I love books and I love to give advice to people when they ask me. I am very well spoken and i tell you the honest truth. i don't just tell you on a whim, I actually process your problem and see how i could help with it. Solving problems aka drama's is something I do constantly with my friends.
Member Since: March 8, 2009
Answers: 85
Last Update: December 10, 2009
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Why do I,&&alot of other people, look different in pictures then in the mirror?
What do we truly look like,
Tha mirrors image or the cameras?
I would think
the mirrors image is what we truly look
like because, when you see sum1 in person
and then look at that same person in a mirror,
they look the same.. right?
but,
I was reading stuff on google && alot of people
think the cameras more truthful because what
we see in the mirror is reversed..
Soo whats your opinion???
Srry just a curious young female tryin
to geta answer..haha ;] (link)
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not a problem. i believe that even the in the mirror your reversed but with a camera especially with people who know how to photoshop and twick up their images are fack, since if they don't like the way they look in the mirror they can't fix it but with a camera and a person who knows computers can.
hoped i helped
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Theres this guy that i've been crushing on since november. I'm a freshman and he's a junior. I always see him staring at me. During lunch especially. And also, during lunch, I sometimes see his friends turn around and look at me. One time on the lunch line, one of his friends look me straight in the eye with this sort of intese look and looked then away. And his friends are always being funny and making jokes when I see them. But I think they might always be like that. 3 of his friends shout and say random things to me too. lol
And when I see him look at me during lunch he looks for the longest time haha. And in the halls he looks at me too but i cant tell how long because i always look down. I see him a lot in the halls so maybe he just thinks i'm stalking him and thinks i'm weird. Is he interested in me? and why hasn't he talked to me?
Is it just my imagination? because i'm not really that pretty. I'm 14, 5'4" and 165lbs. I dont have terrible skin, but its not that great either. Is it just wishfull thinking? (link)
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honestly a lot of girls your age think that way of i'm not pretty and no guy would want me. but you know what if he keeps staring at you, and he hasn't made the move try making the move first. i mean the worse thing he could say is no.
when i was your age i didn't think that way either then i stopped to look at myself in the mirror and i said that i have my own natural beauty, no one looks the same especially when they are girls, a lot the pretty girls that you see around school they spend at least an hour on their appearences just to go to school. your are pretty just remember that true beauty comes from with in, and for this guy, if he doesn't like you at least you know but if he doesn't ask why they stare at you if you care at all if he say's no, if he say's yes ask him if he would like to go to the movies with you and a group of friends so this way he doesn't think your asking him out already.
hoped i helped you good luck
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My family doesnt allow me to have a boyfriend, but obviously me being a teenager i dont listen and do as i please! So last year i had a boyfriend and i had got caught with him; then i had to break up with him. After that my family had lost trust in me, and ive tried to gain it back. However this year i got another boyfriend, and my family did not approve, as he isnt the same colour as me! Yet again i have lost my families trust, but this time its major! My family think i have broke up with him, but i really havnt. I want to gain my trust back, but i dont know how to.. any ideas...? (link)
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Your family i don't know about them, but if it was my family and they lost trust in me because i got a boyfriend of a different race, i honestly wouldn't care, because it isn't like your going to marry him and if you are then shouldn't the love between you and him be the one thing your family should look at and forget the fact that he is a different race.
But if you really wish to gain trust then tell them what you feel, if of course you haven't tried that yet. this is because one it isn't there life to order about it is yours, and plus we are the boring generation we got to do something with our time before we all go old and have kids and do exactly the same thing to them as our parents did to us even though we all say we won't. do you understand this might be something that your family is just going to have to deal with depending on how old you are they can't touch you if your 17 to 18 years old because your an adult, if you below that age wait and when you turn those ages show them that this is your life and no one elses they can't control you forever.
i hoped i helped you good luck
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Hey im 17/f and im almost 18. (June 13th) My mom has started yelling at my for every little thing. I no longer have my cell phone or car. She constantly snoops through my myspace. I have to give her my password. She just doesnt give me my space. She reads my text messsages. I've told her to back off but she says i cant do anything until im 18. I have my own car i pay for it im on my own insurance i pay for gas plates etc. And she takes it away and she drives it sometimes when she doesnt have gas and doesnt even ask. Is that right? Can i take my car even though she told me not to. I mean i pay for it and everything. She just makes me so mad and theres no point in talking to her because she is very stubborn! Please help! (link)
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You are allowed to take your car since you paid for your car, it would be different if she paid for it but she didn't.
have you asked her why she is yelling at you all of a sudden out of nowhere. it might be because she thinks your doing something wrong and just feels the need to protect, trust me i know sometimes they take trust to far and won't let you do anything. you have to remember that when you are 18 she can't touch you, and plus it is your life, she also might just be upset over the fact that your going to college soon or leaving or something that makes mothers sad and tries to keep you with them, but how they do it makes us draw farther away in order to get the space that we need.
i don't believe that the until your 18 is true you can always do something about it, it just depends on what that is, you can't go to the police or anything but think about it, your car, your internet, your phone, does she have all of those things, look through her things go through her stuff and show her how overbearing and overprotecting and mostly just really annoying that is to know that some one is reading all of your messages using all of your gas and mostly taking advantage of you.
whatever it is that you think of try not to get the police involved you may not be one of those kids but you never really know.
p.s. these are suggestions you don't have to take them, you don't even have to care i am just here to give you the help that i think you need
hoped i helped you good luck
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Does anyone know where I can find the video of Daisy de la hoya singing the star spangled banner??? I cant seem to find it and I hear it was pretty aweful. just curiouse!!! (link)
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iknow this sounds obvious but have you tried youtube.com you can find almost anything on their. actually the only thing i found on youtube of her is her singing happy birthday and that was it. if is on the rock of love try looking the show up and then find the episode that has her singing the star spangled banner.
hoped i helped
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I'm 21/f.
Usually I'm the one answering these questions, but this is an issue I've had my whole life, no matter how hard I hit the gym, or how healthily I eat - My diet at the moment has been a bit off because I'm in my last couple of weeks of college, working three jobs, and occasionally can't find the time to eat anything substantial (so I either don't eat, or wind up having a handful of trail mix in the span of eight hours...it's bad, I know. I'm fixing it when I have time.)
My abs are flat and defined; my legs are fine. My butt is toned, my lower back is good - no love handles or anything. My upper back, I know how to fix, but haven't had the time. My forearms are fine.
I'm 5'4" and 120. When I have the time and can eat, I run, lift weights, etc.
My upper arms are the ONLY place on my body where I have squeezable fat. I've had it my whole life, it drives me crazy, and it makes me look incredibly broad-shouldered. I'm a pretty small person, so this is kind of annoying.
I've done pushups, bar curls, curls, tricep extensions, skull crushers, dips, military press, overhead press, all sorts of exercises. I've done full-body fat burning exercise routines, too. I gain muscle, but my arms never shrink.
My biceps are pretty toned. My triceps are all right - those aren't the problem - it's further up, and includes my shoulders. Lats, too, probably. I know how to work those, too, but the place where I have the most fat doesn't seem to surround any muscles...I can't feel it when I work out arms, shoulders, lats, back, or anything.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
Does anyone have any ideas as to how to fix this? I'd like to be able to wear cute shirts without feeling like my shoulders are too broad.
Thanks in advance! (link)
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Well see your arms my have muscle and no matter if your thin or not your still going to have flabby arms. it is just the way it is. even the most tinies girls who look like a tooth pick and work out like mad to tone their body still have flabby arms.
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okay so i hooked up with this guy tyler after meeting him twice and acctually talking to him and chillin with him once, and we had an [amazing] one night stand, lol. so we acted like a couple for a couple days [the one day prior and 2 days or so after] until we got into a fight because he didnt want to date me so we were pissed at eachother then things evened out , now im pregnant with him kid...he knows and he never really said he wanted to be there or anything but he says things that imply it. A bit before he found out i was pregnant he started to act like he liked me again , but im not sure, so basicly i want to be with him but idk if he wants to be with me ... what are some ways to try to show him im still the same person he met and liked ?
btw im 14/f
hes 17/m
:)
thanks for any help (link)
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Try doing the things that you did before you got pregnant depending on how far along you are you might not even show so you can still be that girl you used to be.
most guys especially teenagers fear about the girl that they had sex with is pregnant, but once the baby is born they look like the father. it is like the old saying goes. that a women is a mother when the baby is concived and in their tummies and a man is a father when he looks down upon his child and holds it.
i hoped i helped you.
p.s. if you were hyper still be that mostly be the girl you were before you got pregnant.
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I own alot of jackets. But my old abercrombie and fitch jacket got stretched out at the bottom. And I loveee it(: But its all stretched and is there anyway at all besides tying it up I can make it like un baggy? Thannnks! (link)
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i know that things tend to shrink once you put it inthe dryer, have you tried that? But the thing is you have to wash it then dry it. if none of that works then i think you just have to go find another one.
hoped i helped you
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I can't seem to be able to let anyone in. As soon as anyone gets close to knowing me, or in anyway just close to me, I push them away. How do I stop shutting people out. I don't talk the person I consider my bestfriend really. I'm a listener not a talker. Theres no use in complaining about my problems, it doesnt do anything. I just want to be able to get close to someone, anyone. How do I do this? (link)
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don't worry a lot of people have this with others. they don't like to let poeple in because something happened to them when they were growing up and they don't want it to happen again.
i suggest that you go slow when meeting someone don't let them walk all over you or go to fast. tell them that you may have to find time to work on letting them into your life this doesn't have to be a boyfriend it can be anyone even a dog perhaps if that is one as well. don't talk to the dog just kinda go slow when your around people. again don't worry a lot of other people on the planet have trust issues or they are just afraid of letting someone in because they are afraid of being hurt again and they believe that they can't handle that.
hoped i helped you.
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Hello,
I'm a 26-year-old male. I'm 5'5" and weigh 300 pounds. I live at home with my parents and I have no job. My daily activities consist primarily of eating, sleeping and smoking cigars. My hygiene is terrible. I shower maybe twice a week, brush my teeth once a month, don't shave and my wardrobe consists of a t-shirt with food stains, a pair of mesh shorts and sneakers with holes in them.
I wasn't always this way. While I was never Mr. confident, I was able to participate in a variety of activities growing up. As a kid, I took swimming lessons, trumpet lessons and played several hours of basketball a day. In high school, I acted in eighteen theater productions and was a member of the football and bowling teams. I was a good student and upon graduating, I enrolled at the University of Maryland at College Park.
I wasn't overly excited about continuing my education at college, however. I didn't apply to any schools until my father really got on me about it, screaming at the top of his lungs. I guess I wanted to take a year off to consider my options. I also wanted to try my hand at being a professional actor. Though it's a tough business to break into, I know people that did and I was quite good at it. It had become my passion. Looking back, I suppose I should have gotten a part-time job, tried my hand at acting and if need be, go to college later.
Instead, I went to college right away. Despite being part of some high school activities, I am rather shy (ironic, given my ability to perform on stage) and I never really made too many friends. I had some trouble with the roommates I was assigned as well and returned home following my first semester 55 pounds heavier.
I lost the weight when I developed a crush on this girl. The weight loss was unintentional. I just got so nervous thinking about her, I couldn't eat. I allowed this crush to go on too long without making my feelings known. Rather than get to know her better, my mind started imagining what she'd be like (all things I'd like of course!) and so my crush deepened. I was drawn to her confidence, something I lacked. I was so lonely and lost, perhaps I was looking to her to save me.
Needing to pick a major, I chose Marketing. I didn't really know much about it. It's just that the business school was well-respected and I was also steered toward it by my parents as well. The truth is, I didn't know what I wanted to do or be. I was supposed to figure it out those first two years and I never did.
In 2003 I suffered a mental breakdown. Over time, I had become increasingly bitter and angry. I began hating people. Then one day, feeling very angry and lonely, I snapped. I proceeded to fall apart in a very bad way. I began smoking cigarettes and cigars. I stopped going to class, stopped studying. The friends I had abandoned me. And so, it got to a point where I never left my apartment. I ordered food to be delivered three to four times a day, all junk, including a pint of Ben & Jerry's just about every night. I sat on the couch and smoked a pack and a half a day, leaving the butts on the ground outside on the balcony. It got to a point where there were so many cigarette butts on the floor, they doubled as carpeting.
I also developed several phobias, including a germ phobia. I couldn't open doors with my hand. Whenever someone sneezed, I'd hold my breath until I could leave the area. As a kid, I was always a bit obsessive-compulsive (e.g., having to name everything object in the room before I could watch TV) but this breakdown made it all worse.
I was living to die basically. I am not a religious person and so I didn't have religion to hang on to. I began asking why. Why am I here? What is the point? I figured that whatever I do doesn't matter because in the end I will die. Even if I impact someone else's life along the way, in the end, they will die. So, is life simply about packing in as much fun as you can before your time is up? What if you're like me and you no longer enjoy doing things? I wished I was dead. I knew I couldn't take my own life and so I focused on how sad I was that I had been born in the first place.
I beat up a 13-year-old kid who was successfully ripping into me with an onslaught of digs and insults. I was so determined not be bullied, not to take shit from anyone that I lost control. On several occasions, I lashed out at one of my teachers because we didn't see eye to eye.
There was some thought that perhaps my inability to avoid being overcome with this uncontrollable rage might be a result of two concussions that I suffered, one in high school and one in college. It could also explain why my OCD and mild depressive moods that I had as a kid got worse.
(As a kid, I ran away from home a lot and also begged my dad to kill me)
Moving on...
Returning home with a college degree after seven years of going at it, I couldn't land a job. I had a marketing degree but it turns out I didn't really like marketing and my major GPA was terrible anyway. I tried getting a job as a reinsurance accountant because I interned as one and its what my dad does but the lack of an accounting degree proved problematic. Though it's not supposed to factor into their decision, I would not be surprised if my weight also kept me from being hired.
So, here's the thing:
1) I don't know what I can do for a living
2) I don't enjoy very many activities
3) I'm not really interested in the American dream lifestyle
4) I can't afford to see a mental health professional
5) I'm unable to go to crowded places (i.e., the mall, the movies)
6) I'm too afraid to work with strangers
7) I have no friends
8) I'm slowly killing myself with tobacco, over eating and lack of activity
9) I can't let go of the past and stop regretting all of my mistakes
10) I have no work history to put on a resume
11) I've overwhelmed with guilt and feelings of worthlessness
12) I lack something I want, something I can use as motivation
I figure my time is running out. I'll either die from cancer or a heart attack. I certainly allowed myself to have many cavities and receding gums. This may be my last chance.
I need suggestions. I need ideas for what I can do as a start. How do I make a fresh start? Heh, can I give myself amnesia so all the problems go away?
(link)
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well first of all change your rutine of shower and hygen. go shopping find a job it doesn't have to be big it isn't go to help if you think that you really rather not work at fast food restuarants because at least it is work.
find a small apartment that doesn't cost much and move out of your parents house if that is what you wish. if your still in college go to the career centure and tell them your into acting and want to be a pro at it, they may be able to help you. i mean come on their there for a reason right?
hoped i help you good luck
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So my friend thinks shes pregnant..
If she is.. she needs to get an abortion..
how much is that? and is there any other way of "killing" it
without like going to the doc for an abortion?
i feel so bad :[
there is no way.. like she cant keep the baby
its gonna ruin her life and her boyfriends life.
like seriously her parents will kick her out and his parents will kick my out too..
and she cant get planB because she has 0 money :[
(link)
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hello, i am not going to argue with the other advice columnist, i am just going to give an opnion on what she should do,
abortion is bad because the baby is alive before they kill it, the baby won't ruin anyone's life because she can actually have the baby and give it up for adoptions, couples who are wanting a baby and can't search for one pregnant teen who just can't handle it, or is afraid of the parents. if you saw the movie juno it is just like that she won't even have to visit the baby she'll give it to a family who will take care of it.
okay if your friend really wants this abortion here is a website with the cost and other info that she may want to know.
http://www.costhelper.com/cost/health/abortion.html
hopefully she hasn't killed it or gave birth yet for my advice. i really hoped i helped you
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thanks soo much if you read this i really need help =/
(im 16 hes 17 we're both juniors)
so a few nights ago me and my boyfriend had this huge like 3 hour talk. he lost his motivation to do like anything because his depression is kicking in again and he said he saw someone about it and asked why it was coming back because he thought that his life was going really good and they said he had to much stressors in his life like his school, sports, parents and girlfriend. he told me that i couldn't relate to what his parents were going through because my parents aren't divorced but then i told him that it doesn't matter and that you just need someone to help you get through it and it doesnt matter if they can relate or not. which he knows i completely would do whatever it takes to help him. then he was saying how he found "the one" way to early in life because we've been dating for 8 months now. (we're 17, juniors) and you're suppose to find them after college. and then i told him he was planning way to far ahead and that we're not even seniors yet and something might happen and as much as i want us to, we might not even last until then to stop planning so far ahead...so like i don't know what to do, i think the best thing for him would be for me to break up with him until he can get his life together but i'm worried that will just make him even more depressed because he told me he's so scared of love and definetly does not throw it around and he said he's 100% positive that he loves me, and i love him soo much, i actually cried the whole last night at even the thought of having to break up with him..but then again like his lack of motivation is downing me too because i understand his problem but he never wants to do anything anymore and i feel that im always the one trying to get ahold of him and he never calls me, so its not good for only one person in a relationship to be fighting...i don't know..please help. (link)
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you call him and he doesn't pick up. then if you know where he lives and i am sure you do, then go to his house and bang on the door asking to see him.
if one of his parents which ever house he is at say's no, don't take that just tell them that it is a emergency or barge in demanding that you talk to him. if you break up with it might get worse but it might help him if your one of his stress points tough love helps sometimes not all the time though.
ask him if he thinks your one of his problems and if you are then casually without making it worse for him say you need time apart for you to get better that is only if you one of the stress factors. if your not don't be controlling just say that you really want to help him out.
hoped i helped
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it may be something you cant do or say to change but it still hurts and when your friend dosen't seem like he wants to be friends anymore you wanna question why and you want awnsers but people grow apart and theres nothing you can do about it so...what should you do when somone you believed in suddenly goes Awall and decides he dosent care about the friendshipp and dosent care enough to talk to you or tell you what's going on so you decide to confront him and tell him that mabey the friendship we had for over a year is now over you do this because you cant stand to be pushed aside for the popular girls and you cant really decide if he's worth fighting for soo you be the bigger person and end the friendship Its not that you have fallen for your bff its just that your not used to being deserted by somone you cared so much aboutni guess my question is....did you make the right move and how Are you able to cope (link)
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like you said people grow apart and you just can't help that. but you have to decide, honestly. is this person really worth your time if they deserted you?
here is what i did, when someone pushed me aside because that person thought i said something bad when it was only a opinion. i asked them what they were mad at me for and then i at least tried to explain what happened and why i said it. but it didn't work and so i believed that that person just wasn't suppose to be my friend at all. coping with the loss of a friend is hard don't get me wrong it is just if that friend drops you or disses you or whatever are they really worth the fight? i am sorry but this is all i can give you because sometimes other people can't decide for you, you have to decide.
hope i didn't offend you or make it sound like i am insulting you because that wasn't what i was trying to do, what i am trying to do is saying that since he dumped you for the popular crowd then he really isn't your friend he was probably using you to get to them and he really isn't worth the time. But you decide and see if i'm right if so pretend like you never knew him and move on.
hoped this helped.
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I'm running for my class council for school. The class council coordinates prom and pep rally activities. I've been the secretary for three years and i need some cute campaign ideas to keep my office. We can't bake anything and we can only bring store-packaged items. I'm doing posters but i want to be unique and memorable. Any ideas? (link)
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maybe you could bring out some old photo's from the proms before and make a poster of that, or cheerleader pom poms and then put come to the pep rally, i would go around campus and ask people what they thought of last years prom or prep rallies and put their quotes on the poster.
hoped i helped.
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I need help figuring out a few ideas that are not costly.
I have opened a new charity and need some inexpensive fund raising ideas. It has cost me out of pocket too much already so I have to watch expenses or I'll go broke.
I also need a few local volunteers to distribute paper materials and live in the Atlanta, Ga area.
You can contact me regarding this position at:
hopeforhelpless@ymail.com (link)
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i can only help with the idea's part becsause i don't live in Atlanta. so, here are somethings that you can do, Bake sale, library gathering for an author to read there book, a get together, a walk athon.
i hoped this helped. they aren't expensive but a little time consuming.
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i need the perfect song for 2 boys and a girl in a trio.. the girl is having her debutante ball in 2 weeks and we need the perfect song.. preferably a recent pop song, not too mushy or slow.. a song that's fun but very MEANINGFUL suitable for the bday girl.. (link)
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I'm not so sure on what songs would be good for a trio.. that hasn't been recorded already, i know this sounds like work which honostly i know sucks, but what i would if you really need songs for a trio i would look at the A*teens they have four people and can make it work, along with a bunch of country artist like rascal flatts,little big town, or look on the cmt channel depending whether or not you have cable. channel 51 for cable.
since not a lot of pop artist have trio's unless their making a cd with someone else i would look at the country spots.
hoped i helped you.
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all of that "nonsense" that Korn has as lyrics... in songs like "twist"... what is that?? (link)
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i believe that they are talking about the rappers and how they aren't very good so they should stop. this is a guess because then they start to make up words.
sorry hoped i helped you a little bit.
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so i guess the title for this question wasnt a very nice one haha but it got you reading it. well i do love my boyfriend to death we have been dating for 6 months. im 16 hes 15. theres just a few small problems. everything will be going fine, then sudenly a few weeks ago he wanted to take a break. all the lovey dovey stuff stopped n he really didnt seem to care about me anymore. well now we are back together and all the lovey dovey stuff has started again. he says he loves me more than anything. thats what he said before the breakup too. most days he is great and i love him so much. i couldnt imagine being with another guy. but some days he is in the worst mood and he will practically ignore me. i really try to help him out and i put up with so much stuff just for him. he is very outgoing so its not like him to be quiet and i always think its something i did. but he gets in different moods all the time. is he bipolar? he acts completely normal other than the mood swings and is captain of the football and lax team. hes popular and a really funny guy. but he also has told me that he hears voices in his head. he doesnt act like its a big deal and yesterday a voice told him to jump off a building. he obviously didnt listen haha but he doesnt act like his mental problems effect him much but the break and his mood swings make me think maybe they do. i dont want him to start listening to these voices in his head or go crazy one day. and i dont want his bipolar watever you want to call it mood swings, to effect are relationship either. i know he has suffered from depression and possibly still is. but he acts like hes the happiest guy in the world. you would never guess. does he have schizophrenia or bipolar or something else? any advice? (link)
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He might be bipoler or he is just having a rough year. i would talk about to him and dicuss what is going on in your relationship. Knowing that your not waisting your time is always a good thing. If he has suffered from depression figure out what that is unless you already know then just ask him to talk about it. okay don't pressure him into talking just suggest it and if wishes to talk he will. but for right now i would slowly try to figure out what is wrong ask his friends family and piece it all together.
Good luck hoped i helped you.
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http://www.prom-hairstyles.us/images/028.jpg
what kind of flowers are those? :]
im doing my hair like that for prom and im thinking about doing the flower thing too. (link)
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i believe they are lilies i am not really sure.
i also believe that they are tulips but that isn't right.
hoped i helped.
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I really need advice about my singing voice. I aspire to be a performer one day, but I'm so not prepared with my vocals. here's a video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hrKfAfpPmP0
^check out the link...
and you can look at the other ones on my account if needed.
I just need to know what I need to adjust (in general)
like I need to cut-off notes better and calm down with the vibratto...but tell me more. thank you! (link)
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Actually i would say your very good at this so good luck with the prefoming live. okay you go fast when it a very slow song and i can understand nerves make things worse so just calm down next time second your voice is beautiful it isn't like kelly's or martina's what i am saying is some singers can't do high notes so just go with what your lungs can handle.
I noticed that your reading off the screen which isn't bad you need to know the lyrics, but this song is very sad and depressing i would put a little more emotion not only in your voice but in your facial features as.
Well i believe what makes a good artist is when they actually feel something for the song they sing you don't have to cry on stage or nothing just put a little more of my boyfriend or friend or parent or whatever broke up with me, left me, or died something around there.
Your voice is very beautiful, and it is a bass which means that you can only go so high with the high notes but don't fret you'll get better once you get older and sing to a lot of different song's i would sing to celine dion, martina, leeann rimes people who hit the high notes and pratice your lungs to hit those to where you don't look like your about to collaspe from the lack of air.
If you really want to be a singer when you get older and preform on stage i would go to camps or get a singing tutor or go into go into you chore classes at school.
i don't want this to sound like critism, because it isn't your talented not a lot of people have great voices not even professional singers do, they have to use the sound boards in order to make them sound good. i am just trying to get your dream going good luck.
hoped this helped.
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