I am on here to help people because that is what I want to do with the rest of my life and I feel like I give good advice. I hope I help everyone I write to.
Gender: Female
Age: 19
Member Since: February 20, 2008
Answers: 204
Last Update: February 22, 2011
Visitors: 14191
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26, male.
I've been with my girlfriend for five years. And lately, it just feels like we're killing each other slowly. And she has high hopes about us getting married. But I'm currently unemployed, and struggling just to get back out there. Throw in my low self-esteem, and other issues between us like religion, our families, and it's just so damn hard.
She almost walked out on me crying because she felt stupid for waiting for me. I managed to talk her down, and we're still together. But looking back, a part of me feels like she really would be better off without me.
I always look at my relationships as things to continue working on and trying to make work to the very end. Is it wrong that I keep trying to make this relationship work, or am I being selfish for not wanting to let her go? (link)
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You are not wrong. Relationships are meant to be worked on and if you both still have feelings there is no reason to stop working. What you might want to do to make things better is to take a short break to sort yourself out.
You know you need to get back out into the working world and I understand how hard it could be to get there with low self esteem but go to a therapist. Work on bettering yourself so when you and your girl get back together she can have the best of you and most importantly all of you. When you feel good about yourself and where you are going with your life all relationships will work better.
I tell you this from experience and I hope it helps and makes your relationship better if you choose to follow through with my advice.
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so thers a theory that the world is gonna end on december 21, 2012. i know that the mayans predicted this,but how come people think its gonna end? they said its something about a winter solstice, but what does that mean?
can someone explain to me how the world is gonna end or why it is cause im curious about this.
thanks! (link)
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they didn't predict it, their calender just ends that day. It could mean many things. Most likely it means they were lazy and didn't finish it.
My dad told me about a cool theory about that day being when someone invents time travel and uses it so the world is actually going in a loop and doesn't actually end.
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Okay, so im a freshman at college, and i still feel like a high schooler, because im so insecure. i always think every other girl is prettier then me, and that has caused problems with me and my boyfriend (we have been together for 2 years) but im alaways scared wen he has a girl friend, that he will like her because she is prettier then me, or more fun then me, because i feel llike IM SO BORING AND NOTT OUT GOiNG enough, so the advice i need is how to boost my self esteem and try and have a better personality i wanna be outgoing and fun to be around! and i just hate being jelouse!!! (link)
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I just wanted to say...I feel the same way!! Atleast about the school thing and I did about the relationship thing. The only way I got over it was with time! My bf knew I hated what I was doing and was having a hard time figuring out how to change it and I think that is what gave me the time to figure it out. I think if you tell your bf that you are trying to figure this out and that it is very hard for you and ask politely if you could try to deal with it for awhile he might give you enough time and enough incentive for you to know that you don't have to worry about that.
The reason I cannot give you much advice on how to raise your self esteem is because I honestly don't know. I am still struggling with it and I think I will my whole life. I encourage you to try many different things and I really hope you firgure it out.
I know I probably didn't help but I just wanted you to know that I feel the same way you do!
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Alright well Im 15 and I drink and smoke. Well I have had sex with 12 people already. A few of them I really liked and most of them I was drunk. And I know thats not an excuse. But Ive been fucked over so many times by guys. Like I dont have any emotions anymore. But I can like name all of tthe people I did have sex with. But I still feel like im a slut and I dont want to be a slut or feel like one. Most of the time when im in a relationship I feel like I have to have sex with them. Or they keep bugging/begging me and I cave in sometimes. So Idk what to do. (link)
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you don't want to be that way, you need to make the decision to change it. you need to work on growing your self-esteem. no girl needs a guy or sex to define them. take this opportunity to learn about yourself and know what you want and don't want. It is not bad to like sex but you don't need to give any guy any part of you.
Please learn about yourself, It kills me when I think of a girl (especially your age)thinking the way you do. never ever ever let anyone or anything define you...you define yourself!
hope I helped...if you decide to take my advice but need more just ask!
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Well, this may be a bit embarrassing, but here goes. I'm 17/f Lately I have had this weird feeling when I pee. It is similar to burning, but it's a bit sharper. It comes on right after I'm finished peeing and it feels like it goes all the way from my urethra up to behind my clitoris. Since this started, I have been feeling like I really need to pee more often than is normal, but when I go to the bathroom, not very much urine actually comes out.
I'm a virgin, so I know it's not an STD. I have been taking birth control pills though (for hormonal issues, not birth control.) for about the past month.
I know that you guys aren't doctors, but I was wondering if anyone has ever experienced this or has an idea of why it's happening and how I can treat it. Thank you so much. (link)
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yep it is a uti. they suck! You should figure out what caused it and try to cut down on it...it could be baths or a certain body wash you use. Believe me go into the doctor now before it get worse cuz believe me it will feel like you are going to die if you don't get rid of it now!!
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so me and my boyfriend are going to have sex i know it. but i'm afraid it will be awkward because we have the cute loving kissy type of relationship. i usually never have boyfriends and i'm pretty sexual so this is different for me. i like him a lot...
so my question is how can i make it not awkward during sex? (link)
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I don't think you will think about it. I think that if you are really turned on it wouldn't matter...I was worried about that my first time but it didn't really even cross my mind when it was going on.
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Ikno its wrong but everytime i eat i feel likei need 2 sleep
I Dont sleep RIGHT AWAYT someties i wait a half hour sometimes 20 minutes then igo take a nap...is it bad? i heard u could gain fat.
But i workout everyday
im not trying to lose weight btw
i just dont want to gain.
I work out everydayy so yeah could it affect anything? thanks. (link)
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I think that if you are sleepy every time it could just mean you are eating too much...I might be wrong but maybe make a journal and see if you are...you might be gaining a little but I think you working out will get rid of that. I think you are fine as long as you are ok with sleeping everytime
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okay so on august 20th me and my boyfriend almost had unprotected sex, my first time. i was about to stick it in, and it kinda just got the tip in. then i took it out because we had no protection. it was not in the whole way, and was hardly in at all, like maybe 1/4 of the tip was in. i'm 9 days late for my period and i'm so scared i'm pregnant. i'm 14 years old and i can't have a baby right now. my period is usually late but has never been this late before. it wasn't sex, and he's not even sure if he pre cumed or not. i read online that if you masturbated and then pee'd there is little sperm in your pre cum. he masturbated that morning and peed before it happened. what is the possibility that i can be pregnant. i haven't had morning sickness or anything, i feel normal exept for my breasts hurt but they always do before i'm getting my period. could i have an infection or something? on October 5th i lost my virginity but we used protection and it only lasted like 30 seconds because it hurt so bad, and he didn't finish, and the condom didn't break. is it usual that my periods this late? help me i really need advice and answers!
thank you so much! (link)
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If he only stuck it in and barely you are more than likely not pregnant. I don't know anyone that can pre cum that fast and from that little of stimulation.
you can get pregnant from even a small tiny pin prick hole in a condom. even if you cannot see it it doesn't mean it wasn't there so really just to be save take a test.
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Me & my g/f are thinking bout having sex. i wanna fuck her really bad, but I'm scared about getting her pregnent. She sayz she take birth control, but its only for her periods. Does that still work to stop her from getting pregnent?
We talk about it some and like she said that if I'm scared, we can just do it while she is on her period. If we do that, she won't get pregnent right? Its not too messy is it? Should I like nut on her stomach?
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She takes BC to help her periods that doesn't mean it isn't only helping that. If you are really afraid you should proably not do it on her period because before and after is when a girl is most fertile so you cannot be for sure that it will work. For most girls BC works just make sure she is taking it every day like she is supposed to.
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ok i been going out wit my boyfriend for a yr and 2 months.
but now he left to the dominican republic..nd everytime i call him he is never there.i dont know what to think,sometimes i think that he is just cheeting on me.because his brother got a myspace and he cheks it every 4 days,then why cant my boyfriend do that and ask why did i called or something..?
omg im confuse nd sad please give me some really good advice,thank you (link)
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He probably is just busy. Why don't you ask his brother what is going on? You never know he might just be out making friends and seeing whats out there. There are many reasons for a boy to not call you back. Just make sure you don't jump to conclusions and make him angry. Long distance relationships are hard.
I hope I helped!
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Me & my boyfriend had sex.
I've been on my Birth Control for about 2 years now. I put a spermicide in me, the contraceptive films, and he got off in me.
I'm having to take antibiotics because I have a really bad infection, and antibiotics, suposidly kills birth control.
I just started taking it, a day after the sex though.
I took my pill to start my period sunday night.
So basically what my questions are...
Where the antibiotics kills birth control, will it also stop me from starting my period?
When your pregnant, will you ALWAYS miss your first period.
Thanks.
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You do not always miss your first period. Some woman have it all the way through pregnancy.
I don't think there is an antibiotic that would stop you from having your period but you might want to look the antibiotic up on the net, see what the side effects are.
Sadly I can't give you a straight out answer about feeling all that. It could be the birth control or it could be something else. I'm sorry I can't help you with that. the only way you will know is to do research and maybe take a pregnancy test.
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Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 6 months now. And i love him to death. He just does so many things that upset me. I went on vacation and he went to the club, when he knows how i feel about that. He'll invite me over then drive his friends around untill 4:00 in the morning. He barelly ever says nice things about me or to me, but he comments on every other girl. He wont talk to me when im trying to have a serious conversation. He never calls me back when he says hes going too. But.. He does things i like. He can make me smile when im sad, i love the way he holds me, and watches movies with me. I love how he cute he is. But honestly i dont think im happy with him. I know i have to do whats best for me. But i really do love him and i cant let him go. What do i do. Please help me. (link)
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Ok... I have a friend in a similar situation.
You need to do what you think is right. You obviously want to get rid of him right now and I think it would be a good idea. I know you may love him but sometimes to get what you really need in a relationship you have to let him go. He needs to know the reasons and he needs to know that you love him but you can't be with him when he is this way. It might be asking him to change but sometimes things have to change if you are to be happy. If you can't live with what he is doing it has to change or you have to move on.
Hopefully if you do break up with him he realizes what he was doing wrong and changes it so that you can be completely in love with him not just mostly in love with him!
hope I helped, good luck
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14/f
okay. just a warning, i have been known to freak out and worry about nothing.
well. about 2 years ago, i noticed a strange growth-feeling on my chest. but my mom checked it out and she assured me that it was nothing. and sometimes i get pains in my chest. but i did notice that this "growth" or whatever is on the side of my chest where my one breast is bigger, so i am assuming that it is a gland (is right on my brestbone, on the side) or something involving that? keep in mind that two years ago i had no boobs, k? lol. well sometimes i get a real bad pain there, so i get scared that it might be cancer.
later i got real bad headaches. like, basically the same kind of pain only all in different places on my head and only for like 2 seconds and then they'd go away. i noticed this also about 2 years ago. and when i wear my glasses they stop. but occaisionally when i dont they come back. but anyways, i figured that if it was cancer by now i'd be dead :)
so basically, do you think that it is cancer? like i said, im pretty sure that if ive had it for 2 years, id be dead by now. i just worry so much. thank you. (link)
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I am sorry to say this but cancer can attack your body for years without you even knowing. I am not saying you have it but maybe you want to tell your mom you are really scared and you want it to get checked out.
The headaches thing I think has nothing to do with cancer. If it goes away when you put your glasses on that just means you have bad eyesight. When you don't where your glasses you have to concentrate more on what you are looking at causing headaches. So don't really worry about that one.
I really hope I helped and I am sorry if I scare you.
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Okay So my last peirod was like June the 20th i think. I still havn't had one since!!! I am still a virgin i swear. But what's going on I know i'm not pregnant so whats up with my body? (link)
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Have you been more active lately or have you changed your diet or have you been more stressed than usual? All these things can affect your period. Many girls periods skip every once in a while but maybe you should talk to a doctor because if there is anything wrong you need to know as soon as possible.
It is probably nothing but it's better to make sure.
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I am very against smoking. I have asthma and it bothers me. I'm also afraid of getting secondhand smoke. If I live with smokers, but they never smoke inside the building, can this affect my health in any way? Is it only dangerous if you're inhaling smoke? Thanks!! (link)
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I'm thinking it may be able to harm you if you like hug them right after they smoke. Some of the "stuff" (I don't really know how to explain it) may be on their clothes.
If you do end up living with them just tell them your feelings on it. Make sure they know that you aren't judging them though. That would really suck to live with. Ask them if they can respect your choice, I am sure they will oblige, besides you will probably not be in your dorm a whole lot when they are. Your life is super busy in college.
Hope I helped!
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Okay so
Me and my boyfriend are sexually active, but rarely. The times we do have sex we're ALWAYS protected.
The condom has never busted or anything like that... but I have a question.
Is it normal for periods to be 1-2 weeks late every once in awhile? I'm 18 years old... and I don't know I always have scares like this, I guess I'm just paranoid... but I've been getting the faint stomach pains that always come before my period.. but it's just not coming and i don't understand why. We probably had sex either right after my last period came or right before... I can't exactly remember, but either why it was about a month and a week or something ago.
So is this normal?
Please give me all the advice you can. (link)
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ok I know all the others say don't worry but if I were you I would atleast take a prego test just in case.
My period was only 4 days late and I had the pains and everything and I took a test and found out I was prego. I also think the time you would could get prego is around your period.
It may be nothing but I would check if I were you!
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ok so me and this one guy both like each other and have gotten very attached. The thing is, is that I am 15, and he is 18. I have kept him a secret for awhile, but I recently told my mother. She said it would be alright to hangout with him as long as my parents were home and the situation was controlled. My mom doesn't want me getting pregnant, she was 17 when had a baby, so she doesn't wanting it happening to me. And this guy who i like, he isn't intrested in sex til marriage and he's very good about things, doesn't get into trouble, very nice person. But how I am going to explain this to my dad? And I guess how would i basically continue or build a better relationship on this? Like if he were to come over, how would we be able to make out or etc? Cause my parents would be over. I hate age difference, but it's all going to change, cause he's going to a nearby college. (link)
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well I am sure also that your parents just need to realize that he is a good guy. It is very hard to trust someone who is dating a girl that is pretty young especially because you are probably under the age of consent. I am sure your parents are looking out for you in more ways than one.
Don't let your parents discourage you from letting your relationship go forward. Also if he keeps coming over and showing your parents how good of a guy he is they might trust you enough to let him come over without them there. Or when you are the age of consent they might lighten up!
Just be patient, until your parents trust him!
Good luck!
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This a weird thing to ask sorry, but i just shaved"down there" if it normal to be all itchy at first? (link)
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oh yes it is normal and it kinda sucks but it gets better. remember to use shaving gel to keep the itching to a minimal.
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umm im a 17/f & over the last few days i've been smoking. & i drank a little bit of alcohol butt hat was one day. well i was wondering in TExas before u get your driver's license do they drug test you? iumm and also i've been smoking for 4 days & one day i smoked 3 cigarettes. so how long does it stay in your body? k please help me kthnxbye. (link)
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I think it stays in your system for 2 weeks. I have never heard of any drug tests for license's. if you have been smoking marijuana I think it takes about a month. Look in you manual they might have something in there. Also look up this thing...it's like a drink or a pill that cleans out your system of the drugs, that is if they do test.
just do some research and see.
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Me and my best friend austin are very close friends.
We do everything together. We used to go to the amusement park like everyday for the past 3 summers until he got a job there. he promised he wouldnt but did anyway.
Me and him always used to argue though because we were so close i think. It bothered me alot. But I still cared about him. However, one day at school I got pissed because he was saying how i always talk about myself (maybe because he was my first best friend). I'm not too social, and he helped me become a better person and i learned alot from him. That day that he said that I got really mad, I transfered schools, and then dropped out the end of my junior year in highschool. It is now my junior yr summer, and I have adult ed in the fall. Since hes been working we havent talked much. Me and him didnt go to the amusement park like we used to not once yet. We planned for it one day, but i decided to go car shopping instead.. I felt like he was going to be better than me, or have something that i want. maybe I'm insecure about myself I'm not sure.
I always feel like we are competing against each other. Weather it's who works out more, who has more muscle, who gets their license first, or even who has a nicer shirt. I feel like I'm jealous of him. Alot of people dont know I am, but I am. I think this is whats holding me back from hanging out with him. He's my best friend though, but maybe were too alike?? I feel alone he was like my only close friend. I only have aquaintances really. I want this jealousy to end. and this competeing.
I want it to be like it used to be.
For some reason I like it when I seem better than my friends is this normal??
I got him to work out, and to run, and to buy hollister clothes and everything cool looking, and he did, and now its like affecting the way i feel about myself
Pleasse give any advice
NY152! (link)
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well I myself do feel this way sometimes. But it's never been that bad to the point where I get upset, so I kept it in.
Maybe you can try having a deep conversation with him. I know that, that might be hard for two guys but maybe you have that kind of relationship. Tell him exactly how you feel and see if you can't figure out the reason why. Maybe he feels the same way as you.
If that doesn't help you might need to move on. People change and grow apart. I have lost many friends to this and it sucks a lot but it is life and sometimes it is not worth the pain to continue with the friendship!
I hope you figure this out.
Cassiopea
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