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A quick note: If I answered a question and you have further questions for me, please include a URL link to your original question(s) so that I can be sure of what we're talking about. Questions that reference something we talked about a week ago that I can't quite remember are kinda hard to answer.

Welcome to my column.

I don't apologize for my answers. I speak to the audience, and in doing so I sometimes tell the audience things they don't want to hear or cant handle.

I believe in stands on principle. I believe that doing right for the sake of doing right is a good way to live. I believe in self awareness and encourage it in others. I offer the most unbiased viewpoint I have. And yes, I am only human.

Im going to tell you what I think you need to hear. You are not supposed to take what I say and follow it. You are supposed to take what I say and _think_about_it_

Oh, and feel free to ask me questions, but netspeak, ebonics, terrible grammar, and your teen angst about a crush will be ignored.
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I'm 16 i have been with my boyfriend for about 4 months now, and its gotten to the point where we fight a lot but any time i try to leave him, he talks me out of it, i kinda wanna be with other guys but im not sure, i love him. But i've been talking to this other guy (just friends) and i fell for him, and i just dont know what to do about it because i love my boyfriend, but there;s always that temptation to be with someone else.. HELP! (link)
If you're 4 months in and want to date other guys, break up and date other guys.

Yeah, he's going to try to talk you out of it. He likes you/wants to be with you. You don't. Thus, the relationship is doomed. I'd bet half your fights take place because you really don't want to put up with his shit, and try to anyway because you're a decent person and like him enough to stay.

A big part of relationships is figuring out what you can take by way of another person's shit and what you can't, and finding someone you care about enough to let alot of the little things slide.

If four months in you can't let things slide, and don't want to put up with his shit, then don't. You'll be happier if you get back out into the dating world and give yourself some chances to figure out what else you might like in a guy, see if there's someone who better matches what you need and what you can tolerate in another person.

You don't have to hate a guy to break up with him. You don't even have to dislike him. Things just have to not fit right. It sounds like things don't fit right here.

So when you break up, let him know that it's not that you hate him or can't stand him, it's just that you don't feel like you and he fit together well and you want to go find out who and what else there is out there that might fit better. Sometimes people can't be together, not because one of them is a horrible person, but just because there are too many differences and not enough reason to overcome them.

Let him down easy, but be firm about it. Don't allow him to talk you into staying or guilt you about it. Because the one thing that's guaranteed is if you stay with a guy you can't deal with long enough, you will end up hating each other.

Don't push yourselves to that point. Drop it now while you're both amicable enough to walk away undamaged.


i'm 22 f and my bf is 24 we've been together for 4 months but were friends for 2 years before. resently conversations about the future have been coming up. he says that he would love to marry me and be with me always but wants to be together for longer before he makes that comitment. however when the subject of kids came up he was more excited. i want to have kids with him but i feel that this is more important to him then marriage. which doesn't fly in my books. i'm a little old fashioned that way. is this just me being crazy or should i really worry about it. (link)
Kids are kinda more important than marriage. Marriage is your relationship together, kids are an entirely separate life you're both equally responsible for.

Guys aren't taught to look forward to their wedding day from a young age. We're too busy playing space cowboys and sports to even think about that stuff as children. Being a father, however, is a primal, elemental drive which can be present in a guy naturally.

Taking marriage seriously is a good thing. Kids are easy to get excited about, the prospect of having little bundles of joy and annoyance is something most people can get excited about easily. Marriage is not something we're hard wired to desire, it's a societal construct that people learn to value (or don't) based on their own personal histories, desire, and personality.

You're being crazy, and your relationship is four months old. Further, there's a big leap for a guy from "Bachelor" to "husband" mentally. It's a weird place, I speak from experience. I was kinda disconcerted when the idea of "I'm someone's husband" sunk in. It's an outward sign of "adulthood" that guys don't usually think about until we're wearing the label, and then it's kind of a dizzying idea.

I don't really know how to quantify it better than that. I'm 26 and married. It still feels weird sometimes. People see the ring on my finger and look at me differently, expect different things of me automatically. It changes the ways people see you as a person when you may not see yourself as that person internally yet. I got married, and I didn't feel like a different person. But I definitely get different reactions.

Also, kinda like when the year changes and you still say it's 2010, it took a ridiculously long time to transition out of the five years of "my girlfriend" to start saying "My wife".

It's just a big mental jump that guys aren't taught to mentally prepare for the way girls are. We don't have men's magazines that talk about getting married. We've got magazines which assume you're single, or that assume you're married. The transition isn't something heavily emphasized in our culture, and so it clubs most of us guys upside the head when it happens.


So for those of who are familiar with the term gray rape, I want to explain a situation to you and you can tell me whether or not this is gray rape. I'm 19 and I have a new boyfriend, and he's really great :), but back in October before I met him, I decided to hang out with my ex boyfriend, who at the time had no idea what he wanted.

I had previously text him sexy pictures of myself the day before that he decided that he wanted to hang out with me. He told me that yesterday made him realize what he wanted. I told him that he wasn't getting laid becuase I did not believe in having sex with someone who wasn't my boyfriend, I'm not really for the idea of casual sex. Well, I got my dad to give him a ride to his house, and we went upstairs in his room.

While were upstairs in his room, we were watching the first episode of this anime series on netflix, and I started kissing him. Eventually he decided to take our makeout session onto his bed and we ended up having oral sex or foreplay, which is about as far as I like to go when I'm hooking up with someone. Well, I watched him take things one step forward, and he put on a condom. He had casual sex with me, and I didn't say no, thinking about that makes me feel really violated.

I still feel really violated from that time, because I felt like he went against my moral standards. I plan on talking to my current boyfriend about this. In your opinion is this "gray rape?" (link)
Grey rape is not a term. It is not real. There is no such thing. Do not refer to this as rape to anyone you or he knows, again.

Unless there is something you aren't telling us, some element of coercion, you chose to allow sex to happen and did not assert yourself as an adult to stop it.

Sex and sexuality are complicated. Children like you are not supposed to participate because you are apparently incapable of communicating like adults, deciding like adults, and asserting yourselves like adults.

Children have this ridiculous idea that sexuality can and should be compartmentalized. It's ok to get naked, to have oral sex, but to go "all the way" violates moral standards.

That's wrong. This is not an issue with morals, but rather an issue with your personal comfort zone. Your arbitrary line in the sand of what you've decided you're comfy with.

The last girl I actively dated before I married my wife, did not want to have sex right away. She slept over a few times prior to us sleeping together, the clothes stayed on and all we did was a little light making out while watching movies. When we made the adult decision, we had sex. We did not divide up sexual intimacy, and when I wanted to have sex before she was ready for it she told me so, and I backed off.

That is adult communication. That is how you are supposed to behave. She was into me, too. The attraction electrified the air between us. She wanted to be intimate with me as much as I did her, but she knew she wasn't ready, and she asserted herself over both her desires and mine to make it clear what she wanted/needed to happen.

When that changed, we slept together. That is how it is supposed to be.

If you can't assert yourself, don't put yourself in a situation where the logical conclusion to the day's activities is sex, and then not say anything to object. That is your responsibility as a sexually active individual, to set clear expectations and limits so that the other person isn't trying to figure out.

What you did was disrespectful to your ex boyfriend, from the sound of it. You treated him like something less than an equal in what was going on, like his job was to give you what you were comfy with and not want/do anything more. You treated his desires and needs as if they were inconsequential, you did not communicate with him and still expected him to dance to a tune you were not playing.

That is disrespectful. He has the right to know what your limits are, to have them expressed to him coherently, and to make his own decisions about what he wants to happen within those limits, if anything at all. Getting horny and being unsatisfied is generally frustrating for people, you never gave him the chance to decide if he wanted to back off because you never let him know he wasn't going to get what he wanted, and you never let him know that sex with him wasn't what you wanted.

Imagine, if you will, how he'd be feeling if the sex was more than casual to him, and it wasn't to you. That's not outside the realm of possibility of what just happened, from what you described in your question. You described it as "he had casual sex with me, I feel violated now"

How do you think a guy who wants emotional and physical intimacy with a girl he's into is going to react to find out that she considers what just happened to be "casual"?

I think you did not assert yourself, feel bad for it, and want to blame someone. Hence the use of a false term like "grey rape".

Stop having sex. That includes hooking up. If you aren't willing to sleep with someone and everything that implies, keep the action above your clothes and start telling people what you want, else differing expectations and desires are going to burn you again in the future. And probably burn some other people along the way.


Hi,

I know we are not supposed to use the messaging in this way, but I did not see a forum link on your page. I just wanted to let you know that the a good deal of the info you researched on the rating program was wrong.

Its a shame, because it is exactly what the other person is after and considering that you read my reply (and hence knew that I was working with them), you could have asked me first.

I have been with them since 2008. There is no regular retraining aside from the odd quiz or update to the guidelines. Whoever said you spend more hours not getting paid, never made it past the first week or two (thats when you learn the rules and things take time). It takes a few extra minutes to perform tasks that are not paid, and this is taken into account by offering competitive hourly wages.

All things included, it is the best paid part time job available that I am aware of.

I have no stake in this at all, but the info you presented was not correct. I am telling you this since I assume your goal is to present accurate advice.

A. (link)
The reports I read were from people who said they'd been there for several months, a few said they'd tried it almost a year.

I don't know myself, which is why I answered that question saying I'd googled them. If it's working for you, that's great, you found the one work from home that isn't a scam or other way to screw you over. None of the reports I read gave positive reviews of working there, so I didn't get the positive perspective, or see that there was one outside of your experience.

That said, experiences can vary widely and even if you've had good experiences I'm not going to assume you're personally representative of what working with them is like. I don't know you any more than I know the people who posted their reports for me to google, so far as I know you're all correct and factual in your experiences, and if everything I've read so far is fact about the company the bad experiences outweigh your one good one.

Nothing personal, but my answer was factual at least in that these negative reports do exist and the person asking the question would be wise to listen to more experiences than just the one person who it's worked out for.


I am currently a full time college student. I have been working for most of my time in school and the job that I've had has been giving me more and more problems. I understand that in life I will have these types of issues in the future and with the jobs that I will work in... but, it has gotten a little bit out of control. Not necessarily that I'm being treated badly, but my safety is being jeopardized by the time I have to arrive and the fact that my boss wasn't even letting me lock the door in the mornings when I was there by myself. It's a long story and I don't need advise on this job. Bottom line is that I had to quit. I also have to focus on school too because I am planning on going to law school and I need to have good grades. I've managed to get good grades while working the stress was getting to me because like I said, safety was being jeopardized. They weren't even letting me take a lunch break and I had to rush from the office to school in one hour on an empty stomach. They also hired me under false pretenses promising a pay that they could not pay me.

Next Fall, I will have workstudy. Meaning, that I can get a job on campus through the federal work study program. Hopefully, I may even get it in March or April. I am really excited because I'm already involved in so may things in school that it would just be easier. I use the gym at school too so it's so easy to have everything in one place. My friend works on campus and they pay her for her lunch break! Even if it's not a lot of money, it's right on campus and it's enough to pay the bills.

Until then, I will need something extremely light. I was looking into working at home positions. This would be something I could do on the computer during my breaks, at school, maybe even late at night once I finished everything I had to do and I needed to make some extra cash. I have heard of this but I don't know of a legitimate place to go where I can find something like this. Maybe a typing position. Just some basic stuff I can do and either get paid by the hour or by the entries that I submit. I know that I've seen it, but if I use google, then maybe it won't just show legitimate stuff. Can any of you tell me if you've heard of this, are doing it, or know someone who is?

Thank you!

:)

(link)
I did some searching on the below. It's probably the only possibility out there. The pros are as stated, the cons are that you will spend alot more time sitting at your computer than you think to make your money.

I've read about twenty different reports from people on lionbridge in the last ten minutes which mostly state that you'll log in, there will be no work. You'll have to check back in regularly to catch work when it's there, you're basically competing for time with other people because there is a limited amount of work and a potentially unlimited number of workers.

It's basically a contract job. You pick up contracts and work them as they are available for you to do so. If your hours of access are limited, you could go a week without working just because you weren't online when work was actually available. Most people who make it work are stay at home moms who can sit with netflix and the company website both open and tab back and forth every five minutes to see if there is something to do.

Between that and regular retraining, more than one person has posted that you get paid for one of every three hours you actually devote to trying to work for them, even though the hour you get paid for is the only hour you spend doing official "work".


what does I'll let you know something mean after a job interview? (link)
Probably that you didn't get the job. Most jobs will give you a definite answer if they hire you, or are interested in doing so. If they want a second interview, they'll schedule it or tell you you're coming in for a second interview and that they'll call you and some semblance of when. If you're hired they'd obviously tell you. If your hiring depends upon something but it's a possibility they'll explicitly state what you're waiting on and give you a time frame. Assuming this isn't some mom and pop store somewhere or something, these are pretty much part of the standard hiring playbook and trained by every major corp in the US.

When you're not hired, they'll give you a vague brush off like "I'll let you know" with no timetable attached. If all you got was that one line, there's a 90% chance you didn't get the job. Feel free to hope, but keep looking actively until you hear from them and don't turn down another job if you get it hoping to hear back from them.

If you didn't get the job don't expect to hear back from them. Unless you're interviewing for a serious position or they honestly can't hire you but would like to in the future, you'll probably never get a call. No one wants to risk the angry blow up of "I need a job" in the current economy, they'll just let you leave thinking it's possible and never call you again. Also pretty standard in the hiring playbook.


My daughter will be 21 in February and is planning a trip to Las Vegas with her best friend and a few other people in March. I have several problems with this mainly because of the area and what goes on in Vegas. Along with that is a little bit of mistrust with my daughter from previous mistakes. I gave the option of her being able to go it her father and I went but stayed in a separate room from her and her friends. Not to mention her friend's mother is paying for the room. She does not think this is fair and I am looking to hear opinions on wether I should allow her to go parent-free or not. Is my option fair? (link)
It's not her choice, it's yours.

You don't get to allow her to go or not. It looks like you've realized this to some degree even if you haven't fully accepted it. You get to choose whether you will be the overbearing father who imposes himself upon his daughter, or doesn't. As an adult yourself you have the money to get a room, you can choose to show up, you can even choose to try to follow her around.

Here's the thing. You don't really have a right to impose on her trip. If you weren't her father you'd be stalking her by following against her will, but because you're her dad you'd never get prosecuted for it or anything. It's up to you to choose to be the shit head who can't let go of his daughter, or the father who realizes his time of "allowing" his daughter to do anything is over.

What you haven't realized is that your daughter has the _right_ to make her own mistakes in life, to try to learn from them. Your mistrust is bullshit, you're treating a 21 year old woman like a child because she's your child. Just because it's how you feel about her doesn't mean it's a fact, legally or in reality.

She might well go to vegas and fuck someone. You want to be in the other room when she makes that adult choice, as is her right? You want to be there to see her wasted with her friends?

Daddy isn't going to be there to protect her from the world forever. Just because you think you should doesn't mean you actually should. At some point you will have to let go.

The situation is fucked up. You're making it fucked up. You can choose to go. You can choose not to. But stop giving yourself the illusion of allowing your daughter anything. The only control you have any more is over yourself, whether you impose yourself, your views, your judgments on her.

It sounds like she's got enough of that from you already. As someone who doesn't speak to his parents any more precisely because of the attitudes and perspectives you're displaying, stop before you lose your ability to have the adult relationship your daughter deserves. The time for your judgments, opinions, and attempts to control your daughter are over.

You won't ever establish a loving adult relationship with her if you don't let her come to it on her terms.





me and my girlfriend have been seeing each other for a while i dont want to find a new girlfriend but the one i have doesnt want to have sex but u am always horny so i was wondering if there was anything around the house i could use as a fake vagina because i do not want to go bug one or anything the are expensive? (link)
You're probably not old enough to buy sex toys, sadly. If you ever do, keep it to yourself, there's a strong (and stupid) stigma associated with guys who buy sex toys for themselves. There are plenty of websites which sell effective toys for men out there when you're old enough to buy them.

That said, you need to learn to deal with it on your own for now. There aren't many girls who can keep up with a teenaged male libido. It'll calm down once you've fully exited puberty to some degree, be easier to manage when you are ravenous.

Right now, not having sex isn't something you should be focusing on. The below poster is right, and wrong, about that. Relationships are supposed to teach you how to interact with and compromise with a person.

That said, when I was in high school I did not date girls who didn't want to have sex. I've always been responsible, used protection, but there comes a point where two people want two different things sexually and as individuals that can make you incompatible. If she wants to wait until marriage, move on, as you obviously don't. If she's a virgin and not ready or something, or just wants to keep waiting for now because she's not ready to have sex with you, be patient and figure out how to handle yourself.

You don't sound old enough to judge whether there's sexual compatibility between you, or that you're dating girls old enough to make prepared adult decisions about sex and who have experience.

In your 20s, if a girl doesn't want to sleep with you there's a point where you just want different things, that you'll hopefully have the awareness and wisdom to see and figure out for yourself. Right now, I'm betting you're in the midst of teenaged hormones which you need to learn to manage yourself.

In the absence of sex toys, you can still buy lube. Astroglide isn't too expensive and will help you be less rough on yourself if you need to relieve yourself a few times a day.

Its understandably driving you nuts, but if you can't control yourself well enough to stay in a relationship you like you don't need to be seeking out another one which will let you get laid. Not now, when the point of a relationship is learning how to be in a relationship, as opposed to later when you know how to be in a relationship and are seeking someone compatible with you who you can start to share a life with.


Okay, here's the dealio. I'm in tenth grade and the guy I like is in eleventh. We've known each other since I was in sixth grade because we're on the same bus. We only ever talk on the bus, but I really like him.
Nearly a month and a half ago now he told me that he likes me and I told him that I like him, too. But now he hasn't done anything. He still talks to me, but he acts like it nevet happened. Sometimes he says something that makes me think he's about to ask me out, but he never does.
If he really liked me, wouldn't he have asked me out by now? Was he just saying that, or maybe he meant that he liked me as a person, but not like THAT, even though he was shy to tell me and made me guess?
Or maybe he changed his mind?
What do I do?

I'm 15/female, going on sixteen and he's seventeen.

Also, does it mean anything if sometimes he acts like he's so much older and wiser, or his he just kidding? (link)
There's like a 99% chance he's shy and doesn't know how to approach it, that he's looking for some definite sign that lets him know "now is the time, she'll say yes, ask her out"

Thing is, 17 year old guys seldom actually notice the signs that say "she'll say yes, ask her out".

Guys don't change their mind about this and still pay much attention to you. If you think he's about to it's because he's probably trying to work up the nerve and failing.

Be blunt. Tell him you like him as more than a friend, you hope he feels the same way, and if he does you've been waiting for him to ask you out for forever.

Also, the older and wiser thing means he's trying to impress you, which is a dual "he wants you to be attracted to him" and "he's trying to work up his courage by making himself feel older and wiser". Usually.

Something that will probably work really well. Walk up to him. Tell him you've been waiting for him to ask you out. Kiss him on the cheek. Smile at him and say "If you want to kiss me back, all you have to do is ask" and walk away to let him think about it for a while.


i'm 5 days late, and i have all my normal period symptoms but i took a cheap 8 dollar test and it came up positive . i live in florida so you have to be 18 to get an abortion, am i pregnant ? or should i take another test cause i heard of false positives . please help asappp!!! (link)
While false positives are possible, they're absolutely rare. It's possible to have a period early on in a pregnancy and still be pregnant. Take another test if you need, but even if it comes up negative you'd be foolish to not go to a doctor and have them check.


i'm 21 f and a few weeks ago found out i was pregnant my bf and i were really excited (were planning to get married anyway) it was such a great feeling but my family wasn;t on board with the idea it was stressing me out witch my bf said to calm down since that wasn't good for the baby. well long story short two days ago i lost my baby. my bf and i are really upset i blame all the stress and i did take a tumble down the stairs as well. i feel so down and upset is it just gref of am i depressed? please help if its depression i would like to seek help (link)
A miscarriage can absolutely depress you, you should seek a therapist to talk to. It is grief, but that doesn't mean it can't also be depression. Grief you haven't dealt with can easily lead to depression. Grief counseling after a loss is not unusual, go talk to someone.

And I'm sorry for your loss.


so don't tell me not to do this because i'm really determined. i know it may be bad but i really need to do this

i need to hack onto someones facebook account. does anybody know a good website or even a person who will help me? also, i'm looking for a FREE source. i dont want to pay. i know that paying will help me better chances but i'm not willing to pay.

please dont go through the trouble to stop me because i really have to figure this out. i know its bad and i dont want to go into full detail why i'm doing this, but i'm just looking to see if anybody knows a person who is good at it, or a source that can help me? or at least instructions how to do it. THANK YOU SO MUCH!

also, if facebook hacking is too hard. i do know the persons email. so maybe try hacking into their email? they have hotmail. thank you so much! (link)
Not possible. You will not find a way to do what you seek.
Actual hacking requires establishing a direct connection to another computer, and you can't just hack an account. You have to hack the computer the account is hosted on, which would be hacking facebook directly for long enough to find his specific account information. Doing so would have cops at your house within a day or two to confiscate your computers for a felony.

People don't do this for a reason. There is no gain, and it's way too easy to track. Most hacking is a person directly messing with a computer, which you obviously cannot do, you're not going to break into facebook headquarters and jack into a server. Doing it remotely means that you are committing a felony which can very, very easily be tracked back to you.

Facebook and e-mail hacking is a myth. You won't just ask a question and figure out how to do it, no one who actually knows how would share that knowledge with someone who's just going to go get themselves busted.

What you are asking will not happen. You're wasting your time trying to figure it out, it's not something you can have instructions provided to you on. Security intrusion is something people spend years learning how to do and usually get paid very good money for once they've learned how. There's no magic program or 10 step instruction booklet.

If you hear someone say they hacked an account, what that really means is they guessed someone else's password, or watched them enter it and used it themselves, etc.


My boyfriend and have been having a lot of sex and he said it'd be easier if we used some lube to get things started at first because I don't get really, really wet. I have some lotion (unscented and scented varieties) here and I was wondering if that works okay as lube for sex or not? We're both kind of young and we're both embarrassed to go to the the store for sex lube lol So, does lotion work well? (link)
If you're too embarrassed to go buy lube you're too young to be having sex. This is why we tell kids not to sleep together, you're not mature enough to handle even the most mundane of sex related activities. Do you blush when you buy condoms too? (Please God tell me one of you buys condoms)

To directly answer your question, no, you should not put anything in your vag that wasn't designed for that purpose. Buy lube or stop having sex, preferably the latter.


In my daughter's school there will eventually be a swimming unit in gym class some times in the following semesters and both boys and girls have the class together. Isn' t kind of wrong to force young people to be in bathing suits in front of each other? Even if its one piece? I assumed they would be seperate. Daughter is in 8th grade by the way (link)
There is absolutely nothing wrong with it. If your daughter has an issue with it she needs to get over her self consciousness. If you have a problem with it you need to get over your over-conscientiousness.


So, my birthday is coming up soon and I know my mom's going to start asking me what I want for a present. I was thinking maybe a new computer, because I already have a laptop and it kind of gets glitchy a lot because it's a couple of years old. I was looking at my dad's computer, which is one of those newer ones that are really small, because in a year when I go off to college, I'd like something that wouldn't take up a lot of space. I don't really know a lot about computers though :/ Any good brand names I should look at? I just want it to be reliable, fast, and for it to be able to play some games like Sims without glitching up. So, if any of you know a lot about computers, any advice you can give me? I know the people at the store are supposed to help you but I'm always paranoid that they're just showing you the expensive stuff so they can make more money :b anyways, thanks for any advice! :) (link)
You want a Dell. For college, Dell.

They've got some decent laptops, not too big, which will do whatever you want it to do. Make sure you get something with a video card and at least 300 gigs of hard drive space. 3 gigs of ram, but that'll probably be standard anyway.

Dell's customer service sucks most of the time, but their actual warranty is what's great. They've got accident coverage and stuff. When your room mate spills something on your computer and you can get a new one, you'll be thankful for it. Get a Dell laptop with a 4 year warranty.

I don't like Apple, but if you specifically want a mac their warranties aren't all that bad.

Stay away from anyone else. You don't want to buy a computer from best buy.


My best friend & I are very close. I dont know what it is about him but I can feel like I can trust him with EVERYTHING & ANYTHING. Everyone who knows how we are around eachother always tell us that we would make the cutest couple because we care about eachother so much. When I tell him about something stupid I might do he goes through so much to stop me & im the same with him. Does it sound like we should be a couple? (link)
Picture yourself kissing him.

Fluttery feeling? Probably should date him.

Bored/disturbed/nauseated? Probably not.


Hey Witty
You might find this interesting.

http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=589234

- Razhie

PS. Please reject this question. If you want to respond, you can hit me up at my forum here on Advicentors: http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=20556
Happy Holidays! (link)
Wow. I'm not entirely convinced that isn't genuine. It would take a genius to craft something that good without being that crazy. And to ask it directly to you, writing something that long implies a dedication that means he's a bit crazy one way or the other.

You should have just replied "So explain to me how Reaganomics works!" and left it at that.


I have a really spoiled best friend and I really can't stand being around her anymore. Her parents have lots of money and my friend gets showered with money all the time. The last time my friend and I went to the mall her dad gave her $200 and said here honey have fun! I have an allowance and I actually have to work to get my money and my friend has never done any work in her life! She wears expensive clothes and has a container ten times the size of a shoebox chock full of makeup she never wears! She makes me so mad! She brags about it too!
Please help me!
Thank you :) (link)
It's really hard to gauge how much your friend is a brat and how much you are jealous to give you the proper advice.

Yeah, it's ridiculous that she got 200 to go shopping at the mall. I just went and spent 200 on groceries, and we feel like we bought way too much stuff and spent too much. Some people are born into families like that.

If you can't deal with it, leave her alone. The fastest way spoiled brats learn not to be is facing negative reactions to the way they act. She'll either learn it or not, but you can't teach it.

I tried that once. Former friend who was one of the "girl looks fairly attractive, acts like people are supposed to worship her because of it" case of entitlement. She treated guys like shit because they were supposed to adore her and want her, and girls worse because "you're not as pretty as me makes you a lesser person" which adds up to pretty much the same thing you might be facing.

I told her that if all she placed value in was her looks that's all anyone else would care about either, and when the looks ran out or she treated enough people like shit she'd be the only one still valuing anything about her.

I was way more eloquent than that actually saying it to her, didn't help. Worse, she got pregnant by one of five guys, claimed a sixth one (who was in jail for some misdemeanor something and couldn't possibly be the father) was the daddy, and is living in another city now in a condo his parents bought for them and had a shitty white trash courtroom wedding with pictures of her seven month baby bump and a dude who was probably arrested for public intoxication in the background. She's happy as can be.

Not only did she not learn anything, but she's pretty much turned to shit as a person since and is leeching off some dude and his family to keep her lazy ass doing nothing and posting facebook messages asking if soon to be mommy can find some weed.

Now that you've taken all that in, I want you to think for a second how pissed off I was (and still am, to have written all that crap out for a question someone asked) about what happened and I want you to imagine how you'll feel if you try to talk to her about working for and earning what you have and then watch her get her way paid by daddy up to and maybe past the point where she marries some guy who's willing to take care of her and let her do whatever the hell she wants.

Put up with it or walk away.


What is the easiest way to get sticky tack off bc I've tried scratching it off didn't work out well:P please help Idk how to get it off?? (link)
Try goo gone (google it, that's the name, "goo gone") with water and a rag.

Should work just fine so long as we're not talking about carpet. If it's carpet/fabric, you might need something with steam.


Okay so I'm 19/female. Been dating a guy online for about 8 months and he's coming to visit me early 2011. The problem is I have so many insecurities and jealousy issues and it always makes us fight, a lot...I guess the reason I have them is because of past relationships, and the fact that my boyfriend used to be an online-flirt(like seriously) doesn't make things any easier seeing as he's still friends with some of those girls, who are really beautiful, and he's made it quite clear in the past just how beautiful they are. I know the past is the past and he's with me now but I can't stop thinking about it, like if he still likes them or secretly still wants them...I'm always finding something to get upset about, trying to find something he's done wrong like I'm waiting for him to mess up even though he's most likely not doing anything wrong. Before he gets here, he's staying with a friend of his because she's the only one he knows that lives close to the airport he's going to and she's giving him a lift there since he can't take his car and she's a model, a typical gorgeous blonde model and I'm worried he's going to be tempted by her. She dresses erotically almost all the time. My boyfriend says there's nothing to worry about because they've always been friends and she has a boyfriend whom lives with her, etc but it's just driving me insane. And I've looked and seen that with his other girlfriends in the past, he's shown them off to so many people online and even though he writes about me in his status' on facebook, i feel like he loved those girls more seeing as the way he wrote about them like he was obsessed with them and i just feel like i don't get as much attention as they did..

I need help. I don't want to feel this way. i want to trust him and actually be with him and enjoy his company and him enjoy mine, i don't want to fight anymore. someone help? (link)
Haha. The below is hilarious. That's what you need, another insecure 19 year old advising you.

He doesn't need to prove himself, you need to break up. You aren't capable of establishing a real relationship with someone you've never met, nor with someone you can't see on a fairly regular basis.

You're basing your evaluation of how much he cares about you on his facebook activity.

Facebook activity. This is not what relationships are. You're not a high schooler any more and soon you won't be a teenager, it's time to leave the kiddy shit behind you and the first step is dating someone you can interact with face to face in such a way that you establish a real relationship and are forced to deal with real relationship issues.

Also, being a guy, let me give you a tip. When a guy talks about his exes and describes how they look to you without being asked and probably convinced to talk about it (which would mean you had issues) he's trying to make you jealous to gauge your interest.

You want to not feel this way? Get a relationship with some substance, where you interact face to face and you can learn (like a normal adult human being) to judge people's actions and figure them out rather than take their words on faith and come up with little verbal mindgames to play with each other to feel each other out (which is what your fights and his bragging both are).

You'll never know if any guy you date can look you in the eye and lie until he does it and gets caught. That won't happen at distance unless he's really fucking stupid. Hence, as you're looking for him to mess up you will never trust him because you'll never really know if he did.

You won't learn to base your trust off positive actions and attributes until you have a boyfriend who is there on a regular basis for you to see and interact with and provide those positive actions and attributes with more than words.

End it. You're growing up, it's time to venture away from the computer.




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