Ask me anything, but I prefer questions about menstruation, spirituality, feminism, and history.
However, since there are so many confuzzled, "shy," young women out there, I usually end up answering questions about dating.
Website: MySpace
E-mail: kleokriesel@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Location: I'm from Chicago, but I go to school in Milwuakee
Occupation: student
Age: 21
AIM: kleokriesel
Member Since: March 4, 2005
Answers: 177
Last Update: February 12, 2007
Visitors: 11153
Main Categories:
Activism
Spirituality
School
View All
Favorite Columnists
spacefem
FernGully
|
| |
|
this sounds really crazy but i dont know what to belive in ! i have been baptized etc but i dont belive in god, jesus , any of it my mum baptised me so i didnt have a say my step sister belives in 14th century witch craft and im interested as my sister told me that there first rule is " do what u please aslong as it does not hurt a soul" and that makes soo much scence to me ! i no this sounds different wicht craft etc.... but i want to learn what the do and how to become 1 i cant ask my sister as she and i dont talk etc ... does it mean that because im baptised i cant take another religion where could i find advice on this 14th century witch craft and advice will help xxxx (link)
|
Go to your library and/or bookstores and find books about Paganism, witchcraft, Wicca, and whatever else you're interested in. I used to be Pagan - and I was baptized - and I think it can help you spiritually.
Please spell and punctuate properly, your question is very difficult to read.
|
|
I am still stuck on this issue. As you could see from my past questions, I need serious help with this issue. My husband does not accept me for my baptism. Even though I was like 5 and have not sinned and did not know the difference as I do now, does that make it wrong? I feel like I am going to lose my husband because of this. He will not leave me. This is my personal feeling. I want my husband to accept me fully. We have difference views on certain topics in the Bible. He does not believe certain things I have to say. He is always right. How am I suppose to know which interpretation is the right one? Was I baptised wrong? Should I follow my husband and his belief for the sake of our marriage and our future children and be baptised in his church? We are both Christians, but different kind of churches. But I only believe in one baptism. Should I not be baptised and just suck it up and go to church with him and forget it? I do not want to have to go to different churches and how could I raise my child that way? He will not leave his church and allow us to be "one" as marriage should be. I am willing to do this. What should I do? I am so lost. I don't know if I should talk to a therapist or what. (link)
| |
It sounds like he doesn't respect your beliefs, which might be a symptom of a bigger problem. If either of you value religious details over your relationship, little can be done to improve it. Talking to a therapist would probably help both of you as a couple and as individuals.
|
Alright. Well, my best friend in the whole world is starting to confuse me. She is a real big Christian, as am I, and I understand that. But sometimes when I turn on the radio and like rap or something comes on, shes like "God doesn't want you listening to that." But then she will go to a party and dance to that same music. We are in 6th grade and she is dating an 8th grader, I'm pretty sure God doesn't want her doing that either. How do I explain to her that its ok to listen to the music you like or the shows you like?
Plz help! I will rate 5 to any resonable answer! (link)
| |
She might just be saying that because she doesn't like the music but she doesn't want to sound bossy. Let her do what she wants to do and do what you want to do. Just because she disagrees or maybe thinks that God looks down on it doesn't mean that you have to stop
|
I put this in spirituality even though it doesn't really fit...
When I was a young teen I was very active in my church and school. I was in the choir, I helped to organize the children's liturgy, and I took part in the discussions and events that our Catechist organized all the time.
When I was seventeen I feel in love with another girl. For a few months we kept our relationship secret, but eventually it had to come out and my church pretty much ostracized me and told me in no uncertain terms that my help was no longer needed. My relationship with that girl lasted for two years and we are still very close friends. What happened with my church makes me very sad, but I don't regret my choices. I am a bi-sexual woman and I'm not ashamed of it.
The problem is now I am dating a guy and have been for a while. Old friends from the church are suddenly talking to me and being all nice and welcoming again. It's breaking my heart because I know if this relationship ends and I meet a woman I want to date I'll be kicked out again just as quickly. They keep inviting me out to dinner or to mass, (I have kept going over the years but I'm basically ignored by everyone.) Part of me wants desperately to be accepted and loved by these people again, the other part of me is just furious with the way they treated me and the pressure they are putting on me now to conform. Should I just accept this while it lasts or should I maybe say something to these people? (link)
|
Their behavior has been extremely unChristlike. They have judged you, they have kept their love from you, and they have not treated you as they would treat Jesus.
Would you be willing to attend another church, a more accepting one? Attending spiritual/religious events with these people can pollute your spirituality, so it would be best to find a more loving community.
|
how do you know if your bi-sexual ?? because i think i might be but im not sure .. like whatsz a sign of it ?? cuz like .. id have no problem hookin up with a girl or like eatin her out or somethin like that .. idk why but i juss like think its not a big deal .. an could bi-sexual lead to like lesbian ? because seriously i dont have any problemsz with gaysz or lesbiansz but i jus dont wanna be one .. like bi-sexual ? eh aint that bad n i know i proly dont have control over it or not .. but can someone PLEASE HELP ME
i RATE G0OD !! (link)
|
*reads some of the other responses you've received*
I can tell you that you are not bisexual and you are most certainly not a lesbian. There is much more to sexuality than having "no problem" with making out with someone. If you want to have your romantic relationships be with just guys (as in, you want to date just guys) then you are straight. If you want to have your romantic relationships be with just women, you are a lesbian. If you want both or just don't care about the gender of your significant other, then you are bisexual.
|
|
how do i get a guy to call me???? (link)
| |
You don't, you call him
|
|
ok, i enjoy thinking up movies...im fourteen years old, and everytime i watch a movie, i take into perspective camera angles, acting types...im more than likely going to be a film director when i get older...but anyway.. is there anyone who knows someone or a site that i can find out more about what all i need to do with this idea, like i know writting and stuff, but i would like to find out if anyone knows anyone with contacts so maybe i can get an email address to a good director (like Ridley Scott or Randell Wallace by any chance) so that i can contact them about my idea, and maybe even make it into a movie... thanks a ton, ill post the name once there is a chace it will be made! thanks a ton! (link)
|
I did the same when I was about 14. Trust me, if you manage to find an email or mailing address for any director, actor, etc., they will ignore you. They just think, "Oh crap, another annoying little teenager with some adolescent idea."
What you can do is get a cam corder (b-day or xmas present) and some friends and make student movies. Your first movie will suck, believe me. But, once you weed out your friends who can't act and get the experience of making a movie, your others will improve greatly. Go to your neighborhood film festivals and make contacts there. Enroll your student films into film festivals. You'll probably meet other filmmakers your age and you can collaborate.
Good luck!
|
|
Ok, this boy at my school was joking around, and kept saying that I liked this boy who is kind of weird. Soo, that was a week ago, and I found out today that people believe him! I didn't think that anyone knew, but apparently, they did. I'm afraid that it will get around to the boy I supposedly like, and that he will ask me out (there were rumors that he liked me). I never know how to say no, because I am afraid that I wil hurt their feelings. I don't like this guy! please answer seriously! thanks in advance! (link)
|
I'm guessing that when you say "their" feelings, you mean "his" feelings. This is what general grammar is for.
You'll just have to tell him no. Do'nt sfice your feelings to make him feel good. And, once you tell him no, then your peers will get off your back.
|
As long as I could remeber and all my friends can agree ive looked the same ...ponytail and well obviously my cloths but i dont care about that( i go to a private school so i have to wear a unfiorm) so I think its time ofr a change, what are some things i could do with, bascily me and my hair that would be diffrent other than a pony tail. Nothing to drastic but just a change. If it helps i have shoulder length blounde hair. Thanks and please help!!!
(link)
| |
I'm guessing you wear your hair in a ponytail to keep it out of your face, right? You could cut it short. Then you could wear a headband, put it in pigtails, spike it, put it in little braids, and think up many other things. You could also give it highlights.
|
|
Me and boyfriend have been going out for 5 months and 17 days. I guarantee im in love with him and hes the ONE. Im only 13 (goin on 14) but i honestly love him. The only problem is... my parents. They think im too young to be in love and everybody else says that too! Its sooo annoying and just wish they knew how me AND my boyfriend felt about each other. Thanks bunches... (link)
| |
There is nothing you can say to convince them. All you can do is to keep going out with him. When they see how dedicated you two are to each other, they will understand.
|
I have a friend and we used to be best friends, but now i dont want to hang out with her or anything because i've noticed that shes always making fun of me and trying to make me look bad so i dont want to hang out wit her but she always is making plans that include ME.
so how can i tell her that i dont want to hang out with her without hurting her feelings? (link)
| |
Tell her how she's been making you feel and that, if she doesn't stop, you won't hang out with her any more. Give her some examples of specific incidents.
|
|
Ugh...okay I HATE my clothes. I went through this whole phase recently of "I care what everyone else thinks and my opinion doesnt matter". And that includes clothes. I wear the same old crappy polo tees from hollister and stupid jeans and stupid shoes. I just look like every other boring un-unique "prep". Well, i've finally grown out of this. I now want to start dressing like my personality which is edgy, unique, and artsy. I like rock/emo/indie music if it helps? I'm looking for some fashion tips (example...stuff like wearing your belt to the side, etc.) And some stores online I could check out to help me dress more "edgy". Also, i dont have alot of money. How can i rock out a plain polo? Any hair ideas? Makeup ideas? I hate dressing "preppy" when inside im not like that. THANKS! (link)
|
Go hunt around Salvation Army, antique and thrift stores. See if your mom, aunts, and older cousins have held onto any of their old clothes and look through them. Learn to sew.
Good luck!
|
My boyfriend was been depressed latly so i have been wanting to do something nice for him..well im only 15 and he's 17 so getting places isnt a problem since he can drive...well i donno what to do for him..i was thinking of getting him a new watch or makeing him dinner or takeing him out to dinner but im not sure. does anyone have any idea's or suggestions..or maybe share something you have done nice for your BF??
thanks a lot =) (link)
| |
You could make him a mix tape or a journal full of poems, how you feel about him, and stories of things you've done together.
|
im 14/f and i have never had a boyfriend or even a kiss. the thing is i want one but, when people like me i say no because i want the one that i like and thats all. the thing is how do i get the person i like to like me back? but they may like some one else.thanks
please dont delete (link)
|
You're just fourteen, don't worry about not having had a boyfriend or a kiss. I didn't until I was 17.
Anyway. You can't make someone like you. Just be confident, funny, caring, and yourself. If he doesn't like you, move on.
|
|
My friend is pregnant and she's only 13. She's freaking out a lot..and she wants me to help her. What should i do ? i dont wanna end up killing someone else's baby! (link)
| |
Do her parents know? It's really more of their business. You could take her to Planned Parenthood where they have people who know what they're doing and can counsel her.
|
|
ok, one of my friends thinks that i like her boyfriend but i really dont is there anyway i can tell her and maybe she'll belive me PLEASE HELP I RATE HIGH! THANK YOU! (link)
| |
Tell her you have a crush on some other guy. When she sees you liking some other guy, she'll probably realise that you're not interested in her boyfriend.
|
|
Ok here’s the situation, I’ve been seeing this girl for awhile now (over 2 years) Indeed I’m very happy and I’d say very much so in love. She makes me happy and I want to be with her, but recently I’ve met this other girl, I wouldn’t say she’s perfect for me but she’s someone I could see myself dating. Being around her makes me “funny” inside, and I think about her a lot as well as my own girlfriend. I know there is nothing wrong with my relationship now and I don’t want to cheat on her, but I don’t know. I feel a connection to this other girl, I enjoy being around her and even get a bit jealous when she’s talking about dating other guys… I haven’t known her really long; I’ve spent time with her as friend’s one on one to get away from other people. I’d never dream to cheat on my angle but these feelings make me feel so torn and confused I just wanted to know if I’ll get past these feelings or will I have to detach myself from this other girl to get rid of them and just return to complete certainty with my love. Do I really have feelings for this other girl? Or is it more or less a fad were we get along but I’m more so in love with the feelings I get with her attention? Does this mean there will be problems with me and my current girlfriend in the future? There have never been in the past… I’m so confused! (link)
| |
That's very normal. Now that you and your girlfriend are settled and comfortable with each other, you've found some excitement with this new girl. It's just a crush. Spend some more time with your girlfriend and less with this other girl. Because, chances are, if you go with this new girl, you'll find someone else eventually and you'll just be going from girl to girl.
|
|
i dont usually do this but ok..im in love with this one guy that i've been with for 11 months, and he claims he is in love with me, but when we get in an arguement he says he doesnt love me right now, which is weird bc i thought that if you was in love with someoen you would love them unconditionally, he makes all the rules and doesnt let me have input on anything.every timei talk to him i end up crying bc he hurts me so bad emotionally..the only time he acts good to me is when he is about to get something(you know what i mean) after that he's back to his normal self.what should i do? i try leaving him but i always get weak and run back to him.i love him alot and i dnt know what i should do.i try telling him how i feel and he gets pissed so i just keep it to myself..im getting really close with this other guy who feels the same way about me as i do my guy, and i dont know what i should do, i love the guy im with, not the one who treats me like a goddess,..*confused*..what should i do..sorry its so long..forgive me lol (link)
| |
He doesn't really love you, he's using you. You need to break up with him. Get some female friends to distract you when you leave him.
|
|
what are some ways to show your significant other that you really care about them thats not sexual or extreme? (link)
|
Get a card, chocolates, flowers, a mix tape, and all that stuff. Or you could make a comic strip with him/her as the superhero. Write some poetry, serious or funny. Make a photo album. Put a picture of you two on a mouse pad, notepad, or mug.
Man, these are really great ideas...I'll do some of them for my boyfriend :-) !
Good luck!
|
|
ok my best friend jayla thinks she's pretty and acts like she the prettiest one in the world. I don't like the way she acts. Her personality I don't like. She be calling other girls ugly at one minute and then the next minute, she sees her givng someone eles candy, she(jayla)holds her hand out, and expects that girl to give her candy. Now I don't know if I should be her best friend and I don't know if I shoudl even be her friend at all. She sometimes be calling me and my friends ugly, and I hate that!!! I sometimes feel like saying something mean back. But any thing that comes out of my mouth that is mean, it sometimes goes too far over the limit. she think I forgot all the things she be syaing but I don't!! and she also don't be having my back. If I were to get in a fight, then she wuold just watch. But my other friend Cornita promises she will have my back, and she do. I like Cornita alot, not like that, but as a Best best friend forever and always. Jayla, she used to be a good best friend to me now she isn't. (link)
| |
Stop being friends with her! Stop hanging out with her, find some other friends.
|
|