Me and my boyfriend have been dating for 6 months now. And i love him to death. He just does so many things that upset me. I went on vacation and he went to the club, when he knows how i feel about that. He'll invite me over then drive his friends around untill 4:00 in the morning. He barelly ever says nice things about me or to me, but he comments on every other girl. He wont talk to me when im trying to have a serious conversation. He never calls me back when he says hes going too. But.. He does things i like. He can make me smile when im sad, i love the way he holds me, and watches movies with me. I love how he cute he is. But honestly i dont think im happy with him. I know i have to do whats best for me. But i really do love him and i cant let him go. What do i do. Please help me.
Cassiopea answered Tuesday August 12 2008, 12:33 am: Ok... I have a friend in a similar situation.
You need to do what you think is right. You obviously want to get rid of him right now and I think it would be a good idea. I know you may love him but sometimes to get what you really need in a relationship you have to let him go. He needs to know the reasons and he needs to know that you love him but you can't be with him when he is this way. It might be asking him to change but sometimes things have to change if you are to be happy. If you can't live with what he is doing it has to change or you have to move on.
Hopefully if you do break up with him he realizes what he was doing wrong and changes it so that you can be completely in love with him not just mostly in love with him!
hope I helped, good luck [ Cassiopea's advice column | Ask Cassiopea A Question ]
ellegirl606 answered Monday August 11 2008, 8:35 pm: Sorry, but I don't understand how you can "love this guy to death". I know everyone's relationships are different than the next, but there is nothing special about this guy that another guy can't give you. It seems like you like having the boyfriend figure (someone to cuddle and spend time with), but it's just the wrong guy. I bet it's the same with him too, he just likes having someone around for intimacy but doesn't want to deal with the deeper connection. But... he's nothing special. He doesn't do anything positive in your life; instead, he makes you feel bad about yourself (by hitting on other girls, not paying attention to you and ignoring you when it comes down to the serious things), which is a total red flag. You should NEVER be with someone who makes you feel bad. Plus, saying things like "but he does this.." are NOT excuses! Nobody deserves that kind of treatment.
You need to do what's best for you and leave him. Let him know why you're leaving, and go. If you have brought these issues to attention before and he still hasn't changed, then he shouldn't get another chance. It's difficult to change, but it's possible. If he doesn't want to change then that means he doesn't care about you. Like I said, you can't be with someone who doesn't care about you. You can't be the only one in the relationship. Always take care of yourself first, because boyfriends will come and go, but in the end, you are all you have.
solightninglove answered Monday August 11 2008, 6:42 pm: if he isn't capable of listening to what you have to say and continues to act like this you Should definately break up with him. in the end the decision is yours. he should be treating you like a princess and hes not. so tell him your dissapointed in the way he is acting and see if his attitude changes. there ARE ups and downs to every relationship, but it sounds to me like its mostly downs.. its hard to let someone go if your really love them, just take some time and think about what you want. <3 :) sara
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heybbylovee answered Monday August 11 2008, 6:31 pm: every single relationship ever in existence has its ups and downs. it's natural.
i know it must be hard for you. but my question is: if he KNOWS you don't like it, why does he still do it? you should sit down and have a conversation with him about how it hurts you when he makes promises which he can't keep or does things that you don't like.
honestly, though, you can't control everything about him. no one is perfect. but when he does do things which really upset you, you need to tell him.
don't break up with him, though. you need to give him his space and keep your space with him, too. try to think of what you do like about him as opposed to what you don't like.
you don't want to get rid of him; you just wish he would change. if he doesn't change, then you have to do something different. but little things like like that don't mean much. unless they're REALLY adding up. if it's affecting your relationship on a big scale, definitely take further action. [ heybbylovee's advice column | Ask heybbylovee A Question ]
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