about

hiya I'm shelly, I'm 20 and from England. I have the best boyfriend in the world and he means so much to me. I love to help people and I've just started using Advicenators again. I hope i can help you all with your problems feel free to email me x


advice

my hair is naturally light/medium blonde, but i'd like to see what it would look like dark. i'd love to try a medium/dark brown but i dont want to pay a bunch of money at the salon for a color i will hate, cuz i've messed it up before when i had it dyed dark underneath, and getting it back to blonde was a aggravating & expensive pain in the butt process! is there a WASH OUT [as in 1-time color] temporary dye out there that i could use to dye it brown and it'll wash right out?

I dont know where you live whether its England or not but here you can get wash in wash out dye sachets. They cost about £1 and if you dont like it you can wash it out straight away.
Maybe try supermarkets because we can buy them in supermarkets here so it might be an idea to try them or maybe go into a salon and ask if they know of any wash in wash out hair dyes that you could try out first before getting it permenantly dyed
x

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Im 16/f/sophomore, and i go to a public school. I've dated a few guys. One i dated for almost 2 years and that ended in heart break, and 2 guys that didnt really act like we were going out.

im in 4-H, and there, i met a guy who is home schooled. He is 2 years older than me (a senior), never had a girlfriend, and i dont get to see him much except for 4-H. We do talk on facebook though.

I really like him, and i am really nervous. i dont know if i should ask him out, or wait to see if he asks me out, and if i ask him out, what if i get rejected?

Also, just a random thing in this, he is a foot and a half taller than me. hahah

Please help me! i really dont know what to! dont just tell me to get courage and ask him, please give me some hints of how to get the courage, and some ideas of what to say.

Thank you so much! Sorry this was kind of a long question.

You know what, Id leave it for a while. Get to know him more, talk to him more on facebook and maybe he will ask you out. If not then just ask a few of your friends, maybe your friends if they have boyfriends if they want to hang out or go to the cinema and invite him. The more you talk to him on facebook and hang out the better and something else may develop.
I hope this helps
xo

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hi!! i need some advice on my family. i am very big on nutrition and am currently trying to lose weight after leaving a particular medication.. i live with my mom and grandparents. they, however, don't have the same idea on nutrition as i do. they think that if you don't eat a steak, you are not nutritioned at all. i am a vegan. i really have been trying to cut a lot of dairy out of my diet because i have had a lot of indigestion problems... and it just has not been good. i eat a lot of tofu and very healthy things. but, i am really going to try to take some of this weight off. the thing is, that they are very unhealthy here in this house. there is always chocolate cake and different things here and it's not exactly fun. imagine being on a diet or trying to be healthier and there is always some desserts and things lying around. i know that it's impossible not to have something, but this is all the time! i'm trying to give up diet coke because i have had a really bad addiction to caffeine.... and they buy a fresh bottle every week. They also make coffee by the loads every morning. they keep ice cream in the freezer all the time! i have really been wanting to move out for a while, not because of anything or even because of this situation, just because i'm older now. but, i decided to stay here for college my freshman year because i had just found out i was adopted and it wasn't a good time to leave. but, times are tough, you know! i don't want to leave my school or go away, because right now, i have my life here already. my grandparents are older, and i just want to be with them. i have pets, and i can't just leave them here. i have two jobs here, and all my friends are here... so it's just that right now, i've established my life here. but, i do need my own space. for now, though, while that is in the works... any tips on keeping me motivated with all the junk food lying around? or a way to explain to my cuban family that there are other meals other than steak with rice and beans?? thankss

Heyy I can understand how hard it is, I secretley dieted when I was 17 because I didnt want my family to know and it was so hard with crisps, fizzy drinks and junk food everywhere you turn.
Talk to your family and just ask them if they can buy less junk food each week, maybe buy diet coke every 2 weeks or something. Or ask them to buy healthy food for you aswell as food for them. Buy flavoured water, healthy meals and healthy snacks such as fruit and low calorie cereal or fruit bars. I know its hard but think of the benefits of having a healthy lifestyle, the health benefits will be great.
I wouldnt leave home just yet because you have your job, family and friends around you and thats great, just think of other ways to get through to your family about not only buying junk food and snacks.
Good luck hunnie
xo

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i have this best friend we have been friends seen's last year we all have boy problems but hers some how seem to be worse i cant get a guy as u read in my last question but she cant get the right guy she has a lot of guys over her but theres one guy named jake she liked him for what seems to be forever he says he does't but i can tell he does i can see it every one can see it one day he text'ed us telling her he loved her it turned out to be hes brother just playing a joke on her i asked him why did he let that happen he said he does't know anything and he does't care so i asked him do you like her cause i think you do a lot then out of nowhere he tells me he has a girlfriend its not true i know that for a fact so i told her what happen'd and shes been crying for two days she wants me to tell her what to do when she goes back to school and see's him but i truly don't know what to do what should i do to help my best friend

Ok if you keep asking him and each time he says he doesnt like her, maybe he just doesnt want a relationship but if you leave him alone he might realise he does like her.
All you need is your girls when you have guy problems, hang out with her, have sleepovers, watch movies and just have fun with her. Make her forget about him and move on, there are plenty of other guys out there that will treat her well
Hope this helps
xo

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I've battled with severe and not so severe streaks of depression for what's going on to be 5 years. It started as small dips of sadness for no apparent reason, then when I found reasons- that's when the suicidal thoughts came. I haven't always been suicidal when I was depressed, it only appened about three times, and eventually I was able to stop thinking suicidal thoughts completely. Last year was my severest case of depression ever. I got addicted to pills, I was closed off, it basically was ruining my life and my relationships with family, friends, boyfriend. But I worked through it. It took a while, but I got alot better. I was truly happy for the first time in my life. But then I ended a serious relationship, I moved away from my closest friends, and basically the perfect catalysts needed to trip off my depression went into action. I need to know if what I have is deeper than just emotional, if the chemicals in my brain aren't normal. Should I seek medical attention?

Yes you do need to seek medical attention hun. Anybody who suffers depression like you do should see a doctor, they can help you and give you medication or other forms of help which will make you feel so much better
xo

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k so today i was with my bf and he was saying all these nice things about me.like he was like "oh you look extra beautiful today i just dont know what it is"...then after he said all those nice things he goes "but you really do need to loose some weight,im sure you like to eat alot,your like my little sister she loves food" i was like ok WTF.he know that i go for jogs almost everyday.i told him that i go for jogs everyday and hes like yeah but thats not enough,you should join a gym and eat less.i was speechless.
ok let me describe my body size to you.i have a large frame,im smaller from the top(size12) and bigger from the bottom (size 14)...im curvy.is this fat?do i need to loose weight?i was so hurt that i teared up.he kept apologising and didnt even understand what he did wrong.he said that where hes from its not a big deal to tell a girl to loose weight and that hes sorry etc etc.
i just dont know how to get over what he said.i know he sat there for 2hours trying to explain himself...i almost broke up with him because of this but he was determined to make everything ok.
do you think he thinks im fat because he said i need to loose weight?oh i dunno,how do i get over this???

My boyfriend has said I was fat and greedy and Im still with him because I know its true although it does hurt.
But seriously size 12 and 14 isnt fat! Im 16-18 and I do think this is fat. I have a very big tummy, bum and thighs.
It was inconsiderate of him to say it and he should think before he speaks. If you are happy with the way you look then dont bother losing weight because of a stupid comment he made. If you jog each day at least your doing exercise!
He should love you exactly how you are, and dont change for anyone hun
xox

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Im not overweight but i'd like to lose a few pounds and tone up before summer and graduation. i live in a small town so a gym is out of the question. Im gonna cut in half what i eat everyday and cut out sodas and stuff but i have no idea what to do about getting toned? I live by water so its SUPER cold right now. any advice?

If possible buy an exercise dvd that you are able to do at home.
Put on some music and dance like crazy for half an hour to an hour each day, you will tone your legs and bum.
Squats will also tone your legs and bum
Sit ups will tone your stomach
If you dont have weights, use tinned food or bottles of water to use as hand weights. It might not seem like it weighs alot but it does work.
Hope this helps.
xo

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okay..so yesterday..maybe during the middle of the day..my phone could receive text..and then at night..and still the next day..it stopped.

just stopped..i didnt have texting taken off..i can still send them..people tell me they get them..but i cant receive them. last night me and my friend were on facebook..he would send me a text..it sent..i wouldnt get it. but he would get the text that i sent to him.

what's wrong with my phone?!?

Turn your phone off and take the battery out, sometimes if you do this it works. My phone wouldnt let me get texts either so I took the battery out and put it back in. When I switched my phone back on I got about 10 texts that my friends had sent me to see if it was working
If not then Id go to a phone shop and ask them if they know whats wrong with it

Hope this helps
x

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Someone extremely close to me recently developed very, very strong feelings for someone. Now it seems apparent that nothing is going to happen between them. Now she is constantly, and I mean CONSTANTLY depressed (I live with her, so I know), just lying around and not wanting to talk with anyone. It's been going on for several weeks now, and I just do not know what to do anymore...I've tried telling her it's going to be okay and not to worry because this isn't the end of the road for her romantically, but nothing seems to help. I feel like I need to do something, but I just don't know what to do or say anymore...I can't bear seeing her like this anymore. Thoughts, anyone?

Id just make sure that she knows you are there for her, try and talk to her about it but if she wont open up then just let her know that your there for her when and if she wants to talk.
Try and have a girly day with her. Go shopping, paint each others nails, do each others make up, face masks, watch a movie. Just both have a pamper day to try and make her forget about this guy. She needs her girls around her right now.
I hope this helps
xxx

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17/f

i really want my nose pierced, lip pierced, and a tattoo. however i know that my mom will never ever let me get a tattoo and even when i turn 18 she told me if i ever showed up with a tattoo she'd kick me out of the house and be really really really mad. & i know i don't want to get on her bad side. i highly doubt she'd ever let me get my lip pierced, thats also pretty close to never. but if i got it when i was like 18 or whatever, i don't think she'd kick me out. however, when i asked her if i could get my nose pierced their was a short pause before she said no. & it seemed like she would kind of consider letting me get it. i really really want my nose pierced. what can i say or do to make her let me get it? any personal experiences on how you got something like that from your parents? thanks!

Hiii, I got my lip pierced when I was 17. I pestered my mum soooo much and everytime she said no and they looked awful on girls. I got it done one time after college and then rang her afterwards, I just kinda said "Ive had my lip pierced" she said "you better not have done" but when I got home the stud was sooo tiny that she said she could hardly notice and it finally grew on her. She hated when I changed to a ring so now I just wear the stud and she likes it. If you think your mum would maybe be like that and it could grow on her then id get it done.

Also remind your mum that the nose and lip rings can be removed whenever you dont want it.
Id think more about the tattoo though and get it when your older, because some people have tattoos when their young and end up regretting it because its what they thought they wanted as a tattoo at the time. Just think carefully

Hope this helped
xxx

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My parents told me the first day of january that they were getting a divorce. On the 24 of janurary my aunt died who was the most important person to me in the world. Six weeks later a very close family friend died. Four weeks later I broke up with my girlfriend of 3 years. It seems like my life is just going to hell. I am constantly deppresed and see a grief councilor but it dosn't help.

Im really sorry to hear about everything thats happened recently.
Your parents divorcing may be the best thing for them both. They may have been unhappy together for a long time so them getting divorced will mean that they can both live happier lives but apart. Talk to them and tell them how you are feeling about it all. Im sure they will be understanding.
Life can seem like its falling apart for you but I honestly belive that everything happens for a reason so there must be something good coming your way soon, you definately deserve it.
Id go to your GP and just tell them about it all, he may give you anti-depressents and even though this might sound scary and you dont want to take them it could help you in the long run, you will start thinking more positively. Also tell him/her that you see a greif councillor but it isnt helping. Maybe seeing the councillor isnt helping because your not ready to come to terms with the loss of your auntie, maybe you dont want to accept that she's gone. Id definately try talking to a doctor and see what he/she can do for you.

When life gives you 10 reasons to give up, show that theres 100 reasons to carry on.

I wish you the best of luck and if you ever need to talk then just send me a message and I will try to help the best I can

xxx

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At the moment my boyfriend is locked up and i am 7 1/2 months pregnant. Like 2 weeks ago my best friend kissed me and i didnt stop him . We chill like everyday now. I really to love my boyfriend but im starting to get feeling 4 my best friend. At the moment i dont know what to do. I dont know what to say or think. Can u please at least help me with this?

You should talk to your friend and ask him how he feels. Im guessing he has feelings for you if he kissed you. You need to talk with him about it. Maybe your scared because your boyfriend isnt around to help you during the pregnancy, your hormones will be all over the place at the moment so dont rush into anything and make any big decisions without thinking about things first.
I hope you work things out and I hope this helps. Good luck with the pregnancy x

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my mom broke up with my dad when i was 2 she found another guy and has been married to him a long time and he is an ass how do i get my mom to break up with him?she doesnt love him anymore anyway

I think you should sit down with your mum and talk with her about how you feel and see how she feels. You should find out why she is still with him if she doesnt love him anymore, there might be more to it than you know.
I hope this helps.x

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16/f my friend tells me that i need to get my tonsils out. they are very large, they never used to bother me but now i always feel them, they are like golf balls in my throat.i have a cold right now and my tonsils hurt al the way up to my ears. it is hard to sleep at night because it hurts and sometimes it feels like i have limited oxygeb enteering my luncs. should i get them out, please help ps: they usualy only hurt when i am sick which i am very often. thanks

Id suggest going to your doctor and telling him that they feel uncomfortable and you get alot of pain from them. He may suggest having them taking out. I hope you feel better soon x

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do you like the wish of love?


1 what smell does it have?

2 can you describe it?

3 what do you like better wish of happiness or wish of love?

4 how does wish of happiness smell like


thanks im gonna buy 1 i dont know which to buuy

I cant really describe them
Id probably say I like wish of love the best, so if you just want to buy one I would go with that one =]
I hope this helps. Sorry I cant describe them.

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which is better


Wish of Happiness Eau de Toilette Spray:

http://shop.avon.com/shop/product.asp?src_page=product_list.asp&level1_id=300&level2_id=304&pdept_id=353&dept_id=&pf_id=32683



or

Wish of Love Eau de Toilette Spray:

http://shop.avon.com/shop/product.asp?src_page=product_list.asp&level1_id=300&level2_id=304&pdept_id=353&dept_id=&pf_id=32682


or

Wish of Peace Eau de Toilette Spray:

http://shop.avon.com/shop/product.asp?src_page=product_list.asp&level1_id=300&level2_id=304&pdept_id=353&dept_id=&pf_id=32684



ONLY PEOPLE WHO HAS TRIED THEM WITH EXPERIENCE

I actually have them all lol
My fave is Wish of Peace

=]

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when people say that something is "overated" what do they mean by that???

Overrated means thinking too highly of something.


These are some definitions I got from the net:

1. To overestimate the merits of; rate too highly.

2. To have too high an opinion of

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who is singing the song in the new old navy commercial? she is a white brunette.

Ingrid Michaelson

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okay so i made a new myspace and i really want to promote my music and get discovered i want to advertise my myspace and like get friend requests and have people tell me what they think about it? whats the best way to do it. and if you guys want to tell me what you guys think heres my myspace. www.myspace.com/kittymusiic

You could ask one of your myspace friends to make a banner for you
like this one saying for people to ADD

http://img340.imageshack.us/img340/2134/banneree8.jpg

Then you can get friends to send it out in a bulliten for others to add

OR

If you dont want a banner ask people to post your URL in a bulliten for people to add


Hope this helps

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I am a mother of 5, with the two youngest being my step children, ages 14 and 12. My husband and I have the children full time with the exception of every other weekend, they spend with their mom. Ok this is the situation. I have been their step mom for ten years.I have watched them grow, have attended school functions, teacher parent conferences, school trips, all althletic functions, etc... The birth mom, we will call suzy, treats the two different. The oldest gets everything she askes for.. from clothes, shopping, weekend trips, etc.. The youngest gets an occasional shirt or small item. She is very angry at her mom and says things like I hate my mom, I hate my sister, my mom loves her more than me, my mom promises me things and never keeps her promises, etc.. I am becoming very concerned with her anger. I have done very well at keeping my mouth shut when it involves their mother. And I want the youngest to have her lime lit, to feel special, etc..However, I do not want to stoop to the level of their mother and include one in something special and not the other... We always include all 5 of our kids, no matter what we do..we always have..I just dont understand how a mother can put one child so much higher than the other...And she is hurting...I always insure her that she is loved just as equal and all the other children we have...But she always poses the question, "why does my mom love ____ more than me." I dont have an answer for her..My advide has always been, I can't answer for your mom, thats something you will have to ask her. Is there any suggestions to help me out in this situation? What more can I do? Am I giving her the wrong advice? Please help....Desperate step mom....

You could bring all of the children for a day out but spoil her in a way, you know just let her have fun and buy her some things just to let her know she is just as special as all of the others.
Buy her presents if she is good and do the same for the others if you are worried about leaving them out and not treating them fairly.

I would talk to your husband about it and she what he thinks, he might talk to the girls mum or maybe he might suggest you talk to her (which ever is better for you and the kids) and tell her what your step daughter has been saying and ask her why she treats her differently.

I can imagine it would be an awful situation to be in and upsetting but try and talk to her and her mother as much as possible and let her know that they are all loved equally by you and your husband even if their mother treats them both diffenrly.

I hope this helps a little.

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