants I was wearing. He would say dirty comments. Look at a lot younger females like around the high school. its your parents "sex life" probably isnt how it used to be and thats his way of getting it up I know it sounds nasty but thats how older men are a lot of them. he still wants it your mother probably does not. etc.

Q: im a 16 year old girl and recently got in trouble for sneaking out of my fathers house. I went to hang out with a really good friend of mine...when we were hanging out my dad called his cell phone...my friend immediatly took me back to my street...when i walked up to my drive-way there was a cop sitting in it...i walked inside to see my step-mom, father, and lee county sheriff. The cop left...and the lecture began...but it was my step-mother yelling...my father just kind of stood there. So i was told to pack my things and get ready to go back to my moms house...then my step-mom called my friend(kyle) nd yelled at him and told him to get back over to my house...before he arrived 2 lee county sheriffs showed up...after they questioned kyle they let him go...nd i returned inside...my stp-mother said that i would not be returning to their house...i went home the next morning after church...a few days later my mother was talking to my father on the phone...he then said the same thing my step-mom had said..."she's never coming over again" Now hearing it from my sob step-mom is one thing...but hearing it from my dad is different...im his only blood related child nd his "little girl" nd he turned his back on me for breaking one rule at his house! i have never done anything like this at his house before...but for him to basically shun me cut deep. I havent spoken to him since sunday which has been almost a week...my father usually calls me 2-3 times every 4 days...i have not received one phone call...i love my dad soo much...but i dont know how to deal with the fact that he doesnt want to be in contact with me...please help...i need my father in my life!

You need to talk to your father. Apoligize to him tell him you are sorry for sneaking out and you know he was worried about you. Tell him you are sorry for upsetting him you didnt mean to up set him you just weren't thinking about that and let him know you love him and dont want him to be so mad at you.

bio

My name is Ashley. I am 22 years old. Ill be celebrating my 3rd 21st birthday June :) . I had my first child at 15. I got married at 18 and had another child shortly after. They have two different fathers. I am currently going threw a divorce. I moves states after we seperated ( ugly seperation) but I had no family in that state. I left everything except my beautiful babies and our clothes. I found a job up north and things are going good. I am dating. I have been in abusive situations. I am going to college for psychology and sociaology. Im here to listen help and give you advice ive been in alot of different situations and can relate to a lot.