khadiya's advice column

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Q: hi, i know this is going to sound weird and embrassing and this is the reason why i can't tell anyome. im 18
basicly, im still a virgin, but my boyfriend always brushes his penis on my vaginal area and sometimes just leaves it at the entrance. his never cummed on me but sometimes he does have pre-cum on his penis. i last came on my period on the 4th february 2007, and i haven't come on my period since. im so scared that i could be pregnant that i did a early first response pregnancy test on monday which was the 5-03-07. however, it came out negative but i still haven't come on my period. i sometimes get cramps like i feel my period is going to come but it still hasnt.
2 weeks ago i lost a family member and have been really stressed out. do you think this could be the reason for my late period.
i beg you reply back a.s.a.p. im so scared im always crying. please help thank you very much

Yes this could be from stress. Wait this month out and then if it doesnt come on, take the test again. If you continue to feel bad go to the health department. They cant tell your parents anything because your an adult in their eyes.

Q: i'm a girl who just turn 13 and i want to know what sex feels like,i've been fingered by my boyfriend and everything but i'm just wondering what sex actually feels like.

The other person is right but i see this question as hypothetical so ima answer.
IT HURTS THE FIRST TIME! It hurts! There's gonna be some blood. AND its gonna hurt the next couple of times too. BUT when you get used to it thats when you enjoy it. BUT
can you please, PLEASE wait until you are older. DONT BECOME A STATISTIC.

Q: yeah its about time
today i felt like something thick in my underwear
so i went to the bathroom before swim
and like
i saw blood
and i didnt have a pad or a tampon
so for swim my friendsaid we are gonna be swimming for about an hour
your gonna be ok
and i was
but im supposed to wear a tampon
but iono
what to do
and
how do i get rid of the stain
and i still haent told my mom
but i told my sisters

helpppp !!!

Your supposed to wash the panties with cold water ASAP!!! But anither thing, why not tell your mom? shes had it before and so have your sisters!!

Q: Does anyone know how many hours of sleep per night (on average) an adult needs? I've got too much research to do, and often feel I don't get enough sleep..while at other times, I press snooze too many times and can't get out of bed.

8 to 10 hours is the norm. but i prefer more. LOL

Q: Hi, i'm about 5'6 105. I know that i'm i guess.. "considered" thin, but i don't really believe it myself sometimes. I often feel fat and i always want to lose weigh. I come up with different diets, like eating just salad (lettuce with fat free dressing.) I do like food sometimes, so i'll want to eat something and feel kinda bad about it. I feel like i'm never thin enough.

You are actually too thin for your height. Your supposed to weigh between 115 to 120.
There is no reason for not to feel thin enough.
I bet your beautiful.
Eating healthy is good, but losing wieght is a no no.
Get some consuling, PLEASE!

Q: I have the urge to have sex all the time. It is so hard. I don't have a boyfriend. Well I have had alot of boyfriends but my boyfriend just broke-up with me and now im single. And all the boyfriends I have had were to good to have sex. How do I stop these urges?

masterbation is the key.
try it.

Q: i had a long history with my ex. i still have feelings for him [not so much, but something's still there.. you could say he was my first love.]

Well today was my 1 month anniversay with my boyfriend. So I hung out with him then he left. And an hour or so later, I got to hang out with my ex.. and he kissed me.
I didn't stop him. And he kissed me other times. I've tried moving my head because i didnt want to..it didn't seem right but he moved with me and planted a kiss.

Is kissing cheating ?
I thought heavy making out/sex was cheating.

Some people take this as cheating.
Would you like it if your boyfriend of one month kissed his ex girl?

Q: my girl freand and i have a Weird relationship she and her freands constanly make me feel like i shouldn't be around them becuse of they way they treat each other and how she just pulls me back in to the relationship even though she once before broke up with me and now she is back with me. the reason for this is because i wanted her to and i thought she loved me now her freand tommy a muscle bound jerk picks up the phone while i am talking to my gf and says don't you call again after that my frist instinct was to delete her number. two days later she dosen't even remember it and i am sick and tired of this and i want to break up with her but i feel that i can't what should i do?

I was gonna answer this question but you cant spell, so i refuse.

Q: does anyone know of a store that sells girl's boardshorts? websites please!!!!!i would like some around $20's.

THNX!

Pac sun. Or ae. Im pretty sure these stores sell them.

Q: i am wondering can someone mistake their period for spotting and in acuality be pregnant?

Yes it can happen. A test is your best option. OR wait til the next month and see if you miss it again.

Q: I am considering getting my nipple pierced, but I am only 16.. Do nipple piercings screw up your nipple or breast? (considering both of mine are still developing) And how bad is the scarring? Thank you!

My friends has this done. I havent seen no evidence of scarring but Its very painful. VERY PAINFUL. I would wait til your done with school so you wouldnt have to go to school in pain!!

Q: Last week I was on the last day of my period, like that morning when i woke up it was practically gone. Well that night I had sex with this guy and he used a condom, but we stopped having sex for like 20 or so minutes and then did again and he used the same condom!! yes i know bad idea, but it happened. Well Im not sure if im pregnant i bought a pregnantcy test, but I know there is a certain time when a woman is most likely to get pregnant something with the time of the cycle. Everyone I ask tells me something different, so if anyone knows for sure when it is please please let me know.

5 to 7 days after your period for ovulation to start which lasts 14 days. And it takes 7 days for a sperm to meet an egg. Im pretty sure you arent pregnant. The sperm will be dead before your egg even begins to drop.

Q: you know the game virtual hills and laguna beach?
i dont know if any of you play it, but i was wondering when you enter a clothing store how do you buy from it. not from the catalouge.

thanks in advance :) ♥

I dont know but when you run out of money you know you have to pay for more money right???

Q: ok so heres the thing im to this water park the first and second of April and yeahh whats some good ideas to loose some weight? my dead line is April 1st..i weigh about 106 ish and i wanna loose some weight...and what are some good foods i can try that will help me? thanks!

You weigh 106? And you wanna lose weight?
Baby girl, you are thin. You are a nice size.
Stay that way and get help. PLEASE!

Q: well today my bff called me a pendeja(its a bad word in spanish)when i walked away she told me that she was just joking around and that i take everything to personnal she said that i was like her mom then she said that she was just getting revenge for freshmen year when i got mad at her for wat other people said(we are in 10 grade now)then 2day after school she waited for me but i was so mad at her that i walked ahead of her she then her friend asked why i was doing that she said that i was mad at her i just left and she just stayed wit her other friend.Wat should i do?

I think that you took this too seriuosly. You should just let it go. I mean thats your bff. If she said she was just playing then im pretty sure she was just playing.

Q: would i be able to lose maybe 10 pounds before april 17 and also see results? im going to florida and i want to look skinnier, right now im not fat but im not really skinny and i want to look nice in a bikini =]

Not fat but not really skinny....
That means your normal.
I dont think you can lose 10 pounds in so little time unless you exercise every day and diet.
Running, situps, crunches, and good food.

Q: i hate my best friend. we;ve only been friends for like 1 and 1/4 years we've never fought before, but now we fight like, every weekend. i always feel like its my fault, and she just doesn't get what im going thru, i've told her and she still doesn't get it. i just want time away from her, just for like 1 week, but if i'm not talking to her for like 2 minutes (like i stop talking and don't say anything again just 4 like 2 minutes WHILE WE ARE IN CLASS and im just doing what the teacher told us to, she gets mad) and then after shes mad, she goes and HAS to tell my other friend.... she always includes "that other friend" whenever we fight, she goes and tells them what we were fighting about and so iask the other friend what they are tlking about, so she (the other friend) copys and pastes it, and all my (best) friend is sayingis stuff that i do wrong, i mean i cant help it if im not perfect, and she is definetly NOT perfect. im just under soooo much stress right now, and fighting with her is just so annoying. and im starting to hate her but i don't want to lose her as a friend. how do i get less stress and stop fighting with her?

p.s.- sry its so long :(

thanx in advance

She doesnt sound like a real friend.
She is very needy.
I say cut her off. If you dont want to do that put her at a distance. Stop calling her as much, when she gets mad ignore her.
show her that you are tired of her nonesense.

Q: how can i stay more relaxed at school? usually i feel kinda tense, unless for like when classes start/end, in gym, lunch... er... yea like that. like even in homeroom when i walk in sometimes i feel like theres attention on me, especially if i was late. like today i was late because of my bus so it wasnt really my fault and i couldnt have prevented it. so i try to get there early when like nobodys there when i feel comfy. but then sometimes i start to feel kinda twitchy, especially when nobody is talking and its like quiet.. and maybe like the teacher is just talking, and i may not be around my friends in the class. ughh i'd like to be more comfy.. im not exactly sure why i feel like.. i guess it would be anxious.

This may sound silly but sing a song in your head. Anything to make you pay attetion to yourself.
I think the reason you maybe feeling this way is because you have a low confidence level. I know thats kinda of harsh but that is what it seems like. You need to either ignore the ppl or let them KNOW you know they are looking. Make eye contact. Wave or something. When they realize you are looking they will leave you alone.

Q: My best friend and I haven't been doing so well. It first started when I started trusting this guy that her boyfriend hated. The problem is me and this guy have become close friends now. And Ive like liked him for months. Sometimes I can't stop thinking about him. The problem is im too afraid to tell him how I feel for three reasons:

1.) I dont want my friend to get really mad when she finds our I actually do like like him.
2.) Im afraid everyone will bug me and say "We Knew It!!" (Ill explain after)
3.)Im afraid he'll stop being my friend and ignore me...

We flirt ALL the time. I should say about 14 times a school day or so. He usually starts it though because i cant because of my friend. He has called me "My Love" before and once said we were going out to make a guy jealous. But there was a rumor a week or so ago saying he liked my other best friend and that really tore me up. We still flirt and sometimes he'll ask me if I like him and ill say no cause im too shy and ill ask him and he says no. So I dont know if he meant the no or not like i didnt mean mine. Im too afraid to tell im cause right now he is one of the only people who seem to even care about me right now (even as a friend). What should I do?

Well first you said your friend's boyfriend hated the guy so she shouldn't have a problem. The next time he asks do you like him say maybe. Because he is saying no because you are.|
But like i was saying i understand that her boyfriend dislikes this guy but that has nothing to do with her and if she gets mad at you for pursuing something that will make you happy then she isnt a real friend.

Q: I take the SAT on Saturday. I'm REALLY good at the math part, but I'm horrible at reading those long passages and answering questions. How can I prepare for the SAT reading section in 4 days?

*I'm not really that horrible at the reading, just average.

I dont know how to exactly tell you how to prepare but when you are taking the test and you know there are questions to the passages, read the questions before you read the passages. So when you are reading, And you see an answer you can skip through a couple of sentences.

bio

Its A brand new year!! And I havent really been giving advice lately so now IM BACK!! If you have something to ask dont hesitate to ask. DONT BE SHY!! I've been there! Or I know someone who has!

I am a black albino female whose been through alot!!! I have a lot advice to give. Im a very knowledgeable person, and i look at things from many different views. Im very blunt, so if you dont want to hear it straight dont ask me!! any thing else you wanna know get at me!

LET ME REINTRODUCE MYSELF REAL FAST, REAL QUICK!
iM A BLUNT PERSON, IF YOU ASK A GROWN UP QUESTION, IMA GIVE A GROWN UP ANSWER. RECENTLY A GIRL ASKED HOW TO GIVE A BLOWJOB AND I WAS VERY BLUNT AND UPFRONT WITH HER. I GOT SHUNNED FOR MY ACTIONS SO, BASICALLY. IM GOING TO TRY TO AVOID ANSWERING QUESTIONS LIKE THIS. BECAUSE ALL THOUGH THESE KIDS ASKING THESE QUESTIONS ARE YOUNG, THEY OBVIOUSLY BEEN DOING SOMETHING THEY AINT GOT NO BUSINESS DOING BECAUSE THE WOULDNT BE ASKING THOSE TYPES OF QUESTIONS.